/trans/ - The man who saved United edition

gossip:
>Chelsea are closing in on Monaco midfielder Tiemoue Bakayoko, 22, and he may sign in time to travel with his new team to China and Singapore on Monday. (Sky Sports)

Manchester United manager Jose Mourinho wants the club to make a £60m bid for Tottenham midfielder Eric Dier, 23. (Mirror)

>United are yet to meet Inter Milan's asking price for Croatian winger Ivan Perisic, 28, but a deal - for a fee of between £45m and £50m - is expected to be completed in the next week. (Independent)

United will not offer striker Zlatan Ibrahimovic, 35, a new contract despite allowing him to continue his recovery from knee surgery at their Carrington training base. (Star)

>Arsenal manager Arsene Wenger is determined to keep forward Alexis Sanchez, 28, who is yet to sign a new deal and is thought to want a move to Manchester City. (Independent)

The Gunners will compete with Liverpool and Manchester City for the signing of Southampton defender Virgil van Dijk, 26. (Sun)

>Chelsea are prioritising the signing of Real Madrid striker Alvaro Morata, 24, as it looks increasingly unlikely Spain forward Diego Costa, 28, will stay. (Guardian)

Roma are keen to sign Manchester United forward Anthony Martial, 21, on a season-long loan deal, but the Red Devils are unlikely to sanction it. (Mirror)

>Manchester City are one of four top European clubs ready to pay the £27m release clause in the contract of Real Sociedad centre-back Inigo Martinez, 26. (Marca, via Manchester Evening News)

Leicester City have agreed a deal in principle with Manchester City for the signing of striker Kelechi Iheanacho, 20. (Sky Sports)

>James Rodriguez wants his future sorted out quickly after being offered to some of Europe's top clubs, including Manchester United and Chelsea. Real Madrid are said to want £62m for the 25-year-old Colombia forward.(Mail)

Other urls found in this thread:

youtube.com/watch?v=cLE38KQuyjM
twitter.com/NSFWRedditVideo

It's not

*farts*

is he saving united by putting his 10mil agent fees back into the club? what a lad

Shit. Bakayoko have the same age as me. Where did everything go so wrong.

>martial out on loan

football is fucked

why didn't you become the new robinho, you stupid monkey.

Wow all the top clubs are signing highly rated players meanwhile Liverpool just signed some unknown 19 year old. Even Everton are having a bigger transfer window than them.

Cuck club with cuck fans

>spurs STILL haven't made a signing

getting worried desu

liverpool have won a fa cup and a champions league in the last decade

has your pitiful club? no, so shut the fuck up and sit down, cunt.

>a champions league in the last decade
>2005

what did he mean by this?

>his club is pitiful and he tries to talk shit about big clubs

what did he meme by this?

Which A-League team are you talking about? I don't follow

>he tried to insult a poster based on his flag

he's really scraping the bottom of the barrel lads

Why are you using British lexicon? Why are you following British leagues?
Remember when we populated Australia with our criminals? Those peeps were truly bottom of the barrell

...

>Never won the Premier league
>Slips away the only chance his club will ever get to win it
>Sell Suarez and replace him with Rickie Lambert
>Hire Klopp
>Lose league cup final
>Lose Europa league final
>n-next year is o-our year la!
>next year biggest rivals win the League cup and the Europa league

This does not fookin slip la's!!!

Any news on the gf to user situation?

>tfw you realise Rooney to Everton means he's going to play more and go to the WC as England captain at the end of the season

>pooney is going to ruin another international tournament
he must be stopped

pic related had it fucking all and ruined it over some nonsense. his channel will never be the same

what nonsense?

Some ol' bullshit.

Gerrard was actually pretty rapid there, probably the fastest he's ever ran

what did he do?

now that i think about it i may have exaggerated.
but anyway
>has successful vids consistently averaging 1-2 mill views
>starts uploading shitty 'crep' reviews
>video gets destroyed 1/10th of the views and 50% dislikes, disables comments
>next vid its the same shit. 1/20th of the views. disabled comments &likes
>clear display of his arrogance & stubbornness that hes shown in previous vids
there was no guarantee it was going to last, but hes killed the goose that laid the golden egg on his own

I've just discovered Chicken Conigguer is 23
legit thought he was 12

I don't like this guy

>being this obsessed over e-celebs

Sad!

He partially dresses like my dad who thinks that he's 19-20 years old again or some shit.

PAPER TALK

Chelsea are attempting to sign Pierre Emerick-Aubameyang, after missing out on Romelu Lukaku. (Daily Express)

Manchester City flop Wilfried Bony is wanted by French giants Marseille. (The Sun)

Arsenal have tabled an offer for Eintracht Frankfurt wonderkid Aymen Barkok. (Daily Star)

Manchester United are confident of completing a deal for Ivan Perisic, despite still being short of Inter's £50m asking price. (The Independent)

Arsenal are confident in seeing off interest from Liverpool, Manchester City and Chelsea to tie down Alex Oxlade-Chamberlain to a new deal. (Daily Mail)

Manchester United star Anthony Martial is wanted by Italian giants Roma on a season-long loan. (The Sun)

Tottenham defender Kevin Wimmer has revealed he wants to quit in search of regular first-team football elsewhere. (Daily Mirror)

Makaveli in this Killuminati, all through your body
The blow's like a twelve gauge shotty
Uhh, feel me!
And God said he should send his one begotten son
To lead the wild into the ways of the man
Follow me; eat my flesh, flesh and my flesh
Come with me, Hail Mary
Run quick see, what do we have here
Now, do you want to ride or die
La dadada, la la la la
I ain't a killer but don't push me
Revenge is like the sweetest joy next to gettin' p****
Picture paragraphs unloaded, wise words bein' quoted
Peeped the weakness int he rap game and sewed it
Bow down, pray to God hoping that he's listenin'
Seein' n****s comin' for me, to my diamonds, when they glistenin'
Now pay attention, rest in peace father
I'm a ghost in these killin' fields

If Rooney reignites his career at Everton, will bong fans be happy to have him back in the international squad?

they're not being raided, could be worse.

reminder Tupac is very much alive in Cuba

For me it's prime SMG.

youtube.com/watch?v=cLE38KQuyjM

For me, it's prime Eliza Dushku

Of course. The age of Rooney is not yet over.

It's just beginning

I liked Tru Calling 2bh. Repeating the day is always fun.

G A Z U M P E D
A
Z
U
M
P
E
D

for me, its________
is a thierry henry football analyst meme right?

>yank OP
worst /trans/ thread

Who /overflowingpissbottles/ here?

>ywn be this dog

Why was he wearing the mask against juventus?

*posts a webm that the women-are-whores autist can't stomach*

(see how I used stomach? I would really like that to become a meme)

That looks like it was ""leaked"" to the press by Chelsea so that they can say United got snubbed when they announce Bakayoko later today

>united will never win the league again in your lifetime


HAHAHAHAAHHAHAHHAHAH

...

Looks like you're going to die before the end of next May buddy

football starts tomorrow

cl qualies and a shit tonne of friendlies

Where are 1 through 7

What do agents even do and why do clubs worth millions let them fuck their ass?

7

I think they will get there before 2020

>mfw Liverpool has never EVER won the PL

>moyes
>60 (sixty) years

>There are people here who think a penalty merchant from a joke league will get more goals than Lukaku

too many wanna be bad boys flexing like they're so rowdy

Fuck, you guys CREATED the language can you stop ruining it like Americans and admittedly most Australian's too?

deck you, cunt. Think youre billy big bollocks I'll be waiting at the bridge at Keele services. Bring your boyfriend with you aswell

You're hard

Always cringey when people say this unironically. You are shitposting right?

With White Hart Lane closed for renovations, Tottenham Hotspur have had second thoughts about hosting matches at Wembley for a season and are thinking instead about taking a sabbatical from football. Untrustworthy sources say there is listless debate within the club about whether everyone should spend their gap year travelling the world as a squad or whether each individual should be allowed to go find himself in his own way. Dele Alli is rumoured to be keen on devoting several months to quiet contemplation in a Tibetan monastery while Vincent Janssen has his heart set on exploring Bouvet, an uninhabited subantarctic outpost considered to be the world’s remotest island, where penguins and petrels are left alone to breed and no one gives a hoot about dreadful goalscoring records.

Meanwhile, several clubs are banging on Spurs’ door in the hope that the “Closed for Business” sign is some kind of joke. Manchester United are banging loudest because Ed Woodward dare not face José Mourinho again without Eric Dier, says the Star, especially as Fabinho is now leaning towards staying at Monaco until Atlético Madrid are allowed to bring him in. But West Bromwich Albion are knocking on Spurs’ door, too, because they want to reintroduce Kevin Wimmer to competitive football. And then, of course, there’s Pep Guardiola, who doesn’t really do banging or knocking, so is instead working on a lace doily representation of Kyle Walker’s face, to be slipped under Spurs’ door as a reminder of Manchester City’s admiration for the full-back. It is hard to say, however, whether Spurs are aware of any of this, or even whether they are awake.

Meanwhile, at Old Trafford, Mourinho is sending Woodward regular reminders that the stopwatch is running and that, after Dier, someone from United has to hightail it over to Internazionale to wrap up a deal for the Croatian winger Ivan Perisic.

deck you, cunt. Think youre billy big bollocks I'll be waiting at Hull Marina. Bring your boyfriend with you aswell

Par, now I have to go blind

Wrap up a deal? “Now there’s an idea,” thought Antonio Conte wistfully but the manager may soon feel a lot more upbeat because Chelsea are on the brink of completing the transfer of Tiémoué Bakayoko. Granted they’ve been on the brink of that for several weeks now but there really could be movement soon, with several people supposedly in the know saying the midfielder does not, in fact, require a knee operation, so the deal can go right on ahead.

Virgil van Dijk is said to be still very keen on joining Liverpool but, having been chastised by Southampton, the club will not make another approach for him until the redness on their cheeks abates. Arsenal spy an opportunity and Arsène Wenger wants to make a move for the Dutchman. And in a further blow to Liverpool, Wenger is confident that Alex Oxlade-Chamberlain will stay at Arsenal after all. But Liverpool can have Mathieu Debuchy if they want him. The French full-back is available for free. Look up there! Is it a bird? No. Is it a plane? Yes, actually, and it’s trailing a banner saying WON’T SOMEONE PLEASE TAKE MATHIEU DEBUCHY?

Liverpool are interested in signing Leicester City’s Demarai Gray, who is also being eyed up by Everton. Manchester City have their sights set on the Real Sociedad centre-back Iñigo Martínez.

Newcastle United like the look of PSG’s out-of-favour goalkeeper Alphonse Areola. They are also chasing the Norwich City winger Jacob Murphy. And Rafael Benítez has also got it into his head that he can get something into the head of Jesús Navas.

read this as muswell hill you know was thinking you know my man ain't on my doorstep

>tfw be American on /trans/

Why are AmeriTrannies so much more retarded than EuroTrannies?

tldr

Why are some Spurs fan complaining about their team not signing anyone?
Do they really need anyone?
Their starting XI is extremely competitive and probably the second best in the league, and they have great depth pretty much anywhere outside upfront, and apparently no one is willing to leave.

>second best team in england
>did worse in cl than fucking arsenal
>won nothing
>half the squad is overrated shit/average players
'no'

>they have great depth pretty much anywhere outside upfront
Not good enough for a decent run in Europe

>Nolito trapped Cityzens purgatory

Pour me a drink

Am I sexy, /trans/?

poor doggo

They just had one very bad game against Leverkusen, anyone in England would have lost to Monaco, and playing at Wembley didn't help. Plus Kane was out and like I said, Spurs really need another good striker as Janssen isn't really decent enough.
If they are that bad, they wouldn't have 86 points in the league with a goal difference of 60, having only lost away against Liverpool, Chelsea, and sadly WHU.

>short
>bad hairline
>garfunkel hair
>fat
>thin arms
>cargo pants
>white
no.

>anyone in england would have lost to monaco
Fuck off m8

There was no team last year in England better than Monaco. They were literally the third best team and Europe.

THREE LINES ON A SHIRT

>going to City
heard it here first. He will have to give up his dogs though. Haram must come first

They lost to a Man City team with possibly the worst defence out of the top 6 English teams and then only went through on goal difference. Stop overrating a team that had a lucky path to the semis and overperformed

>anyone in England would have lost to Monaco

Still laughing.

>Basing how good a team is by their CL performance

Stop this meme immediately. I don't know how teams with blank cheques manages to do so well in the Champions Meme. Especially when they need to field full strength squads every week to make sure they get all 3 points against the might FC Sandcastle.

Man City are shit.

You seem upset, did he trigger you?

Not shitting on Monaco, but they only got past City because Pep decided to play 1 defensive midfielder in the 2nd leg when he needed to defend a 2 goal lead

Plus >we choked harder than I've ever seen us choke. De Bruyne unable to make a 5 yard pass

Wow lads, turns out if your club's owner is a bit tight and doesn't want to spend any money, you can borrow players from other clubs too!

Mad that.

cursed

>did he
You're the same person

So they're only shit because of the manager they currently have and would want to to lose?

>hull
Belong in league 2

Has Pep ever parked the bus?

>Chelsea are closing in on Monaco midfielder Tiemoue Bakayoko
Just how far away did they start from him??

2005 wasn't in the last decade you thick cunt