Frodo, did I ever tell you about Alfrid Lickspittle , a servant to the Master of Laketown, in TA 2941...

>Frodo, did I ever tell you about Alfrid Lickspittle , a servant to the Master of Laketown, in TA 2941. And later he assisted Bard during The Hobbit: The Battle of the Five Armies and had more screentime than me and Gandalf. He was created by Peter Jackson and was basically a clone of Wormtongue. He later dresses as a woman and hides in a catapult attached to a dead Troll. However, one of Alfrid's coins slips off his corset and falls on the catapult lever. The coin acts as counterweight, throwing Alfrid inside the troll's mouth. Both Alfrid and the troll are asphyxiated, He was a good friend

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Pics of Bilbo guzzling black cock or leave

Why did Bilbo draw Smaug with 4 legs instead of 2?

Because he had 4 legs

because he wasnt a drake
he was a dragon

>J-jackson was under pressure from the studio
>h-he's not a lucky hack

Frodo, did you know that your name is actually Maura Labingi? Tolkien was a good friend

>"Oy Vey, Mr Jackson, we've been hearing rumours you plan to make the Hobbit in two parts and not three?"
"Yes, it's a short childrens book"
>"Oy Gevalt, what a holocaust, Mr Jackson, we are missing out on a third film worth of shekels here"
"It'll be hard to make the source material last two films, let alone 3"
>"A shoah, right here in my office, remember the 2 billion, Mr Jackson, we demand you make stuff up, invent new characters, show popular characters from Lord of the Rings, lots and lots of CGI"
"Yes, my chosen one"
>"One last thing you Goy animal, we hear the dragon has 4 legs... it only needs 2 to walk, many shekels will be saved"

Actually he was a wyrm which is the saxon term but Tolkien isn't particularly consistent either since he was trying to make it understandable for people unaccustomed to old english. Wyrms are just a flying snake with 4 legs.

when will this meme end? dragons have been depicted with 2 legs since always.

I have a lot of empathy for filmmakers who's work is taken out of their hands and fucked with by a studio.

But when you whore out for a product you know is shit and try to sell it as a great idea like Jackson did for The Hobbit or Stallone did for the pg-13 Expendables 3 then you deserve to go down with the ship.

I fucking hate Spike Lee and think he's a total cunt but even then he didn't hide the fact that his Oldboy remake was fucked with by the studio while he was promoting it (he deserved it for remaking Oldboy but whatever).

But in game of thrones the dragons have 4 legs, are you trying to tell me the legendary author JRR Tolken is wrong? pssh, fat chance

>Depict the jew as trying to maximize the commercial capability of the The Hobbit
>"Make stuff up, invent new characters."

What happened with Spike Lee and Oldboy? What did the studio do?

It's not a meme in terms of heraldy, a 2 legged 'dragon' is a wyvern and a 4 legged is a dragon. Similar to how lions are depicted passant and rampant.

There has never been any consistent definition for dragons and wyverns and most normal people have never even heard of the term wyvern

Wyvernfags are retarded

what? no they dont, grrm specifically makes a point that his dragons have 2 legs because theres no real animal that has 4 legs + wings

did you just meme yourself?

why didn't they just fly the eagles to erebor?

What did they mean when they said Smaug was the last Great Dragon? Do the rest of the dragons alive have the size of a doggo?

If I remember correctly and understand I've not seen the film but the movie was supposed to be 3 hours long & the studio forced them to cut it down to a shorter runtime.

Spike Lee actually tried to outdo the single take hallway fight scene in his version by making it longer or whatever but then they had to put an edit in the middle of it to shorten the overall runtime. The interview I read was Spike Lee saying (before the film came out) that it ruined the entire point of how the scene was filmed but he had no control over it.

How did the Uruk Hai know what a rotisserie chicken was

Of all the fucking problems this parody of a trilogy has, retards focus on the limbs of Smaug.

This is why we don't deserve nice things.

I never had this kind of problem in the Italian version... there, the Uruks just say:
"The meat is back, friends!"

Italian dubs often do this. Italian version Jar-Jar is slightly more bearable.

>because theres no real animal that has 4 legs + wings

>what are every flying insect

oh i'm sure

>babada boopi?
>MEESA BABADA BABADA BONGO

>Frodo, if you ever meet an elf named Legolas, make sure to say hi to him for me. He was a good friend.

Family Guy stopped be funny like 10 years ago.
The simpsons (!!!!!) make italian jokes that can make us laugh too, mr MacFarlane should just sing, is the only thing in which he is competent.

tell me if italian sounds like babada boopi

youtube.com/watch?v=-e8nvLNY1eg

Because they've been to taverns, you dumb fuck.

that and the nonwhite extras in Laketown.

>THERE WERE NO NON-ARYANS IN ESGAROTH THEN! THIS IS WHITE GENOCIDE!

it totally does

That was pathetic pandering, like the scene with the women attacking orcs big and bad as uruks (so why Saruman took all that effort again?) with pitchforks yelling "we men now".
But the nonwhite extra was few seconds, and could even be suggestive of the town as a crossroad... why a southron cannot be north? Just one? No damage done.

Meanwhile, Radagast is a retard that runs on a rabbit sled, the white council is composed by drunkhard, The Hobbit movie as a whole seems the Dwarf, Kate from lost speaks with the Hot Dwarf using High School Romance tier dialogue, and no chasing has tension or stakes whatsoever.

Then wash your ears. Is time.

Weren't there black dwarfs in the very opening of the first film?

>il piccolino pinocchio bababoopi bambino can't handle the bantz

Ahaha din't notice. My god. I did not re-watched them, too painful, so is easy to miss them for me.

??? no I am fine with that.
If you are trying to use your limited vocabulary to troll thinking that I am somehow distressed, go ahead. meanwhile, I talk with this guy
About interesting stuff.

>we hear the dragon has 4 legs... it only needs 2 to walk, many shekels will be saved"

10/10

What kind of troll? Cave troll?

samefag
I prefer that guy of the gorgoroth that beats the ever-loving shit out of Aragorn