ITT: self deprecating jokes about our countries

>Be Panamá
>Get Canal'd

>be french
>surrender

>be danish

>Be British
>Get Canal'd

>be britain
>get Norman'd

>Be American
>live in a collapsing corporatocracy that can't provide basic services to its citizens

>be Estonia
>get annexed by Russia and shot in the head behind a dry toilet

>be america
>even in your death throes youre still better than 92.6% of all extant countries

>be chilean
>eat chilli

>be ireland
>most of it anyway

>be American
>get shot

>be german
>get trucked

>be italian
...
More than enough

>Be American
>Get shot

>be latvian
>get hungry

why didn't the project to do the channel at sea level take off? why the compartments?

>Be Ireland
>Get William'd

>be brazilian
>doesn't have enough monkeys for SOPA

Harold Holt was the 17th Prime Minister of Australia. He died by drowning. In his honour, we opened the Harold Holt Memorial Swimming Centre.

:^)

>be dutch
>drown

Francisco Sá Carneiro was a Portuguese PM who died in a plane crash. Porto's airport is named after him

lel
Sounds like the Portuguese have a decent sense of humour as well.

be Uruguayan(male)
get fuck'd

>be mexican
>get beheaded

The canal project by the French was at sea level. They failed because: diseases, climate, landslides, and lastly but not least embezzlement.

The pic is from the third set of locks (inaugurated last year). The chambers are for recycling water in order to save some of it (actually a lot).

>be korean
>get nuked

>be iceland
>get dane'd

>be American
>be fat

>be American
>become an hero because existence is hollow

>be Filipino

>be American
>be dumb

>be American
>clap

>be American
>0.56% white

>be American

>be """""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""american"""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""
>actually be LOS-statesian

>He died by drowning
we don't know that

>Be Canadian
>Be a FUCKING LEAF

>"The Americans are the living refutation of the Cartesian axiom, "I think, therefore I am": Americans do not think, yet they are. The American 'mind', puerile and primitive, lacks characteristic form and is therefore open to every kind of standardization."

>Be finnish
>people are either massive rednecks or faggots

Evola was a crazy-ass magician

also
>be russian eat vodka for breakfast

Damn

>be russia
>get SOLD

>exaggerating this badly

>be America
>be 60% white

> be Spanish
> lose clay


20% smaller, poorer and browner country by next Monday, lmao

>be Russian

You're doing it wrong, dummies.

>Be Catalonia
>Sell your dignity to kikes

>be russian
>be a nation of useless subhuman alcoholics and prostitutes
>live in dirt and poverty
>get fucked by your own government on a daily basis
>be used as a cannon fodder to protect your Master's mansions
>die from drinking bath lotion while literally pissing and shitting yourself

>be danish
>get bored

>get used as cannon fodder sent to the front lines without any sort of training
>get maimed
>go home
>village and everything around for hundreds of km was burned to the ground because the only way russians can "win" against real armies is by burning everything leading to moscow so they starve to death before they get there
>russian leaders don't mind; they have plenty to eat regardless
I don't envy russian peasantry

>be american
>get shat

>be Italian
>get terrone'd