ITT: we pretend The Laws of the Game was written by Americans
>keeping possession in opponent's half for more than 1 minute without attempting to shoot will result in a foul
>a goal from outside of penalty box is worth 1.5 point
>substituted players can get back in again
>teams are allowed 3 timeouts per game
sounds pretty exciting desu
is it because america has always been a republic that we have really strict rules in our leagues?
Soccer seems more loose in regulating it's rules.
>game wouldn't suck
Game stopped every three minutes for an ad break
Only way to score is via set pieces.
Tony Pulis is considered the greatest "head coach" in the world.
This will be the ball
>The timer is stopped by the ref everytime the ball is outside the pitch or due to injury/foul
>Game lasts exactly 90 minutes
>If the time is up but the ball is in the air and it scores, the goal is valid
>VAR can change the ref decisions, even without his agreement
>Beer is allowed in every stadium in every country, not just by bullshit Budweiser lobby involvement in the WC
>Armed Forces do a mandatory anthem and fly by every game in every country
>If the time is up but the ball is in the air and it scores, the goal is valid
literally a good idea.
>>substituted players can get back in again
>>teams are allowed 3 timeouts per game
Timeouts and rolling subs would make the game better to be honest
>ball
>round
Not american enough.
>goalkeeper can run around the pitch while holding the ball with his hands but the danger is that no foul against him will get penalized
>every team can decide the size of their goals, but with decreasing size the team can put less players on the field
>kneeling, even if only to tie your shoes, is forbidden and punished with a 5 game ban
>goalkeeper can run around the pitch while holding the ball with his hands but the danger is that no foul against him will get penalized
>every team can decide the size of their goals, but with decreasing size the team can put less players on the field
huh? Neither of those sound American at all
why not?
Because it is too retarded. Never go full retard.
>game is played in quarters instead of halves
>after each quarter every player must eat a big burger, refusing to eat it gets a player ejected and fined by the league. not being able to finish the burger before the ad break is over results in a "personal foul" and 5 minutes in the penalty box (which is now a zone for penalized players, not the area in which a foul results in a penalty)
>which is now a zone for penalized players, not the area in which a foul results in a penalty
Would unironically watch
I can’t tell if you guys are being sarcastic or not but these all sound like good changes
>fans chants are not allowed in the arena, instead of that the stadium will play waka flocka to fans dance during the timeout
Can't make this shit up
>El americANO señores
*were
> players are required to wear body armor.
I like this
The game consists entirely of setpieces. Everytime the ball changes possession to the opposing team, the game is stopped, an advert is shown and the team in possesion of the ball take a free kick.
Literally obvious improvements
every game must be preluded by a 10-minute solo singing session of the American anthem by an african-american woman regardless of whether the game is in America.
is beer not allowed in stadiums in other countries?
>Carrying guns by the fans is allowed as long as they have a permit and they are good guys
Obviously not, because drunk idiots tend to do drunk idiotic shit, which leads to excessive violence inside the stadiums.
This is why in Brazil's WC budweiser selling beer due to money was absolute horseshit.
you're the only sudaca i trust to carry guns, chile
banning alcohol was stupid, people just drink at bars outside the stadium before the match and arrive already drunk
ITT: 3rd worlders actually come up with ways to make soccer better and more enjoyable
A poormans sport can only get better from rockbottom
is as round as americans
>United States
>Latin America
Every time
we're full of spics now, get with the times grandpa
10/10
Also; Game stopped every ten minutes for hotdog and soda buying break.
>Poor man's sport
>Most popular sport in the world by far
game is divided in 6 times
each mid time last 30 minutes worth of ads
game starts on saturday night and ends on monday morning
That's because we have strict gun laws, carrying guns is not allowed unless you are police or do security related job, and only while doing said job withing the job area limits (like a bodyguard or a security firm refilling atm's). Sports and hunters are also allowed but with limited firepower.
People can have only hand guns for self defense in houses, and it is deterred because usually gun owners brag about them "My house is safe!!" which ends up in being overheard, followed, then when the house is identified perps break in and steal the gun when it's empty, which ends up in the black market for narcos.
Thus cops always have campaigns about giving guns to them, no questions asked, which end up destroyed and melted.
We even have the same rules applied to tazer guns, you need a permit to carry those and the same psychiatric tests and courses to wield it properly are required, but at least you can have them with you at all times, max 3. Pepper spray is ok though, you just need your ID to purchase them, although afterwards you can sell it or give it away (it could be used to commit a crime, but a kitchen knife is easier to get)
Exactly, user. Attracts the lowest common denominator.
Then that's the problem within the stadium itself, if they can't control entrance and allow drunk idiots in then they shouldn't be allowed to pla with fans until security measures are enforced. It's simple: fan reeks of alcohol, no entrance allowed, if he insists, offer him to blow an alcohol test to pass, he gets upset and violent, arrest him (because there are cops not just security)
>Illegal to have some drinks while enjoying a sporting event
>Literally monitor everything the public does
I find your lack of freedom disturbing. And you call us a police state. I'd unironically rather get shot
Mexico has strict gun laws too.
NFL fans surely look like the elite of society
>Get Shot
every time the ball goes out of bounds or a player is offside, cut you a commercial break
Mexico and Colombia are countries at war; although a peace agreement was reached recently in Colombia. These statistics probably consider murders committed by drug cartels the same as murders committed by average citizens
get shot again
Yeah but they don't count because their corrupt police and narco state actually don't enforce them so it's the same as not having them.
>players can tackle eachother
No user. Let people drink. Plenty of people drink and never get into fights. If you do get into a fight, drunk or not, then you never set a foot in a stadium again, done.
it's not the same as not having them since the normal law-abiding citzens can't get guns, only criminals.
...
aka "Power break"
you have to clap if the opponent team scores
>>The timer is stopped by the ref everytime the ball is outside the pitch or due to injury/foul
>>Game lasts exactly 90 minutes
Never understood why this isn't done. I want to know exactly how much time is left.
that wouldn't be too bad
>all banter is replaced with hilarious jokes like "I hope [ENTER FRANCHISE HERE] lower my coffin when I die so they can let me down one last time!" and images like pic related