>be me
>work at a conglomerate sales company, cubicles and shit
>boss starts 'movie day' to incentivize everyone, asks for suggestions for the first movie
>everyone starts shouting shitty ideeas
>"Pulp Fiction!"
>"Taken!"
>I rise and raise my hands in the air, stomping both feet alternately until everyone hushes
>the profound speed with which my legs extended forces my chair twelve feet behind me into the next cubicle over
>look at boss
>"I have a suggestion, hoss"
>everyone's looking at me, they know I've got a good one
>...
>...
>The room is silent
>I say, in a brooding whisper,
>"Drive"
>everyone grows disinterested and sits back down
>I try to stop them by explaining, "no, it's a really good movie with the mass appeal of an action thriller and the european lens of an arthouse-"
>hoss just nods at me and tells me to sit down
>fast forward to wednesday, movie night
>boss comes in with a disc but it's facing away from the group so no one knows what it is
>he plays the disc
>BOLD FILMS logo
>FILM DISTRICT logo
>I know what we're watching
>no one is sitting next to me, can't blame them, i'm an intimidating presence
>boss sits next to me
>1 hour, 42 minutes, and 13 seconds later
>everyone leaves, boss and I are the only ones in the room
>see a tear leave his eye
>I understand
>next day, boss comes in late wearing a fitted v-neck, distressed denim jeans, has a toothpick in his mouth
>see him go into his office
>minutes later, corporate suit goes into boss's office
>the entire office is in suspense
>after my Patek Phillipe watch counts five minutes, hear boss shout to corporate "HOW 'BOUT THIS. YOU SHUT YOUR MOUTH, OR I'LL KICK YOUR TEETH DOWN YOUR THROAT AND SHUT IT FOR YOU"
>Boss storms out with three more toothpicks in his mouth
>get called into the office
>old boss just quit to become a professional Uber
>get offered old boss's job just because I suggested an intellectually profound movie whose message was too great for him to handle
>mfw
Uber
Other urls found in this thread:
youtu.be
youtu.be
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finally a quality op
...
kek quality post
Your boss is named Hoss?
...
>1 hour, 42 minutes, and 13 seconds later
lol
His name is actually Hossling but we call him smelly asshole for short
...
>uber
>men thinking they can drive women around
I am so sick of this rape culture
women should be on top of my pennis because i make the more money
wat the fuck hahhahah
What the fuck's so funny about that, boy?
ewww
Sauce senpai
den 11. time on DR TV
TELL ME ABOUT REFN
WHY DOES HE WEAR THE TOWEL
LOTTA LOYALTY FOR A HIRED GOOSE
...
IF I UNTIED THAT WOULD YOU DIE
sauce
He lost the one he wore during the shooting of TND and henceforth decided not to wear one anymore.
"Throwing Stuff at Abbey Lee" on xvideos
THIS:
youtu.be
this one's the wrong link. sorry bout that
Good post.
I Believe Poppy.
www.projectrabbit.xyz
I love poppy
Poppy is a friggin cocktease.
But Poppy loves you!
>get pulled over
>Watch the police officer enter my information in his cruiser as I chew on my tooth pick
>He approaches me
>License and registration, he says
>Give him both and ask if he wants a toothpick
>He slides his sunglasses down and stares at me
>What the fuck did you just say to me?
>Stare at him autistically for like 30 seconds
>Step out of the car, put your hands on the roof and spread your legs
>I assume the position, he asks me what I do for a living as he frisks me
>... I drive
>He hits me in the back of the head with his night stick and then slams it into my knee
>Dazed and barely conscious, I watch as he snaps my license in half and throws it into my face
>No, no you don't.
>He takes the tooth pick in my mouth that miraculously stayed in through my beating and puts it between his lips, gives me a wink and gives me the ol' shooter McGavin hand gesture before getting in his cruiser and driving off
everybody wants to be Poppy.
>He lost the one he wore during the shooting of TND and henceforth decided not to wear one anymore.
noooooooooooo
I'm not Poppy.
He lost a lot of weight subsequently...
>Nobody likes my oc
I thought it was hilarious but didn't trust that it was OC
Thanks man, even if it was a pity (you).
Does he get away with this because he probably autistic and already has a wife or what?
T'is a pity she was a whore
I'm Poppy.
>tfw you realize that Refn only made TND as a smokescreen in order to get into Elle Fanning's panties.
Also note how he kept repeating that Elle had just turned eighteen during the Cannes press conference. It was as though he wanted to say "It's totally legal now! – Even in the US"
smug bastard.
pretty sure other people on the internet have made the exact same comedically brickwalled observation.
possibly.