>Movie begins on present day with Diana living in Paris. Apparently she split after the events of BvS. She gets a letter from Bruce Wayne asking her to join his team and writes him a lenghty e-mail with her life story, which is the framing device of the movie.
>Basically, Zeus creates humanity, Ares gets butthurt and corrupts them with the concept of war, which makes him the strongest god. Zeus creates the Amazons to spread peace, Ares gets double butthurt and enslaves them. Zeus frees them and creates Themyscira, but is then murdered by Ares. Amazons swear off on humanity.
>It's World War I, and Steve Trevor steals a notebook that the Germans have been using to create chemical weapons and flees on a stolen airplane. The Germans catch up to him and both crash-land in Themyscira. The Amazons kill the Germans and arrest Trevor. He says he's trying to stop the war and shows them the book. It has a bunch of spells and Diana deduces Ares is behind the war. The amazons don't want to get involved so Diana volunteers to escort Trevor back to Men's World and stop Ares. Diana steals the Godkiller sword to do so.
>In America Diana befriends Steve's secretary Etta Candy and Steve convinces his superiors that the Germans are creating chemical weapons and is sent to stop them. He assembles a team that includes Diana and Etta as well as a comic relief actor con man played by Ewem Bremner; a sniper played by Saiid Taghmaoui and a Indian smuggler played by Eugene Brave Rock. They are completely useless. They meet up with a wimpy science officer played by David Thewlis.
>Danny Huston is a German officer who wants to take over the world and is really generic. He huffs on a blue gas that gives him superstrength. Elena Anaya is Doctor Poison and is horribly scarred and creating the chemical weapons. She's also kinda useless but at least looks cool.
>Diana and Steve fall in love and Diana fights Danny Huston's men a bunch of times. In one such attack Etta is killed and Diana wants to ragequit humanity. The tone is fairly bleak and dark and Diana kills A LOT of people. Mostly in slow-mo.
>Long story short the mystic chemical weapon that Doctor Poison created for Ares causes people to go berserk on each other. It will make everyone kill each other and make Ares super-mega-powerful.
>Diana and her crew attack the German outpost and Diana quickly disposes of Danny Huston. It turns out Thewlis was Ares all along. He gets super-buff and destroys the Godkiller and sends out a plane to spread the gas all over the world.
>Ares beats Diana and reveals that she's the actual daughter of Zeus rather than being a clay statue brought to life by him as her mother had told her. He says humans are only capable of war and that's why he'll win.
>Steve saves Diana and tells her he loves her then jumps into the plane and flies it way above the camp. Steve then shoots the fuel tank thus blowing himself up to destroy the gas. Diana gets pissed and tells Ares that he's wrong because humans are also capable of love.
>It turns out Diana is the Godkiller and not her sword. She bangs her bracelets together and creates an energy blast that incinerates Ares's body and traps him back in the Tartarus. The world is saved and Diana chooses to stay and help as it is her duty.
>Over time other wars happen and she decides humans are dicks regardless of Ares and just sorta' quits.
>Diana finishes her e-mail by saying Superman's death has shown her people are capable of being good and accepts to join Batman's team. She then hears about a flaming building nearby and springs to help.
Eli Ortiz
>She gets a letter from Bruce Wayne asking her to join his team and writes him a lenghty e-mail with her life story, which is the framing device of the movie.
Adrian Lee
Jesus this is what a 10 year olds first creative essay starts.
Ethan Wood
A FUCKING E-MAIL
Levi Taylor
>No cameos other than Barry Allen and Arthur Curry being namedropped on the e-mail exchange.
>Connie Nielsen and Robin Wright are also pretty wasted as Diana's mother and aunt. Especially Wright who only gets like three scenes.
>Action is mostly good though it overuses slow-motion.
>Ares is mostly CGI in his final form. He has an armor; a horned helmet; a long cape; a big-ass sword and a shield that gets bigger to protect his full body if necessary.
>Humor is sparse and hit and miss. There's some genuinely funny scenes and some not so much.
>There's a scene where Steve and Diana are sharing a boat on the way back to Men's World and end up lying next to each other. Diana tells Steve her background and how's she was brought to life by Zeus from a clay statue and whatnot. Steve asks her if she even knows what sex is. She doesn't.
>In another scene Diana inquires Steve about what his wristwatch is. He tells her it's a device to keep time and know when to wake up or eat. She's puzzled someone would let a machine tell them when to do these things.
>Chris Pine as Steve Trevor is the best character in the movie and overshadows Wonder Woman hard at times.
Zachary Carter
>email
holy fuck this is bad
are there shots of wonder woman typing on a keyboard? maybe proofreading a sentence and deciding to erase it?
Julian Ortiz
>Chris Pine as Steve Trevor is the best character in the movie and overshadows Wonder Woman hard at times. that's sexist
Landon Butler
tl;dr: ANOTHER ROTTEN TOMATO
Ethan Myers
Should've opened with Batman fucking Wonderwoman and as they lie in their sex induced ecstasy she tells him her life story.
At the end of the movie, Wonderwman is finishing her story and the camera pans out to reveal Batman has been asleep the whole time which is followed by a laughtrack.
Daniel Gray
>Movie ends with Batman replying back "TL;DR"
Grayson Diaz
>Batman has been asleep the whole time
just like the audiences pretty meta
Isaiah Carter
>The movie is flashbacks
Christian Hill
he even saves her life and then the world despite being mortal while ww is a literal demi-god women BTFO how will they ever recover?
Asher Ramirez
Etta can't die in the middle of the movie because set pictures of a scene where troops were celebrating the end of the war had Etta in it
FAKE NEWS
Camden Richardson
This...
This is bad okay?
But everything else is nice fantasy and it's seems to be fun movie to watch. Nothing too serious.
Matthew Richardson
That was BTS footage.
Brayden Brown
I except feminist critics will be pretty butthurt about that and not even feminism will save it from rotten score
Matthew Peterson
Can the last scene be wonder woman sighing as she gets up to take a slash and the camera stays on bruce's face as he quickly winks at the camera and smirks while wonder woman continues muttering to herself in the background?
Connor Rogers
*expect
William Cruz
>Steve Trevor dies
oh thank holy fuck, Pine ain't strapped to this dead horse.
Jeremiah Carter
The whole dceu is a simulation in miss Martians head and they don't realize it yet, therefore erasing anything we've seen.
Hunter Price
I'm not sure I believe this, but the e-mail bit had me laughing pretty hard, so good job.
Juan Rogers
Yeah believe it or not I have an exclusive leak from a DVD screener of Wonder Woman
There were reports that Warner was thinking of finding a way to bring he back but one of the reasons he signed up in the first place was that his character would die and he would be done with the franchise
Anthony Johnson
...
James Butler
>writes him a lenghty e-mail with her life story, which is the framing device of the movie.
Justin Reyes
>In another scene Diana inquires Steve about what his wristwatch is. He tells her it's a device to keep time and know when to wake up or eat. She's puzzled someone would let a machine tell them when to do these things. no wristwatch aint gon tell this strong independent woman what to do
Tyler James
>Diana finishes her e-mail by saying Superman's death has shown her people are capable of being good and accepts to join Batman's team.
Diana, you're like hundreds of years old and you cant discern that people are capable of both good and evil? And how would Superman's sacrifice convince her? He's an alien.
Xavier Robinson
>it worked for deadpool so why not?
Robert Butler
And no one else has sacrificied themselves for the good in 100 years
Brody Sanchez
>Implying Aliens aren't all the same species
Human is just a planetality. Steve and Kal-El are the same species, and Kal-El was raised on Earth so he is Human.
Luke Allen
>the entire movie takes place inside a fucking email
Daniel Myers
It's simple. Superman died for our sins.
Thomas Phillips
>watch old sci-fi movie >aliens are called humans
seriously, why?
Colton Garcia
doesn´t sound like anything I would want to watch
Leo Bennett
they must use a lot of emojis
also lots of instant messaging and social media cutaways too
Nathaniel Stewart
>Ares murdered Zeuz
Aaron Flores
>airplane carrying a bunch of weapons of mass destruction, set to be released all over the world >Steve confesses to his love interest and hijacks the plane after the confrontation with the villain >Steve flies the plane on a suicide mission to make sure the weapons can't be used >Steve destroys the plane and presumably himself to save the world from the Germans.
Quick, what movie am I talking about?
Isaiah Reed
why didnt they give her blue contacts?
Christian Turner
Cronos sends his regards!
Austin Torres
Sounds bullshit but I'll take the bait
Are the action scenes better than this, fakenewsbro?
Angel Thomas
...
Hudson Wright
So. It's literally America Saves The Day: Again?
Okay.
Isaiah Smith
Looks good
i will be watching in my local kinema
Michael Jackson
>4 cuts in 2 sec
BRAVA MARVALA
Blake Roberts
...
Brody Nguyen
Sounds... good actually, but I'm not sure Gadot can pull this off
Henry Nelson
The Dark Knight Rises
Bentley Powell
>they released this on theaters >they paid reviews until they got to believe it wasn't a piece of shit
Say what you will about DC, at least they are honest about their movies being trash
Luke Butler
>America Saves The World >British Guy Is Actually The Bad Guy >Ares is fucking Khorne
What is it with soulless boring execs?
Jordan Rivera
>The tone is fairly bleak and dark and Diana kills A LOT of people. Mostly in slow-mo.
Kino.
Oliver King
>Sounds... good
I didn't even read it and I agree
Liam Flores
stop lying
Henry White
Oh good, for a minute I was afraid it wouldn't be generic crap
Daniel Gray
>swn be your mommy I want to die.
Landon Watson
>wanting a skeleton for a mommy
Juan Jones
You forgot:
>assembled a diverse cast to fight a world war >a german science man created a bio-weapon
Evan Green
that sounds fucking horrible, even for dc
will probably still manage a 62 on retard tomatoes cuz DUDE WOMEN LMAO
Jacob Anderson
>Steve Trevor steals a notebook that the Germans have been using to create chemical weapons and flees on a stolen airplane. >The Germans catch up to him and both crash-land in Themyscira. >It has a bunch of spells and Diana deduces Ares is behind the war
So it's just a complete coincidence that he steals a piece of proof that Ares created WWI and then crashes on literally the only patch of otherwise entirely secluded rock on the planet earth where people know who Ares is and have the power to defeat him?
Owen Ramirez
...
Sebastian Myers
Coincidence is a word that stupid people use when they mean "destiny"
Zachary Wright
Marvel Reddit Quipiverse winss'a again!!
Charles Parker
...
Owen Smith
WE HAVE GOOD FRIEND MEME POTENTIAL BOYS
Aaron Wright
>>Basically, Zeus creates humanity, Ares gets butthurt and corrupts them with the concept of war, which makes him the strongest god. Zeus creates the Amazons to spread peace, Ares gets double butthurt and enslaves them. Zeus frees them and creates Themyscira, but is then murdered by Ares. Amazons swear off on humanity.
Fuck this looks too good for capeshit, are they going to show it LotR style or just tell it?
Aaron Harris
Eh, if the rest of the movie was fine, I could give this a pass since it gets the plot moving, and once in a lifetime coincidences like that aren't all too uncommon in movies, and most other media for that matter.
Nicholas Cook
>>Humor is sparse
When did it become a rule that superhero movies have to be funny?
Grayson Evans
>reveals that she's the actual daughter of Zeus rather than being a clay statue brought to life by him as her mother had told her.
Of all the things to stay true to the comics on.
Nathan Foster
I dunno, when was Blade 2 made
Gavin Hill
When action became this
Eli Rodriguez
I'm sure it will all be crunched into the first 5 minutes of the movie and never referenced to again.
Brandon Morgan
>German officer wants to take over the world >ares tells Diana humans are all evil >Diana says he's wrong and that humans are capable of love Good fucking God, why do superhero movies try to be as cliche as possible. You're telling me these Warner bros hacks couldn't think of anything better. Why can't superhero movies have an interesting story with complex characters. This garbage looks even worse than suicide squad
Asher Jackson
Ben could actually make that work.
Owen Carter
...
Henry Lopez
Sounds like a percy jackson flick tbqh
Xavier Martinez
>WWI American superhero movie >The main characters are all french
Make your own superhero movies with your own countries superheros. Oh wait
Jack Ramirez
Considering it's fucking Wonder Woman and previous DC grim fests have been executed horribly, some levity might be the only thing they wouldn't fuck up, if they at least attempted it.
Xavier Ward
DCEU strikes again
Jaxon Morris
>The tone is fairly bleak and dark and Diana kills A LOT of people
I can already hear the critics losing their shit because of this.
Aaron Hughes
...
Jason Brooks
>Etta is killed kek
get fucked DCEU
Wyatt Morgan
rightfully so
NEW 52 JOHNS' WONDER WOMAN WAS SHIT
Isaiah Morris
>A FUCKING EMAIL
Aaron Allen
Wonder Woman has killed way before New 52.
Dominic Russell
Pathetic DC Defense Force, absolutely pathetic
Thomas Thomas
>Last scene >WW finishes writing her email and sends it to batman >takes 30 seconds to reply >''k''
Easton Rodriguez
>The entire assembly process for the Justice League is done through e-mails
BRAVO DC
Eli Brown
They know people will watch Wonder Woman and Cyborg regardless, so they can virtue signal
They're saving the good stuff for Aquaman, because everyone has the "lol he talks to fish what a fag" mindset and that's their uphill battle.
Mason Rivera
>Steve saves Diana and tells her he loves her then jumps into the plane and flies it way above the camp. Steve then shoots the fuel tank thus blowing himself up to destroy the gas. Diana gets pissed and tells Ares that he's wrong because humans are also capable of love. >>Diana finishes her e-mail by saying Superman's death has shown her people are capable of being good and accepts to join Batman's team. She then hears about a flaming building nearby and springs to help.
imagine this with Gal Gadot's acting.
this shit will be fucking disastrous. WHY THE FUCK DID THEY CAST GAL GADOT
Sebastian Cooper
She killed people WAY before that.
Wyatt Evans
This sounds horrendous. Like absolutely no lessons learned from BvS or SS.
Brody Peterson
>WHY THE FUCK DID THEY CAST GAL GADOT
She was in the Israeli army, ergo she is powerful and intimidating
Mason Rogers
>some humour >decent plot >awful acting but Pine and the nazi bad guy are fine >slomo > 9000 cuts per second >womyn lead positive bias >DC movie negative bias
Genuinely curious about the reviews
Cooper Perez
>A FUCKING EMAIL
Sebastian Brown
>>>Diana finishes her e-mail by saying Superman's death has shown her people are capable of being good
Dear Diana,
That's literally what I told you at the funeral, stop copying me.
Brayden Ward
>writes him a lenghty e-mail with her life story, which is the framing device of the movie >assembles a team >huffs on a blue gas that gives him superstrength >Mostly in slow-mo. >sends out a plane to spread the gas all over the world. >tells Ares that he's wrong because humans are also capable of love.
Holy fuck just nuke capeshit forever please
Benjamin Rivera
Sounds slightly better than I expected
Camden Price
She killed ONE person: Max Lord Otherwise she only killed supernatural beings or mythological mosnters
You just don't know shit about Wonder Woman and will continue thinking you're right, though
