What went wrong?

What went wrong?

Promotion, I guess, because that movie was great.

The world. But it was always wrong.

We live in a reality where JC was a flop, where the Kino The Exorcist 2 is considered the worst sequel of all times, where capeshit has become the main focus of Hollywood, where more and more remakes are getting made each year. A world where the only way to make a movie is by using a dumbed down version of the Blake Snyder Formula. A world where creativity is gone from storytelling.

I feel like the old man yelling at clouds, except that the clouds are the portent of the flood created by an uncaring God that will bring the destruction of our very soul into effect.

>The Exorcist 2
>Good

The worst marketing disaster in the history of film. I don't know why though, I'm not American.

bland main characters

It released after avatar
/thread

Not good. Great.

Nothing. It's god-tier space kino

It was released just before Disney started paying off critics.

Also it just seemed bland too.

Nobody gives a fuck about John Carter in 21'st century.

Naming movie John Carter was a terrible idea.

Trailers were total shit.

It's a shame, I really wanted to see them go full pulp in later movies.

the name of the movie and the promotion for it

>John Carter of Mars sounds much better
>tfw the movie knew it's own problem

Marketing
It's a pretty good movie, I'd say on par with Pirates 1

Andrew Stanton probably told them over and over. What a sad end to his career.

Having mars in your title is a box office curse.

>JC was a huge flop
>Guardians of the Galaxy which, let's be honest, is an extremely similar movie rakes in over a billion
Really makes u thnk

How to market VS How to not market

rly made me thingk

>You will never live in the universe where JC had Mr. Blue Sky in the trailer and made billions

What about
>Martian

Fairly average adventure film

Got wrecked by critics for no reason

People didn't want to give it a chance.
Never met anyone who actually disliked it

Critics decided it was going to flop because of the director's choice of trailer music. There was literally no other reason.

terrible marketing
overly complicated and full of nonsense jargon shitting up a decent adventure flick

Taylor Kitsch is boxoffice poison.

They should've called it The Earthling

Disney turned Conan in Space into a pg-13 family movie, turned Deja Thoris into a bland Disney princess, and let a talentless ass pen the script.

The book is cool as fuck, filled with action and heroic shit.

Have you even watched the Exorcist 2? It's fucking terrible.

Garbage movie through and through. I think I only remember one or two scenes that weren't in the trailer.

Marketing
All the ads I saw for it made it seem like a very average movie at best, and terrible at worst
When I did finally watch, just because, I liked it quite a lot

Honestly the original story isn't that good. John Carter might be the biggest Mary Sue in all of fiction

>Tall, Handsome, Rich, Loved by everybody
>Transported to an alien world
>Right away kicks the shit out of aliens twice his size
>Alien princess falls in love with him instantly
>Becomes a general of an army
>fosters peace between two nations that have been fighting for ages
>Becomes a prince
>All of this happens in like 2 weeks

It's just not good writing to start with.

They must have run different ads here, because I only ever saw one ad with those airships on tv and decided to go see it in cinema

Yet when Godzilla does it, everyone chants his name.

Don't forget he tamed that dog alien and people hadn't tried doing that or some shit for millenia

I don't recall Godzilla becoming a prince or a general.

yeah, in the 90's

The Martian and the SpaceX hype have revitalized Mars as a money maker for movies.

>Entire race of aliens who are raised by assholes to be asshole to other assholes
>treat each other and everyone else like absolute shit, including their animals
Gee i can't imagine why a dumb animal raised by such a people would react well to being treated nicely

What if an alien came to earth and tried to make all of us cooperate

Not one fucking person in a thousand years thought about giving them bellyrubs? MARS HAD ITS CHANCE

we're not dogs mate

...

To them we might be

What if they did it smartly, like infiltrating our society and creating media tailored towards showing everyone living in harmony and shaming the opposition

To (((them))) you mean?

Terribly Amazing!

>turned Deja Thoris into a bland Disney princess

her outfit was pretty much like "Leia as Jabba's Slave" and that would have been fantastic.

Disney wanted a new Pirate of the Carribean trillogy so they cleaned it right up.

We would crucify him. We actually did that.

He chose a bad time, Israel in 4 B.C. had no mass-comunication

>it's so good it flopped, only patricians would appreciate it

This, basically. Instead of trumping it up as an adaption of the grandfather of all epic adventure stories, Disney did everything in it's power to make it look as derivative as possible. Then they abandoned it as soon as it hit theaters.

He was trying to give it to us through Mass.

Is Andrew Lloyd Webber not the greatest thing to happen to musical theater post-1960 if only because it's so hilarious to watch his unapologetically lite and silly Gilbert and Sullivan 2.0 musicals trigger hardcore broadway-fanbois with their financial success and lasting cultural relevance because those broadway fags are all obsessed with the idea that their little jewish dramatic form predicated upon people randomly breaking out into cutesy songs is somehow supposed to be "deep" and "meaningful" in order to tackle "real" issues

John Carter is less Mary Sue and more male power fantasy. The difference is that JC earns those things in the narrative, encounters hardship(however limited), and occasionally fails. As for his looks, he's not traditionally attractive by red Martian standards and wears clothes like some kind of savage.

A) Godzilla isn't a prince....HES THE KING OF MONSTERS

B) the movie where the government took Godzilla DNA and put it into soldiers to make an army of supermen. Later on when earth was being invaded Godzilla was given the promotion to general to lead the army of human/Godzilla hybrids

Fucking idiot

>B) the movie where the government took Godzilla DNA and put it into soldiers to make an army of supermen. Later on when earth was being invaded Godzilla was given the promotion to general to lead the army of human/Godzilla hybrids

If only Trey Parker could stop making terrible cartoons he might turn into a good contender.

Star Wars already ripped off this story so bad, there was nothing left. Drained the well. Stripped the flesh.

I could get behind that.

Anything, even fucking Disney adaptations, would beat all this fucking Hamilton circle-jerking.

Me, my dream is to adapt Journey's classic Steve Perry-era song catalogue into a Mamma Mia-styled anthology musical with a South Pacific-esque "love over distance in a time of [fairly happy] war" story set against a Starship Troopers-styled sci-fi backdrop inspired by late 70's album art and van paintings

The first hour of the movie.

Excuse me, but how could "the grandfather of all epic adventure stories" not come off as "derivative as possible?" Unless john carter is literally the first move you've ever seen, you've seen everything in it done better by worse movies.

Also channing tatum is horrible in every way shape and form.

It looked like tarzan in space. There are even space apes on that poser.

what does channing tatum has to do with anything
taylor kitsch played john carter
channing tatum is not even that bad

Tarzan is probably the only still-relevant media piece that's actually older than JCgtM

Anyway this movie so many people got blacklisted from show business. Andrew Stanton had his career ruined and didn't get to make a movie until finding dory, the lady in charge of marketing probably had her firstborn killed

I liked the movie except for some of the ship designs

HES SO BAD I CAN'T EVEN REMEMBER HIS NAME

and neither could you.

Its funny to mention tarzan in a john carter thread. As both are edgar rice burroughs. Not to mention princess of mars is, essentially, tarzan goes to mars.

>the lady in charge of marketing probably had her firstborn killed
you're joking but they actually do that

>and neither could you
but i did, i didn't google or anything
i wouldn't call him bad, maybe just bland
also i think people here liked him in that friday night lights tv show

What went right! My boys right here, filled me with intense nostalgia for Rome.

friday night lights was a show about teenaged ennui (oh god all this pussy, fun, and seeming purpose in life, but what does it mean this is so hard!!) in which kitch's only facial expression pretty accurately displayed that perfect look of "holy shit last night was great but I don't think I can do it again." A look that does not fit at all with "tarzan goes to mars and becomes a literal god."

Should have been R rated, red women are supposed to have tits out at all times

Didn't explain enough about the lore, the Therns, the great white apes, why the world is ruined, the other races (there are some black pirates that raid the other races and people think they come from the moons

GoG had 80s pop culture references and soundtrack.
JC is about turn a century old literrary genre.

Guess which one hit the audience's nostalgia buttons.

>the great white apes

Triggering both blacks and whites, I like it.

Maybe literature will have a resurgence in popularity just as comic books did?

Or did Harry Potter already burn the whole candle?

i liked it

It was alright. I don't blame people for not seeing it.

marketing i think because i really liked this movie