Hermione in 1st grade: Does completely perfect Petrificus Totalus

Hermione in 1st grade: Does completely perfect Petrificus Totalus
Hermione in 5th grade: "Harry, you have to teach me magic."

what a dull franchise, seriously

Did you honestly expect logic from one of the dullest franchises in the history of movie franchises? Seriously each episode following the boy wizard and his pals from Hogwarts Academy as they fight assorted villains has been indistinguishable from the others. Aside from the gloomy imagery, the series’ only consistency has been its lack of excitement and ineffective use of special effects, all to make magic unmagical, to make action seem inert.

Perhaps the die was cast when Rowling vetoed the idea of Spielberg directing the series; she made sure the series would never be mistaken for a work of art that meant anything to anybody, just ridiculously profitable cross-promotion for her books. The Harry Potter series might be anti-Christian (or not), but it’s certainly the anti-James Bond series in its refusal of wonder, beauty and excitement. No one wants to face that fact. Now, thankfully, they no longer have to.

>a-at least the books were good though
"No!"
The writing is dreadful; the book was terrible. As I read, I noticed that every time a character went for a walk, the author wrote instead that the character "stretched his legs."

I began marking on the back of an envelope every time that phrase was repeated. I stopped only after I had marked the envelope several dozen times. I was incredulous. Rowling's mind is so governed by cliches and dead metaphors that she has no other style of writing. Later I read a lavish, loving review of Harry Potter by the same Stephen King. He wrote something to the effect of, "If these kids are reading Harry Potter at 11 or 12, then when they get older they will go on to read Stephen King." And he was quite right. He was not being ironic. When you read "Harry Potter" you are, in fact, trained to read Stephen King.

not dull, but for children!! :)

Hermione is not as talented as Defence Against The Dark Arts as Harry

Harry withstands a Crucio curse from FakeMoody in Goblet of Fire in one of their lessons, and none of the other students can

She's also terrible at flying, because it's not something you can learn in a book.

Totally wanted the D.

Hermoine is the student that pays full attention in college classes and devotes herself to them fully, but has no skills that can be applied in the industry.
Harry is the guy who's mediocre in college work but has learned truly important stuff from experienced people.

Programmers will understand what I am saying.

I want to _____ Hermione.

5/10 intro

al that magic semen fucked up her head

Based.

Kill yourselves

>"No!"

gets me every time

Teach

ok you can have a (you) as well.

Kill yourself, retard

as soon as they hit puberty learning is no longer a priority.

>Harry, you have to teach me magic
What she meant was she wanted to try out Harry's wand.

Here is your (you).

>Harry has all the skills
>spends the rest of his life pushing papers at the ministry
JUST

>She's also terrible at flying,
So why did Rowling make her fly on a broom at the battle of Hogwarts when she stablished a priori that she hates brooms and can't fly even if her life depended on it?

>Rowling
There's your answer.

The Russian fucked her stupid.

You know why.

She should have let Draco fly that broom, at least he knows how to fly

kiss

Gotta work on that opening more, soo it's more appropriate to each thread

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she managed to grow up and be a boring and ugly adult, but right there she was a 10/10.

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I ship that

She sucks at some magic like Patronus because she's more rational than instinctive about life.

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Sucks to be an auror when there are no dark wizards around eh.

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See

these are weird

why are you trying to make sense of a kids flick series?
are you underage?

Is this that girl that looks like that weird doll?

Because the actress is weird and can't act her way out of a paper bag.

I seriously question most of the classes in Hogwarts they are basically impractical to a ridiculous degree.

For example there should be a class called

Magic Basics that teachs them how Magic works on a fundamental level

Then Magic Spell Casting
Magical Enchantment Class
Potion Making Class
Spell Invention Class
Next they should split magical spells into subgroups like Fire Magic, Creature Magic, Death Magic, Ice Magic, Time Magic, Earth Magic, Electric Magic, and so on....

Just going LOL I POINTS MUH WANTS PEW PEW PEW makes a pretty boring magic system.

Why the fuck do they even use paper if they have magic?

>I seriously question most of the classes in Hogwarts they are basically impractical to a ridiculous degree.

>Next they should split magical spells into subgroups like Fire Magic, Creature Magic, Death Magic, Ice Magic, Time Magic, Earth Magic, Electric Magic, and so on....

sigh... i'll bite.. "the great gatsby" and "the stranger" are overrated pieces of shit

Why was Hogwarts so dirty and down in the dumps if they have fucking magic?

Why cant the students just teleport to their classrooms if they have fucking magic?

By seperating spells into sub categories you can make the magic system more interesting, like explain the requirements needed to cast an electrical spell which would be the conversion of magical energy(whatever the fuck that is) into electrical energy. Converting magic into fire creates fire spells, and converting magical energy into matter creates ice, water and earth spells. Pretty simple to understand really you retarded fuck.

As for how shit like Avada Kedabra works well you will need more than conversion for that for to work, you will need to a permit from the Lord of Death in order to use Avada Kedabra because its kill instantly so its like a command from the Lord of Death itself.

Dementors are lame because they seem to be retarded.

Why did she have to turn out to be a disgusting feminist bitch?

Fuck she was so cute.

They use paper because they have magic.

Why not use some energy script thingy like what computers basically use nowadays instead of paper?

She was so cute here.

Because they have MAGIC. A computer doesn't make their lives easier, it would make a fabulous birthday gift for Mr. Weasley though.

This never happened what a shitty dull
@78389841
Autistic board and thread

She wanted harry to teach their peers

You know you can learn things over seven years, right?

Why is this board seriously retarded?

Just because she doesn't like flying doesn't mean she won't if she needs to

what a boring predictable post her face looked the same after puberty as it did in cos

>Why was Hogwarts so dirty and down in the dumps if they have fucking magic?
I don't think it was that bad, either way blame the elfs.
>Why cant the students just teleport to their classrooms if they have fucking magic?
Teleportation is dangerous (you can lose a limb) and is only taught to adults.

Befriend

Gets of truth.

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Its fake you underage retard
She was great and praised from the onset your waifu a shit

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>Lord of Death
For Merlin's sake, what are you even talking about?

Hear me out.

A movie adaption of Lolita with Emma Watson as the the child

young emma could have been perfect for a valerie remake

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>you will need to a permit from the Lord of Death in order to use Avada Kedabra

I love you Emma.

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'no'

she got dumber just like in real life.
young emma watson irl: I'm having so much fun getting all this attention and money for living the easy life
old emma watson irl: women, if I'm going to succeed in ending our oppression I'm going to need all your help. if not me, who? if not now, when???!?! put down that polly pocket you little shits, you're perpetuating antiquated gender roles!!!

Im trying to explain how one can use magic to instantly kill someone in a way some moron couldnt figure out in seconds.

The magical energy bolt in Avada Kedabra causes instant death meaning it would have to be programmed to cause neuro activity in your brain cells to cease instantly now an eletrical spell could do this but JK Rowling is a fucking retard so lets assume it doesnt turn off your brain it just WILLS YOU TO DIE, just like that you drop dead once it hits you, so its more like an abstract metaphysical command than just a magic spell. If that is the case then the requirements needed to do the spell must be very hard to do for this to make any sort of sense at all.

I'm just saying if you ever get a time travel device.

Jesus, you are such a muggle.

Thats one of my complaints in this series, no scientific study of magic itself, I guess thats what happens when unde 95 IQs can use magic, imagine if a autist wizard had magic he could then make scientific theories on how its used.

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He'd probably die trying.

control your eyebrows

still a 'no' teabh

Hey autist hermione only does it when sperging out. Pay attention to all the times she doesn't because there's a ton.

Well at least he could explain magic that would be very great.

Ummm she dropped out of the most dishonest film of the year..her demeanor hasn't changed you're upset she didn't answer your fan mail.

>tfw she will never work your cock with those eyebrows

girls ship them together. are you a grill?

Because Rowling is a hack.

See
You hivemind memer

>work your cock
what?

Stop watching cartoons.

>scientific study of magic itself
>scientific
>study of magic
>scientific
>magic
>itself
You are a fucking retard. Keep posting though you're making me laugh.

If science could explain it it wouldnt be magic you dumb motherfucker

What if Hermione fell to the dark side and became the most powerful wizardess the world has ever known.

Would you join her side and be her loyal servant or try to capture her to torture some sense into her?

>wizardess

Everyone look here. Really look at this post. Now remember this place has the single most worst opinions known to mankind.

>tfw Hermione shows up at a class reunion and looks like that

SIDE QUESTION:

how come harry's patronus is just a force field but in episode 5 everyone else had an animal ghost thing

i know in 3 he briefly had that deer thing but otherwise it's just a force field

left>right