/tdf/ Stage 3 - Verviers / Longwy | Tour de France 2017

where the fuck is the thread, it already started edition

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>using pedals

bumpy

Dutch user who's bike got stolen.
Greentext story coming in, I fell asleep yesterday because I'm weak.

Sorry for those who waited.

This might be a day for the Belgiumbros: Gilbert or GvA.

...

me on the left with polka shirt

COMFY

Had to miss the first two stage. Any memes yet? also, who's /ourguy/ this year?

I miss the aussie

>Be on a scenic tour in the Dutch countryside 3/4 of the way between Utrecht and Amsterdam.
>Suddenly a mate calls me.
>Says he is on a tinder date and this slut he wants to shag brought her 16-year old friend with her.
>Tells me it's easy puss and I need to come over asap.
>Say I'm cycling home first to drop off my bike and shower.
>BRO CLUNGE IS LEAVING GET HERE NOW
>Sends pics showing two well fit girls
>Shift gears, up the cadence to Froome levels.
>Drop all the casual weekend dads with their fat bellies contoured by old Rabobank jerseys harder then Skeletor drops Columbians.
>Run into an H&M near the cafe with bike, buy a shirt, pants, shoes and a few bracelets.
>Proceed to run towards the nearest basic fit to shower.
>Cleats on bloody belgian block, dislocate ankles several times, look like a newborn horse running.
>Take bike inside basic fit dressing room, staff earns too little to care.
>Take shower, big swole bloke compliments my on my vasculairity, asks me the secret.
>Get dressed quickly, dry hair and rush to the cafe.
>Mate and said clunge still there.
>Ask if I can lock my Pinarello to his Vespa and the bike rack.
>Lock the fuck out of my pride and joy.
>Meanwhile my designated lady is already frothing at the gash, impressed by my cheekbones.
>Chat a while longer before taking them to dinner nearby, sneakily hold my hand on her muff.
>Girls say how they want to visit a hip place to spend they evening.
>Take a Uber to the Bloemenbar, fluffing up her flange on the entire route.
>Spend the entire evening in the smoking room ruining my lungs and feeling up her wet slit.
>My mate is full on grabbing his slut by the growler.
>I proceed to buff her beaver in full view of some stoned as fuck dude who proceeds to high-five me.
>Proceed to go to his place so we can fuck them silly.
>Fuck
>Wake up at ten or so.
>Say goodbye to the fanny & tits we plastered
>Walk towards the cafe
>Instead of the bike rack, my Pinarello and the Vespa there's two holes in the ground.

i guess you can say today is going to be a Long(wy) stage

the worst thing about seeing the start of stages is hearing people constantly say "it's nice to see the start of stages and see the battle to get in the groups".

tl;dr

Region free STREAM please guys
I'm at work

He was here on the first day

You missed Quintana attacking. Now you have to wait another three lifetimes for it to happen :^)

>Locked Pinarello together with a vespa to a bike rack in Amsterdam.
>Thieves took the entire rack with the bike and scooter.

The final climb

would love to take a piss with 160 other lads

>its a Chris talks about peeing while still cycling episode

is ass an athlete?

What I like about these early phases is that the guys in the breakaway are actually leading the whole race in real time.

Only Dutch ass is an athlete.

Vortex should be illegal or not ?

I'm glad someone screen-capped this

its permitted by commissaires....... I'd be more worried by the ped's team are sky are using rather than their skin-suits

we spa now

Should have been an immediate DQ.

Fucking cheater.

I fell for the Jew and just bought yurosportplayer subscription to watch the stages at work.

>16 year olds
jesus christ user

this is what you get for being a slave to your benis tbqh

enjoying ringo starr on itv4

>Leaving your expensive bike outside at night in Amsterdam
baka senpai

spa-francorchamps.be/en/webcam you can see them here.

El oh el- none of this happened. Bullies stole your huffy didn't they?

>8-wide into Raidillon

madmen

BLOO FLAAG

>shit bitrate
>only nordic languages
fell for it couple of years ago
never again
t. 1080p 50fps 13Mbps europort acestream

You can use a VPN to sign up for British Eurosport.

GOAT track

gib link

>having a job

Who is this fucking weapon on ITV4 commentary

Why do I have the suspicion you are British?

Impressive amount of slang.

that guy that used to be on brookside

they went to spa?

hello

yes, just left the track

Oi, it's legal here, also prime puss, since the upped the legal drinking age from 16 to 18 they have become way more lusty for older guys getting them in clubs/bars etc..
What else could I have done.
It did.
Spend a year in Bristol.

What happens here?

bonjour

Based nonce normalfag

rich people

tax avoidance, probably

lets caravan guis!!

I like having tons of money

don't worry it was a chinarello and the chick was 300 lbs

there is literally no excuse for having a job in July

...

Cycling >>> Fucking a whore in the red light district
Think with your brains not with your balls

>girl from that iPad Pro ad
brehs

>poo in it

agreed.

I've taken two weeks off work and im going to call in sick for a week.

Toying with the idea of developing "clinical depression" or a bad back so i can watch the vuelta

That's the motto of pasty beta Billy no-mates not living their lives in full because of it, you bloody bender.
If you are not listening to your cobblers chasing that fanny what's even the point in living?

jesus christ, matt smith can ask some inane questions

>sbs doing full stage coverage with what seems like no ads

This is absolutely based
and it makes me even more steamed about the bullshit giro deals

Anyone ever get sore testicles the day after cycling?

just asking

>watching itv over Eurosport

>going anywhere near carlton kirby

>watching eurosport

I bet you voted remain, traitor

Not appreciating the focking legend that is Carlton.

Based normalfag

Oh, Andy Schleck is commentating today. Cool.

Carlton is based, kys

I bought a seat with a ridge down the middle.

I'm always baffled by anyone who doesn't use one. It's as if they hate erections.

Have they gone through Spa-Francorchamps yet?

t. /f1/

gay

Yes

yes

nice

*finds the Eurosport vod*
about what time did they do it?

about 35min ago

1/2 hour ago

192k to go Sven

At around 1pm (GMT+1), iirc.

Make a webm of it please.

>Not getting a based FI'ZI:K Arione to slam your testicles back up in your abdomen.

Fucking casual.

Of the whole thing? I don't know if it will fit

Just whatever fits would be cool.

TWO CITIES

ONE ASS

>using your vacation days during the summer
>not saving them for the winter so you can take multiple weeks off and fly with your bike to somewhere with sun and warm weather
My colleagues always tell me to waste my vacation days during the summer and then wonder a few months later how I still have vacation days left and can fly south when they're left into polar night without any sunlight being all jealous. As an added bonus as everyone is off work in July I can get shit done much better.

...

nuke israel

A casual who will still be able to have sex in ten years.

just stop giving them money

I've got pic related.

it takes longer to break in than a brooks, but its thicker, weather resistant leather and has longer rails. hurt for 500 miles but now its moulded to my anatomy and inordinately large male member.

What emotion is he trying to convey?

>tfw no Nibali

>just as the leaders enter Raidillon
>camera cuts away

not impressive tbqh

the real reason why euros are pro immigration

so... out of 10 how fucked is wiggos reputation?

i'm going with a 7