Things that just instantly ruin a movie for you

things that just instantly ruin a movie for you.
i'll start
>main character is a woman

why would that ruin the movie for you?

>things that just instantly ruin a movie for you.
Oh I was not expecting that…that little gust my dear….you caught me off guard…yes…so gentle it was though…hmmmm…let me taste this little one…just one small sniff…..sniff…ah….ssssssnnnnnniiiiiffffffffffff…and yet…so strong…yes…the odor….sniff sniff…hmmm….is that….sniff….hmmm….I can almost taste it my dear…..yes….just…sniff….a little whiff more if you please…..ssssssnnnnnniiiiiffffffffff…ah yes I have it now….yes quite….hhhhmmmm…delectable my dear…..quite exquisite yes…..I dare say…sniff….the most pungent one yet my dear….ssssnnnnniiiifffffffffffffffffffffff….yes….

BRRRRAAAAAAAAAAPPPP

mmmmmm-mmmm-mm.... it's time... all those taco bell buffets, paying off... i'm ready

PFFFFTT

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hold it in... i beg you my dear.... you must... please... hold it in till we get to my bowl.... i know that was a lot... of taco bell.. oh your tummy must hurt so.... almost there... oh yes, there it is, my bowl

BBBRRRRAAEEEEEEERRRRRRRRLRLLLLLTTTTPRPPPTRRR BRRRAAAAAAAAAAAP BRAPAPAPAPRRPRRTTT PFFFTTTTTLLLR PFFFT PFFFFT

mm, o hthe smell, sweet and tangy... glazed in dirito dust, from the locos tacos, mixed in with the feast oh so heavinly... oh, so many bits and pieces... mmm, i can't resist, it's time to eat!

GLORPGLORPGLORPGLORPGLORPGLORPGLORPGLORPGLORPGLORPGLORP mmm yes my dear GLORPGLORPGLOPRGLORPpostively scrumtious, oh i must have more

BBBRAAAAAAAAAAPAPPPHLLHHHLHLLTLTTTTTRT

GLORPGLORPGLORPGLORP-thank you my dear GLORPGLORPGLORPGLORP this is a heavenly treat GLORPGLORPGLORPGLORPGLOPRGLORPGLORPGLORPGLORP mmmm oh yes GLORPGLORP smorgasboard

SSSSSLLLLUUUUUUUUUUUURRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRPPPPPPPPPPPPPP

All done

- That'd do the trick.

>movie features a nigger

>character dates a woman
>she's not a virgin

why would I want to watch a movie about a cuck?

So you didn't like Alien.

>characters meet
>cut to sex scene

The main character was the ship

>A black guy appears on screen and he's not a violent retard

maybe he is not a woman?

>gay character's aren't sick with AIDs and pedofiles

I hate when movie trying to have a deep message or original ideas by literally speaking it to you like you are some idiot. When characters talking not like human beings but ideologies itself. Or like Nolan's dialogues. Just try to be subtle ffs

>Name of the main character is literally in the movie name

who isn't a woman?

>main character is a normie
>main character is fit
>main character is in relationship with a girl
>main character does shit like not killing a villain because it would make him just like the villain

women aren't interesting

>woman is polite to male character
>he doesn't spend the rest of the film fantasizing about being in a relationship with her

why not?

>main character does shit like not killing a villain because it would make him just like the villain
This. Whenever someone knocks out a bad guy or shoots him in the leg and then walks off without double tapping I triggers me so hard.

>it's about middle-class ennui
>the main character has an active social life but is still presented as lonely and misunderstand

not an argument

>op is from Sup Forums

I dislike graphic sex scenes in general. I don't want an erection when I'm trying to watch a film, I don't see how it adds anything to the experience

>scroll past this as fast as possible
>still glance the word 'buffet'
God damn it

I think you're confusing Sup Forums with /r9k/.

You're just not, deal with it, nobody gives a shit about women and their pathetic lives.

>gunfight in a room
>they are still able to hear ok afterwards

>bomb/grenade goes off and hero survives
>still able to hear a pin drop

>you're not
>why?
>CAUSE YOUR NOT

Truly convincing. You must be a movie critic, given your intellect.

It's a reboot directed by Paul Feig that shits all over the original series

We're not having an argument, you're just not interesting, fuck off.

>movie push interracial/white guilt/muh shoah/feminist propaganda
literaly most of the nowadays movies

Ghostbusters was fucking gay to begin with who cares

I know we're not having an argument, you're completely incapable of answering questions.

Ripley was the main character and you know it.

Oh I'm capable, I'm just not gonna waste my time doing so because you're not interesting to talk to.

Unlike you and this thread, which are fascinating.

Seriously, so many mental problems to choose from.

whatever you have to tell yourself user.

this desu, there's like 5 movies with women protags that don't suck

>female character does not wear size 6 shoes.
literally ruined movies for me

Texting or talking in the movie theater.

>Movie panders to the lowest common denominator: chinks

That's nigs, they don't have enough money to make it economically viable though they keep trying

that's not what lowest common denominator means user

at least niggers can speak English (more or less) so the movies marketed to them have some dialogue. ching chongs just watch movies for the pretty explosions so all dialogue is slandered

what does it mean

Sup Forums is full of virgins who are resentful against women

>main character is a woman
>she doesn't fart ONCE in the entire flick

pipe down roastie before you taste the flesh of my backhand

>Supporting character is a woman with red hair who becomes world's most famous scientist because her dad sent her messages from behind a 12 dimensional bookcase via a conveniently placed wormhole using time-travel, telepathy and a pocket watch allowing her to solve an impossible formula which literally saves humanity.

>character can meet a girl so easily
>director makes it look as if it's the easiest thing in the world

Meanwhile irl women are walking around like ultra cunts that hate the presence of men

they just don't like you, most men get on fine with women

Hahaha nice joke user...
This... was a joke, right?

>Character does [THING] to advance plot, without any real reason for doing so.

>animated
>musical
>main character is a child
>movie heavily features children and requires them to perform lots of dialogue with actual actors
>CGI blood
>PG-13 rating (if it's a horror film)
>directed by Gareth Edwards
>movie stars a meme actor from GoT or TWD

More like all they want to do is talk about the most mundane shit 99% of the time

That explains transformers

>main character is a white woman
>her love interest is a white man, and not a superior black bull

wonder what the age range for people making these kinds of posts is.

Yeah you're probably right. Maybe it's for the best, I could never degrade myself just for the off chance of getting some tail

This desu familia.

- cliches and overtly dramatic acting in totally mundane scenes
- characters look perfect all the time
- unnatural looking lighting in every scene
- overdone color correction
- generic, forgettable soundtrack

>main character is a straight white male

you motherfuckers can't enjoy a movie unless the main character is basically you or your idealized version of yourself, fucking turboplebs honestly

spotted the roastie

films that act as a mirror into your own soul are the most beautiful films

Cuck

>not appreciating that the best narratives are a reflection of the audience
fucking pleb faggot, even shakespeare knew this shit

>main character is a woman
>she doesn't hate every other woman she meets

>Sony pictures presents

>not liking kill bill
>not liking Alien

I smell a pleb

People behaving incredibly irrationally to the point that it's ridiculous.
Someone told me to watch the 100.
When they first arrive on Earth, one of the FIRST THINGS they do is fight among each other.
FOR NO FUCKING REASON other than the writer's needing to establish the assholes of the story.
DROPPED.

>it doesn't have 2 women talking to each other about something other than a man

>Bad guys talk about the vile evil acts they're about to commit just so we know they're the bad guys

>main character is an african american who got the part because they are an african american rather than because they were the best choice for the role

Seriously, I'm all for having black people in flims but it's got to be through talent and not nepotism

the "paid" range, I'd say... it's too coordinated

>supporting character is literally perfect

this

>all these females

>arrive on rich bountiful new place
>establish handy and practical rules, regulations, and suggestions
>character overreacts vastly
>he is the good guy

Or worse:
>Black and white men in competition with each other
>Black man is calm and dignified and wears sweaters
>White man acts like an IRL black man

They do this because people perceive it as "smart."
Spring Breakers was a film with miles of subtext, but it was declared stupid because the characters don't sit around talking about its ideas.
Inception was a shallow popcorn film but the characters say pseudointellectual shit about dreams and reality so it's "smart".

I'm not even trying to be a special snowflake but in all honesty I have never seen a movie where a character was like myself.

>mc is a "nerd" who is 7/10+ with decent social skills
>shoe horned minorities for marketing purposes
>any type of ideology being rammed down my throat
>watching it with people who won't shut the fuck up
>muh strong independent woman
>female characters who fall for a beta with oneitis

>implying ships arent female

>watching it with people who won't shut the fuck up

same, this is the reason i don't go to comedies in theatre

Name one movie that does this

>Wilhelm scream
>main character losing fight with bad guy, gets saved by sidekick/heroine with gun
These are two of my least favourite things.

>watching movie on airplane
>shown at incorrect aspect ratio
>literally walk out

HAHAHA

B-BUT MUH CHEERIOS!!!

>in the heat of the night

I'm laughing

Eternally btfo

>movie features a "diverse" multiracial cast, but they all have the exact same cookie cutter hipster personality and they dress the same and act the same and have the same PC opinions on everything

name 78 movies

...

>the only one who doesn't have said personality is the white guy who's arrogant and kinda racist, but comes around towards the end and realizes he was wrong the whole time

Something that pisses me off is when a movie uses popular music, or a popular band's music to set the tone of the scenes rather than relying on the actor's performances.

One example is when film makers use Joy Division or the Smiths, it is always used to set a dark/melancholy mood but the actors fail to achieve it based on their abilities.

It's a clear sign of lazy film making, and poor acting.

Any time travel other than going into the future.

...