Fantastic Plotholes

>Repressing magic creates an obscurus
>Obscurials are almost always dead by age 10
>Take over in times of emotional duress
>Harry is abused and literally closeted until age 11 and doesn't create an obscurus

Why is Rowling such a hack?

Because he doesn't know he can into magic. Nothing to repress if you don't know what.

>tfw arachnophobia
>mfw starting the book as a kid and reading about him in the locked broom closet filled with spiders.

One of only few shitty aspects of the whole shit teir series, my main problem:

how is it that in the entire world of wizz there are only a handfull of real niggas and everyone else is too pussy to ever attemot to kill someone.

if theyve seen the modern technology of the human worl why are they still living like fucking pilgrams?

just a shit book and movie seriess for the children of the late 20th who would all become fedora tipping fags

The wizarding community is very very small relative to muggle population (3 schools in all of Europe). They also have a 'worse than death' penalty for murderers

>if theyve seen the modern technology of the human worl why are they still living like fucking pilgrams?

for everything muggels have there's a better version using magic.

Cars and planes? wizard have instant teleportation and brooms. Indoor plumbing? Wizards can just summon clean water and change it to any temperature they desire with two swings of t heir wand. Getting rid of waste and garbage? There's a spell that just removes anything that's considered trash, and if you're too lazy to even lift your want to pick up your garbage you have a magical slave race to do it for you.

There's really no reason any muggle should care even the least bit about muggle tech aside from knowing "if I see a gun, put up the shield that a 10 year old can put up that blocks all mundane projectiles" and "don't fuck with nukes"

Honestly what else did you expect from one of the dullest franchise in the history of movie franchises? Something actually worth reading or watching? No. Seriously each episode following the boy wizard and his pals from Hogwarts Academy as they fight assorted villains has been indistinguishable from the others. Aside from the gloomy imagery, the series’ only consistency has been its lack of excitement and ineffective use of special effects, all to make magic unmagical, to make action seem inert.

Perhaps the die was cast when Rowling vetoed the idea of Spielberg directing the series; she made sure the series would never be mistaken for a work of art that meant anything to anybody?just ridiculously profitable cross-promotion for her books. The Harry Potter series might be anti-Christian (or not), but it’s certainly the anti-James Bond series in its refusal of wonder, beauty and excitement. No one wants to face that fact. Now, thankfully, they no longer have to.

>a-at least the books were good though
"No!"
The writing is dreadful; the book was terrible. As I read, I noticed that every time a character went for a walk, the author wrote instead that the character "stretched his legs."

I began marking on the back of an envelope every time that phrase was repeated. I stopped only after I had marked the envelope several dozen times. I was incredulous. Rowling's mind is so governed by cliches and dead metaphors that she has no other style of writing. Later I read a lavish, loving review of Harry Potter by the same Stephen King. He wrote something to the effect of, "If these kids are reading Harry Potter at 11 or 12, then when they get older they will go on to read Stephen King." And he was quite right. He was not being ironic. When you read "Harry Potter" you are, in fact, trained to read Stephen King.

Harry DID create an obscurus, but it left his body when it found a more suitable host: Dudley.
This is why Dudley gets larger and nastier every year, the obscurus is growing inside him.

It is eventually unknowingly sucked out of his body by the dementor that tries to suck out his soul. This is why Dudley inexplicably survives the experience, and why he becomes thinner and friendlier in subsequent books.

Rowling has been playing chess all along while you're stuck playing checkers, kiddo.

Telephone? Just send an owl with a written letter.
Ballpoint pen? Just repeatedly dip a feather in some ink.

>harry needs to let dementors fuck with his aunt and uncle before they become not cunts

...

Ok im not talking about fucking cars although first off have u ever drivin one its dope as shit also sitting on a fucking stick sounds uncomf AF

But the internet, how are these magic fags still not streaming anime and porn, or using word instead of a typewriter, or just running up on bad guys with a damn glock and shooting bad guys in the face.

the whole universe is dumb as fuck.

wizards have access to instant communication, they just prefer the thoughtfulness of owls. It's pretty much like texting somebody instead of calling them up all the time.

As for quills, they have quills that last forever and will right by themselves as you dictate to them. Their quills are better than any muggle tech

I think flying thorough the air would be much more dope than driving could ever hope to be. The brooms have enchantments that make them more comfortable to sit on, this is mentioned specifically.

They don't need anime porn because they just summon a succubus to suck their dick when they're horny or use polyjuice on their pet cat to make it into a supermodel for the night

glocks/guns wouldn't work against a wizard because they have shield spells

why dont they fuckin use the death spell on the ppl trynna stop them

"Ok im not talking about fucking cars although first off have u ever drivin one its dope as shit also sitting on a fucking stick sounds uncomf AF

But the internet, how are these magic fags still not streaming anime and porn, or using word instead of a typewriter, or just running up on bad guys with a damn glock and shooting bad guys in the face.the whole universe is dumb as fuck."

this was @ u i was just to amazed by ur incompatence to reply

>hey don't need anime porn because they just summon a succubus to suck their dick when they're horny or use polyjuice on their pet cat to make it into a supermodel for the night

why tf are u trying to make all trhese wizzards tenticle fags and furrys. PROOF HARRYPOTTERISGAYAS FUCK

>Ballpoint pen? Just repeatedly dip a feather in some ink.
It's the ritual of calligraphy. They could infuse whatever shitty Bic ballpoint they find with magic ink but it's never gonna feel the same as thoughtfully inking your pen.

It's why some authors still use old-fashioned typewriters. It's maybe a little pretentious but it's still a feeling you can't replicate using Word or whatever.

pretty sure they could just enchant the typewriter to write whatever shit came into their head that reporter bitch has a quill that does all the work it even makes shit up for her she just has to ask dumb questions

this is why wizzard race and potterfags are inferior as shit. a beta race with beta stans.

>thoughtfully dipping your quill in the ink

>not just using an enchanted self-writing quill to do your homework for you while you jack off the Book of Erotic Spells that you snuck out of the forbidden section

>Gatsby that high
>Catch-22 that low
>Harry Potter, literal childrens books, even listed
This pic is trash.

What wizard sex shit is there I bet they do some weird stuff. Lmk quick bout 2 bust

The first two Harry Potter movies sucked as movies but the third had some good moments. I don't think I ever saw the fourth. Were they any good past that?

They all get railed by hagrid and his furry beast freinds and their giant cocks allll night in huge monster rape parties ;)

/thread

More importantly where's the realism? No sandniggers ever try to bomb hogwarts?

would you guys try to fuck a unicorn
i wonder how big of a thing that is in the wizarding world
i bet the pureblood families have foxhunt equivalents that are them all trying to catch and fuck a unicorn

>book of erotic spells

all you need is one, and it's one that harry can fully cast no problem

>mfw he probably spent 7th year balls deep in anyone he wanted

You see this is a series for children, not manchildren from a pedo board

The polyjuice potion is only for human transformation, remember?. You wouldn't want to create some kind of catgirl, would you?

>use spell to send house into it's own pocket universe
>rather then making wife or husband secret keeper, who would be perfectly safe while in the house
>instead make it a friend you risks being hunted and tortured for the secret
>don't even have friend make an oath to never reveal the secret

Listen mate I only read this book to tickle my fantasy of having intense sex with a shy wizard girl who never thinks about boning alright

>he watches for the plot
>he takes anything outside of the orginal books and movies as relevant

could probably abduct some qt muggle boi and bewitch his mind so he thinks you're his owner then give him cat ears and a tail with magic

if one were into such things of coruse

The forth was the worst but youll probably enjoy it. Then they got really good. Honestly just watch them all.

Book of Erotic Spells table of contents:
-How to give Polyjuice to your pet owl
-Summoning succubus
-How to fuck your Patronus (warning: advanced)
- Imperius Curse and Obliviate: a winning combination
- How to break in a house elf
-sperma ejaculate: the spell that just skips the middle man and makes you cum
-the timer turner: having fun by yourself
-Final page: enchanged porn moving picture gallery

fourth*

And then you could slide your cock into his tight hole if you catch my drift

U need to get laid

what is THE most powerful spell to cast in the potter universe?

reminds me of a doujin i found once where Harry abducts Malfoy and makes him his sex slave and the Minister for Magic turns up and says yeah ok whatevs just sign this and we'll be fine with this situation.

isn't the final page just a normal porn scene at that point?

shit man, you could make galleons as a wizard porn producer

Tricking the entire world into thinking they're watching/reading something good and setting literature back 100 years

using transfiguration to make a nuclear bomb

easier than it sounds, just make a large dense orb of pure uranium

damn son

Harry's magic actually showed up a few times throughout his childhood and schooling years. Because he was ignorant of his magical abilities though, he always chalked them up to weird coincidences or unexplained phenomena.

>setting literature back 100 years
Go read a book retard.

Sure, what post potter brain poison flavor of the month YA novel do you recommend?

You don't have to read that shit, user. Just get something that isn't on the bestsellers list. use your brain a little, it won't hurt.

>implying Harry repressed his magic

Why is OP such a hack?

He does do magic before attending Hogwarts, but it's not conscious. It's mentioned in book 1, where it lists some weird happenings around him.

>paper/parchment is super cheap to produce
>the moving magic pictures probably aren't that much more expensive
Holy shit user, you're onto something.