>I wouldn't be able to do it. I would be worried that when my mind is empty I might be dead.
This is hard as fuck to explain, but I'm going to give it a shot.
Stopping thinking doesn't mean you stop feeling you are there.
I've practiced mindfulness meditation on and off for about 3 years, and the feeling you get and "not being there" are complete, absolute opposites, if anything you are more conscious of the fact that you are actually there.
Here comes the mumbo jumbo but seriously, it's the only way I think I can explain it.
Imagine you are in a machine, the machine has levers, pulls, buttons, you name it, each one of them has a red light on it, when the light is turned on, you have to activate whatever is signaled.
You are always in this machine, always, and you must do all of that, when you don't you feel disappointed, or sad, or frustrated, sometimes you forget to press a button or pull a lever and it pisses you off.
In reality, you are the one turning on the lights, your mind is handling the controls, you are thinking about today, you are also thinking about that thing you should do, that thing you should stop doing, worries, anxiety, fears, desires etc.
And there is no order in this! No order whatsoever, it's like being trapped in a storm of yourself, the storm is fierce here and there, calm at times, but the storm doesn't stop.
Unless you actually try to make it stop, that's what meditation is.
(cont)