Walk into cinema alone

>walk into cinema alone
>see this

wat do

those are stadium seats

and couples are banned at my local singles only theater so get fucked

Tag in

open fire

Does your singles only theater require your Facebook profile too? I don't have one so I'm SoL. Even if I made an account it wouldn't pass their test.

sit right next to the girl and breathe heavily

came here to post this desu

obviously not, you only need a Singles Fast Pass to get good seats and free popcorn when you wear your shirt

sit right next to them

if the cinema is alone how do I see that :^)

sit a few rows back and jack off under my raincoat, same thing I do during every outing.

That's stadium seating. I always sit in the third row up front, close to emergency exit easily jumpable over two rows in case of a shooter. Wouldnt even see them aside from looking up and doing a routine threat assessment. I guess I'd feel confident they won't shoot the place up and be happy its mostly empty and sit in my seat and hopefully enjoy the movie I paid to see.

>in case of a shooter
all my kekes

>sitting up front where you can't see the shooter come in

Whoa. Ho Ho. What are you two up to? ;^)))))

>Pirates jersey
>only 2 out of 16 visible seats occupied

c-checks out

Start masturbating onbnoxiously loud

Didn't know I can see myself. I would turn and laugh at the fat sperg in the pop culture t-shirt that just walked in.

This and
This.

You guys have a great stadium desu

tell the guy to stop strangling her and grab her boob

"Excuse me"
>*shuffle past them awkwary*

>"WHAT IS THIS? MAKE OUT HOUR? THIS IS A MOVIE MORONS, NOT A FUCKING LOVE IN, GTFO"
>laugh at them as they leave in embarrassment
>cinema all to myself, put my feet up and throw popcorn at my face because that's how I eat it

By standing in the row behind them and jizzing all over their heads.

Sit right next to the girlfriend and then ask her if her bf is a big guy.

He is for you

>walk into cinema
>posts stadium pic

American cinemas have cheap plastic seats?

Demand a refund.

filtered

Fart in their general direction

jerk the dude off

Not that much into guns so don't get triggered /k/ anons

damn, you're zany and fun! wow! so random!

>tfw i actually paid to see this man perform live

what a waste that was