Would you let them in?
Would you let them in?
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Left yes, right GTFO they gotta eat all the eggs
Id let them slit my fucking throat and watch me bleed to death, if they felt that way.
Especially weaponsfu
What are you kidding? It's free pizza!
>do you want to let in two hot grills to femdom you
ummmm yeah
Of course, it's free fucking pizza
yeah, but I also have roommates, so I doubt it'd happen in that way
Tell them two fuck off, I'm drunk and watching Shrek the Halls on TV right now and I don't wanna be interrupted and slam the door.
inside my butt hole yes!
why were they so crazy anyway
kek, this.
Are you kidding, who doesn't like free pizza?
Yes, I'd let them in. How could any man resist?
No one will ever believe me but a situation eerily similar happened to me when I was 17, and the two girls even looked like this. One was a tanned brunette and the other was a petite blonde girl.
I expected him to shoot them in the head
>Eli Roth directed a movie where Keanu Reeves fucks his real life wife
Did he secretly want to get cucked?
>okay honey now kiss him while naked
It's not often I get bitches willingly entering my rape dungeon.
I have to ask my parents if I bring over friends, and they wouldn't let me have a couple girls in my room.
Am I the only one who saw the original?
YOU FUCKED ME
YOU FUCKED ME
because eli roth has serious psychosexual issues he's trying to work out
Uh you don't get to bring friends
Did you fug?
You can't just lead like that and not provide the full story.
That makes that scene even hotter.
Left has a chain, and right is lying to me with her facial espressions
No
I'll memetext the story
>be 17
>last year of school
>two girls from my school who I barely know show up in the lashing rain to my door with a bunch of movies and want to come in
>They look like OP's pic like I said, not quite as 10/10, but still really good
>spend an hour sitting in my living room with them, confused, watching some trash nickelodeon flick
>they're acting really weird and giddy
>start asking me about personal sex life, and who from school I've fucked
>I just be honest with them and tell them I'm a virgin
>they both look at eachother as if to say 'JACKPOT'
>one of them asks me how I would feel if the other sat on my face (?)
>I act like 'whatever' even though I'm nervous and exited
>just the two of us go to my room
>we're just making out and starting to play around, I'm terrible because I have no experience
>the other walks, laughing, into my room and just hops on the bed
>she never even said anything, just assumed I would know that she's in on the action now
>they both suck me off
>It eventually turns into pretty agressive sex, but it's them being aggressive, I'm basically a mannequin being bounced on
>afterwards they stay for a bit and act like all that didn't even happen
>when we go back to school they hang out with me for a few weeks, but eventually go back to ignoring me
>I told my closest friends about the whole thing, but they didn't believe me obviously, and still don't
>tfw to this day I still don't know if it was an elaborate prank and I'm in some weird porn video on the internet
I'll take things that never happened for 200, Alex
It wouldn't even be hard to make up a story where Keanu was completely blameless. He let them in long enough to get them an Uber (Uber history). At which point they knocked him out with a blow to the head (head wound). They tied him up and fucked him (video). He got free and tried to get the gun. They stopped him and had that gun pointed at him the rest of the weekend (fingerprints on the gun). That's why he was weird when that fat woman came to the door and when he skyped his wife. Then they buried him, trashed the house and left. File an insurance claim to repair the damages then tell your family and friends about it. Free, blameless sex with a 10/10 and a 7/10.
This
Well i'm not married and i have no life so they wouldn't have anything to ruin.
I thought that was Lexi Belle on the left for a second.
I'll believe you user. Sounds just fucking crazy enough to be true.
Now I got to ask who's the 10/10 and the 7/10 in this scenario.
Wouldn't even answer the door.
Ugh
You don't get to bring friends, son
MONSTAR RAWRR
if this is true then I'm fucking pissed off
This guy knows how to lie.
If he did, you wouldn't be saying that.
Think about it.
Only the white one
You forgot the first part
>dear penthouse letters,
Ana is the 10 and whoever the 7 is is irrelevant I'm guessing.
Keanu is the 10, you faggot
I would inspect their pit hair and leg hair first.
Sure, they look like a couple of nice young ladies.
>that lack of ankle mobility
nope
are you, by any chance, sicilian?
Yes, though they gotta let me punch 'em a lot, to assert dominance.
They won't be doing to me what they did to Mr Anderson.
sharpknees.jpg
>yes keanu fuck my wife right here
>no it's not right, we need you to fuck my wife again
what did Roth mean by this?
no, why?
Pic related is acceptable and has sharper knees
You're the only one who cares.
lol alright mr freeze
I don't even let maintenance workers into my house
two bitch stacies aren't gonna make it in
He's absolutely not. Girls who can squat properly are very attractive.
>mfw I came in and saw my grandparents watching this.
Sure my granddad enjoyed it at least.
This
god damn im rock hard now
hadnt planned on jerking off tonight, but here i go
okay mr shit taste
>mfw
image not for ants