"So what's Plan B?"

>"So what's Plan B?"
>"That WAS Plan B!"

>"So what's Plan B?"
>"RUN!!!!!!"

>He's right behind me right?
>no I'm in front.

>...
>Well then, what's plan C?
>We'll see (C)

Dumb posts

>You just don't get it do you?

>"Not bad ...
>...
>... for a human !"

>and your other gun

>what did you just say?
>nono, the other thing
>you're a genius!

>The Police Chief is an angry Black man who's screaming at the Protagonists

>characters from a cold, generic metropolitan city travel to California
>"Welcome to the Wild, Wild west" starts playing

>character plays poker
>wins with a royal flush

>How can you be so sure?
>Because I'm the one who invented it...

What your mother should have taken. But here you are.

>Who said it was a 'he'?

>Wait!
>cloudy person out of focus throws his hand.
>"5 of a kind, guess it's not your lucky day today "

>so where is she?
>I thought she was with you!

Name 11 movies where this happens.

>"Let me slip into something more comfortable.."
>comes out wearing pajamas

>comes out wearing a snuggie

>You're a big guy!
>For you.

>Do you hear that?
>hear what?
>Exactly! It's too quiet

too bad your mother didn't take plan B

>characters travel to Texas
>'Johnny Cash - Ghost Riders in the Sky' starts playing

>smell that?
>smell what?
>BRAAARRRRPP

>character travels to Boston
>I'M A SAILOR PEG

>"D.As crawling up my ass"

>That information is on a need to know basis
>Well I need to know!

plan b is basically plan a but with more guns

name one and a half movies that this happens in

>the rules...
>I just changed the rules!

>wakes up to alarm
>tries to find alarm from under blanket
>turns off alarm
>Sighs

>Rule 1: There are no rules

>Any more bright ideas?
>Just one

>but the rules say-
>I AM THE RULES

>Where's the backup?
>That WAS the backup!

Underrated

>Don't die on me!

>character flops straight flush
>folded player announces he had trips

>We ARE the backup!

>"whats up losers/nerds!"

>character uses a weapon for the first time
>"I'm really starting to get the hang of this thing!"

>hand in your left
>no your other left

>In English, please

kek

>no, this technique will reduce your lifespan!

>so here's the plan
>the characters are shown doing the plan while being narrated

>But the rules say....
>They're more guidelines anyway.

>character appears stage-right, visible injuries
>"you should see the other guy"

Underrated as fuck

Kek everytime

>But I thought you were dead!
>I got better.

>plot revelation unfolds
>"BINGO!"

>I want the best man you've got
>Sure, just one problem
>What?
>She's no man

>How do I know that I can trust you.
>You don't

>no man can kill me
>I'm no man

>"We're not in Kansas anymore..."
>They're not from Kansas

>WHATEVER YOU DO, DO NOT TOUCH ANYTHING FROM THIS TIMELINE
>Protagonist inadvertently changes the future by stepping on a flower

>"you thinking what I'm thinking?"
>grin and nod at eachother

>whatever amount theyre paying you, i'll pay double!
>character still kills target

>No, your other Leppo!

Aim for the bushes

>character explaining something boring
>camera lazily pans over to attractive lady
>"ARE YOU LISTENING?"
>camera snaps back

> How did you know about X?
> I didn't, you just told me.

>I thought you were decent
>you're just like all the rest

>"it's not about the money"
>"it was never about the money"

>2 characters talking about main character in [different language]
>later, main character gloats, "I speak [different language]

>Bitchy, older but still kinda attractive lady looking at herself in the mirror deviously.
> "mirror mirror on the wall [/spoiler] is the hair on the pussy or the ball"

>woman defeats ex-navy seal with the one self defense move the hero taught her

> grew up with 7 brothers

>you've very attractive, but I'm old enough to be your father
>cut to them having sex

>my hips are moving on their own

>where's the backup?
>here, sir
>great, where's the rest of them?

>eating breakfast
>drinking OJ
>sitting at a table before work/school
>talking to family
>looks bright like midday

>you thought it was going to be that easy

>its just the comic relief victim and the MC defeats him in one blow

>character 1: that was easy
>character 2: too easy

>I'm going to go stretch my legs

>Character eats an apple to appear appear intimidating

>MC has been defeated, all is lost
>Suddenly realizes that the object he's been carrying with him the whole film holds the key to reversing the situation.

>i didn't sign up for this

>You should have read the contract.

>shot reveals character is visibly injured
>other character notices
>"You need to go to a hospital?"
>Character refuses
>passes out
>wakes up all patched up

>I will help you, UNDER ONE CONDITION

>que lame exposition about what happened while he was passed out

>Its quite
>...
>too quite

>MC's dying (son,daughter,mother,wife) gives him a trinket
>later on in the film, gets shot and falls to the ground seemingly dead
>villain gloats before getting killed by MC
>reaches into his pocket and pulls out trinket with bullet lodged in it

>Hear that?
>I don't hear anything
>Exactly

>it's a naked gun movie
>character eats an apple to appear intimidating
>it changes between bites to a pear, a banana, a watermelon slice and finally a lemon
>lingering shot of his scrunched up face

>arrive on a new planet
>this is wheat
>who planted it?

>bad guy points gun at good guy
>BANG
>close up of bad guy realising he was shot by a 3rd character

>wakes up in unfamiliar place
>"Where am i?"

every time.

>"i saw you die."

>female character knows karate

>my father didn't want me to be a victim

>>i didn't sign up for this
>character's a soldier
you literally did you faggot

>I didn't get the memo

>GOD DAMMIT [CHARACTER], DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW MUCH THAT STUNT COST THE DEPARTMENT? NOT TO MENTION I HAVE THE MAJOR AND THE DA BREATHING DOWN MY NECK. YOU ARE A LOOSE CANNON AND YOU ARE LUCKY I DON'T FIRE YOU. I DON'T KNOW WHERE YOU'RE FROM, BUT IN THIS DEPARTMENT WE DO THINGS BY THE BOOK GODDAMMIT
>By the way, damn fine job out there.

>"Any last words?"
>MC says corny play on words revealing he has the upper hand in the situation.

>party scene
>this is how we do it starts playing