What the fuck is his problem?

What the fuck is his problem?

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He got lost in the memes

nothing really. he's just a hardcore christian conservative living in the wrong century.

too intelligent for movies

Nigger needs money. Clickbait is the only way to feed his family.

He writes like an offended 2nd year homosexual english student.

You mean because he is ahead of his time and belongs on the ultra conservative future?

He dislikes the first Transformers but likes the second one. How?

He's like that show Scorpion. What stupid people think smart people sound like.

>He writes like an offended
This is what I hate about him. Every thing he writes seems to be an attack on the film and it's makers or a defense against those he thinks will criticize it. He's clearly a well read guy but he writes from the same place an internet shitposter does

Your name suits you

he's an actual critic and not a paid shill manchild who just says they love every new cape flick

>What stupid people think smart people sound like.
The kind of sentence stupid people think smart people say when they read it somewhere else then repeat it because they think it sounds clever.

He's desperate. He needs a schtick. It's so obvious it makes me sad for the guy. But if he can feed some people and stay afloat, who am I to criticize in this world.

Devilish trips. You know how many faggots have made that same comment to me thinking they were funny?

> Actual critic
nyfcc.com/2011/11/jack-and-jill-reviewed-by-armond-white-for-cityarts/

HAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Have you read this dipshits 'florid prose'? It's adjective ridden nonsense. Like if you decorated your house in purple.

If that review keeps him from being a real critic then every single critic that gave a positive review for TFA also loses real critic status

He's more amusing and entertaining than any other movie critic - one of the reasons being because of the style in which he writes. He also always presents a unique perspective. He goes out of his way to say the thing no one else is saying, which means his reviews are interesting and worth reading. The only people who dislike Armond White are dipshits angry he insulted a movie they like or liked a movie they didn't, in which case they are fucking pathetic.

>He goes out of his way to say the thing no one else is saying, which means his reviews are interesting and worth reading
Sure, it's a novel idea and I appreciated the joke for a while, but after a point he seems to have started taking himself as his misguided fans do

> I speak for everyone when I say The Force Awakens was bad. If you liked it, you're wrong

You see, no matter what you say about TFA being a carbon copy of A New Hope, it is a competently made movie. There are no redeeming qualities to Adam Sandler's shlock

...

He makes reviews that redditors never bother destroying. Instead they just post Evans laughing. Can you see how their lack of retorts validates Mr. White?

Amusing to you people. Phony people always register with phony psyches. You're like when sociopaths see each other in public. They KNOW. The problem is, they're better at covering it up and far more sophisticated.

Except he just praised Hidden Figures.

He's a contrarian. Plain and simple.

>shlock

RLM bot detected

Nope. I liked Rogue One more than TFA by quite a bit actually

He's a man of taste in a world of plebs.

>Hidden Figures dramatizes a different social tragedy: the Jim Crow–era segregation that once was in effect at the National Aeronautics and Space Administration. But Hidden Figures aims for a more conventional celebration. It honors the Southern black female mathematicians whose calculations were essential to readying the space program.

>Sure, it's a novel idea and I appreciated the joke for a while
You type like a fedora tipping faggot.

The points I made are valid and true, but they don't mean he's completely frivolous. He's got a serious ideological gripe against the consumer capitalist system which devalues art and against the current state of criticism which enables it by praising dross and ignoring actually decent films in favour of blockbusters. People only focus on the big, popular blockbusters they hated/he liked or he hated/they liked, but he's far more authentic in his reviews of serious art whereas the shit films you take so seriously he turns into the pathetic joke they are.

It is possible to be authentic and inauthentic at the same time, mon frere. Free your tiny mind.

>continually revealing your pleb status

Your post is literally Kevin Federline levels of fedora tipping. Are you entirely unaware? Someone needs to rescue your at sea ass.

>taking cinema seriously as an artistic medium is fedora
For a moment, I forgot where I was, you see. I thought I was on IMDB forums, where there is a higher level discourse than the drivel you're offering up. Kill yourself, faggot.

does that movie disparage conservatism or christianity in some way?

HAHAHAH holy shit, now the contrarians of Sup Forums are gonna pretend this movie is good just because he said so

It's the definition of a liberal movie.

But since he liked it, everyone will pretend it represents conservatism values.

IMDB is worse than youtube. You just grenaded any respect anyone could have for you. You really are a mess man. Sorry.

Most of them don't even speak english on imdb.

Youtube comments are better than the shit you're typing, you dense cunt.

Wasn't IMDB's #1 movie of 2016 Suicide Squad?

keep on, keeping on, brother.

He needs to eat and the market for film criticism is oversaturated.

Fuck off cunt, you're just embarrassing yourself at this point

The king of Sup Forums

>you're just embarrassing yourself
You know you've blown the fuck out of someone when they say this - it's the go-to when they've run out of everything. Thank you, mon frere. I will the warm glow of victory.

I agree that the points you made are valid, to an extent. His meta-joke on film criticism is worthwhile, I really do like what he does on paper. But he's been pulling this shtick for so fucking long, if it was ever fully a joke it's lost now.

If he cares so much for serious art why use his name almost solely to write about movies he views in complete contempt? It seems so cynical and pointless. I don't like most Hollywood films either, so I don't watch them. I find plenty of outlets to read and talk about non-mainstream film, so it's not like he had to put on an act to get paid as a critic. He's a profiteer working off the same machine you're saying he hates

No, people here only care abut criticism if it fits their preconceived notions of a movie. Armond is the patron saint of contrarians for shitting on 12 Years a Slave, but they'll collectively ignore his praise for this similarly "white guilt" movie. The reasons or actual film don't matter

CUNT is the homunculus of human regret that rolls out of a person that knows death isn't far off.

...

If you plebs actually read his reviews you'd discover rhat the only thing he praised about T2 were the visuals.

In the same article he says that Bay has never bothered choosing a good script and also calls him mindless.

His problem is he chose the wrong skin color.

What?

That movie seems to be the type he hates like The Butler.

Did he say anything about the nigger Transformers and the testicles Transformer? That shit was fucking terrible but it made Transformers interesting for once.

nah
but he praised other scenes
>
Transformers doesn’t simultaneously critique pop culture like Joe Dante’s Small Soldiers, Paul W.S. Anderson’s Death Race or Joseph Kahn’s near-miraculous Torque (none of Bay’s mechanical anthropomorphism matches the wit of how Torque’s human characters live through their vehicles) but there is satire in Sam’s roommate Leo’s (Ramon Rodriquez) Everynerd chatter: “The internet’s pure truth! Video doesn’t lie!” That breathless naivete indicts Transformers’ target audience yet there’s something in scenes of an overturned carrier ship, of alien assaults on the Great Pyramids or Sam’s Clockwork Orange torture that is close to wonderful. Bay’s skills have found their appropriate subject now that he’s abandoned fake history (Pearl Harbor) for fantasy.

>Armond /ournigger/ White
>likes
>Grown Ups
>Jack and Jill
>Jonah Hex
>G.I. Joe
>G.I. Joe 2
>Battle: Los Angeles
>The Green Hornet
>Clash of the Titans
>Indiana Jones 4
>Transformers 2
>Death Race
>Fantastic Four: Rise of Silver Surfer
>I Now Pronounce You Chuck and Larry
>Takers
>Taken
>Transporter 3
>Resident Evil: Afterlife
>Batman V Superman: Dawn of Justice

You tell me what the problem is, to me the fact that he doesn't like some genuinely good films that are a minority yet likes this means hes a stupid nigger

He works in an industry full of idiots.

This. People always cite what the saw on the tomatometer or heard someone else say in a shitpost. If you look up the reviews on half the the things Sup Forums claims he liked/didn't like you'll see he's not just being contrarian.

>pretend this movie is good
I take it you haven't seen the movie, right?

Source?

Also, read

>all
>that
>shit

Add Hidden Figures to the list.

>hated La La Land for literally no other reason than supposedly being "vapid" apparently

Usually he's on point, but sometimes he just gets a hate-boner and arbitrarily shits on things.

He's right on the money with that and I hate him.
La La Land is vapid trash.

Did CUNT finally quit life? That massive dipshit really depressed me.

Garbage like that just leaves me with no hope.

>Except he just praised Hidden Figures.
>He's a contrarian.
You realize you just introduced the best possible piece of evidence refuting Armond being a contrarian, right? That movie had universal critical acclaim, and it's the type of movie he usually bashes.

He's a contrarian 90% of the time.

I'm fully aware that he sometimes he likes "good" movies to keep the charade up.

Don't forget Norm of the north

the surest way to spot a newfag redditor is when they spout this "contrarian" garbage. it's so fucking annoying

You can believe that if you want but if you actually investigate your claim you'd see that you're wrong. If you look at rotten tomatoes they rate him as agreeing with the Tomatometer about 50% of the time.

He's gay.

the surest way to spot a pleb is that they think anyone who disagrees with them is a contrarian or troll

We have gay Muslim terrorists now. Why can't we have gay christian conservatives?

>>>Battle: Los Angeles
What is wrong with liking Battle LA?

>I Now Pronounce You Chuck and Larry
>Taken
>Transporter 3
>Batman V Superman: Dawn of Justice
Am I supposed to pretend these aren't good?

Everyone in this thread is basically swirling the barrel of failure.

You're all just genetic human mistakes.

...

He triggers redditors with his truth, and since this board is 90% redditors, he understandably upsets people

then explain

post reality poverty people don't need to explain themselves. they live how they want. not how it is.

There is a very small subset of Sup Forums who are actual patricians and are under constant bombardment from the pleb/capeshit armies. Clearly one of my patrician brothers made image

>truth


Lmfao kiddo
see
The fact you are so autistic you have to idolize a fucking dumb nigger is irony at its finest

He triggers plebs in this board and reminds them how dumb they are so that's ok with me

dirt people are dirt people. we get it.

No you don't