>Amy Schumer will play the title role in Barbie, the live-action Sony Pictures film based on the venerable Mattel toyline. The PG movie will begin production in the spring for a global summer 2018 tentpole bow, after Schumer puts her imprint on the Hillary Winston script, doing a rewrite with her sister Kim Caramele. Given her edgy stand-up comedy and her movie breakthrough writing and starring in the R-rated Trainwreck, what makes Schumer the right actress to play the embodiment of a beloved toyline that for years featured a doll with impossibly perfect physical proportions? Aside from the fact that she has Barbie hair, Schumer’s growing stature as a role model for female empowerment fits perfectly with how the film will exploit Barbie’s evolution into dolls of different sizes and shapes.
>Schumer will play a character who lives in Barbieland, among all of the various Barbie characters beloved by doll collectors (there are dolls covering over 180 careers). In a fish-out-of-water story reminiscent of films like Splash and Big, Schumer’s Barbie gets kicked out, basically because she’s not perfect enough, is a bit eccentric and doesn’t quite fit the mold. She then goes on an adventure in the real world and by the time she returns to Barbieland to save it, she has gained the realization that perfection comes on the inside, not the outside, and that the key to happiness is belief in one self, free of the obligation to adhere to some unattainable standard of perfection. Mattel, with a lot at stake since the toyline has generated $3 billion in sales, signed off on the take. deadline.com/2016/12/amy-schumer-barbie-movie-sony-pictures-mattel-1201863294/
i swear, if this somehow is true, and not a april fools or a prank, i am indeed, going to kill myself.
Jacob Cox
Fake and gay
Hunter Lopez
Women are funny Butters.
James Peterson
This
Ian Bailey
Listen up, "man".
Have you ever given thought about why you seemingly have to work harder on your physique and your skills, to attain us women? It's because most, if not all of the time, that's all you have to fall back on.
You complain, "wah wah wah, women want a man who looks like a Greek god, she won't settle for my flabby body, she wants someone who can offer financial stability" and the absolute most important factor is ALWAYS left out.
The size of your penis.
Imagine the disappointment on our face when we realise we're either (a) not going to get off at all, or (b) not going to get off but have to FAKE getting off, the moment you drop your trousers to reveal your laughable micro-penis. Imagine the despair we women feel as we have to settle for either a life filled with regret, or a life filled with lies as we find compatible sexual partners outside the relationship, who CAN get us off.
And you think being a man is tough. You weak-willed cretin.
P.S. the "average" penis size is about 3 inches too short.
Another blatant attempt at drumming up controversy.
We're all supposed to complain about Barbie being fat and the SJWs will argue about fat acceptance. This will go on for months until the film releases and flops.
Gabriel Green
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH
Holy shit leftists are deranged.
Carter Bailey
This, what the fuck
William Hernandez
At this point I am convinced there is an inside job to destroy their movie division so to let a rival can pick up Sony's movie rights for cheap
Luis Young
So is this a flick or is this a movie?
Tyler Howard
Isn't Barbie a kids franchise?
Are they trying to target older girls who remember playing with Barbie or some shit.
Daniel Watson
is Rick Moranis coming out of retirement to star in a new He-Man movie too???
Asher Foster
Acceptancekino
Aiden Jackson
>Black Annie >Cisbusters >Spider-OnlyWhiteMaleThere Why is Sony trying to destroy itself?
Gavin Russell
He-Man is being directed by McG btw
Bentley Harris
Barbie's always been a slut. But she's never been fat.
David Thompson
This has to be some sort of elaborate hoax. I honestly have no idea how a company can be run so ineffectively.
Camden Sanchez
...
Luis Ramirez
She isn't THE Barbie btw
>Schumer will play a character who lives in Barbieland, among all of the various Barbie characters beloved by collectors. In a fish out of water story reminiscent of films like Splash and Big, she gets kicked out, basically because she’s not perfect enough and is a bit eccentric. She then goes on an adventure in the real world and by the time she returns to Barbieland to save it, she has gained the realization that perfection comes on the inside, not the outside, and that the key to happiness is belief in one self, free of trying to adhere to some unattainable standard of perfection. Mattel, with a lot at stake since the toyline has generated $3 billion in sales, signed off on the take.
Charles Davis
dont be so slutty I guess and your giant vagina wont be giant.
Jace Murphy
>you lived to witness another Ghostbusters-tier shitshow Thanks 2016. Best year of my life.
Austin King
THE Barbie will no doubt learn a valuable lesson about the importance of being a fat slob.
Robert Gomez
What. What.What.
I'm as liberal as they come but what.
Brayden Miller
>doesn’t quite fit the mold Is that the latest polite way of saying fat as fuck.
Well, at least I know that I don't ever have to watch this movie.
Jordan Walker
>controversy I don't understand why they act like this is a good move. It didn't work with The Interview. It didn't work with Ghostbusters. How many more hundreds of millions of dollars do they have to lose before it sinks in?
Robert Ross
>Written by Diablo Cody
Oh, boy.
Cameron Edwards
I wish this was a copy pasta. The butthurt is so real it exceeds my caloric intake for the week.
Asher Torres
The Interview was funny
Oliver Wright
>Sony How the fuck are they ok with losing millions of millions on these hambeast projects? Surely someone like Kaz Hirai must've noticed their film department is leaking money like crazy? No?
Bentley Fisher
I can't believe a cis straight white blonde woman is playing Barbie in the year 2016, ugh
Aiden Gonzalez
Don't forget obese!
Robert Murphy
Based Sony Pictures for constantly supplying Sup Forums with shitposting material and keks
Elijah Kelly
Why is Sony the worst as doing this shit.
Aaron Clark
I thought Wreck it Ralph but sure I guess Lego Movie works too.
How does her comedy make a choice for this role though? They are directly transitioning girls from "Barbies no is perfect" to "im a fat slob buy me drinks muh vagina" Why would Mattel risk that chance at outrage?
Grayson Harris
>see ops post >wow, these fake news posts aren't even trying to seem real anymore >clink link >its real >mfw
Hunter Johnson
Does her obesity outweigh being cis?
Samuel Stewart
>Sony
WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH THEM
Seriously how can one company makes so many bad decisions in a row, I'm getting angry at this point
Hunter Edwards
>slut No, Barbie always got dat car and dat house from Ken. She's a whore. You have to keep your definitions straight. Sluts give it out for free. That's why it's a worse insult.
Zachary Green
>It didn't work with The Interview.
That created so much buzz more people seen it because it was "banned"
Landon Flores
I think Amy Schumer makes a great Barbie, in the sense that if Barbie were real her proportions mean she would collapse under her own weight.
Dominic Taylor
No user. This is where laughter begins.
Ian Lewis
>HEY KEN >WHAT? >MY VAGINA!
Jack Wright
>oh look, user put a lot of effort in his bait >even made a fake link >it's real what
Christian Martin
I liked it too, but not releasing in theaters had to have killed their profits. But I'm talking about them seeming to think making a huge controversy for every film is somehow a good marketing strategy that will insure good sales
Owen Evans
Sony is the funniest company on earth
They purposely produce stupid garbage and then feminists buy shares in their company to reward them
So even though they continually make a loss their share price remains stable
I fucking love this they're jewing women out of their retirement funds
Lincoln Cooper
I'm angry they're using their Playstation money for this shit. I would rather have more Japanese games than shitty feminist vanity projects.
Anthony Cox
in talks....fuck this better not happen. I can just see the body image backlash. The slut shaming. Just all this non-sense over an unsafe casting choice. Just get Emma Stone or Jaime Pressly or some other goofy blonde actress
Robert Jenkins
You bringing up Wreck it Ralph actually reminds me of how foul mouth jewess Sarah Silverman was a lead character but none of her personal quirks of her standup were in it, she was just voicing a character and did a good job of it too.
Tyler Hughes
Now THAT'S funny!
Austin Sullivan
...
Evan Brooks
Are you plebs seriously triggered by her casting in a fucking Barbie movie?
Pathetic.
Cooper White
>tfw Sonys playstation division is the only one that makes money
Evan Butler
curvy barbie?
Samuel Ross
>fish out of water
Whales are mammals.
Brody White
it is you fucking newfag
Jack Green
Sarah "you goys are being ridiculous" Silverman?
Thomas Long
Uncanny
Mason Scott
Pathetic.
Carson Torres
its like facebook and amazon and snapchat
you dont need to make a profit anymore
once you're a big brand that normies recognise they buy your stocks just because
Jaxson Harris
DUDE WEED LMAO WE DONT HAVE THIS PLANT IN BARBIELAND >american audience votes this funniest film of the decade
Jacob Edwards
I'm more triggered that they wanted to make a Barbie movie in the first place. But they made Jem, Transformers, GI Joe and fucking Lego, so it was only a matter of time.
Anthony Gonzalez
Im not even a shitlord but if I had kids I wouldn't want them looking up to that potty mouth. What if they seek other things she had been in online? That could create problems. What about Ashley Graham in a blonde wig? She is a much more positive role model for girls of all different shapes.
Samuel Cooper
>Sony Pictures
how are they still making movies
fucking ps4 owners keeping sony alive
Julian Mitchell
Anyone have the picture of her in the swimsuit, legs spread, looking up at the camera?
I want to fap.
Blake Turner
Guys I found a concept art of the movie
Brayden Powell
shut up cunt
Robert Bennett
>implying having positive role models for little girls isn't """"""problematic""""""
it's obvious (((they))) are trying to make women as crude and degenerate as possible. to the point where the concept of traditional femininity no longer exists. (because that would be sexist)
Lucas Watson
wasnt this fat cunt supposed to leave america after based trump won
Dylan Long
This can't possibly be a children's movie can it? That vulgar and downright disgusting excuse of a human being is a horrible, HORRIBLE, role model for girls. Or children of any gender. What the fuck is going on right now? How and why is this happening? Her entire career and existence revolves around being crude and slutty. Sorry "empowering". Never mind the fact she is shaped like an upright tapir and not at all like a barbie doll, her persona is what is boggling my mind. Why her? WHY ANONS
Ayden Gomez
so will a good fairy give her character a vagina at the end of the movie?
someone inside is trying to destroy them, but they aren't cynical enough for their ideas to fail
Daniel Barnes
She pulled the "it's a joke" card.
Hunter Green
Listen up, "woman".
Have you ever given thought about why you seemingly have to work harder on your physique and your appearance, to attain us men? It's because most, if not all of the time, that's all you have to fall back on.
You complain, "wah wah wah, men want a woman who looks like a Greek goddess, he won't settle for my flabby body, he wants someone who can offer big tits and a tight bod" and the absolute most important factor is ALWAYS left out.
The size of your vagina.
Imagine the disappointment on our face when we realize we're either (a) not going to get off at all, or (b) not going to get off but have to FAKE getting off, the moment you drop your trousers to reveal your laughable roast beef vagina. Imagine the despair we men feel as we have to settle for either a life filled with regret, or a life filled with lies as we find compatible sexual partners outside the relationship, who CAN get us off.
And you think being a woman is tough. You weak-willed cretin.
P.S. the "average" vagina size is about 3 inches too wide.
Dylan Johnson
Is Banter Hand the villain?
Blake Collins
W-why couldn't we just get life in the dream house:the movie like we got a lego movie from warner.
Carter Sanchez
Because diversity is our strength.
Bentley Jones
>TBA as Poop Daddy
Jacob Murphy
Mattel was super protective of Barbie for years. They had issues doing cartoons for a long time. It wasn't till toy story 2 came out they decided to explore making barbie more of a brand beyond toys.
Amy Schumer as Barbie goes against everything they've done to protect the character.
Aaron Hill
don't do it
Noah Allen
>Sony confirmed for learning nothing from their mistakes
Isaiah Phillips
>it didn't work with The Interview source? because I'm pretty sure it did. An incredible amount of people watched it just because of the controversy >Ghostbusters it fucking did. It was a shit movie and it still made a load of money thanks to controversies and the tumblr movements
Ryder Perez
JUST FUCK MY FILM DEPARTMENT UP FAMILIA!
Camden Price
They should have cast Nicki Minaj as Barbie. Not only would that drum up more controversy but there would people who'd actually want to watch; little girls who love twerking and nigger culture (aka all of the white and black girls) and men who want fap material.
And Ghostbusters made a lot of money but they didn't make a profit
Carson Peterson
subversive kike shit
Asher Martinez
>let's exploit the public's biggest weakness (vanity) by showing them just how beautiful it is to be ugly This would have worked better if they picked someone who isn't ugly on the outside and the inside. The only message that needs sending is that ugly women don't sell products. Also, fictional beauty should NEVER lower it's standards to match the disgusting average of real life. The entire point of glorifying beauty is that you glorify actual beautiful features, and people who aren't attractive just have to accept that and become more than a fuckdoll, i.e. a wallet or a respectable human being. But no, that would require actual effort.
Nathan Cruz
An inspired choice for the biggest slut in history.
