Kevin Smith Rouge One Review

The moment we have all been waiting for has finally arrived. Kevin Smith reviews rouge one
youtube.com/watch?v=uLljgEUPmRQ

Other urls found in this thread:

theguardian.com/film/2010/feb/15/overweight-filmmaker-banned-southwest-airlines
youtube.com/watch?v=Kj08Jwp-2q0
twitter.com/SFWRedditImages

There's something about Kevin Smith and his fans I sincerely despise. Can't put my finger on it, unfortunately.

Did he cry?

that looks like a man who cried tears of joy while watching it

I bet it made him feel like he was a child again

I can't trust his review. He hated BvS and loved Suicide Squad. He loved Episode I and TFA. He's a retard that said Luke Cage is the best Marvel show.

He has fans?

What a fag. He got stormtroopers and swings and Vader and the death star and the emperor last year. The differences are unnoticeable.

man wtf happed to smith? was he always like this?

Literally who?

In all seriousness though Kevin Smith should stick to what he knows best: shitty dick jokes and taking up two seats on a plane because he's morbidly obese. After I saw the abortion that was Red State I knew he had overstayed his welcome in the film business.

Article related: theguardian.com/film/2010/feb/15/overweight-filmmaker-banned-southwest-airlines

i used to be a huge fan, once you get the gist of his character you drop him immediately. i've read his books, watched his live Q&A's etc. they're fun, he's a funny guy and a great story teller. He's just incredibly insecure to the point where it's annoying. the fucking self deprecation 24/7. He can't say anything remotely serious without following it up with "well this is coming from the fat guy who made *insert one of his bombs here* LOL". It's got to have something to do with growing up fat, but the constant "lol i don't actually taking anything seriously" bullshit has gone on far too long. Own up to your shit, Kev. stop being such a pussy.

>Rouge

>2010

he didn't look as morbidly obese as he used to on that joe rogan podcast recently

Why bother watching this shit review? You already know exactly what he'll say. He's more predictable than Joe Rogan.

>He's a retard that said Luke Cage is the best Marvel show.

But it clearly is. Oh wait, it's got black people in it so ofc Sup Forums has to hate it. Stay salty,

>Review
>1:37:01

Is the review supposed to be as long as the movie

Clearly. Just look at those rosy cheeks

he is a spoiled idiot trying to look working class

his fans are the same

they are just plane fake people

I don't even have to watch this to know he think it's the best movie of all time with absolutely not flaw like the big corporate cunt he is.

No Kevin, Disney won't let you direct any star wars movie no matter how much ass licking you do

When will he grow up and stop dressing like such a fag

What happened man, he was fine up til Clerks 2, I think it went down hill from there, although I did find Tusk to be funny for the concept, although the jokes went on too long with Johnny Depp's character.

Nope it's just a poorly made show, false flagger.

they are a special subspecies of nerd, the dirtbag nerd, who is an alcoholic/smoker/pothead and either didn't finish college or never attended. they try to be salty, abrasive, and disgusting like an '80s HBO stand-up special comedian but their fixations are comic books and star wars. they were mostly a Gen X phenomenon, supplanted by the feminized nu-males of today.

Zack and Miri being a flop and then Cop Out soon after seemed to fuck with him.

you can't trust kevin when it comes to this shit. he literally always says he loves everything in "nerd culture" he did originally say he didn't really care for bvs but he had to come up with some dumb excuse and said it changed after he saw it again. every marvel movie comes out, he'll more than likely say it's the best one they've made

yeah... what part of this video is the actual review?

Is there like a ten minute section somewhere in here I'm supposed to skip to?

he gave a semi-negative review to BvS, but then took it back less than a week later.

Still at least he disliked ONE thing, he seems to love everything which seems fake/dishonest

>TFW you're a dirtbag nerd and just missed out on being a feminized nu-male which would at least be happy

Life is suffering. I'm not even an alpha dirtbag nerd since I don't enjoy trinkets like Kevin Smith does. My family keeps asking me what I want for Christmas and I can't give an answer because there's nothing I want so I'll just get socks and whiskey and feel sad about it.

God damn you Kevin Smith! IF I WAS BORN LATER I COULD ASK FOR HAIR GEL OR SOMETHING I DON'T KNOW

>but then took it back less than a week later.
Not really. He's really passive aggressive with his "endorsement" for the movie. Even now when he brings the movie up it's always so he can piss on it without making Bugs Bunny too angry.

>he is a spoiled idiot trying to look working class
Wrong
>his fans are the same
you sound bitter
>they are just plane fake people
>plane

Who are the worst of these media blogger types?

That Devin Faraci guy sexually assaulted multiple women, Jordan Hoffman wrote multiple articles about shtting his own pants, the guy from aintitcool is so fat he's wheelchair bound.

they're all disgusting creatures, who then go online and pretend they are morally superior to other by latching onto the SJW 'bandwagon',

they should all be executed.

Is he crying constantly?

>He's a retard that said Luke Cage is the best Marvel show.
But it is. It's atmospheric as fuck.

He's not a Sup Forums poster so I doubt it.

>missed out on being a feminized nu-male which would at least be happy

i don't believe they're happy. their preferred hobby is videogames and that's narcotizing them and making them docile in their 20's, but when these people get into middle age it's gonna be fucking ugly.

think of every nu-male you know who got a few years into a marriage or had children. jake rapp, anthony burch... their lives are unending horror.

But Ralph Garmin is cool

He also said he loved BvS. I have no clue what he thought about it.

they're fat miserable idiots, thats why they cry all the time and blog about being SJW they are departed for female companionship and the ones that get female companionship are cucked hard like Ralphie May.

He's the definition of a manchild.

kek

o a side note, what part of this 90 minute long video is the review?

>caring about anything this fat shit hack thinks

Yoga Hosers made me lose any respect for this fat fuck.

Without a doubt the worst movie I've seen this decade and I saw Movie 43 in theaters

Hey, at least your opinions aren't dictated by what some bubble-headed idiot said on Twitter. You can take comfort in that.

>Is he crying constantly?
kevin universe

Is this sponsored content?

>great storyteller

No.

He's right though. If you were working class you wouldn't of attacked his spelling.

The party.

Fuck this guy. Why do people care what he has to say? Seriously...

>stop liking what i don't like ;_;

>and a great story teller
He's a remarkably average story teller compared to most people I know personally. Not terrible by any metric, but in no way exceptional, either.

And for a screenwriter, that's inexcusable.

I bet you have to wait in line for an hour to get a drink of alcohol. Who would want to talk to these miserable pricks anyways? Do they just get off on The Mouse throwing them a stale bone?

I don't care what he has to say. He's shown on every occasion that he is incapable of being impartial about this sort of stuff.

Rouge One could have been 2 hours worth of footage of a dog turd steaming on the sidewalk and he'd still cry over it.

Look kid, 20 years ago we all thought he was a groundbreaking indie director who took risks.

And then he made Jersey Girl. And Zack and Miri. And Tusk. And Yoga Hosers.

I do not give fuck one about his podcasts, his comic book store, his family, or any other ancillary bullshit. And his contribution to comics is on par with Max Landis's: LOOK AT ME garbage almost universally despised.

He got lucky, squandered his good will making 90s trash and hasn't left it.

Weed. Weed ruined Kevin. What happened is during Zach and Miri Make a Porno he noticed that Seth Rogen was constantly smoking pot on set. Kevin thought the weed made Seth more creative so he started blazing it on set and he has been doing it ever since. Kevin has always been a pothead but he used to be smart enough to know that to direct a movie you need to be focused, now he smokes his way through making movies and as a result his direction and writing has gotten significantly worse.

For someone that doesn't 'give fuck one' about him, you sure seem salty.

Maybe find another thread.

>kid
I'm older than you, I know that for sure.

I like Kevin Smith. I like his movies and his stories during his live events. He is a good storyteller.

But about 2 years ago I just sort of realized he is 100% positive with everything. He doesn't dislike anything except a few people who were directly mean to him. Like Bruce Willis.

I just can't take is love of all things. In real life some things suck. Everything isn't good.

Every time the nigger says something on his show he smiles and says give this man a million dollars what a great idea! like the guy is retarded and he's trying to be nice.

Also every time he says something along the lines of, "You guys are gonna freak! Oh and girls. Girls will too, I didn't forget you." and shit like he's always trying to be inclusive to the point where he mangles old sayings and phrases to mix in women and gays.

He cut sugar out of his diet and lost a ton of weight.

So-called 'Social Justice' is a cancer destroying society

>I'm older than you, I know that for sure.
I was born the day Cool Hand Luke premiered. I remember Nixon.

If you *are* older than me, good for you.

Who the fuck is Kevin Smith? Sup Forums's official critic?

He played Quiet Bill in Cashiers.

Christ. why are you here? You're almost my dads age.

Also, for people asking. Review starts around 15-ish minutes in and goes for like thirty minutes

sort-of the opposite, he is pure SJW. I think maybe Bill Burr would be the Sup Forumsest critic.

>Who the fuck is Kevin Smith?
Believable bait.
>Sup Forums's official critic?
This is where you fucked up. There's no reason whatsoever to bring up Sup Forums in a fucking Kevin Smith thread. He has never said anything that's Sup Forumsish.

the whole thing is the review, basically spoilers the entire movie, hence the title of the video

its starts about 6 minutes in after the sponsor

>I like Kevin Smith
>I like his movies
Get out.

Chasing Amy is a great fucking movie...
Clerks 1 and 2, dogma, Jasbsb, Dogma, zammap and red state are all solid to great

>Christ. why are you here?
I'm addicted to trash and at this point even Sup Forums's more civilized.

>The moment we have all been waiting for has finally arrived.
thats not plinkett

i mean himself, onstage with a mic, not as a writer.

i personally like having people here that are not just in their 20s

he is not a great story teller he is just a profesional shit talker

Not that user but...
>wouldn't of
>of

His TFA review was weak.

>"It's Empire Strikes Back good"

What went so wrong in his life that he's spewing such extreme hyperbolic garbage?

>thinking you can ever leave
(You) you again in a decade, user!

I love Kevin Smith. I admit he got soft, but he's still cool. He's like a cool uncle or older brother I never had.

I will never watch a video of him again after I had to listen to him describe having his dick sucked while listening to Prince

His tv/film opinions seem so dishonest and overly positive. Maybe that's just because he's in that world
and he doesnt want to run down his peers. Or maybe he's afraid of having criticisms turned back on him.
Either way, his reviews are worthless because all he does is ball wash.

a free shill looking to get more TV opportunity with anyone, even Disney/abc

>his peers

>he hosts a neckbeard gathering show for a living

>Waiting for some fat slavic faggot to suck Disney's cock.

It's so sad to see a man in his 40s/50s still behaving like a child, not showing any signs of growing up and coping with getting old. Pathetic. That's why Metallica sold hundreds of millions albums, while Megadeth, Anthrax, Testament, Slayer etc. didn't even reach 10. Why? Because Metallica realized you can't be a shouty, angry rebel forever, once you hit 30 you inevitabely change and try to cope with your age, you think differently, Metallica made peace with their age and it showed in their music, it also made them a shit ton of money and gained armies of fans, meanwhile Kerry King and the other greaseheads are still yelling about le evil governments and le fuck Jesus Christ while struggling to sell out a 2K nigh club.

>Rouge One

This triggers me so much.

It's called Rouge Won.

Yeah but Metallica went to shit after The Black Album. Granted, the other bands you listed have also gone downhill but none of them have made anything that's as hilariously awful as St. Anger.

or maybe because Metallica was mainstream after enough hits

Load and Reload are pretty good, m8, new album as well. Garage Inc. is the GOAT cover album, I listen to it every summer when I BBQ.

Their music changed vastly, m8.

>1hr 37min review
Good god no.

Garage, Inc. got me into Budgie.

>Garage Inc. is the GOAT cover album
Have you ever listened to Kicking Against the Pricks? It's a great cover album by Nick Cave & The Bad Seeds. Metallica covered a NC&TBS song on Garage Inc.

Yup, pretty based desu.

this

Your point is reasonable, but bringing short-haired Metallica into it is in poor taste.

It's okay that you have succumbed to False-Metal, but you should that the real Metallica died with Cliff Burton.

That is all.

Metallica was still long-haired on Metallica. They were just becoming different people, is all. And I actually salute them for taking the hard-rock/bluesy/southern metal route on Load and Reload.

Kevin Smith is a fanboi, his official stance on capeshit is that we live in an age where we get to see comic books come to life in cinema and that we should be happy about that pretty much no matter what the end result is.

he's never gonna do an unbiased review on capeshit, he'll find something to love with all of it no matter how bad it is

i like some of his early movies and i enjoy his Q&A's, he's good at embellishing stories, he has self-irony and a very self deprecating humor, but listening to a "review" of his on capeshit is a YUUUGE waste of time

youtube.com/watch?v=Kj08Jwp-2q0

Why would that fucker be reviewing a movie when he can't even take criticism for his movies?

UUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUH *I say uh into the microphone so I know where to cut*

so man like I saw this film but before I tells ya about that I was like oh shit I have to suck this dude's dick om nom nom - 'cup the balls asshole' - yes sir - om nom nom. Anyway. *takes a big hit* so fuckin yeah Star Wars man. I was invited by JJ to sit in the Millennium Falcon man, like the actual fucking falcon - and I didn't break it. I was like JJ you want me to suck your dick don't you and he was like 'yes Kevin you have to suck my dick ' and I was all om nom nom *takes a hit* *cough*

UMMMMMMMMMMMMM

so yeah I cried like a bitch, man. This is my childhood. Fuckin Mewes was makin me suck his dick I was like om nom nom

Anyway Rogue One - fuck man this movie gave me CHILLS man. Go see it. Go see it 3 times man I guarantee you will not be disappointed - motherfuckin Darth Vader dude!!!! *cough cough*

So I was sittin next to this dude dressed like Princess Leia. I'm like that's cool he's even got a beard and shit and I'm feelin like I should have dressed up like Princess Leia man. *takes a hit* So then Princess Leia turns to me and grabs the back of my head and I start sucking his dick om nom nom

He directed clerks, mall rats, dogma, j&sb, and red state.
A good career, imo.