> Luke, use the force. Also, did I ever tell you about Galen Erso ? He was one of the Core's most renowned polymaths. A theoretician, a mathematician, an engineer and experimental physicist. Erso worked on manipulating Kyber Crystals, Force-attuned crystals that were at the heart of every Jedi lightsaber. He was used by the Galactic Empire to work on the Death Star, but he was never truly loyal to them. This is why he included a thermal exhaust port, a small opening on the Death Star that leads to its reactor core. He was a good friend.
> Luke, this is Galen Erso. Before I died, I gave the plans showing the exhaust port to my daughter Jyn Erso, a brave woman leading a multicultural group against the white supremacist (human) organization known as the Empire. She also died to give you the plans. All you have to do now is shoot a missile into the seven foot hole that I designed so that any slightly above average pilot could do it. So don't celebrate too much when you succeed, especially since you're not even facing the real deal. In a few decades, a new Empire will rise, with a stronger Palpatine, a stronger Darth Vader, a stronger clone army and a stronger Death Star. Like poetry. Don't worry though, there will also be a stronger, (because female) version of you. You're not special Luke, you're not special wooooo
Luke isn't special. Only Vader is special and by extension, Rey, since she was also born from the force to represent Anakin's repressed emotions.
Jason Jones
ooooooo is this a haunting?
Noah Williams
>by extension, Rey, since she was also born from the force to represent Anakin's repressed emotions. :^)
Xavier Perry
Except Anakin wasn't really the chosen one now that Disney owns Star Wars.
They've re written the story to make Rey the reborn version that that first woman who apparently started the Jedi order.
I don't think I'll see any of the remaining trilogy because of this nonsense.
Bentley Powell
top kek
It all makes sense now
Nicholas Smith
Luke, did I ever tell you I died on the cross for the sins of all humanity? A man named Judas sold me out for 30 pieces of silver. He was a good friend.
Hunter Sanchez
The chain reaction effect in the core is the flaw, not the exhaust pipe , that was still a million to one shot but the best 'hope (get it)' they had
Hudson Cox
Luke is really powerful ya dope. He's a natual, just like Anikan
Ryan Taylor
So... no bothans died?
Or what?
Oliver Gutierrez
Luke, did I ever tell you about my followers in Italy ?
Mason Lewis
Disney was a mistake.
Sebastian Clark
We wuz Rogue one n shieet
Liam Thomas
Common misconception the Bothans died getting the plans for the second death star. So the plan went from "secret suicide mission to an imperial data archive station" to "ehhh, fuck it, just send a bunch of furry dudes to get that shit"
Nathaniel Nguyen
I'll give it a handful of keks
Ethan Jenkins
ARE YOU GONNA APOLOGIZE OR WHAT YOU NU-MALE MOUTHBREATHING NERD?
Anthony Davis
Luke, did I ever tell you about breasts? Breasts were the mammary glands of mammalian species and some reptomammals, and were normally a distinguishing feature of the female of the species. Males did have breasts, but they were far less developed than their female counterparts due to the sexual dimorphism. In some cultures, sentient females nursed their own young. This was true of both primitive planetary societies like Dathomir, where the warrior-women of the Singing Mountain Clan would feed their children even during solemn councils of war,[1] and high-tech interstellar civilization: Leia Organa Solo nursed her twins for some time[2] and Mara Jade Skywalker nursed her son Ben until he was a few months old.[3] Even Tenel Ka Djo, Queen Mother of the Hapes Consortium, nursed her daughter Allana herself.[4]
Alternative techniques of feeding infants did exist, as the TDL nanny droid could store up to two liters of milk internally.[5] Other sentient species retained strong breastfeeding traditions as well: female Wookiees had six breasts, which they used to nurse their litters of cubs.[6] Askajian females also had six breasts,[7] while Gran females had three.[8] As male individuals were not biologically meant to nurse their offsprings, they sported much smaller breasts and produced no milk. Mandalore the Lesser (then a gladiator),[9] Aron Peacebringer (a planetary leader)[10], and Anakin Skywalker (in certain circumstances, such as on Nelvaan) would freely exhibit them. The males in primitive cultures would also go barechested in their young adulthood and childhood, such as the Nelvaanians.[11] Also, males would go barechested to allow freedom of mobility or body temperature, as exhibited by the Whiphid Jedi Master K'Kruhk,[12] Galen Marek while on Felucia,[13], the Korun leader Kar Vastor on Haruun Kal,[14] or Ki-Adi-Mundi when training in his youth.[15] Some males, such as Anakin Skywalker[16] and Corran Horn would also sleep barechested for comfort.
Brody Ward
>later played jesus pottery works in mysterious ways
Levi Hughes
n...no
Luke Morgan
>Makes a giant meme post >gets the movie wrong It's the REACTOR that is the weakness, you fucking Transformers babby, not the exhaust port.
>tfw I am just rused
Jason Mitchell
>Master Paval >I'm Rogue One (tm) >Um, you don't get to bring Padawans.
Isaac Peterson
STAR WAR NOW
Dominic Hughes
I won't go to the original page where all those words are links to other pages, I don't want to see how deep the rabbit hole goes
>So don't celebrate too much when you succeed, especially since you're not even facing the real deal. In a few decades, a new Empire will rise, with a stronger Palpatine, a stronger Darth Vader, a stronger clone army and a stronger Death Star. Like poetry. Don't worry though, there will also be a stronger, (because female) version of you. You're not special Luke, you're not special wooooo
Kek
Oliver Moore
>reborn version that that first woman who apparently started the Jedi order. Wait wat
James Hill
>Luke, did I ever tell you about Maz Kanata? She's a small wise old sage much like Yoda, except she's female. She owns and runs a cantina much like that old one we visited on Tatooine and inexplicably has your lightsaber that you dropped on Cloud City. She's a good friend of your good friend Han Solo, who inexplicably, despite being a decorated war hero, has returned to smuggling at the age of 70. Anyway, Rey, who's developed deep bonds with both Han and Maz in space of a couple hours, knows where your island is and will be popping round soon. I've never met her but I'm sure we'd be really, really good friends.
Asher Russell
Holy shit this is the most unintentionally hilarious thing I've seen today
>disguising a fat actress's rolls as "extra breasts" for her species >explaining away why some horny artist drew DD cup titties on a tree creature >having an Apperances section to list what SW media includes titties
