So this puddin-face chick comes up to you close and says, I've seen you looking at me, and I know you want to fuck me

so this puddin-face chick comes up to you close and says, I've seen you looking at me, and I know you want to fuck me.

you're response?

y u bully trump

ok, first let me get a paper bag

Can you get me a spoon

But I'm gay and even if I wasn't I don't fuck disgusting people, go take pictures of your asshole.

bend over bitch

I'd says "It's but a shadow and a thought that you love", turn 360° and walk away.

For real though, she's not exactly worth losing my gf over.

No mistress, I only live to serve and worship your feet

Not an achievement though, I want to fuck a lot of things with holes

*unsheathes katana*

No, I am not response.

y-you too

say "let's fuck"
if she says yes, i get to fuck jlaw
if no, nothing is lost

>say "let's fuck"

that's your move? virgin detected.

> not getting straight to the point
Virgin detected

Tell her thats a bit forward of her and you'd rather take her out on a date

Start sucking on her tits

i'm not talking to you faggot, i'm talking to her now move the fuck out of our way

"BACK THE FUCK OFF!?!?!?!?"

she already got straight to the point, you should push back and build anticipation, make her want it. now who's the virgin.

Begin frantically blowing on my rape whistle and shouting "I NEED AN ADULT"

are you 12?

...

Heh, why wouldn't I? You're just like me, and aren't we all narcissistic creatures on a basic level?

You sound fedora as fuck.

>not really, i hate you mostly because after the first movie i saw of you my girlfriend broke up with me and that has stuck with me forever
>cunt

this is exactly why moot got fired. are you trying to do the same thing to asian-moot?

The thing that's always dumbfounded me about those pics is

Why does she legitimately look better in them than she does in every $200 million blockbuster she stars in?

Does Hollywood make her look doughy and frumpy on purpose? To what end?

What's her best movie to fap ?

I mean, it would be cool to fuck a famous Hollywood actor.

This aint his gf mate just some bitch hes gonna fuck.

Ask for payment since she's so ugly.

yes, if she doesn't fuck like she acts

I was scanning the horizon.

*unzips dick*

Madonna was offering BJ's, you missed.

I asked Madonna how we would collect on her offer, but she never replied. Guess she should have answered, now Hillary's lost.

Because then she is just like us

Even better, just tell her you can still turn this around.

MUH DICK

Are you saying I could pretend to be plotting an assassination attempt, get the blowjob, and then never follow through? Because that's a good idea.

Kek

Whisper 8 years when you finish.

Apparently she swallows. She's going to be chasing that shit with regret.

I'd probably ask her on a date.

Yes and what is this?!

Because she has a chubby and greasy face.

>tickle

I would be licking those soles up and down and suck her toes like there's no tomorrow. And don't even get me started on the sniffing. Oh how I would sniff! They don't call me The Footsniffer for nothing, The Sole Man, The Toe Diddler, The Man With No Shame (when it comes to feet!), The Inhaler,

tongue punch her fucking soles so hard HNNNNNNNG