policies you wish your local would implement
>blanket day where they set the air to below freezing
>singles only night
>signal appears onscreen during boring dialogue to let the me+audience know now is a perfect time to piss or grab snacks as there is no action coming up
>fart swallowing/dampening seats
>free falcon valet
>no niggers
Daily reminder:
>negative zero
>mommy day
A mommy had to sit next to a male
It's cool that we all know you meant to put theatre too. humans are effing amazing
Posting in an epic thread
>policies you wish your local would implement
>your local would
delete this thread and start over you fuckign retard
>equip the ticket taker with a skin tone chart to refuse entry to any of the noisy savage races
kino day where they show actually good movies instead of just the latest ones
For real like just take one empty room and put on classics once a week. Seems like easy money wtf
mandatory intermissions
make everyone line up before the movie in order of height to decide the seating arrangement
manlet detected
blind date setup day
anyone single people of the same age over 18 are matched together to go out and see a movie together paid by the government to increase baby production
im so lonely ;_;
>no falcon day
STOP BRINGING YOUR FUCKING FALCONS I CANT HEAR THE MOVIE
smoking in the cinema
>no manlets policy
They serve food which is featured in the film whilst the film is playing ie the burger in Pulp Fiction, the bread in LotR
So how tall?
>he still hasn't learned
It's too late for you anyway
Can bring your cat along to sit in your lap
masturbation mondays
HE'S AN EAGLE YOU GOD DAMN COMMIE DON'T YOU FUCKING DARE TELL ME WHAT TO BRING TO A MOVIE IN THE LAND OF THE FREE YOU SON OF A BITCH I WILL KILL YOU I WILL FUCKING SHOOT YOU AND MY EAGLE WILL EAT YOUR GOD DAMN EYES
Fap Friday's :D
some smaller theatres do stuff like that, I watched Akira in theatres about a year ago, just gotta look out for strange places to go i guess
>the theater sound is just girls forcing awkward laughs after their dates make shitty jokes
taking the meme facade off for a moment, if you search around I guarantee you will find a place relatively close to your location that already does this. Hell, even your local big theatre probably does it and you just haven't noticed, next time you're there look around for things like this.
I saw Ferris Bueller's Day Off recently in a theatre, was pretty kewl.
My local Memebers only Art House Kinotorium had Nudist day once a month
It was pretty fun and a great way to watch some rare BW 35 mm prints of Sherlock Jr
I'd love to have my regular local theater do that once and a while for some big releases like rogue one
>i have never gone to a proper cinema, ever
Find a small meme cinema
>trash the theater day
just a day to take your anger out on the wagies and make as much a mess as possible. right now i have to be very careful not to get caught making a mess.
i like to make inventions and things in the toilets it gives me a good laugh imagining the poor wagie who has to clean it up.
pic related is my latest wacky contraption i call it the poop hammock.
food fight day
Giving out free crab legs to everyone who survives the designated shooter.
This is the least they could do.
Alamo Drafthouse cinemas do this for certain screenings, they will also crouch run your regular food/booze to you during the movie and you get a table to eat it from.
They also have an awesome cell phone policy (2 strikes out) and don't let latecomers in.
>He doesn't live within walking distance of an art-house cinema
Flyover detected
There's a theatre here that shows The Room on the last day of every month and has done kaiju marathons.
Another one often shows Blade Runner late at night.
You're not poop in the shower guy ):
Wank Wednesdays