ITT: Times you acted like James Delaney

>Hanging out with my sister in my room
>"I have a use for you"
>She looks at me funny
>"mhmmmm take off your fucking dress."
>She immediately runs away in disgust
>Later try to use my voodoo powers to fuck her in her dreams
>Blow ash all over my naked body
>Nothing happens

lold

>mmmmmhmm
>'user are you ok you havent said a word in 3 days only grunting'
>mhmm mm
>'oh user im scared we should take you to a doctor. come with me right now'
>mhhmmmm
>'user can you please tell me what seems to be the problem here?
>mmhm mmmm mmmmmmhmhmm
>'im sorry, i didn't understand that. Is this the only noise you can make?'
>mhm
>'user has suffered an acute stroke, i see no other recourse than round the clock care in a proper facility. Full recovery almost certainly impossible'
>mhmmmmmmhm mmmmmhmmmhm mhmm mmmmmhmhmmm

>watching children's cartoon about a penguin
>penguin makes strange noise
>sudden fit of flashbacks about crows and an undead witch
>parents ask me what's wrong
>mhmm, nootka sound

I've unironically started walking like Daleney.

>"I have a use for you"

>mom knocks on door says she wants me to meet my father
>mmmm through the door
>walk out with my trademark daleney walk
>my bare feet slapping on the wooden floor
>stand in front of my father and just stare at him
>only wearing a shirt like Delaney does
>my shirt stops at my hips
>father goes off at mom saying she is a horrible mother
>mhmm, nootka

Anybody know where I can get a half ton of salt peter?

Mmmmmm

>Go to my friends house
>He asks if I want a cup of tea
>"mhmmm I want all the tea in China."

>on a sinking ship
>start nailing boards down
>hit thumb with hammer
>mhmm
>hear screaming and wailing from below
>put on some pants
>crash the ship with no survivors
>swim sea to meet with zulus

>feeling hungry
>put on my trenchcoat, hat and gloves
>go to restaurant
>waitress asks what I want
>mmhmm Nootka
>sir, we don't have that here
>stand up, point at her face and tell her "be veeery careful now"
>manager walks over and asks me if there's anything wrong
>"I have a use for you"
>take out karambit and swiftly cut his heart out
>give it to the waitress
>angrily walk away

>*angrily walk into movie theatre*
>ask for one ticket to the new movie
>girl at the counter asks if there's anything else i'd like
>"mmmmm"
>"mmhmmm"
>uhhh okay sir what would you like?
"mmm... be very... careful.... with what you say... next"
>i'm sorry sir, what would you like exactly?
>"mmm nootka"
>i don't know what that is sir we don't have it
>"mhmmm mmmm mhmm.... powder.... salt peter"
>sorry sir i don't understand, your movie is theater 4
>"mmm i have a use for you"
>she gives me a weird look then dismisses me and asks who's next
>*angrily walk to my movie*

I tried to use my voodoo magic to fuck her in her dreams later but it didn't work.

a menacing waddle?

*unzips karambit*
be very careful now

kek, I need this to be a meme. Delaneyposting? Hardy is truly a meme-master.

mhmm?

>I suggest that you leave this thread very quickly and very quietly or you can stay for the extreme shitposting that is coming your way.

mhmm for you mhmm.

fpbp

mhmm

>yfw no crown's monopoly on sea otter pelts

Nootka

How the hell does Hardy look different in every single movie he is almost unrecognizable to me unless I know it's him

He wears a mask and is a big guy.

>Rape my sister
>She wants to run away with me
>Dump her for a cuter ginger smugfu

how did he peel that egg with those gloves on

lmao that's a perfect description

sounds like stage 4 autism

PPS.

Piss
Pigeon Shit
Stir

I always thought that Hardy looks like the most generic big guy ever. I mean if anybody asks me what a male human looks like I would think of Tom Hardy. He's like epitome of masculinity.

You know that it actually IS manageable, just very tedious and awkward.

Camera trickery.

He plows through at least 6 eggs.

>hm