"The champions of England,once again representing the Premier League in European Competition, can they bring the trophy back to England"
"And here we go, heavy pressing by the Premier League champions,pinning the opposition back into their own half"
>Opposing team gets fouled in the middle of the pitch, free kick
"And as you know in the Premier League, a mere foul like that would simply be waved off, indeed the Premier League is considered to be the most physical football league in the world"
>Free kick hits top bar
"Well taken,perhaps TOO well taken"
>Goalkeeper goes for a long pass,immediately gets picked up by the opposition centre half
"Tom Cromwell,6'6 is uhhh a big man, scores 10 goals last season on headers alone,you can only find such fine big men in the Premier League"
>Opposition passes the ball around and patiently waits for openings
"In the Premier League,every game is treated as a final and as with most finals,a good defense is seen as more important than a good att-
>Opposition midfielder shoots,deflects off the centre half and into the goal 0-1
"Well that was quite unlucky for them to suffer a deflection, you dont see that happen in the Premier League too often"
>Game restarts, Le Pacy Blackman gets the ball
"Tyrone Jefferson, an english native of London, very fast and very promising winger for the English National Team,notable for getting past fullbacks easily in the Premier League"
>Loses the ball
"Should've been a foul there I reckon"
Opposition passes from fullback to midfield to winger
>Gets a foul on the box,penalty
"Raja Khan Puinlu, another proud British native has never conceded a penalty in the Premier League"
>penalty scores 0-2
>Opposition happily hogs the ball and passes it around
"The opposition showing no respect to the Premier League champions,you dont see this type of dishonor in England
>Game ends, FINAL AGG SCORE 0-4
"It seems that luck isnt on the side of the Premier League Champions,the tough schedule has them not at 100%"
"The champions of England,once again representing the Premier League in European Competition...
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You forgot the part where Muhammad al-sarif drives a truck through a crowd of people
Only in the Premier League
good post, is this, dare i say it, the renaissance of Sup Forums?
now THIS is pod racing
fuck off paki chink
>puinlu
My sides
Quality post
GREAT POST
Read this in Peter Drury's voice
>Well taken,perhaps TOO well taken
Very accurate.
Good read
10/10
stop bullying england
Accurate, perhaps TOO accurate.
>Raja Khan Puinlu
You were doing so well. There have only ever been a handful of Indian descent players in the Premier League.
Gonna have to give ya a 4/10. Nice try but your knowledge clearly isn't deep enough to do this properly.
Expect this to show up on /r/soccer in the next couple of days.
try and handle the bantz a little better
it's a Paki, dumbass
>raja
>paki
Pick one, black man. There's been even less Pakistani players than Indian players in the Premier League. I can only think of one, Zesh Rehman, whereas there's been a few Indian players.
shut up bitch
sad
i thought brits were supposed to be able to handle banter
We are the kings of banter. We can handle good banter and dish it out in return. Bad banter though? Obviously I'm gonna call you stupid johnny foreigner cunts out on it.
Good banter should have a basis in reality.
How contrived
this thread should unironically be stickied
You're literally USA-tier right now, the only thing missing is you posting statistics and gloating about nuclear weapons.
We're the literal opposite of USA-tier. USA have zero banter because their banter never has any basis in reality.
American """humour"""
>take two random unrelated concepts
>put them together for no reason
>lol so randum
>this is now funny apparently
Our humour is GOAT.
FOY
excellent thread
>is making a funny post
>ruins it by resorting to paki jokes
honestly it spoiled the post because when have you ever seen an indian/pakistani player in the PL?
There have literally been like 5 in the Prem all-time. Michael Chopra, Neil Taylor and Zesh Rehman just off the top of my head. I don't think there are many more than that.
Amazing thread
Outstanding thread
apex thread la
well done sing-a-poor
GOAT Sup Forums moment here, lads.
Really makes you think.
Stop embarassing yourself faggot
>Raja Khan Puinlu
>Playing football not cricket
My autism can't accept this. Should have made more black jokes. The rest of it is accurate.
Samefag
>inb4 2 million years in html editor pic without (You)s
>implies a paki plays football
Bad thread
Are the +&×'s the new leafs in terms of shite banter abilities and abysmal posts?
>>Free kick hits top bar
"Well taken,perhaps TOO well taken"
MY side lel
>Tyrone Jefferson, london native
WeW
e
W
>Puinlu
>EPL
>actually fielding English players
Almost too accurate, OP, almost.
5-star thread
>This action was - as we say - a strawberry on top.
>B: Player after a hat-trick takes a ball home.
>H: Lewandowski took five of them after Wolfsburg.
>B: A penalty kick is not already a goal.
>H: On National Stadium it is.
>Romania squad is like a wounded animal during a hunt. It bites until it dies.
>Romania is like a wounded animal, and this you have to put down!
>When he leaped to take the shot, nobody knew the ball was already in the net.
>H: Zieliński will only get better, he is very young, just twenty.
>B: *silently* ...Three...
>H: Yes, just twenty-three years old.
>Łukasz Teodoryczyk had 30 goals this seasons and scored 5.
>There is a hierarchy among strikers... Lewandowski, Milik, Teodorczyk, Piszczek...
And of course:
>Who hears >Schalke anthem once, remembers it for the entire life... Many slogans, that Assauer introduced into Schalke... Ein mal Schalke, Immer Schalke, Ollo, Putschikovski ,Die Jungen Ausreisserinnen, Die kenninmale Leute von 1904... Every player had to know the anthem.
very good thread
berry gud
upvoted
Good thread
AMAZING post
>+&×'s
cringe
well done
he never said what year it was, bonglad
perro: OP
caca: butthurt britfag
>englards
WILL ENGLAND EVER RECOVER?
Premiere thread
literal 10/10
great pakistain BTFO
>cringe
embarrassing