You want to hear autism? I used to pretend to play football in my living room by myself...

You want to hear autism? I used to pretend to play football in my living room by myself. I would make up fantasy plays and run end to end and throw the ball to myself. I always would make this play where I would pretend I was Kevin Faulk of the Pats (I fucking hated that guy) and I would bobble a pass and pick it off as a jet player to win the game. Mfw that play never happened

That's not autism you normie faggot

that's just called being a kid you moron

That's normal as fuck for kids. I did that with hockey all the fucking time by making my own Stanley Cup finals and acting them out.

t. autists

I think all kids daydreamed of scoring the winning goal in a world cup final or something like that.

I broke the leg of a couch in our living room doing this. I'd throw a stuffed fuzzy football in the air and run and dive and catch it and land on the couch.

>sometimes i still pretend that i win the big game and impresss my high school crush, or i pretend that i'm singing my favorite song in front of the whole high school to impress my crush
>high school ended 6 years ago

wait you pretended to be a player running a route, instead of playing with friends, loser

>high school ended 6 years ago

>mfw you make me realize I dropped out of college 7 years ago this month

I did this with soccer but pretended to be both the whole team and opposition team and simulate playing against myself. The most autistic part was I would adapt different personalities or styles depending on which player I was pretending to be at any given moment. Most interestingly I tended to play better was playing the role of a good player and would shoot more accurately, even more so than I would ever do normally.
I'd keep score against myself and even have tournaments to knock teams out so I'd have a chance to perform as new teams. It got a bit out of control when I started transferring players from one team to another and creating drama plotlines around teams suddenly getting sugar daddies or losing their star player and having to reflect that in my performance.

You prentended to play football when you were actually playing handegg

that's normal though
I would throw to the other end of the room and dash to make a sick catch and spin around some rotten fatties trying to tackle me and call it a 40 yard play

I would do this but with basketball and I would pretend it was my breakout game and I'd always end up with some really unrealistic statline like 80 points and 50 rebounds. I was a fookin legend

I like to pretend I'm a grill by tucking my dick between my legs

I used to get an erection and I would shove it down to try to fuck my own ass and pretend it was my crushes ass.

Bunch of autists in this thread

I used to take corner kicks by myself in my back yard all the time. I would run back and forth kicking the ball. I didnt have many friends.

Jesus

sometimes i still like to pretend that i'm a guy who posts memes on Sup Forums.... but i never post any memes ( v_v)

You're all assuming I was a kid at the time

tfw before bed i like to pretend that i have a gf and that im not a virgin

>still pretend to be a great footballer
>still pretend to be a rockstar
>still pretend to be intelligent and funny

33 years old.

I imagined myself breaking Buyern player legs left and right to the sound of "That's our lad!" chants from the stands.
I just wanted to be a hero to the people, sacrificing my imaginary career for the greater good of the sport.

>tfw I go to /so/ and pretend it's still great

I used to bounce a racketball in my driveway while making sci-fi noises with my mouth and playing superhero. I have no idea what the racketball had to do with anything but it somehow enabled the fantasizing.

I literally run through my 70 square meters apartment pretending to be a Barcelona player, and I'm 19 years old.
That sopa is really getting into my brain.

Doesn't everyone do this?

>used to go out back with pw and plastic golf balls
>had a notebook with bracket style tourney
>ranked golfers 1-16
>would role play as each person
>whichever ball went furthest in a best 2 of 3 would advance
>did this over and over

Have a great short game now though

My brother once tackled me through a full glass window fucking around in our house.
>not scattering pillows and blankets on the floor and then playing a full contact football game
>having a childhood
Pick one

I used to simulate marathons on my carpet. I cut out pieces of paper, draw flags on them, usually around 50-60 contenders, than I roll dice and move flag. Used to do that for hours.
Sometimes instead of marathon I do "played" Tour de France

When the world series of poker got huge on ESPN I really bit into it when I was like 10 or 12. I would set up hold em with 8 different players around the pool table and play by myself and pretend it was the wsop kek probably not too many other kids that did that.
I did the same with hockey or basketball in the driveway and football on the trampoline so wasent only poker

That's not that weird OP, I used to do this shit, except it was always in video games

>be me
>have madden 2001 on ps2
>create character who looks exactly like me
>max out all stats
>play out the greatest career in nfl history
>repeat with different teams and storylines

I used to do this with every sport think my favorite was we had a pretty decent hill in my backyard and id take my x factor plastic bike ramp and plant it in the snow and for hours and hours pretend I was in a xgames sledding trick competition trying to do barrel rolls 360s and sled flips
Fuck bros I want to go back

wew

amazing

>Max out stats

hi Nick

I still do this, I am 24. I have a whole roster of made up players and teams. I go outside and run around and play pretend. I actually have whole made up countries in my head, with real functioning economies. With things like sport I enjoy imagining the character of individuals anatomy, with depth and realism.

I never lost my imagination, it just got sharpened with the realism of life. Laugh, I don't care. I am happy.

I used to practice my celebrations when I would score a goal all alone on an empty net.

Who here would create fantasy disaster scenarios with traffic Jams?

Shit forgot pic

I did similar things but with Micro Machine toy cars and simulated Indycar races. I would sometimes insert myself and friends into the series but if I was mad at one of them IRL I would have them die in a fiery crash in the 'game'. I eventually evolved it to use excel spreadsheets and would use markers to change the paintjobs on the little cars

I do this from time to time, I am autismo tho.

>not shadowboxing as a kid pretending to be heavyweight champ

Autism: Normie:

>grew up in LA
>the "emergency game" was "get to work on time"

Wow, just realized how fucking weird that is

lol wrong image, sorry, that shit is an unreal quote I'm stealing that

Sounds pretty American to me

>I never lost my imagination, it just got sharpened with the realism of life. Laugh, I don't care. I am happy.

Man, I tried to create a wargame played with plastic toy soldiers and dice in a sandbox when I was 10 and before I knew what actual tabletop gaming was. I tried to get the neighbor kids to develop it with me, but they laughed me off because they were dumb as fuck hockey turbochads right from childhood. Well they might be married college graduates nowadays, but at least I still have my 40k novels and MtG decks to cheer up my lonesome NEET days.

you are 13 and you don't realize that everyone did shit like that when they were young kids. It's more cringey to act like something like that is the end of the world than to not care since you were a kid like the rest of us who did it.

I would do something similar

>it's a loser manchild tries to fit in with Sup Forums thread
This is sad. Listen dude just make a tinder account and try to get laid already. Just do it. Do it.

I used to be a normal fag and I have to say I would rather live like you

this

My brother and I would play full seasons of football and baseball based on our imaginary plays and rules.

>didn't make freshman baseball team
>until the end of senior year had a day dream that the coach wanted me on the Varsity team to help them win state and I hit a walkoff

Handegg, not football.

Everyone does this retard

>told my highschool friends i was the defensive leader of my team
>out of nowhere we have to play against a team with two of them (city cup i think)
>on the bench as usual
>we are losing hard
>coach subs me in as left back for the last 20 minutes
>mental block makes be hoof it upfield everytime i get the ball
>they score, they score, they score again
>get made fun of for years

Good thread

>I never lost my imagination, it just got sharpened with the realism of life. Laugh, I don't care. I am happy.

>All these autists trying to reassure each other that they're normal

Oh shit, I had one of those. I had a happy childhood.

You wanna hear a autism story involving sports, I got ya covered

Okay so I'll start off by telling you my brother is fat, like 400+ pounds but he has always been alittle mentally challenged. He used to get naked and put on his full catchers gear he had when he used to play baseball, so helmet/facemask and chest protector shin guards, the whole whole nine yards. Even cleats which my parents would get pissed because he fucked up the hardwood floors in his room but anyway to make a short story long he would get dressed up but naked underneath and SCREAM an entire baseball game as if he was the announcer calling the game on TV.

He would jump around his room screaming and yelling calling out Every single play. These games were all in his head mind you, he wasn't watching them on TV with mute or something. He would also pretend to be the coach arguing over bad calls with the umpire, so you'd here HUGE fucking bangs and thuds from his room then hear a 5 minute conversation between an 'umpire' and a 'coach'. YOU CAN'T MAKE THAT CALL!!!!!! ONE MORE OUTTA YOU AND YOU'RE GONE!!!! THAT'S IT.... YOU'RE OUUUTTTTTTTTTTTTAAAAA HEEEERRRRE!

Oh and he would throw every pitch and throw balls around his room which was loud as fuck even in the middle of the night. His room was destroyed by baseballs hitting every surface, it got to the point where my parents just boarded up the window because he broke so many. When they took his baseballs away he fuckin freaked out and threw himself down the stairs naked while my parents had company over.

He also screamed at the TV while live games were on but that wasn't as frightening as listening to him do play by play for hours of an imaginary game playing out every pitch and throw.

>and threw himself down the stairs naked while my parents had company over.
is your brother chris farley wtf

Do you want to see autism? Come to my house and watch me flick foam earplugs through a set of miniature goalposts I built. Any dragon you can imagine, point to a spot on the floor and I'll nail the kick from across the room. Don't challenge me to a flick-off, because my right index finger will kick your ass.

So he's your average baseball fan, got it.

basebore fans are autistic, we know this already

ABC wants to hire you brother to create their next TV series

...

loll I forgot about how he used to slide into stuff too, so for example my mom would call him for dinner and he would run full fucking speed and dive head first slide like Pete Rose onto the kitchen floor. He broke so much furniture because he would throw the ball up in the air and then jump onto couch and try and catch it. It probably would be ok if you're not 400 fuckin pounds but he wasn't.

He also had some weird yeast infections under his fat rolls, it was so gross. My mom would ask me to put his medication on it because she would just gag and couldn't do it. He scratched it constantly, even in public, once at Christmas time in front of my sister's new husband's parents. He would lift up his shirt and his fat rolls and just stare at you right in the eye while having a conversation and itch that shit and the look of horror on their faces was something else. His belly button had some weird boil for awhile, I'm not even sure wtf it was but it would leak and ooze this yellow orangish puss and stain the front of his pants. My mom got him all kinds of bandages and gauze because his 6xl pants weren't cheap and the stains just wouldn't come out, it was whack.

>little mentally challenged.

Wanna bet him becoming a baseball fan preceded this condition?

Still better than Joe Buck

I still do shit like this and I'm 34 years old.

I used to have wrestling matches with pillows and I broke a couch and a mattress doing exactly that as a kid.

I'm 6 foot 3
I'm 27 years old
When no one is home I grab my baseball jersey , put my cap on , grab my bat and pretend I'm in a bottom of the 9th needing a homer to walk off situation

I do it at random moments and then I'll get my glove and pretend I'm pitching a perfect game with a sold out crowd watching

>so autistic that i don't even fantasize directly about doing those things but literally fantasize about showing people (girls) a fucking VIDEO of me winning the big game etc. and them being really impressed
need to kill myself soon

...

Want to hear autism?

I'm 25 and a kissless virgin. I haven't had friends since middle school. I have never been to a bar socially. I attended a 4 year college near my home area where my teams are from, and they went far in the playoffs in their respective sports while I attended, and I watched the games alone in my room

Someone put a bullet into my brain already

Don't blame you. I'm almost a normie and I can say that the interactions are so fake and pointless.

how so?

> make this thread days ago.
> come back
> still gold
Never change Sup Forums

Based

Start drinking in your room all by yourself, it'll ease the pain

dude, just put him out lo

>tfw when my hockey team is moving out next year

back to being depressed all day during the hockey season...i guess its for the better if its nassau

Its called daydreaming , everyone does it. Even the chadiest chad dreams about fucking two stacys instead of just the one he already got

>as a kid

I do that as an adult. Is it normal to fantasize while shadowboxing? I don't mean the usual imagining an opponent. I mean like autistically fantasizing that you're the champ who no one can beat

He still alive?

The tism is strong here.

I did this with fantasy fighting until high school
It's fine I think

i scream at my mirror and tell me how much i hate me but then i laugh and say it's all good and that i'm alright

Nothing wrong with this as long as you weren't a grown-ass man when you did it

Uhh....not grown ass man but not a child. I...im normal r..right?

>I-I'm normal right?

this thread fucking reeks of insecurity. grow some balls

Hello new friend

dude what the fuck

exact same behaviour here

Underrated post.

>used
I'm still doing it, no regret, it's the happiest time of the day