Eymet > Pau

Eymet > Pau
203,5km
The last sprint stage before going into the mountains.
Possible spoiler: lolkittelwins

Happenings of the last stage: chateau galore and absolutely nothing in peloton.
Marcel Kittel predictably won in dominating fashion.
Overall standings after Stage 10 in pic related.

Eh, I fucked up with thread name. Sorry, fellow anons.
Anyway, let's do another /comfy/ thread out of this snooze fest.

Shit OP desu. But with a little luck it'll keep the casuals out.

Coverage starts at 13:00.

>Pau again
>sprint stage again

anyway, can't believe how much this bingo has aged in 4 years

>another snoozefest

alps when

That stage profile is flatter than your girlfriends's tits

That stage profile is more flat than Brazil after 7-1

Why do the french crawl around on shop floors? They are looking for low prices

What does this stage and Richie Porte have in common? Both are broken

What do you call a french rider wearing the yellow jersey? Nobody knows, no one has ever seen one

How do you feel about Bouhanni being fined 100 Swiss Francs and getting 1 minute added to his total GC time for hitting Jack Bauer in the leadup to the sprint?

>implying anyone of us has a girlfriend

boring stage again
hope it gets windy near pau for some sexy bordering action
... even though this won't happen.

2 Pyrénées stages next, friend

what color is the jersey of the leader of the Tour of Norway ?

>tfw no flat tits gf

fun (?) fact : only one norvegian rider has ever worn the yellow jersey and it was thor hushovd, for the last time in 2011.

Voeckler and Gallopin have worn it since then.

If any non-Quickstep team works at the front today I'm going to go fucking nuts.

1 minute is nothing for a sprinter.

incoming get lads, ought to happen in /tdf/

>flat stage

*leads kittel to victory*

1 minute is useless for a sprinter. Also 100 FS is almost nothing for a rider who gets 1 million euros as annual income.

i think he's learned a valuable lesson

Fines are on the team anyway.

Good morning.
What did I miss so far?

Okay so we know that Fuglsang, Froome, Kittel and some others are in good form this year, but lets list all the riders that suck balls real hard. I'll start:
>Greipel
>Quintana
>Pinot
>Contador
>FDJ in general
>Chaves
>Kreuziger
>Rolland
>Tallansky

>pinot

1 minute? Jack Bauer has 24 hours.

Daily reminder that bouhanni missed last years tdf because he fractured a metacarpal while punching his drunk neighbour who was having a party.

Chavez has emotional problem. His close friend died in car crash just as Tour started. Team manager says poor fella cry himself to sleep every night.

How high will Kittel go?

At least 20 wins, I think.

some of them (Chaves - injury, Pinot, Rolland = Giro) we expected to be not so good.

Meintjes has been disappointing for me.

I wish he was DQed. Everybody hates that asshole. Always losing and saying it's because of someone else, always fighting with someone, well his name says it all.

Isn't he a former boxer? I thought he should be able to hit people without much trauma for himself.

no, a boxer wannabe desu

I wanted to see him and Demare get into some fisticuffs, seems funny to me that they are still ignoring the fact that Demare himself should have been penalized.

Guess it doesn't matter now that he tanked half his team out of the race.

Can anybody give me some greentext of anglos shitposting /tdf/?
It's for work.
Thank you.

First for Marion

attack attack attack EVERYONE

this is going to be a surprisingly good stage.

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hello

le Tour goes through my region today

through your vagina?

Rolland
Cummings

oh, you ;)

i'm so sorry

That's it everyone. Bend over for Marcel.

It's another Kittel stage

Not the way you should talk to a lady my dear.

It's a 3 man break episode again

Can they not

>Lotto already riding for Kittel

I just saw a docu about Argos-Shimano when Kittel was riding there. Itt was gud. This sport is so fucked up.

sounds exciting, they might not get caught until 5k to go

and people wonder why cycling is not interesting

>Just kill me now

Based Chris Anker

"it looks like the only chances the other teams have of winning would be Kittel crashing"

C O M F Y
O
M
F
Y

Morning, nothing

Its also nice that he just says it straight: There is little to no chance of side wind being a factor

I am genuinely quite angry.

Yeah, fuck Thomas Kristensens hype

Riis is also very good at killing Thomas Kristensen, when he asks dumb questions, or try to hype stuff just for the sake of it.

Oh my GOD another stage with no wind (possibility of tiny gusts that will have no effect) where the commentators are discussing every single chateux and ravine the helicopter can find. Cue the images of bovines and horses running and cut to the peloton doing nothing.

Meanwhile a three man breakaway forced by their arab sponsors pretend that they have a chance to win the stage. However due to a lack of interesting characters nobody cares, RIP Jens Voigt.

In homes all over Europe, people are turning on their screens to see their first images from the Tour. And this is what they are presented with, would you bother watching unless you knew the true potential of cycling? This boring, uneventful, sponsorgrabbing tourist shit is damaging to the sport

CHUTE D'ARNAUD DEMARE

why? is your gf pregnant and you are not the father?

on the other end it would be quite comfy to watch cycling with your wifes son

>Vermote

>This boring, uneventful, sponsorgrabbing tourist shit is damaging to the sport
it keeps it reserved to a small elite, perfect

It's moving wallpaper. And i like it. I can clean up my house while watching some comfy pictures of France. It's not a horse race. Deal with it.

Feel free to add.

Bardet said he's going to attack before the mountains stages

Replace Australia with America

But some americans are ok.
It's the ones that show up with 50km to go that fuck things up

>some americans are ok
delet

jesus fucking christ.
honestly, can anyone explain why getting lars bak into the break would be a worse tactic than having him ride with quickstep for the next 150km?

>But some americans are ok.
Maybe. But I don't know any annoying Aussie

Thanks bb

Bjarne Riis and Lars Seier Christensen(Big business dood from Denmark) are looking for investors to make a new Danish team. Hopefully ready in 2019 - World Tour

I guess you're right.

What if it's a daughter?

r8 my Continental Pro team

Also, need more iconic moments for this.

>Seyches

imaginez être le maire de Seyches
:DDD

Way better

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merdde :DDD

Why does Kittel look so much like an SS'er?

You need to post the final pic on the last stage, I need to save the final edition

I have said it before, but god I hate Brian "the snake" Nygaard.

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>using pedals

Because of >tfw no multihate gf?

Is your name really "/tdf/ Stage 11" ?

bouhanniloseslol

>le people turning an imaginary giant bicycle wheel meme

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>le Lot-et-Garrone, le verger de la France

L'un des départements les plus pauvres aussi
Et bizarrement pas d'insécurité, je croyais que c'était dû à la pauvreté
:^))))))))))

For a moment I bought into all the hype from the commentators yesterday that today would be all about breakaways.

nice fucking meme, no big break and not even wind or rain to make things interesting.

Gramps prolly was

polka dot jersey is such a meme
everyone knows vroome is the best climber but some literal who wins by getting in a break

should use timing chips on categorized climbs and the rider with the lowest total time wins

My dad met my mother near the cloister of this Church. Vive la France.

deus vult

tfw the break won't win

Which would make the yellow jersey and the Polka jersey basically the same

Aucun lien avec l'immigration.

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