Why do we no longer discuss this silly goose?

Why do we no longer discuss this silly goose?

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articles.latimes.com/1988-02-14/entertainment/ca-42829_1_steven-seagal/3
youtube.com/watch?v=USUbB-kg6P4
youtube.com/watch?v=269tYaa-Fyg
youtube.com/watch?v=FWZ4HPAdTew
youtube.com/watch?v=2b5bG8Rcpxo
youtube.com/watch?v=J_dnw7uz6rY
youtube.com/watch?v=2dakhzl2SBQ
youtube.com/watch?v=DVs--uHf4sE
youtube.com/watch?v=DDjqV_vNOwY
youtube.com/watch?v=6zZzC2yhhHE
anyforums.com/
twitter.com/SFWRedditVideos

i think he released a new kino fairly recently

someone needs to comb through it for memeworthy snippets a-la birthday snatching

kids today dont' have enough smarts to watch the classics

What a great movie

Seagal contacted his secret network of spies across the USA and had peoples IP's traced who made fun him in Sup Forums

Reminder that Van Damme wanted to kick his ass and Seagal chickened out like a bitch twice

Read an interview with Segal once where he basically said to the interviewer,

>Leave me the fuck alone I hate celebrity bullshit I'm a fucking ninja

He says a lot of stuff in interviews

>"Let me tell you something that might be a bit dangerous. I was raised in Japan. I was schooled in martial arts. I was given the title of master. They take a movie 'The Last Samurai.' They have a 5-foot-2-inch little guy, whether he was straight or gay, I don’t know. I don’t care. He had never been to Japan. He doesn’t speak Japanese. He has never held a sword. They make him the Last Samurai. We got 450,000 phone calls [laughs] from everybody in the world saying, 'That role was perfect for you. How did that happen?' Most of the people I know didn’t like the film and didn’t go see it. It’s just a classic example of Hollywood and the politics."

Bogdanoffs bow to Seagal.

he's like the liar kid at highschool who told everybody he had a bazooka under his bed that he uses to kill rabbits with.

>"These guys were my students. They saw my abilities, both with martial arts and with the language. My CIA godfather told me he'd never heard any American speak Japanese so well. I would say I was a prime candidate to be recruited."

articles.latimes.com/1988-02-14/entertainment/ca-42829_1_steven-seagal/3

Exactly. And now he's best friends with Putin despite being called out many times on his bullshit.

The man really loves to compliment himself. His interviews only consist of "me this, me that" and how he's sorry that he can't be everything. It's funny and fucked up at the same time.

seagal doesn't play those childish games. he only ducked because he knows that in a defensive situation he might seriously injure the other person

Seagal is the most humble man on earth

And he literally spars with Putin.

I mean, it can't all be true... Can it?

Would a man this awesome lie?

youtube.com/watch?v=USUbB-kg6P4
youtube.com/watch?v=269tYaa-Fyg

>limply holds guy's hand while he flips himself around and onto the floor

I don't know anything about this sport but this doesn't seem right

>The man really loves to compliment himself. His interviews only consist of "me this, me that" and how he's sorry that he can't be everything. It's funny and fucked up at the same time.
So you think this quality is fucked up in actors, who are usually narcissistic; but completely fine in a president?

He has them instantly in a position where he could break their arm and wrist

Why did you try to invent a strawman for no reason? Do you normally argue this pathetically? Why do you like getting gang raped by niggers but not faggots?

Obviously the posture quote is referring to airsoft.

the only way this fat idiot is breaking anyone's bones is by sitting on them

>That fuckin' nobody is Steven Seagal. He once was an operative of ours. They call him Baba Yaga.

>The Boogieman?

>Well Steven wasn't exactly the Boogieman. He was the one you sent to kill the fucking Boogieman.

Wouldoperatewith

>ywn take down Mexican cartels with reserve deputy Steven Seagal

So basically he has the same degenerative mental illness as the president?

Go ahead, champion that little bitch van Damme. The only reason Seagal didn't want to fight him is that he doesn't want to be forced to kill again.

Truly inspiring

I never said it's a fine trait in any person to be overly narcissistic. But those people still usually have actual events to back them up in what they say.

Seagal just mumbles out every personal fantasy he can think of as a fact and he's still maintaining a status despite all of this. But the most fucked up part is that Seagal himself believes everything he says.

Obama's not president anymore

sorry user you cant keep yp

It's a good thing, too. Seagal knows what's up:

youtube.com/watch?v=FWZ4HPAdTew

I should try watching some of the newer operator movies that this goofball has made. Seagal KINO has always been great, but it seems like it keeps getting better the older and more delusional he gets.

>Norris, he wouldn't have made it through boot camp

>They called him the Birthday
>The Birthday?
>Well he isn't exactly the Birthday. He's the one you send to snatch the fucking birthday.
>Steven is a man of power. Bushido. Sheer heft. Things you know very little about.
>I once saw him eat 6 cheesesteaks in a bar. With a fucking spoon.
>A
>FUCKING
>SPOON

*to eat the fucking Boogieman.

As time goes on he basically just does less and less in each movie.
In newer ones he hardly does anything more than walk around and mumble, with obvious stunt performers filling in during action sequences for anything more than waving his hands.

Now he has his double do his acting too
youtube.com/watch?v=2b5bG8Rcpxo
Truly an avantgarde kinographer

Steven Seagal was one of the most outstanding warriors this country has ever produced. He was brilliant and outstanding in every way. And he was a good man too. Humanitarian man, man of wit and wicked sense of humor.

He joined the CIA. After that, his ideas, methods, have become unsound...

Now he's crossed to Russia with his Slavic fans, who worship the man like a god, and follow every order however ridiculous.

Because there's a conflict in every human heart between the rational and the irrational, between good and evil.The good does not always triumph. Every man has got a breaking point. You and I have. Steve Seagal has reached his. And very obviously, he has gone insane

I want to watch that one in it's entirety solely because of Steven trying to pull off the operator look.

Seems like he just wants to vanish into the background and get paid for being good at Aikido at this point.

I thinks he's totally beyond the point where he gives a fucks about movies.

laugh

Is it normal for cops in Arizona to wear a multicam uniform?

youtube.com/watch?v=J_dnw7uz6rY

He's too busy searching for Richie to be worth discussing

...

Personally when I'm in a fight I do frontflips every time he touches me so he feels better. It's really what you should always do as a gentleman.

He looks legit in that Jap video though when five guys do try to rush him at once. Probably just playing along with his Russia bros otherwise

Personally when i'm in a fight i teleport behind my opponents

He reminds me of Jason Blaha, only succesful.

Has anyone played Postal 2?

There is a objective where you have to give your vote and Steven Seagal appears as candidate for a Sheriff.

Bit ironic that Seagal IRL years later became a reserve sheriff in Arizona.

Who is more powerful?

Reserve deputy, different thing

What does his bathroom look like? Is it purely functional, or do you think it's ridiculously ornate?

Terminate, with extreme prejudice

The call that saved Richie

...

>According to William Forsythe, Steven Seagal told Forsythe, "You really need to work on your Brooklyn accent." Forsythe, a Brooklyn native, replied, "Trust me, YOU do."

>Why do we no longer discuss this silly goose?
Because he's a Seagal

...

Is he even good at aikido?

Easy. EASY.
youtube.com/watch?v=2dakhzl2SBQ

63 seconds of kinography

youtube.com/watch?v=DVs--uHf4sE

hahaha is that how the movie ends? holy shit

>pick a handsome, non-obese short guy
>or a fat weeb who makes shitty straight-to-DVD action movies and probably lies about his height

EASY
*stops pissing*

>I was raised in Japan
I thought he was raised i Chicago, where he learned the Blues from the legends that lived there?

I didn't realize that S.S. is a partial Asiatic from his father's line.

>I am a Russian Mongol

youtube.com/watch?v=DDjqV_vNOwY

What a looney

LMAO is that danny trejo?

>I'm Russian

what did he mean by this?

he was raised several times in different disciplines
he was a child prodigy because of this

This can't be real.

/leftychan/ beat me to it

You must be new to Seagalkino.

youtube.com/watch?v=6zZzC2yhhHE

This is pure kinography

He's the Grand Wizard of Aikido

It's very rare that you get endings this good

Vlad only hires the best of the best bodyguards

He has a black belt in slapping

This is kino.
Look how he flows.

he has a black belt on everything.

>CIA director: We need a man to infiltrate the Russian government.

>Bogdanoff: Theres only one man for the job

>CIA director: But he's retired

>Bogdanoff: Not anymore

The Call that Saved Punani

It is rumored that Seagal during his CIA days met Putin in Kabul during the Afghan-Soviet war.

During the war Putin was working for the KGB where he tortured capitured Mujahideens and earned a nickname "Shalashaska"