Be bong in America

>be bong in America
>decide to go to the local kinoplex
>arrive to find everyone else in casual dress
>nobody else even in a tie
>confused, I go to the Budwieser® Ticket Office to check I'm in the right place
>apparently I am, ask for one ticket
>she says if I'm alone I have to go to the "singles section"
>wtf
>get my ticket and try to find the hog roast
>all they have at the Verizon® Food Counter are crab legs
>need to wash them down, ask to see the wine list
>no wine list
>ask where the gentleman's smoking lounge is
>no gentleman's smoking lounge
>wtf
>decide to just go to my Coke Zero® seat
>for some reason everyone has a falcon, I can hear them sniggering because I don't
>sit down between two fat neckbeards
>movie starts
>crowd applauds
>Jonah Hill comes on
>crowd applauds
>try to start a chorus of "HE'S BIG, HE'S WIDE, HE'S CRYING INSIDE"
>nobody joins in
>State Farm®: Like a Good Neighbour, State Farm Is There!© shooter arrives
>crowd applauds
>get shot
>mfw

>having a shooter instead of a mounted fox hunt

>pre-movie mounted fox hunt
>followed by tea and biscuits
>movie starts
>sound is disabled on the movie, it is instead narrated by Sir David Attenborough
>everyone accompanied by an English Foxhound, either your own or provided by the kinoplex
>all movies have an intermission for more tea and biscuits and a pint of beer
>roast servings for everyone free of charge
>at the end of the movie a muslim immigrant blows himself up, killing everyone

the part on how corporate cucked americans are is true

>Muslim immigrant
>in post-Brexit Britain

What do you think we are, French?

>tfw only seats left on opening night are by the Muslim pens

I had to go to see Star Wars again, all I got was goats screaming and the smell of onion bahjis

>all the immigrants were immediately thrown out following Brexit
lmao

WE CAN DREAM DAMMIT

Calling bullshit on this story. No uninitiated bong would ever pass penis inspection.

My point is you're gonna need a new meme, the "le mudslimes" bit is obsolete since the British public resoundingly chose the red pill

You do know they remain immigrants, even if they're not deported, right?
And the British government isn't going to deport every single muslim in the country just because of Brexit.

If we're talking about hard facts then my argument gets easier. When was the last terrorist bombing in the UK? Dipshit.

>be bong
dealt a losing hand 2bh

>getting this upset over a meme
t. mudslime

They're too busy fucking all of your children to bomb anything.

>carries on with an argument over several posts
>gets BTFO
>"WHOA DUDE CALM DOWN CAN'T BELIEVE YOU GOT SO TRIGGERED THERE LMAO"

>cinema shootout begins
>big brother picks me to go in goal

>muslim immigrant
Muslims are no longer the immigrants infidel, we are the heirs to this nation.

>gets BTFO
Just like your daughters lmao

What kind of kinoma doesn't even have popcorn mines or theater lakes?

>Picked last always

>ywn see a series of movies set in the kinoverse.

>Go to theater in bongland (they spell it theatreuere)
>Carrying a plastic spoon to eat my crab legs
>Big brother security x-ray camera detects it
>Get arrested and converted to islam

I'm afraid a smarter user beat you to the punch there, and you clearly copied them. Run along now, you need to go pick up your wife from Jamal's house

>Run along now, you need to go pick up your wife from Jamal's house
Nice projection.
Has your government forced you to convert to Islam yet?

Literally all you do is copy other anons, who themselves are just rehashing the one stale meme they know

>working class theaters

Ugh, disgusting

>implying all the posts in this thread aren't mine
>implying your posts aren't made by me
I honestly can't believe how upset you got for someone making fun of islamic terrorists.
Do you get cuts when it's windy outside with skin that thin?

That delusion. You still live in ghettos.

>implying we're not one and the same person

>implying we aren't

>implying I didn't make you

>implying I couldn't unmake you

>tfw I forgot my plane falcon to my flight this morning

>implying I couldn't unmake your unmaking

The year of the meme continues. This is Kek's world now

No, we're just on Sup Forums

>implying you aren't me pretending to be other people
>implying I couldn't delete your posts to delete myself from this thread

kys posho

>no theatre dress code

America was a mistake

*thread CPR*

Oh, you're right, you just call them Britons now.

>be finfag in 'murica
>go to local finnkino to watch some Forgotten Soldier (1955) and get wasted
>no wolves allowed, falcons ok
>spirit wolves ok fuck me
>I'm asked to hand over all alcohol over 16%
>a family of eight different coloured blobs of fat is asked to come over and smash my five litres of vodka and long drink coctails
>their fucking kids pester me until I let them use my anvil
>tfw I didn't buy trash pass
>cleaning sharp glass and vodka
>start getting wounds and drunk, rolling in glass, lose my one good pair of pants
>falcons swoop on me while people laugh at the pantless finn
>piss on myself thinking I can still make it to the showers and clean myself
>I'm not allowed in because the glass puncturing my skin is counted as knives and I smell like piss
>I'm given the choice to be the designated shooter and I take it because SISUA PERKELE
>tfw the suicide bomber kit
>my spirit bear saves me: it was all a dream

Oh honey, immigration will still continue, just not from white nations.

Does this mean more Americans will try to get in?

>ask to see the wine list
*patrician chuckle*