Go to church tomorrow. Seriously. Go to church. At least try it. What's the worst that can happen?

Go to church tomorrow. Seriously. Go to church. At least try it. What's the worst that can happen?

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>What's the worst that can happen?

Scenaria A) I could start worshiping the StateOfUsraleTM

Scenaria B) I could start inviting boar peopel to Europe

I only worship Kek you heathen

I don't tend to believe in fairy tales, I'm not gonna make myself look like an idiot

Not today, Satan.

How about no

Well, I would miss my shift at work, for one.

You are all losers who refused to be saved. You made your choice.

You are Vatican scum anyway I don't give a shit about you.

I'm fat and afraid to go outside

>corruption
Last time I went the pastor kept shilling Israel. Does the nigger even read his bible?

>You are Vatican scum anyway I don't give a shit about you.

Im a protestant actually

Totally keep praising a god that answers no prayers does zero to help his followers and had a jew for a son

>What's the worst that can happen?

That I somehow end up worshipping Joseph's wife's son, thus feeding into the current cuckery in the world via meme magic.

>What's the worst that can happen?

Social interaction.

funny, I don't go to church but I do shop at publix and around these parts the church crowd always hits publix after service. I shave, dress nicely and go have a great hour shopping and talking to these people. they really are very nice but with my higher power I'm in church all the time.

Doesn't matter your country is on the list.

God isn't Superman. You don't pray to him for a million dollars and he gives it to you. This shows immaturity on your end read the Bible.

>some of you are alright. Don't go to church tomorrow

>Doesn't matter your country is on the list.

OK, but the whole USAlovesISRAEL thing started exclusivly out fo charismatic protestant churches, that is a problem that needs to be adressed

so you praise a all powerful ghost man that uses his "power" to create niggers make the (((jews))) his chosen people and allow muzzles to exist.an all powerful god with such a moral code wouldn't allow this to happen.stop deluding yourself

The fucktards running the church I go to decided it would be a good idea to bring in a bunch of the nigger youths from the neighborhood. At VBS the other day they had to call the police on one of them. And last Sunday one fell and broke its head.
So, that's the worst that could happen, there will be niggers doing nigger things.
And believing in magic is for children and old women.

>burning heart
That's the anti-christ you dumb faggot

The faith your country supports has a gay loving, divorce loving COMMIE Pope don't talk please. Thanks.

Read the bible

>What's the worst that can happen?
There's only one thing that can happen: I waste an hour listening to a dumbass ramble.
Nobody here actually believes in this shit, right?

I have you dumb cunt.old testament god was a cunt to everyone and new testament god is a pussy.keep turning the other cheek when you are getting fucked in the ass.

All of my local churches are now 95%+ Mestizo Mexican. I would not feel fellowship there.

The latter part if what you said is so fucking true.

All I see in the churches around me are old women and their grandchildren.

Also 40-60 year old male pastors/preachers who are just there to make a buck. They probably don't even believe in what they preach.

>he thinks the old testament is relevant
>he thinks the main theme of the new testament is to turn the other cheek

Read the Bible

>What's the worst that can happen?
The jews could activate their legion of muslim manchurian candidates to bomb and gun down every church across America on that day.

Just off the top of my head, there are anumber of other scenarios that are esentially the same just different ways of excuting. The kikes could go full blown and just use their drones and order all their shabbos puppets to bomb all the churches. Roll out their FEMA round up, etc etc.

So yeah I'm good on that.

are you retarded, trolling or just protestant?
>not knowing and loving the sacred heart of christ

>you will never be this delusional

Feels good man

so half of you holy book isn't relevant?
the theme of the the second testament is theme is to be a pussy

The old testament is irrelevant yes you can still read it but it matters naught.

>naught
nigger im out.you somehow have a larger fadora then me

>Also 40-60 year old male pastors/preachers who are just there to make a buck
I certainly don't have that problem, we've got a young couple just out of training college all bright eyed and bushy tailed, just like the last ones we had. But we used to have just several old people and a couple military families which was great but now it's a bunch of niggers. >he thinks the main theme of the new testament is to turn the other cheek
Then what is it? What parts did I miss that will tell me otherwise?

youtube.com/watch?v=_qr2vT5ySLA

Good and holy people whose spirit which is present in the body of their ordained priests take good haste to rape children and burn people alive.

We are better off in hell, where people praise somebody who we should not attract by using the word "god" alone, we must use special names, lest Satan, the only God, come over.

USA is the most corrupt country of all. They claim to be under God but are in truth slaves of Mammon, masonry and synagogue of Satan. They keep spreading all over world their filth which includes charismatic movement, prosperity theology and christian zionism. They will be among the first to fall to the beast.

Lmfao I live in the south, and around here you can stand in some places and have 3 churches in a stone's throw away from you.

There's probably more churches in the southeastern United States than there are Muslims.

Boredom for 2 hours. Plus there seems to be a trend of Marxism at churches near me.

>Sermon about how we should convert ISIS not bomb them.
Go to different church.
>Sermon about giving to the poor and about how it is more difficult for a camel to walk through a needle than a rich man go to heaven. 'now, good church people, do our elites live by Jesus word today?' 'N- no.'
Next.
>Sermon about giving money to Africa and shit.
No thanks.
>Sermon about guilt. How we're all guilty shitbags and we need more guilt. Guilt for everybody.
I don't believe in God anyways but when I grew up church was about Jesus and encouragement. It is now a soapbox for leftist cucks.

I waste my Sunday.

>all these unhappy fedora tippers and Christ cucks

The true religion is Jehovah's witnesses
The end times are near and you must leave you sinful lifestyle

The church by my house is nothing but a huge huge fancy coffee shop inside plus massiv3e potlucks every other week.

It's pretty fucking great. No dress code, girls are very pretty.

The downside is they have a live band that plays horrible christian rock music , about 10 songs each sunday w/ some bible talk in between.

Hey, it's not so bad I guess. It's all super casual.

Seriously, mate, what part should I be reading? Not the beatitudes, certainly and apparently not any of the red words at all.

It's so early and I'm usually hungover on Sundays.

Church is corrupt and obviously Satan has had his fun in there for some time now. I'm Catholic but will NOT attend church anymore.

My local church is populated by old Mexicans. The only reason I'd go is to meet a moral cutie.

Yeah, yeah, get the fuck off my front porch before I set my dog on you.

This is why I fucking love

Social interaction with delusional Christ cucks so I can find a Christian wife who I can control with religion

It's the ultimate form of women control

((( )))
Good goy! Be sure to be in your designated goypen at the designated time!
You wouldn't want to mess up (((G-d's plan))) would you? Heh heh

>"If you love Me, keep My commandments." (John 14:15)
>“For truly, I say to you, till heaven and earth pass away, not an iota, not a dot, will pass the law until all is accomplished. Whoever then relaxes one of the least of these commandments and teaches men so, shall be called least in the kingdom of heaven; but he who does them and teaches them shall be called great in the kingdom of heaven.” — Matthew 5:18-19
>“It is easier for Heaven and Earth to pass away than for the smallest part of the letter of the law to become invalid.” (Luke 16:17)
>“Do not think that I have come to abolish the law or the prophets. I have come not to abolish but to fulfill. Amen, I say to you, until heaven and earth pass away, not the smallest part or the smallest part of a letter will pass from the law, until all things have taken place.” (Matthew 5:17)
>“Did not Moses give you the law, and yet none of you keepeth the law” (John7:19)

Jesus says you shouldn't just dismiss the old testament.

Anyone who goes to Church is a cuck there is so many niggers there.

Good preachers just don't exist any more in my parts. It's nothing but middle-aged goobers talking about their family and referencing how bad they are at playing the guitar. Everyone's there either because it's what they're "supposed to do" or as a social gathering of aging people. No meditation on scripture, no theological questions, no self-observation, just bad home-brew Christian songs.

montana so no black people either

Just read the letters in red and your good to go

If there are more than 144000 of you, who goes to heaven and who doesn't?

Do you have some form of caste system internally?

That's kind of a bitch move atheist think of

>getting up before noon on a weekend

The local priest is literally a Nigerian anyway. All the Irish ones are dying off or in prison for being nonces.

Pffft implying god is real

Christfags are only good at being controlled. Man it's so easy to manipulate you guys.

I'm bored as fuck for several hours?

I went to a Jew thing once and it was coma inducing

>needs an imaginary friend to be happy

I go every single Sunday.

>It's the ultimate form of women control
>needing superstition to keep your woman in line
>as a social gathering of aging people
But that's what religion is for. The community coming together for activities. Used to be people understood that the pomp and circumstance and specifics of myths wasn't as important as community and family.

eбaть ты кyк

youre right i need to

requesting a christianity general thread

Why do so many black people go to church but still kill eachother?

Go to or and make one.

That's literally the point. Female sexuality must be controlled

>Mankind once did battle with one another in honorable close quarters combat.
>When he did not fight he farmed and as such he knew the value of work for each drop of sweat poured into the Earth brought forth his food.
>Even in this "Primitive" state Man knew of the love of family, the bonds of brotherhood, and the joys of making pointless merry.
>When he found himself at night facing the void that is existence he turned to his God who goes by many names.
>Even if his faith was misplaced it did not matter for he could be satisfied all his days till death freed him from his toils.
>Now Man with his great logic and knowledge of the natural laws has made it where he need not struggle as hard as he use to.
>And what does he have to show for it? Arguing whether or not one deserves to be compensated for the ill fate of being born.
>Living as Cronus in fear of his Son imbued with the power of lighting who will make him obsolete.
>We grew to hate the harvest, the sound and sight of steel meeting steel and blood mudding the Earth, and prostrating ourselves to God.
>We yearned for more, to move above our station.
>We wished to be as God and we were granted this wish.
>Now we must make choose what is good and evil, we must decide the fate that shall befall Man.
>And there is no one we can turn to when we fear we are making mistakes, no one to soothe us when we are faced with the eternal dark.
>Our hubris has cost us Grace.
There is no point user. We turned our back to God.
God is no beta orbiter.

we don't support cuckoldry here

Daran erinnern, dass Jesus Christus allein ist Herr über Deutschland
youtube.com/watch?v=BqWUZSNrVcE

You sound like a man who can't satisfy a woman.

Go to and make it yourself.

You sound like a cuck who let's his wife fuck other dudes on weekends

If you have the the need to control a woman's sexuality so she won't cheat on you, it sounds like you don't have what it takes to satisfy her.

aloha.net/~mikesch/heart.htm
>So the Roman Catholic Church did not invent the flaming Sacred Heart, but rather they apparently adopted the symbology from the human sacrifices practiced by pagan sun worshippers, and the worship of Baal is sun worship.

Sun symbolism is satanic, the "sacred heart" symbolizes the anti-christ.

>go to church
>be told to be lame

yeah no.

I work tonight. I'm a bartendie. I'm sorry but I'll be up too late selling the liquid jew to show up.

Besides, it's all baptist churches around here anyway. Maybe I should look into methodist churches.

i'm jewish lol

btw my dad (who is an international banker btw) says we will be funding for more immigration into germany. sorry guys. i also have majority stakes in all the major porn companies so i would not be welcome in church.

croatia is inferior to israel in every single way, slavcuck

Women will cheat on you regardless if you "satisfy" her. They get bored easily and want something new. Sounds like you let you woman control you. Sad.

If you can't control you women, you failed

>What's the worst that can happen?

A dirty heretic will preach love towards the rapefugees during the serrmon and tell me to vote for the liberals.

Romans 1 you need to repent

Nah, back in the day there was more to religion than a social gathering, it was a foundation upon which all schools of thought were perched such that they (within their own scope) could share a common language and gain a sense of focus. Sure, for most people it was just a social gathering, but that social gathering could never be maintained over all other social gatherings without the dedication of people who actually BELIEVED in the universality of good and the fundamental of morals. And great thoughts were progressed with those beliefs.

If you resign that those things do not exist within religion anymore then you have resigned to the death of religion.

I will today

They're having a Saint Sebastian festival where they give out chicken and fries

>A dirty heretic will preach love towards the rapefugees
What?

Go to a southern Baptist church, usually all white

Got to fix my car.

Hordes of croats will sit in Heaven with Abraham while israelis will be thrown in the outer darkness. Only those who believe in Christ are part of the Gods people.

Ahahahahah what the fuck?
go to church :DDDDDD
go to fucking church :DDD
literally, dude ahahahahah kill yourself lmao

>not Superman
dude, have YOU read the bible? I have back in the day. I suppose the parts his followers call him Almighty and Allknowing were just what... marketing hype?

11:00 is early

Only one at mine

Those are the saved post rapture.

The sermons in the catholic church are politicized, and the priests are either agent of the republicans or the socialists, and preach cuck values.

It is if you stay up all night drinking.

Why do you get drunk?

It's something to do.

But it's not good for you at all, I thought you nords were health nuts

Literally worshiping the Sun God on Sunday.

No thanks, Saturday is the Shabbat.

That sounds like a nice Sunday, user.

Well I'm a vegetarian and I try to keep healthy but I still want to drink. Feels good.

No wait that's not true. It feels awful most of the time. But at least it feels.