Stephen 'Brazen Bull' Segal

Steven Segal is to Martial Arts as is _______ is to Acting

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a bass solo

Steven Segal

what are you talking about? a bass solo is completely irrelevant to the discussion

Tommy Wiseau

>We will never witness Trump president with Seagal as his vice Pres

Life is suffering

>illegal spics getting their birthdays snatched
terrifying prospect desu

Acting

...

/thread

*teleports behind illegal alien*

*unsheathes katana*

hmm, nothing personel

>slow guys starts to unleash katana
>fat guy slowly walks towards you
>you have a gun
>you decide that the best case of action is to charge at him


who directed this?

>*unholsters longslide*
>*snaps safety off*

Steven Seagal, of course.

a guy named Keoni Waxman who apparently directs all Seagal's movies

Theres two things you could tell from that scene

1. That Stephen is very proud of that take

2. that the black guy's confusion in real life to that take got spliced to that scene

>WHEN SOMEONE STEALS THE LAST COOKIE

this

>There are a lot of different methods of making movies now. They use a lot of special effects. People don’t have to be an action guy or a hero or a martial artist, they just get up there and let everybody spend the money and the time with special effects.

>Look at Liam Neeson. He can’t fight, he’s not an action guy at all and he’s getting action movies now, so that should tell you something. He’s a great dramatic actor, a great guy. Is he an action guy? No. Is he a great fighter, a great warrior? No. Let’s be honest.”

Should I keep posting kino Seagal clips?

grunge.com/29030/untold-truth-steven-seagal/
fightstate.com/the-8-most-cringeworthy-things-about-steven-seagal-that-he-doesnt-want-you-to-know/
manlymovie.net/2014/12/things-you-didnt-know-about-steven.html

>was a navy seal
>does special favors for the CIA
>single handedly scared of Yakuza
>trained Anderson Saliva
>can never be choked
>is believed by thousands to be the true last samurai in plural form
>is a reincarnated 17th century monk
>skin is virtually indestructible

can you name a greater anime battle?

youtube.com/watch?v=i_-MXLG_i-c

The CIA story is true

>"In Asia, you'd be amazed how many people are connected with the agency," Seagal explained one night on the film set in Chicago, where he was fighting off a migraine headache. "A lot of the American military has been over there since the occupation and they've become very connected to the intelligence community.

>"These guys were my students. They saw my abilities, both with martial arts and with the language. My CIA godfather told me he'd never heard any American speak Japanese so well. I would say I was a prime candidate to be recruited."

>"You can say that I lived in Asia for a long time and in Japan I became close to several CIA agents," he said, choosing his words carefully. "And you could say that I became an adviser to several CIA agents in the field and, through my friends in the CIA, met many powerful people and did special works and special favors."

>Seagal declined to offer many details, refusing to cite specific missions or locales. However, when asked about the authenticity of a scene in "Above the Law" that shows an intelligence operative injecting a rival with a deadly chemical truth serum, Seagal said: "That's not made up. That's something that really happened."

Isn't he a rapist?

>Steven "grab them by the punani" Seagal

do you think he keeps the coat on during sex?

...

that's hot

DEYTUUKER

>Steven "I wear two watches as an operator because every other operator totally does that" Segal
where's my favorite clip of him?

>room looks like oval office set
seriously, just look at this shit

Is it true that the Russian mafia finances his movies?

spbp

baldie

Segal is the Nicholas Cage of the Martial Artist actors group, Van Damme is Travolta, and Liam Neeson is Chuck Norris.

He is literally THAT kid.

how do i become like him?

keep goin user these are golden

Do you have any from the army movie?

youtube.com/watch?v=2b5bG8Rcpxo

>that license plate

...

Is this dumb appearence based on someone? The beard, shades, backward baseball cap. Not the first time I see it.

Honest question - why was he so popular in the 2000s? He can't act. His martial arts skills are questionable. And he's probably among the 500 least attractive people in Hollywood. Why was he so sought after?

...

He wasn't.

He was popular and sought after in early to mid 90's

He was already a washed up star by early 00's and did straight-to-dvd garbage flicks by then

youtube.com/watch?v=FTfBH3p1I7k
youtube.com/watch?v=VUoVx7qDBzE

The piece of shit was already using stuntman here?

for him

Anytime Seagal moves its probably a stunt man.

>Marlon Brando

...

except for the love making scenes

somebody post that oen scene from his movie where its clearly not him but a fat guy with a fake beard

>/k/ goes to Iraq

is this erotikino

pure kino

STEVEN SEAGAL THREAD