ITT: Ways to bypass the no-singles policies

>saying you identify as monosexual
I flipped the whole thing when I used this. Instead of getting registered for Virgin Rehabilitation camp I was escorted to a secret luxury balcony seat that you can't see from regular seats. They even gave me free AMC LuxPop™ popcorn, they were all out of Eva Green sweat essence so I had to settle for BDH's.

do you think you're funny? YOU'RE NOT

Lol funniest thing I've read in my life

All jokes aside, it's not that hard at my local cineplex as long as it's busy.

Tried and true, with a ratio of like 8 wins to 2 losses: When you get to box office play act as if you're distracted by your "friend" in line. So as you're walking up, look back and say something like "Well, that's kind, but i'll just get my own ticket thanks!" Turn to BO attendant, "Oh, sorry, was just talking to my friend- 1 please." If you're a good enough actor it's a breeze, otherwise you might get a cross look. Only a couple times have they asked to meet my "friend." Also, make sure to tip. Once theater staff get to know you as generous, they let some things slide anyway.

The fuck is a BDH?

Read the board FAQ before posting, it's Bryce Dallas Howard

This WON'T work if you are fat/ugly/weirdo, so don't even try it if you are one of the above.

I like my local cinema, you can buy tickets online or from a terminal so you can avoid the waiting lines.

You don't even have to validate your ticket or anything, there are sensors in the seats so as long as the seat you're sitting in was paid for they won't bother you.


It's a pretty great system, and probably works well for singles with low self confidence too

Why didn't you go to the Virgin Rehabilitation camp? There's free pussy there.

Uhm, if you're hot you can usually get the girl behind the counter to come with you see the movie anyway.

Just tell them you're father owns the theater like Hi, i'm John AMC, my dad owns this place, one ticket straight away!

Are no singles rules actually a thing or is this some sort of meme

It's up to the discretion of individual or regional franchisees.

It's true, but it really depends on where you live. It's pretty common in USA, but mostly in small towns.

I typically go in and say I'm asexual. They normally don't believe me and take me to a back room where they strip me naked, and first have a woman strip naked and suck on my flaccid dick, and if I don't get hard, they do the same with a guy. If I still don't get hard, they believe me and let me enter the cinema.
The trick is, 5 hours before you go to the cinema, you take a viagra pill and jerk it for 5 hours straight to the most fucked up porn you can imagine. Then when you go to the cinema, you'll be limb as a noodle and a simple blowjob won't turn you on.


I have a hard time imagining this. Doesn't there have to be a person behind you in line?

>go to singles night at KinöPlêx
>thinking it means loners can see a film by themselves
>it's actually for the state to match you up with a woman
>was forced to register as the Boyfriend of a 45 year old mother of two because if I refused I'd be on the terrorist watch list

SAVE ME TRUMP

Just pay someone to go with you faggot I do it all the time. Tons of people meet up through Craigslist.

>I have a hard time imagining this. Doesn't there have to be a person behind you in line?

Yeah, that's why I said it has to be busy. Has to be at least a dozen people or so to form a crowd. One of the times when I was rejected, it was only an elderly couple and a family of tiny filipinos neither of which convinced the BO attendant.

I once tried the 'my friend already bought his ticket' line. They confiscated my phone looking for evidence that I had any friends. They went through my pictures, emails, internet history, everything. All the while the phone was connected to a large monitor so everything they looked at was visible to people standing in line. Was pretty embarrassing tbqh.

I just say I'm dual trans-sexual so I've got a male and a female personality and count as two persons. If they refuse you can sue them for discriminating against double gendered people.

Wtf? This is the single most fucked up thing I've learned about the USA.

Why do they do this?

Supposed to be a defense against theater shooters

Oh, I see. So it's just an excuse to bar people from entering like "That dude looks sketchy... HEY YOU, no singles here, go home!".

Still, wouldn't it be more cost-effective to just have metal detectors? Or what if it's 2 friend shooters?

Get a gf

kek. You must live in a blue state.

bump 4 answers

What the fuck is no-singles policy? Must be an American thing.

HOLY F*CK wft this so random lol xD

gtfo

>Or what if it's 2 friend shooters?
Only ever happened in columbine.

I'm wondering this too

see
Instituted after TDK slaying out of fear of copycats

are you fucking serious? what a country...

KEK it's like when you are on a school-trip "kids everyone got their partner?!"