They say you should never see a grown man cry. Which is why I had my tear ducts removed...

>They say you should never see a grown man cry. Which is why I had my tear ducts removed. I've been crying every minute of my life since, and no one knows the better. Don't let them see you cry, Ray.

>Knock knock, Ray.
>Who's there.
>I'm the fucking door.

How Can Detectives Be True If Our Hearts Aren't True and Crime is Just a bad boy with glass eyes? I want the tit surgery, Ray. And the pusy because I'm a honey in a money suit.

>"I'm not saying a man doesn't make mistakes, what I'm saying is mistakes make the man and
I'm a fucking made man."

>I was never too good at math. Shit, I was terrible in school. I failed calculus three times. But when you've got four dead bodies on your hands, three hours until sunset, and two dirty cops digging through your trash can --- well then the numbers start adding up real fast. I'm talking Road Runner fast. And if you can't put one and two together, and if the guilt you got weighing on your back isn't equal to the unit pressure of four dead men when you divide that heaviness by the surface area of LA -- that's when you know the test's fixed and there ain't no right answer. Just a bunch of fucking equations that all equal a big ugly zero. Like life.

True Detective S2 shitposting was best shitposting. I really hope there's a S3 soon.

Solid kek

Starring Brendan Fraser with Christian Bale.

>Sometimes I feel like I'm walking a mile in somebody else's shoes, Ray. But when the shoe's on the other foot and I've got two left feet, what else am I supposed to do? A fucking handstand?

>My dad was a math teacher, Ray. He used to always tell me when I was acting up that I was being obtuse. Thing is, he's dead now and I'm a fucking rectangle.

Can someone give me a few examples of rustposting? or a link to a thread in the archive?

I don't fucking remember what it was like tbqh

>It's a dog eat dog world, Ray and I'm the fuckin' Chinaman.

>They say it's not how hard you hit that counts it's how hard you can get hit. Well my opponent's Mike Tyson but I'm fucking Ghandi

>They say a broken clock's right twice a day. Well Ray, I may have two hands but I sure as shit don't have a face

S2 would've been better than S1 if rachel McAdams wasn't such a garbage actor

>There's a small cafe near my place, Ray. I've driven by that joint every day for the past 20 years. Then one day I decide to walk in, and you know what I realize? It's a fucking hardware store

copy-fucking-pasted.

this is really good

>threw out all my furniture except my bed
>rented a few psychology and philosophy books at the library
>mom comes into my room and asks what I want for dinner
>tell her "I don't eat".
>she says "But you'll get hungry user, are you trying to lose weight to impress some girl? I think you look fine the way you are." (I'm 235lbs)
>I look out the window and whisper "I have seen the finale of thousands of lives, mom. Each one is so sure of their realness, that their sensory experience constituted a unique individual with purpose, meaning, so certain that they were more than a biological puppet, when truth wills out, and everybody sees once the strings are cut."
>"Did you read this in one of your books, user? That sound kinda morbid but at least you're not reading comic books anymore. Are you sure you don't want a hot pocket?"
>"A hot pocket indeed, mom. A hot pocket indeed."

...

>sitting at home watching anime on saturday night
>mom walks into room
>"user, Why don't you ever go out and try to meet a girl? You can't meet a future wife at home"
>tell her there is no point
>she asks why
>"People fuck up Mom. We age. Men... women... It's not supposed to work except to make kids"
>tears start welling up in her eyes
>she come over to try to hug me
>I grab her hands and hold them against my chest
>"If you've got some self loathing to do, that's fine Mom. But it ain't worth loosing your hands over"
>"w-what are you doing user?"
>"I'd just apply a couple pounds of pressure... snap your wrists"
>"please let go of me. y-you are hurting me"
>I let her go
>she runs out of the room with tears streaming down her face
>I light a cigarette and continue watching anime

>not wrecked angle

>at my Grandmothers funeral
>turn to my grieving mother and say "what do you think the average IQ of this room is?"
>"please son, not now, I can't listen to you call me an idiot all day. I just want to mourn the loss of my mother"
>"If the only thing making you grieve is the expectation of divine reward then you are a piece of shit"
>she starts to cry
>"What's to say about life? Huh? You gotta get together, tell yourself stories that violate every law in the universe just to be sad over a dead body? Nah"
>my father becomes angry
>he tries to pick me up but I weigh 230lbs
>instead he drags me out of the church by my cape and tells me not to come back in until I grow up
>It becomes clear that religion rewrote pathways in his brain and dulled his critical thinking.
>*drags cigarette*
>People. They're so goddamn frail they'd rather put a coin in a wishing well than buy dinner.

JUST read this onthe archive

Maaaan.... i miss True Detective shitpostting. Those were the times...

>Remember the days of cartridges, Ray ? People used to blow on them when they didn't work as if it changed anything. Well I'm the fucking Nintendo 64, and I'm all out of blow.

>>It's a dog eat dog world
For all intensive purposes I think you are wrong. In an age where false morals are a diamond dozen, true virtues are a blessing in the skies. We often put our false morality on a petal stool like a bunch of pre-Madonnas, but you all seem to be taking something very valuable for granite. So I ask of you to mustard up all the strength you can because it is a doggy dog world out there. Although there is some merit to what you are saying it seems like you have a huge ship on your shoulder. In your argument you seem to throw everything in but the kids Nsync, and even though you are having a feel day with this I am here to bring you back into reality. I have a sick sense when it comes to these types of things. It is almost spooky, because I cannot turn a blonde eye to these glaring flaws in your rhetoric. I have zero taller ants when it comes to people spouting out hate in the name of moral righteousness. You just need to remember what comes around is all around, and when supply and command fails you will be the first to go. Make my words, when you get down to brass stacks it doesn't take rocket appliances to get two birds stoned at once. It's clear who makes the pants in this relationship, and sometimes you just have to swallow your prize and accept the facts. You might have to come to this conclusion through denial and error but I swear on my mother's mating name that when you put the petal to the medal you will pass with flying carpets like it’s a peach of cake.

When I was a kid, I went to Grand Canyon and saw a man yelling at it. I asked him what he was doing and he said he wanted to hear the echo. I asked him what it was and he explained that it was the sound waves bouncing back to me. I yelled my name into the canyon, Ray. "FFFFRRRRAAAANNNKKK" and then...silence. You know what I learned that day, Ray? You better listen up because I never repeat myself.