Claim your wand

Claim your wand
Dibs on Neville longbottom

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I cant find these in the bad dragon catalog??

Gimme the Bellatrix.

They all look like shit.

Doesn't the wand choose?

bellatrix

i don't want my wand to scream "I'M A FUCKING WAND" to anyone.

i read this is steves voice

lol dumblefaggot has anal beads

lel

I would never pick a wand from one of the dullest franchise in the history of movie franchises. Seriously each episode following the boy wizard and his pals from Hogwarts Academy as they fight assorted villains has been indistinguishable from the others. Aside from the gloomy imagery, the series’ only consistency has been its lack of excitement and ineffective use of special effects, all to make magic unmagical, to make action seem inert.

Perhaps the die was cast when Rowling vetoed the idea of Spielberg directing the series; she made sure the series would never be mistaken for a work of art that meant anything to anybody?just ridiculously profitable cross-promotion for her books. The Harry Potter series might be anti-Christian (or not), but it’s certainly the anti-James Bond series in its refusal of wonder, beauty and excitement. No one wants to face that fact. Now, thankfully, they no longer have to.

>a-at least the books were good though
"No!"
The writing is dreadful; the book was terrible. As I read, I noticed that every time a character went for a walk, the author wrote instead that the character "stretched his legs."

I began marking on the back of an envelope every time that phrase was repeated. I stopped only after I had marked the envelope several dozen times. I was incredulous. Rowling's mind is so governed by cliches and dead metaphors that she has no other style of writing. Later I read a lavish, loving review of Harry Potter by the same Stephen King. He wrote something to the effect of, "If these kids are reading Harry Potter at 11 or 12, then when they get older they will go on to read Stephen King." And he was quite right. He was not being ironic. When you read "Harry Potter" you are, in fact, trained to read Stephen King.

Voldemort has the sexiest

evrtime

Fleur and Narcissa are the only options. If you pick anything else you're a massive pleb

I love how you put in the effort to make this copypasta slightly related to each thread you post it in.

You love a shitposting baiter that does nothing but copy and paste his tired wall of text 24/7 in every slightly HP related thread like the nolifer autist he is?

May God have mercy on your soul.

Dumbledore's wand for obvious reasons

Damn it, man! Use the Clifford one!

You're muggle scum though so you can never have one. You'd have to take one

Krum

Movie wands a shit. Too long and gaudy designs (fucking metal and studs wtf?)

Book wands were just basic lengths of various wood, with almost no embellishment other than a thicker end for the handle. Also most wands were 12" or less, most people in the films have wands well over 14" which is silly.

>inb4 autism

archiveofourown.org/users/megamatt09/pseuds/megamatt09

Found the triggered millennial. Trumps win must have made you freak.

Bump

Start believing in Jesus Christ you degenerate commie. I just want to save your useless ass from eternal hellfire.

Movie wands are uniformly fucking retarded

oh lets make voldemorts wand look evil hurr durr

fleur is the only one that's both comfortable and easy to grip

have to tried them all?

You know what pisses me off about you. Never in your life have you taken responsibility for yourself. Problems with authority? It's a conspiracy. Can't make friends? Everyone sucks but you. Beat up by too many niggers? Time to use scientific racism to put yourself above them.

Geez, I do the last one to you. I can't respect you. You never admit you're wrong, you just play mental gymnastics. Your self-abzorbtion is ruining my character as well. I look down on you even though I shouldn't and it's turning me arrogant because your self-imposed retardation makes me think I'm better than you. And that's wrong.

What's even sadder is that you don't question authority, you just lick the boots of another authority that pretends to be rebellious. You spit out your party's policies positively verbatim and without doubt, like a slave.

The worst part of all, that's how you get away with it. You're hypocritical, you're a deceitful, and your narcissism is contagious. Congratulations, I admit defeat, asshole.

Dumbledore's looks like anal beads.

im not into dragon dildos

no thanks /tg/ rejected scum

Shitpaster attacks shitpaster with another shitpaste.

Sup Forums in a nutshell

Clifford is too obvious, and it's bright colors stand out too much. The Kanye addition is perfect though; some of his fans consider him some kind of genius, and it's almost believable that some deluded Kaynefag would include it.

Subtlety is key here

you think ginny ever used that shit as a dildo?

Magic is strictly forbidden by the Quran. Harry Potter should have his head removed.

Copypasta?

The books are pretty good, but written for young adults. Not everything has to be great to all people at all times in their life.

I was 11 when I started reading them and 18 when they stopped coming out. I definitely felt like I was slogging through that 7th one.

Death Eaters, Gonagall or Malfoys.

>oh lets make voldemorts wand look evil hurr durr

These are children's movies user, in case your retarded manchild ass didn't realize

It's unironically the best pasta ever. and harry potter DOES fucking suck

Somebody has a craving for the BBW it seems. How can white wands compete amirite?

>The books are pretty good
No they weren't
>but written for young adults
The children in the book grew up with you and thats it. The writing and everything else stayed childish and sophomoric throughout the whole thing

Did Voldemort modify that wand?

I want Snape's. Fucking fantastic.

Naw he's just a baller so naturally a pimped out wand was attracted to him.

>choosing someone else's wand

disgusting, get your own wand, plebs

What are you trying to compensate, user?

my manlet status obviously

10 inches is a typical white boi wand length.

>Unicorn hair
>Pine

>harry potter buys slaves

The wand chooses the nigger. It is not always clear why

Hermoine's is veined for her pleasure.

I'd use the Bellatrix.

Book 1: A young orphan finds out he's a wizard, and is invited to a school of magic to learn spells, potion brewing, and broomstick flying! But the evil wizard who made him an orphan is trying to come back to power, and Harry takes it upon himself to uncover the secrets of his plot and stop him!

Book 7: Hedwig the owl dies, then Mad-Eye Moody dies, then the minister for magic dies, then 800 pages of camping in the woods, then Peter Pettigrew dies, then Dobby the house elf dies of a knife wound, then Crabbe dies in a fire, then Fred Weasley dies, then Tonks, Lupin, Lavender Brown, and the annoying kid with a camera die, then Snape bleeds to death from his neck, then Harry dies but comes back to life(?), then Bellatrix Lestrange dies, then Voldemort dies.

sirius black