Whats his name Sup Forums

Whats his name Sup Forums

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Dan "10 year old boy best goy" Schneider

Dan 'Hymen Smasher' Schneider

Dan 'get into my candy van' Schneider

Stop calling him these names. Slander is a crime!

Poor little man, you dont even know where you are do you?

Yes I'm on the politically incorrect board, this has nothing to do with politics, zero, zip, zilch, nadda NOTHING at all!

Dan "hold her tighter she's a fighter" Schneider, we're just dedicating a fan thread to you. Don't worry.

Ok mr Paranoid personality disorder.

Dan "In the back of the trailer is where i'll assail her" Schneider.

don't get your jimmies rustled, eh

Dan "Big Dong @ Nick.com" Schneider

I'm not Dan
I don't appreciate these slanderous threads stop it it's a crime

HELLO FATSO

I'M Dan, thank you leafbro. ENOUGH of these threads people!! I'm sick and tired of you guys making assumptions about me and my female """coworkers""". Stop or I'll make you.....

awww what a cute pic! you seem really good with kids my daughter really really wants to meet you

HOLD ON
*shoots hockey puck*
HOLD ON EH
*drizzles syrup*
HOLD ON
*waits 10 years for chemo*
SO YOU ARE SAYING
*asks pronouns*
YOU ARE SAYING
*doesn't qualify for NHL playoffs*
SORRY
*visits the beer store*
YOU ARE SAYING
*extracts milk from bag*
WE
*buys car in Vermont*
WERE
*shitposts*
LEAFS AND SHIT

No you're not, you're just another troll trying to slander his name. Leave him alone he never did anything wrong

Dan "the Hymen Collider" Schneider

Dirty Dan the bun spoiler

Really now? hehehe, I would love to schedule a meet up. I'll fly her down, how's this evening sound? We'll make her famous.

STOP IT NOW

Dan "Work for me, need therapy" Schneider

Whatsa matter bitch boy? Wanna tussle with the man? I'll rip you apart just like that 7 year o-- just like the last guy who tried to stop Dan the Man Schneider

YOURE SLANDERING HIS NAME THIS IS A CRIME AND A VERY SERIOUS ONE! STOP IT NOW

That sounds great! she really wants to be a actor and she is a HUGE fan of yours. I'll contact you about the plane tickets.

whats the deal with this guy

He's a writer and the trolls here are trying to ruin his name because they're jealous of his success

Fantastic! What's her name? Cup size? Metrics? It's important for showbiz, please understand.
kiss my buns bitch boy

Some of you might remember Lori Beth Denberg, she was the fat chick from All That and Figure it Out. You know, the one that usually played loud and obnoxious characters. While she was an original cast member, she wasn't one of Dan Schneider's original picks. He had originally picked another girl to have that spot in the cast; a pretty, blond 11 year old. The girl's parents were reluctant to sign the contract to allow their daughter to be on the show, which was putting a hold on filming. Nickelodeon was getting really antsy about it though, but Schneider was dead set on having this girl (and "having" this girl). The studio eventually said enough is enough, and told him to forget about the girl. They instead insisted that because it was too late to start up auditions again, that he had to use Lori Beth, who pulled from the auditions they were doing for another show.

The thing about Dan "do cocaine off of that can" Schneider though, is that he couldn't forget about that little blond girl. He was so close to tappin' that, and it slipped out of his greasy sausage fingers. It pissed him off even more that he was saddled with that fat pig, Denberg. He remembered that and would take it out on her for her entire tenure at Nickelodeon. He would constantly write her the most annoying and unflattering characters, and generally treat her poorly while filming. That wasn't even the worst of it though, there was something far more sinister going on behind the scenes.

Hey Dan!

Dan "pedofile related joke" Schneider

Early on in the show's run, there was one sketch where Denberg was required to say a long list of items in a rapid fire manner. She kept flubbing the lines and laughing about it, which made Dan furious. He stopped filming for the afternoon and invited her, as well as Kenan and Kel to come to his office and rehearse in private. He offered the kids sodas, but had slipped roofies into Lori Beth's drink. Before long, she was out of it, passed out on Dan's couch. He then went over, spread her legs and signaled to the boys.

"Well, go ahead. She's all yours."

Kenan and Kel just looked confused.

"Jesus Christ, spit roast that white bitch! FUCK HER!"

Kel, raised in a strict christian home, was appalled by the idea. Kenan though, wasn't too popular with girls because of his weight and was all too willing to go along with it.

Schneider tried his best to bargain with Kel, saying that if he went along with his wishes, that he would make the kids stars. He'd get them their own show, movies, anything.

Kenan asked if he could get them on Saturday Night Live, of which Dan guaranteed.

Elated, Kenan then begged Kel "Come on, man! Let's split this bitch in two! Kel, however, still refused. As punishment, Schneider locked the door and made him watch in disgust as his friend went to town on the passed out girl, while Dan masturbated in the corner.

"Your going to regret this, son." the fat pervert said as he cleaned his dick with the girl's shirt. "Kenan here is going to be a star, and you'll be nothing. A washed up nobody who's lucky if he gets a role in a TV movie."

Dan "Si pasa la docena, me juego la condena" Schneider

you give a very "shilly" impression

Her name is Sophie i honestly have not done any measurements there but i think something is starting to bud.. hope you can work with that?

For the record, thanks to Schneider pulling some strings, Kenan did end up getting a role on Saturday Night Live, and has been on that show for years. Kel, on the other hand, can barely get any work, only landing roles in SyFy original movies. To this day, Schneider makes sure of that. While the two did have a movie and their own spin-off show, he tried his best to keep Kel out of it. He insisted that the kid was a one note actor and wasn't funny. Nickelodeon though, loved him and he was popular with audiences, so they made sure he stayed.

Nope. You're Dan.

>Hi dan.

DELETE THIS

I'm not Dan
Huh?

Alright I'm thinking a Nickelodeon special called Sophie 'n' Me, it's going to star your little girl and a wonderful young man named Trayvon. He's going to teach her about puberty, being the older boy and all. I will cameo.

Huh, that does not sound like something they would show over here.. but what do i know h-hah i will send her off tonight ill bring her something cute to wear.

>always a fucking leaf with the metashilling

just stop it's old

Dan "Holder her tighter; she's a biter" Schneider.

Dan "take your foot off and give it to me, I mean your shoe off.. I mean- No, I was right the first time" Schneider

>summerfag thread

just kill yourselves already

It's showbiz baby! Don't worry, what could go wrong?

how are you in every dan thread?

>not Dan "the Hymen Divider" Schneider

Roastie Wrecker

hahaha you are probably right im just a stupid sexist fucking white male i hope you have fun together! she already started packing :)

best one

Actually the "politics" are those of the entertainment industry and involve high up executives looking the other way at or actively obfuscating their top earners crimes against children. Seems like politics are very involved.

Also, fuck you, fag.

His name is Dan "i placed the plot holes inside her" Schneider.

Dan 'With shoes, you lose' Schneider

Dan did nothing wrong

fucking kek

Why are Canadians such shitheads most of the time.

EVERY

SINGLE

FUCKING

DAN

SCHNEIDER

THREAD

Has CANADIANS complaining about it. What the fuck???

It's CanaDan.

He wants to become a meme.

Underrated

Dan "Follower of Sunnah" Schneider

Even if that were true that would be a horrible horrible idea for him.

Check the catalog
Dan was never involved in that
No I don't, I just want to end this slander and for a while the mods agreed with me and deleted these threads

Well why are you even in Canada in the first place, Lucifer?

I work here

Dan "Roses are ran, violets are blyder, you hold her down I'll put it inside 'er" Shneider.

He's a paid shill

No I'm not

Dan "if it won't fit use spit" Schneider

Dan "get in the van" Schneider.