Hi Sup Forums, I have decided to convert to Judaism, how is this done?

Hi Sup Forums, I have decided to convert to Judaism, how is this done?

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youtube.com/watch?v=cXSE78KlB9o
timesofisrael.com/reporter-who-exposed-fake-polish-rabbi-says-hes-getting-heat-from-jewish-leader/
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Cut off your foreskin and send it to a rabbi
You will be in instantly

...

£10,000 minimum for the entry modules.

acquire shekels, goyim.

1. find a rabbi
2. fondle his balls
3. retrieve a rare bologna beetle from the forest
4. fondle his balls

You can't, you have to be chosen by God.

cut off your foreskin and get your nose enlarged

Scandi hat-trick.

Embrace Satan.

youtube.com/watch?v=cXSE78KlB9o

Honestly jews seem like pol if u think abt it
And their end goal is a supreme light skinned race? I mean, if I wasnt already Christian id consider it

So basically I just have to slice 2 cocks? Seems easy enough.

Why do you want to convert to Judaism?

Privilege, but mostly just to fuck with people, already changed my Facebook to reflect my new conversion.
>also shekels

snibety snap :DDD

Oy vey! You will always be a filthy Goy beast.

You need to find a woman who is jewish and get the approval of father to marry her. Then you will go through conversion. Pretty sure orthodox don't just let people convert, don't know about reform.

If you aren't jewish you are pretty much funded.

That does sound like a lot of work... Any Jewish countries that would want a Norwegian green card?

Top heh.

Why bother truly converting? Just fake it and come out as a closet kike

Me too, I've always wanted to be filthy rich

I've already given my up foreskin, now I only need to find a jewish goddess to feed her my spicy salami

>Jewish countries

So Israel? You could apply for citizenship. If you have great skills and credentials they may grant it. But you really are going to have to stand out. I recommend learning Hebrew, starting today if you have the money to buy a language program. If not, I'm sure there are some videos on YouTube that can give you some basic knowledge of the language. Obviously a program will be more effective unless you can learn languages easily. I would love to marry a Jewess, but you must convert. And I am not willing to do that.

Forgot remove name again my bad

They don't really take converts unless you're a hot chick.

>retrieve a rare bologna beetle

Well, I though about learning another language after German.

Though I think I'll just learn some basics and tell people that I'm a Jew.

Jews hate nature and the natural order, because it's pure and beautiful, and also because it's bigger and stronger than they are, and they feel that they can not fully control it. Nature's beauty and harmony stands in stark contrast to their squalidness and ugliness, and that makes them hate it all the more. Jews are destroyers. They are anti-humans. The anti-human Jew hates and wants to destroy all non-Jews. He will also destroy even other Jews who are less destructive and evil than he is, if they get in his way. Apparently, the wickedness of the Jew is genetically based.

keep bait out of fucking Sup Forums

we're here to discuss, crudely, real topics.

fuck off with your faggot troll thread.

I was wondering about Jewish initiation rituals, twas a legit thread.

Going off now, some user say left or right, chose a book for me.

A nose job

Say you're Jewish. That's all it takes, friend. We're a friendly bunch in reality.

I was born with a huge nose and dark hair so I just always told people I was Jewish. I did my senior project on the Holoucost and got a 100 when everyone else did mediocre. My dad even came to my presentation and talked like a Jew and said oy vey in surpirise. I'm now a junior in college and no one is any wiser that I'm not a Jew.

From a biblical point of view, you just got to steal the "blessing".

awesome armpits

first off, congrats on the intelligent choice.

Judaism is the original Abrahamic religion and one of the first monotheistic religions. Everything that came after is manmade bullshit.

You won't get any shekels or special privilege for converting, but you will be a part of the original Covenant between God and mankind.

There are those who believe that "New" Covenants are the path to salvation. You can ignore them due to the fact that the Word of God is perfect and unchanging, by definition. A "New" Covenant implies that God has somehow changed His mind or made a mistake and had to correct it. Anyone believe this is clearly not sure what God is at all.

>based
This user gets it, I luckily too have a big (Polish) nose.

Hey just remember don't let your dreams just be dreams.

timesofisrael.com/reporter-who-exposed-fake-polish-rabbi-says-hes-getting-heat-from-jewish-leader/

he got away with it for years.

You are truly stupid if you believe that is how it works.

If true, you have an awesome dad.

>how is this done?

Rabbi studies, ceremonial cock cut (even if you already are), and some holy book mumbo jumbo.

You won't get invited to the secret meetings though. Only those born jewish get to decide on how to mess with the cattle.

This guy gets it.