How do you response in this scene?

How do you response in this scene?

By taking Dicaprio in choke hold and forcing him to buy the pen

>"Hey, do you need to write something? I have this pen to sell. It's not a nice pen but it does the job, just like your mom. And you love your mom, don't you?

OMAEOWA SHINDERU
*teleports behind Leo*
Heh... so you think I can't sell you this pen...
*unsheats cock*
*slowly pull down Leos pants
Yare yare daze....
*jab into his ass and start fucking an mach 10*
FEEL THE POWER OF MY ROD
*explode into his ass*
Heh.... didnt expect that did ya...
*throw the pen on his curcled together and crying shape*
You should have known who you were messin' with, twerp.
*take 5 bucks out of his wallet and walk away with Bee Gees Stayin' Alive on my walker headphones*

DUDE JUST SCREAM A LOT

>"mask u sumn"

[Unzip dick]
This comes free with the pen

if you buy this pen for $1, you will recieve $10

>Democrat economics

Why don't you take that fuckin' pen and shove it up your ass, you fuckin' jag-off.

>"Okay, that will be $1.50."

>pen is worth $2 after regulations and taxes
>sell it for $3

Am i sales man now

>And of course, your mom would want you to buy this pen and reply to this post so she doesn't die in her sleep tonight

Dr. Belfort, I'm P-E-N

>Stick pen in ass
>"Go ahead and sniff it"

>if you don't buy this pen your mother will die in her sleep tonight

Checkmate, atheists.

This pen? No. You don't want this pen. Definitely not. It's the high-end model. Limited-edition. We really only sell these to out most trusted, long-term clients. I think it's better we start you out with a more consumer grade writing device before we bring out the big guns. Honestly, I shouldn't even be talking to you about this pen. I could get in trouble with my supervisor. This is just the floor model anyway. We don't even sell them individually. They come in pairs; one for use, one for display.

he should have been the main character. much more interesting than the other losers.

is that a jojo reference

The difficult part is the scenario. The buyer giving you the product to sell to them. It doesn't work that way.

You immediately feel obligated because they just gave you something for free.

I would say how awesome the pen is and how thankful I am to them. I would say it is a great pen and important to have one when you need it now and in the long term. I would give it back to him.

I would then tell him about an investment opportunity that is remarkably similar to the pen in a common area often overlooked by other investors.

This pen? You want it? It's yours, my friend, as long as you have enough rubies!

you can meet the love of your life (or the hottest chick you ever hwd a chance to fuck) anywhere at any time. she could be here, at this very seminar right now!

what are you gonna do when you ask for her number? you gonna open up your phone and add her as a contact like some nerd? No, you gotta be romantic and have her write her number on your arm or a napkin or something, just like her romance movies. so tell me, do you have a pen on you or do you need to buy one?

How are you planning to do the rest of this demonstration without this pen

This is a nice pen.

>fuck off, we live in a paperless society