Be me 34 year old mama's bundle of pure joy

>be me 34 year old mama's bundle of pure joy
>she's loved me every day since she was 15
>been in bed all day thinking about tendies
>hear a loud noise from the kitchen
>maybe mama makes tendies for her boy
>gets all excited and waddle into the kitchen
>not without taking breaks in between every 2 steps
>all sweaty and greasy arrive in the kitchen
>mama seems to sleep with her face on the table
>lots of weird tasting ketchup and raw tendies next to her head
>stupid bitch fell asleep while making tendies
>grab the oddly shaped star wars blaster next to mommy and hammer it into the side of her head
>she does not wake up
>REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE until I shit myself
>still no motion
>go back to my room and put tendies from the table into the microwave
>still taste odd
>mfw mama is sleeping for 3 days now and starts to stink
>mfw she doesnt want to talk to her boy
>what did I do to upset mama

Attached: images.jpg (256x196, 7K)

u'r fukin gay

Oof

>what did I do to upset mama

existing you fucking cunt

REEEEEEEEEEEEPOST

How dare you
I'm a bisexual otherkinfluid that identifies as a wolf
on mondays wednesdays and fridays as a dragon on the weekends and as an apache helicopter on tuesdays and thursdays

Im a genderfluid non binary transgender otherkin that identifies as a frying pan that has a blobfish's soul inside and you offended me.

Attached: triggered.gif (512x680, 571K)

>killing herself at 49
Some people are so afraid of being over the hill.

what the fuck did you say to me you fascist republican conservative homophobe transphobe racist misogynous ignorant CRACKER!!!!!

>be me
>Mummy's perfect little 22 year old
>Daddy passed away a few months ago from a hurt chest after yelling at me to get a job
>before he died he put a little me inside Mummy's tummy
>Mummy starts talking about how nice itll be to have a baby around again
>"But aren't I the baby?"
>"user, you know I'm going to need help raising the baby, you're going to be a big brother and that means responsibility."
>i get mad and tell the whore that I'm not going to share her with that thing inside her
>"user, its time to grow up."
>Mummy gets fat and starts asking me to do shit around the house
>changing my own diaper, answering the door, whatever
>"user, could you throw some chicken tenders in the oven for me and get me a prenatal vitamin shake, I've got a craving!"
>TOO
>FUCKING
>FAR
>go upstairs to Mummy's room and grab her nail polish remover off the nightstand
>go downstairs and pour it into stupid fucking healthy-baby drink
>grab her cunt-face
>"Open wide!"
>Mummy chokes down nasty smelling smoothie and starts to scream and cry
>I keep telling her itll be better this way but she wont stop trying to hit me
>shake all gone so I decide to head back to my room for a nap
>she can make up for everything shes done when I wake up
>Mummy calls 911 screaming about bleeding from her piss-flappy downstairs parts
>I stomp on her phone and tell the bitch that if she calls them again I'll put rat poison in the next smoothie
>Mummy lays on floor for a few hours before she drives herself to the hospital after I fall asleep
>Mummy disobeyed me but baby is gone now
>all is well

Attached: liltard.jpg (600x591, 57K)

I identify as plantkin, i drink water and only eat bacteria's shit

no way, OP should've made the joke about that in the original greentext. hilarious!

All fuckin righteous fucking CRACKER! user is doin this shit you fucking cracker i swear to fuckin god.
you everybody type in the chat user is a stupid cracker just type in the chat user is a stupid cracker fuck him

>be me
>be 23
>mummy's special little guy
>at mcdonald's getting chicken tendies with my saved up good boy points
>very long line
>get near the front
>need to go pee pee poo poo
>"MUMMY MUMMY I NEED TO GO PEE PEE POO POO NOW NOW NOW"
>mummy looks embarrassed
>says new daddy won't be happy about this
>takes me to little boys room
>I get into stall and begin my poo poo dance
>accidentally miss toilet
>hear something in other stall
>look over
>A man has pee pee mayo like daddy's all over his hand
>he notices me
>"WHAT THE FUCK YOU LITTLE AUTISTIC SHIT"
>mummy runs into little boys room
>takes me into little girls room
>all the girlies go shrieky
>mama watches me go pee pee poo poo
>get back in line
>finally at front
>"I WANT CHICKEN TENDIES WITH A MINECRAFT TOY"
>mummy hits me
>"we will take an order of chicken tenders to go"
>"BUT MUMMY I WANT TO GO ON THE PLAY PLACE"
>she gives in
>set down at play place
>devour my tendies in one swoop
>"MUMMY MUMMY WHERE IS MY MINECRAFT TOY?"
>she quickly leaves to get me my minecraft toy
>see play place
>waddle over to slide
>begin to climb up play place slide
>somebody comes down the slide knocking us both on the floor
>tendy rage engaged
>REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
>smash kids head against window
>window breaks
>he is crying
>jump on him and sit on his face
>hear a snap
>he goes to sleep
>mummy runs back in with my minecraft toy
>mummy grabs my wrist and rushes me to the car
>"why user, why?"
>says we have to 'go on the run'
>mfw

Attached: pepegiggle.png (710x577, 30K)

Bump
Kek

Post all you got faggot, shit makes me half grin.

>Be my birthday
>Mama got me the Littlest Pet Shop cake I wanted
>Get a card from grammy
>"Enjoy your birthday, sorry I couldn't be there sweety, I hope you can use this"
>A lot of weird green paper in there
>Mamas eyes get big
>Ask her what these are
>"It's money, I use it to buy your chicken and videogames"
>"Can I trade it for good boy points?"
>"Yes you can, of course you can"
>then new daddy walks into the room
>smells like smoke and adult apple juice
>slaps mamas butt
>sees the money
>"I need this for the poker game tonight"
>Mama says no, I traded it with her
>He slaps her faces butt now
>Mama screams
>I'm sitting there eating my cake
>Ask her when dinner is ready
>She says I gotta help her
>This FUCKING NORMIE
>ASKS ME
>TO HELP HER
>ON MY OWN BIRTHDAY
>take off all my clothes and jump on the table
>Press my willy in the cake and run to mama screaming at the top of my lungs flailing my arms
>hit mama in the belly
>hear a loud oomf
>new daddy looks at me
>I look at him
>I get down on my knees and grab his crotch
>he goes back and asks me what I'm doing
>I just wanted to show him I can be mama too
>Run at him and bite him in his crotch
>even though he wore pants he dropped to the ground crying
>now everyone was crying
>my diaper has been full the whole time
>put some cake in diaper since mama isnt changing it and feed it to new daddy
>new daddy never came back after the poker game
>mama made me fresh chicken tendies with a side of pizza that night
>she didn't even charge my good boy points
>best 40th birthday ever

Attached: 23cd67a18a2685f603c22c68908d7088.jpg (736x737, 34K)

>be me mommy's special little boy
>mommy is sitting on the couch making her dose of happiness
>mommy takes a spoon and her brown sugar and burns the spoon
>she grabs a flu shot thingy and sucks the special sugar into it
>she pokes herself with it and falls asleep
>yes, mommy is sleeping
> i take mommy's wallet and go on my favorite website
>they're all naked and doing some weird dance
> i don't know what it is but its fun to watch
> i buy a six month membership to the weird dance club
>i wonder if me and mommy can do that dance
>my peepee gets big and i start doing the dance
> i take off mommy's clothes and then mine
>mommy is blue, she still has the flu shot thingy in her arm
>whatever i wanna do the dance
>17 seconds later some weird milk starts leaking out of my peepee
>mommy doesn't wake up though
>i hope mommy felt as good as i did
>i watch the movies on my computer and see people dancing
>i wanna dance with mommy again...

Attached: mn_non.jpg (400x400, 22K)

>tfw saw mummy take funny white powder from can with mr skeltal on it and sprinkle it on tendies
>tfw tendies only cost 3 gbp today
finally mummy finally treats her big bouncy boy right

Attached: image.jpg (1149x832, 116K)

>wake up at 2pm
>30 year old NEET
>had accident in sleep which I rolled around in
>grab cum-towel off nightstand and do my best wipe mess from my folds of fat
>tummy gurgles loudly, so hungry
>plop out of bed, navigate through shit jugs and piss bottles in my room
>waddle downstairs to check GBP board
>wait a minute to catch my breath before I look
>just enough Good Boy Points for some tendies and sauce!
>legs buckle under own weight
>roll myself into the living room where mummy is watching her favorite soap opera
>"mummy mummy I have enough Good Boy Points for some tendies!"
>she turns to me with the most disgusting look on her face while I lay flat on the ground stuggling to get up
>"s-sure honey, le-let me just get some tendies for you"
>she walks to the kitchen trying hard not to vomit from the smell and sight of my obese, putrid, feces and semen covered body
>she pulls the tendies out of the freezer after letting the oven heat up as she begins to cry into the sink
>I roll over and pull myself up to my high chair that starts to creak as I sit down
>have my crayons and Power Rangers coloring book to occupy me while I wait
>colored most of it so I start drawing doodles outside the lines
>the tendies are finally done and she puts them on my plate
>she can't hold back the vomit as I open my mouth to eat some tendies and vomits all over my plate
>I can't let these tendies go to waste, so I eat them along with the vomit
>"yummy wummy tendies in my tummy, thanks mummy"
>do my best to muster a smile but the rows of decaying teeth only disgust mummy further
>high-chair finally breaks from my heft
>causes me to have another accident
>mum runs away to her room, sobbing uncontrollably, so ashamed of her baby boy
>I just sit there on floor, in my own filth, thinking about what a disappointment I am
>mfw

Attached: whatidowrong.jpg (436x490, 100K)

yo someone put me in the screen capture when this is on reddit

fuck reddit

Attached: 5.jpg (800x600, 37K)

>wake up at 5pm, earlier than usual
>reach for a wee wee jug and start beating it against the floor rhythmically
>"TENDIES TENDIES FOR MY TUMMY, PUT SOME IN THE OVEN MUMMY"
>hear a wail from downstairs
>she always cries since new daddy left
>notice the wee wee jug split and is leaking
>oh well, throw it at the wall for mummy to clean up later
>flip on my surround-sound system bought with a year's worth of GBP
>one and only song on repeat
>"NA NA, NA NA NA NA NA NA NA NA KATAMARI DAMACY"
>hear an even louder wail from downstairs
>silly normies not appreciating music
>figure my tendies are about due
>grab another jug, pound it on the floor
>"TENDIES TENDIES GOLDEN BROWN, MUMMY COOKS THEM BEST IN TOWN"
>mummy gets very upset
>"I CAN'T DO THIS ANY MORE user, I'M SORRY"
>hear something smash and the door slams
>wait for her to bring me my tendies
>wait a whole fucking hour for that lazy bitch
>have to drag MYSELF out of my sports car bed and down the stairs into the kitchen
>no mummy
>broken plate on the floor, tendies still in the oven, nicely done but cold
>ah well, some honey mustard will make things all better
>look in the cupboard
>NO FUCKING HONEY MUSTARD

now I know why she said she couldn't do it any more

Attached: sad peeps.png (657x527, 13K)

>be me
>530 Lbs of mummy's golden child
>sitting on toilet squeezing out a big poo that I've held for a day
>finally drops out along with a BRRRRRAPPPPPPFFPPPPTHTHTHTPPP
>look in the bowl at my masterpiece, skidmarks longer than the M6
>"Mummy, MUMMY, come and see what I did!"
>mum unlocks the door from the outside using the special key for emergencies
>proudly point at the toilet bowl
>wow! You've done so well, and it's all in the bowl too! That's 10 good boy points
>clap my hands because I've been saving my good boy points for weeks, finally at 150
>cash them all in for a special hour with my catgirl
>mummy phones up the people who send the catgirl and talks with them
>hear girl arrive at the door and sit on the end of my bed and take off my pants for the first time in 2 days
>can hear them talking downstairs
>"God, it's not him again is it? He's getting too large for me to do anything"
>hear mummy say "Please, we have a system and it's the only way I can get him to do anything"
>girl sighs and says "I have the catears headband too, I'll be wearing it again?"
>clap my hands because I can tell special time is about to begin
>girl comes into my room and meows and purrs
>have special fun time, she makes my peepee feel good
>the next 50 minutes are spent while I tell her about my comics and my video games
>she's really impressed
>eventually leaves after the hour is up
>mummy comes up with my snack of tendies for being such a good boy
>"enjoy your tendies, snookums, I have to leave now for my nightshift"
>eat my tendies in bed and dream about my waifu Mikasa-san afterwards

How can anyone diss the NEET life? Enjoy your long hours and ungrateful wives, wageslaves.

Attached: big fat pepe.png (772x439, 371K)

this thread is amazing keep it going

HOW DARE YU APOWAJISE.

APOWAJISE

>Finally got enough good boy points to get a 20 piece nug meal at McDonald's
>time to dine like a king
>Ask mumsy to wash my rarity plushy so I can take her on a date (shes my gf and was covered in cummies)
>user, I'll wash it when we get home from McDonald's, I've got laundry running
>"it"
>Oh
>No
>U
>Didnt
>I'm a classy gentleman who will defend his waifu's honor
>walk into the laundry room and open the running dryer, unleashing a torrent of Mountain Dew colored fury from my pee pee into the hot, drying, clothes
>Next, open up the washing machine, sticking my butt in the open lid, filling it with a mess of grumpy dumpies
>After running for a minute, the smell brings mummy in to investigate
>"user, what is that smell?"
>"Now that this load is dirty, you can wash rarity, right?"
>"That does it, user, I'm taking the internet down for the rest of the month and you can forget about chicken nuggets!"
>She rushes from the laundry room with a pair of scissors to cut the cable
>My 430 pound body is too healthy to catch up to the bitch
>I gasp for air in between 'reeeeeeeeeees' and lumber up the stairs to ex new daddy no. 5's old office
>I have her in my sights
>I attempt to charge, but my left arm has shooting pain, coming from my chest
>I clutch my breast and start to cry
>"moooooooooooommiieeeeeee, save your good boy"
>She grabs the phone in tears and goes to dial, but stops
>She looks at me me with tears and mumbles "sorry user...." as she sets the phone down and walks away
That's all I remember. I guess the neighbor heard the commotion and called the cops. Just got released from the er. I reasoned with her not to cut internet. She's even gotten me nugs, tendies, and fries for every meal today! She cry's as she hands them to me, and just mumbles 'sorry' or some shit. Glad she's sad about how she treated me and rarity.

Attached: happy fat peps.jpg (281x281, 12K)

only spineless niggers apowajize

This is AIDS inducing

p.s. im american so we spell it with a z and not and s

>My eyes open and see the blank computer screen
>Mommy must've cut the power to my room
>Joke's on her, over the course of 7 years I have accumulated approximately 13 million Good Boy Points, which should be enough to last me until death
>"TENDIES, TENDIES, IT IS TIME. MUMMY IS AN UNGRATEFUL SWINE," I wheeze with a devilish grin
>Rise up from my chair, a thick layer of grease and mold sticking to the back of my cumstained asscheeks
>Waddle over to the bedroom door, feet squishing through poop and pee
>Light shines in through the windows, realize that I haven't seen the sun in 19 years
>Oh well
>I hear Mommy crying in the other room, slowly move in that direction
>She's sitting at the kitchen table, tears and snot running down her face
>"FIRE DEEP WITHIN MY LOINS, MUMMY WILL PLEASE MY ACHING GROIN."
>The sobbing stops and she looks up
>I'm naked, my cock proudly standing at half mast, most of it weighed down by the various rolls of belly fat
>I slam her weak, anorexic body to the floor and tell her to start sucking
>She's trying to resist, lol
>Easily snap her jaw open
>Her blood makes for excellent lubricant
>"MUMMY SHALL LICK AND LICK, PROVE THY WORTHINESS OF YOUR BABY'S DICK."
>Her teeth begin to fall out, she doesn't need them anyway
>I cum and she makes gurgling noises, spasming and pointing to her throat
>I left her up by her hair, she's not even recognizable anymore
>"MUMMY IS A CHURLISH COW, TO THE FREEZER YOU GO NOW."
>She grabs a box of my favorite brand
>It's Kid Cuisine
>Good fun and good food go great together with Kid Cuisine!

Attached: slurp.webm (512x426, 475K)

APOWAJISE DIS JWAPANESE BORD NOWE

APOWAJISE

> Be healthy 400 pound baby with a loving mommy
> wake up right on time at 5:25pm after a night of intense gaming on garys mod
> Go out with mummy to buy the minecraft sword I was promised, to defend against normies
> Arrive at Gamestop, mom makes GBP transaction with the wagey behind the counter
> Feel instant rush of anger when I finally get the sword, because I need to show I'm superior to dumb wagecucks
> I hit the wagey with it, as hard as my big boned muscles will allow me to
> "user! WHY!?"
> "DUMB WAGESLAVE MADE ME CAVE! LET ME GIVE HIM A BOO BOO OR I DO A POO POO!" I wittily reply
> "user! 200GBP GONE MISTER"
> This dumb bitch thinks she can get away with this, I warned her
> "REEEEEEE" I scream, as I pull down the shelves in the store to block off mommy
> Rip down my diaper, the stench immediately causes the other customers in the store to vomit
> Put my brand new awesome sword between my bum bum cheeks, pointing it behind me
> Start fiercely grinding on the sword, the mere sight causes all the normies in the store to get shocked from amazement
> Can feel the individual pixel changing as I do move it
> Sword is now covered in my healthy, thick blood
> Pee on the sword for good measure
> I am now the master of all the elements, blood, pee pee and poo poo
> "GIVE ME TENDIES NOW MUM"
> Start hitting everyone in the store with the amalgamated weapon
> Everyone flees
> Start rolling around in the aftermath
> Pass out, because I was hungry
> Wake up in bed with tendies on my tummy
> gobble them up and run to living room
> mommy happily swinging on a rope by her neck
> doesn't even poke me with the ouchie-medicine like she does everyday
> Decisive victory

Attached: happybabyboy.png (499x499, 19K)

Attached: 1 (4).jpg (1273x1273, 512K)

>3 am
>12 hours into my League of Legends normie killing campaign
>playing my waifu jinx
>some normie is obviously using hax and kills me.
>I manage to hold back a scream. Only for my beautiful waifu
>still angry, decide to eat tendies for comfort.
>reaches to special curves
>lifts tendie fold
>no tendies, only sweat and barbie q sauce
>pull out my sauce covered hand, screaming in rage
>why didn't mommie restock my folds yet
>screaming continues, using my rage to stand
>pukie all over keyboard from the stress
>smell of barbie q and pukie fills the air
>how dare mommie make me look like this in front of my Jinxie
>lumber to the door, barb ba qu sauce drips down my body as it mixes with sweet.
>"MOMMIE MOMMIE YOUR SWEET BABY BOY IS HUNGRRYY"
>I can hear a panic shuffling. Mommie must know the wrong she did.
>"MOMMIE YOU'VE BEEN BAD TO YOUR BABBY BOY"
>throws self down the stairs, my big boy bones are too heavy for the steps and the stair chair is too slow.
>My sensual rolls break my fall, leftover barby sauce squirting out as I land.
>Mommie tries to run for the door
>she slips on the bar ba que that discharged from my store folds.
>Mommie's big dumb head hits coffeetable then floor
>"Mommie mommie"
>I poked mommie with saucey finger
>dumb cunt doesn't wake up, lying in barba quey sauce
> I must have spilled ketchup too
>Red sauce everywhere
>go to the freezer
>start shoving tendies into my folds to heat
>refuse to use oven like some useless mommie
>step over mommie and squeeze into stair chair.
>Stair chair whirls loudly
>Mommy still not up.
>roll back to computer
>my team lost while I was dealing with mommie
>fucking casuals
>looking at Jinx makes my tinkie feel spicy
>use my slippy sauce covered hand to make my tinkie feel extra spicy.
>tinke pukies on keyboard
>goes to the chan to find more pictures to make my tinkie spicey
>next day mommys still sleeping

bitch.

Attached: pepewater.png (657x527, 51K)

>Be me, 542 lbs of proud, big boned badass
>In my room playing Sonic Free Riders
>Tumbly gives out a rumbly
>Reach for another handful of Bugles but the bag is empty
>"It seems my food has been depleted. I guess that means some more is needed!"
>Engage my mommy pager device aka pounding on the wall with my strong thick big boy arm
>Let out a scrart (screech fart) to convey the urgency of the situation
>Mommy comes into the room, dark circles under her eyes
>"user it's 3:45 I have work at 5:00 and I only just got to-"
>"Cease your whining, vile whore. I'm out of snacks and I need more! Fix me tendies now, posthaste, or my vengeance you shall taste!"
>Brandish my katana and threaten to slice open a poo sack
>"That's not a katana user that's a wiffle ball bat"
>Whack!
>Mommy sighs and turns to leave when her nightgown snags on the dresser, jostling it and causing my Ayanami Rei figurine to tip over
>"o-oh user, your doll I'm sorry"
>"She's not a doll, and now you're through! I'll drown you til you rest in poo!"
>Get off the bed with a mighty roll
>Clutch my sword
>Take a deep breath and begin my charge to defend my lady's name
>I'm not closing the distance fast enough, mommy's getting up!
>Another scrart startles her enough to freeze her
>Grab the nearest poo bag and drop it on her back
>It doesn't break
>Time to show my full power
>"Attack my woman, you craven trollop?! Beware, your baby packs a wallop!"
>Bring my katana down on top of the bag, bursting it and covering mommy in my chocolate
>Mommy's cries and slips in the poo
>See Rei on the floor
>Combined with this alpha display, I'm pretty horny
>Start rubbing my willy now that mommy can't stop me
>She looks up in horror as I let a milky load rip all over her pathetic existence
>Lean on dresser for support
>It can't stand my high-test figure and breaks
>Splinters fly everywhere.
>My hide protects me but they slice mommy's necky-neck
>She stops moving
>Still hungry
I'm THIS close to calling child services

Attached: sadfaf.png (800x600, 71K)

vagina

>5AM
>bitch of a mother is being loud as hell
>why can't she leave me in peace doesn't she know 3-6AM are fappy and nappy time
>I hear a loud thump
>reeeeeeee this bitch she can't do anything right
>I reeee at her until she just says 'sorry hun-huns'
>that's it, I can't stand this bitch anymore
>I yell back at her
>'I don't want a sorry i demand 50 good boy points and i will kill the hamster if you don't do it'
>fag op mom better deliver
>All this yelling has really been strengthing my peepee
>I decide I will man up i am a man now and I will follow through
>I grab the hamster which mommy gave to me something about turning 30 and being a big boy and learning responsibility
>she doesn't understand i am still a growing boy
>look at hamster
>the hamster has a large poopyhole
>le big idea.jpeg
>I say to hamster odds fap evens sleep
>I slide my hard peepee all the way into the hamsters asshole, casuing it to instantly spray blood averywhere from being torn open
>I guess two and 5/8 inches is too much for anyone to handle
>Oh man this is almost as good as tendies
>start to edge so I pull out
>hard peepee drenched in blood and tiny entrails
>Suddenly my door opens
>I forget to reee and instead my peepee shoots googoo all over mommy's nice work clothing
>'mommy you bitch get back in the kitchen i need tendies'
>I see her just fall on her knees and start crying
>I reeeee as loud as I can until she gets back up and runs away from my room
>Great now I have to scoop the peepee googoo'd into my peepee poopoo googoo jar
>why do i still let her live in this house

Attached: a different kind of smug.png (477x539, 15K)

Attached: 1 (20).jpg (1273x1273, 362K)

Some of these are legitimately horrifying.

>Be me
>Mom isn't an alcoholic, depressed sack of misery
>Dad is still home, supporting his family, loving me, his son
>They both have a wonderful marriage
>I run down the stairs whenever dad gets home, he hugs me and kisses my mother on the cheek, telling me that he’ll go play basketball with me if I waited for him to go change out of his suit and tie
>I go help mom in the kitchen with dinner, the house is spotless
>I go outside a bit later, best game me and my dad have played yet
>Best friend joined in halfway, amazing point guard
>Friend goes home, I’ll see him in school on Monday
>Dad and I go eat dinner with mom
>We play a board game after dinner and watch a movie
>Get a bit tired, mom kisses me goodnight and both tell me they love me
>Room is sharp and cozy
>Bed is comfortable
>Shelves lined with books and action figures
>Lay in bed thinking about how great tomorrow is going to be

>BATTERY LOW/BATTERY LOW/BATTERY LOW

>Take off my VR headset
>The musk and foul stench of my piss bottles reeks, making my nose hair coil
>My body pillow is corroded and eaten through with my semen
>Shelves are lined with hentai and Japanese figurines scattered about
>Rotten, moldy pizza boxes on the floor, 2 liters are being used for my bathroom breaks
>Mom bangs on my door, slurs something then returns back downstairs
>Opens the door to a piece of bread on the carpet that says “Happy 31st birthday”
>Closes the door
>Hear a gunshot and a thud come from my mom’s room
>Sit back on my bed
>Plug in my headset
>Try to sleep until it’s charged again

Attached: 스크린샷_2016-06-16_오후_11.21.47.png (458x447, 127K)

>4 am
>happy tummy full of tendies
>be right in the middle of my 5 nights at freddy's session
>suddenly my pee pee feels funny and tickles from the inside
>"MOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMMYYYYYYY"
>she doesn't respond, she's been eating a lot of sleep-candies since when second daddy left (she promised she'll share with me soon enough yay! )
>i'm forced to waddle out of my 80 GBP gaming chair and go in her room while screaming "PEEEEEE PPEEEEEEEEEEEE FIZZY MUMMY HELP BABYYY GUU"
>the stress of this causes my belly to relax and I let out a steaming brown tendy-log in my XXL diapey - i'm mummys big baby boy, she always says that :)
>i plop down in her bed while she looks at me in horror and disgust
>"mummy my pee pee feels tickly, need pee pee funny dance"
> tears are falling on her cheeks, she closes her eyes and starts taking my diaper off
>the smell of fresh tendy-log and 2 days old diarrhea smeared on my hairy asscheeks makes her gag
> i let out a teehee while saying "mummy belly burp!"
>then, while sobbing, she grabs my pee pee stick and starts going up and down
>my smegma crusted foreskin hardly retreats while tear drops fall on my belly
>i let out my funny-happy milk on her hand "OOHUUHHHHHHU PEE PEE IS GLAD, I MADE IT FOR MUMMYY"
> "you're my special little baby boy, thank you for your gift to mommy" says her, while becoming red in face from happiness
>mummy grabs orange bottle from nightstand and rewards herself extra-helping of sleep candies, hehee she deserves it!
> i leave her room and the diaper on her bed and go back to my gaming session
> the next day she's still tired and sleeping on her bed
i wonder when she'll wake up, maybe she's preparing a surprise for babby boy gu? so many tendies and GBP await me for not waking her up!!

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Don't you know that's the best part? I'm screenshotting all of these

The following is completely true. Unlike the rest of you idiots I actually live the dream!

>29 years old
>In my play room
>Need to make poo
>Lean over my inflatable ottoman
>Put my toy dump truck between my legs and make a shipment.
>Poo-poo is a little runnier than usual, but it doesn't matter.
>*vroom-vroom*
>Now I'm hauling a fresh load across the country
>Mummy brings in my lunch (nachos. I like to change it up)
>"user, I told you not to play with your poo poo!"
>I'm getting real fucking tired of hearing this.
>Flip the plate of nachos into the wall
>Start punching my own head
>"user stop PLEASE STOP!" she screams
>You made me do this I say.
>She runs out of the room to get the tethers to tie my arms back and stop me hitting myself
>Stand behind the door and wait for her to come back.
>As soon as she runs back in I punch her directly in the face as hard as I can, making a weird, wet cracking sound.
>She falls over and hits her head on my dinosaur table.
>I go back to playing with my toy trucks and stuffed animals
>She wakes up a bit later
>I don't say anything, I just stare at her
>She quietly leaves the room, rubbing her fresh bruise
>I can hear her crying from her room.
>Am I worried? No. Regretful? Certainly not.
>I'll wait it out and things will go back to normal.
>It's easy for me to be a good boy.
>If Mummy does what I say I'll be a good little boy.

If she doesn't like it she should have had an abortion. She chose this life.

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>Lean over my inflatable ottoman
THATS RACIST, HOW DARE YOU KEEP AN OTTOMAN TURK AS A SLAVE. THE TURKS DID NOTHING WRONG

This one reminds my of the movie "A Serbian Film"

I jerk off to that movie every night

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OP is underage.

>wake up on the floor at 3pm from a rough night of erotic asphyxiation
>body is covered in piss, shit, puke and jizz
>I use mummies cum encrusted panties I stole to clean myself up
>end up just smearing shit all over
>MUMMY MUMMY REEEE
>hear mummy make her way up the stairs
>"whats wrong user?"
>as she walks into the room she slips on a stray cumrag
>as she falls over she smashes my prized Hachune Miku poop sculpture
>REEEEEEEEEEEEE
>I struggle to lift myself onto my feet for the first time in weeks
>my diaper leaks with weeks worth of digested tendies and a mixture of cum, piss, and disappointment
>I navigate my way to mummy through piles of garbage and shit
>a swarm of dormant flies rise out of the garbage and fill the room
>YOU'VE DONE IT THIS TIME MUMMY
>she struggles to pick herself up, slipping on piss and shit, "MUMMY IS SO SORRY SWEETIE PLEASE DON'T DO THIS"
>I remove my belt from around my neck and tie her leg to my bed
>YOU'RE NOT GOING ANYWHERE YOU COW BITCH
>I pick up my destroyed Hachune Miku sculpture and shove it in mummies screaming mouth
>she gurgles as she weeps and tries to ransom her life with promises of unlimited tendies
>after an hour long struggle mummy finally eats the entire statue
>I waddle back to my computer to continue on my path to reach my goal of 10,000 gameplay hours in CS:GO
>mummy sits on the floor in the fetal position weeping for the rest of the day
>finally untie mummy and tell her to get me tendies
>"s-sure h-honey"
>she disappears for a few hours
>waddle downstairs to see whats taking so fucking long on my god damn tendies
>mummy slit her wrists in the kitchen sink and then hung herself with curtain cords
who will make me tendies now? ;_;

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APOWAJISE

>If she doesn't like it she should have had an abortion. She chose this life.
Agreed! All our mothers used to be slutty normalfags bitches. We wouldn't have pity with them normally. Ironically the only reason we do pity them is because they forced us into existence, which is the same reason we should hate them even more

I'll make you tendies for i am hatsune miku and i want to give you head, and wipe your ass, and i'll bury your bitch moms corpse anyonde tryes to fuck with you and they will die instantly

APOWAJISE