Watch a cringy scene in a movie

>watch a cringy scene in a movie
>pause it and run around the house screaming

>Try to watch movie
>Unpause it
>Character says five words of dialogue
>Pause movie again to shitpost on Sup Forums

>trying to watch the latest capekino
>mom's sobbing downstairs drowns out the quippy dialogue

>awkward romance scene or scene where male character humiliates himself in front of a girl
>close eyes, cover ears and hum until the scene is over

>watch movie
>it becomes too boring
>change the language to something I do not speak
>try to understand what's being said

>watch lovemaking scene in a movie
>dig through my fleshlight pile to match what I think the woman feels like

>see a frogpost
>start flailing on the floor and beating my chest

>watch lovemaking scene in a movie
>dig through my flashlight pile to match what think the woman feels like

>download a movie from third-rate place
>start watching, 5 minutes of credits and intro visual buildup
>first sentence is some gibberish
>huh...
>continue to watch for a minute as the actors speak in some ukranian or spanish dialogue
>no language option or anything with said dialogue

>try to watch a movie
>get hungry every 10 minutes
>end up consuming 5600 calories before noon

-like

watch the movie with twice the speed and you would only have consumed 2800 calories

>immersed

How? I consume 850 calories in one day

I unironically do this.

I don't know, I'm just always hungry. Even when I'm full, I can always fit in another bag of chips or a slice of pizza, just for the taste of it.
>I consume 850 calories
Are you ethiopian?

You should really take up smoking

I unironically turn it off and come back days later when I've forgotten what was going on

thank you hungry skeleton

Balanced diet, less booze, less stress, more activity, no eating while doing other activities and chew slower.

Will it help? I wanted to try amphetamine but it's hard to find a dealer when you are a complete autist.

>Amerifats

>less booze
That's where you lost me

Imagine if the world turned into a dystopia where we were forced to eat x amount of food or be killed. We normal people wouldn't last long, compared to the americans, which would survive.

Frightening thought

I'm not american actually, and not even that fat.

>only Ameridumbs are left
RIP world, killed by pond scum

Sure you aren't, "John"