Tell me your secret uncle, why are you always alone and never have a girlfriend?

>tell me your secret uncle, why are you always alone and never have a girlfriend?

how do you respond?

>There was a time above... a time before. There were perfect things... diamond absolutes. But things fall, things on Earth. And what falls... is fallen.

Was there a vagina on the plate?

It all started when I began baneposting around your age on a site called Sup Forums. This if course was when I would pretend to hate reddit in order to fit in, even though I had a tab open on the side.

Please tell me this is not actual dialogue from something that someone was paid to write.

My nieces honestly feel sorry for me at this point and don't bring it up anymore.

I think that just makes me more depressed, the oldest one fully realises I'm a loser now.

I don't have to explain shit to you pixel-eating freaks

i have some bad news

Nah I made that right now

I used to have a girlfriend. She was my fiance. Then she died in a car crash

now I just play vidya and watch movies all day

That's because one of you will be my wife someday

Sorry that happened.

But don't give up on love, I'm sure she would have wanted you to be happy, unless you already are.

Marry Kill Fuck

My condolences
F

Why is puddi puddi blurred out?

Ooooh you rike eggroll wit yello girr?

Because I hate people and I don't have the patience to pretend to care about what women have to say so I can get them to sleep with me.

Those girls looks half japanese half dutch.


FUCKIN HOW?

Uh, you don't get to bring friends.

>I'm waiting for you girls to turn 18

Because unlike your dad, I wasn't born with good looks. Now leave me alone, piss stains.

>hey, let's go check out your bedroom

This. Memes are my girlfriends