Press F for Paul Warrior

Press F for Paul Warrior
He loves his country so much he didn´t give a single fuck
I mean he knew he would get the antidoping, didn´t he?

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ITS NOT FAIR BROS !!!
he literally dindu nuffin

Coca tea is a hell of a drug

what happened perúbros?

he got caught in november with traces of cocaine for a routine anti-doping exam, FIFA decided today his punishment is going to be 1 year, so he's out of the WC if his defense can't lower it.

They said the substance was from coca leaves in some tea he drank, and later exam of his hair didn't find traces of cocaine, so it at least supports the idea of him not being a regular user.

Peru is literally nothing without guerrero. Why not kick them out and let us in instead?

Coca leaves are regularly used herbal teas in Peru and Bolivia. It's not like he is snorting white powder cocaine like those old white fucks believe in Switzerland. Fuck off FIFA. Let us have 1 good world cup, you've already fucked us with 2022

>us

US didn't qualify, bud

IT ISNT FAIR, BROS! IT ISNT FUCKING FAIR!

>the German satellite of Peru
What the hell they were thinking?

what do you think guys?
is he on drugs or not?

Peru über alles
Rip in piece Paul Krieger

entire peru team framed for drugs and therefore disqualified
italy get into wc instead screen this

el cincuentayseis porcientano

He didn't even do drugs, but a contaminated infusion.

>That shitty jabbing, crossing and foot game
No wonder he escapes reality doing cocaine

S

Imagine if he was an argie player, everyone would be saying he is a cokehead and deserves it but oh no hes peruvian he cant snort a line for his life even tho he acts and looks like a thug. fuck this

RIP LAD

Maradona used to sniff the field, no one bat's an eye.

Peruvian drinks coke tea, everyone loses his shit

I don't think cocaine makes you trip user...
I haven't even really done weed tho.

you truly believe hed just go and ask for three lines, and be the only one at that (the players make groups, like high school, if one does it then another does it too)?

only possibilities:
contaminated tea machine (possible, fucker made a load of coca tea packages, then a load of regular tea without cleaning the tools, at the same time improbable that he'd be the lucky guy using that 1% tea bag unless you can test any tea bag sold in peru and get positive)

addict whore, possible, theres cases where you get contaminated from a kiss, then he fucked up big time with his gf (on top of no longer getting the big $$ if shes a digger), unless the gf is the addict

he has the millenarian incan knowlege of herbs and brews and has an ancient doping protocol that was undetectable until now

he was suspiciously caught on the argentina match, with visit from the head honchos, after going through the trouble of painting the walls green just to ensure the win, might as well put some coke on the shower water, it doesnt help that peru, if they pass the groups, should be meeting argentina once more, only way this loses credibility for eternity is if argentina dodges peru on purpose

sorry argies but you have history of drugging opponents and grondona stuff

no ones gonna read all that crap

drinking coke is also a costume in bolivia and northwest argentina, you could say maradona just had a tea

great post

fuckin damage control
Also why you consider drugging while with the team the only possibility? he could use drugs anytime

Good. Our niggers will have an even easier time raping this non-country AND Perutards will be able to save their "pride" by claiming things would have been different if not for the unfair suspension of that cokehead Santananas de la Vega.

because hed be using enhancers, not coke

if he uses enhancers hed be using them his entire career

if he made his career through enhancers hed have believed the thing was untraceable, if it was untraceable hed have shared with his protegees (just like he would have been shared the secret by the seniors at the team when he just joined)

finally the last person to be in on the thing would be a peruvian, so if he did dope, then the whole argentinian and brazilian squads and many more are as well except they dont get backstabbed

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course he knew lad
they always test the star player of the game/team

>acts like a thug
He's a manchild that doesn't like to appear in camera and sends his mum to speak with the press instead

I thought so

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lol I'm sure there are many organizations DESPERATE for Peru to be without their captain. It can't be that he's just a fucking mestizo idiot.

why the fuck is cocaine and weed bannable in sports? they don't make you play better but quite the opposite

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THINK OF THE CHILDREN

they didnt find cocaine they found whatever-ine that appears from cocaine but is used to mask a doping protocol (eg if it is found they dont find the doping substance but the cocaine substance so you can pretend it was tea leaves)

at least thats what I understood

>cocaine
It can make you play better

NOOOOOOOOOO

no, you feel invincible, but are the same, you have a higher chance of killing/injuring yourself perhaps

ever seen a bolivian lifting stuff?
that´s the power of coca leaf

It could have been some sort of backup plan from Argentina in case they didn't make it that somehow came out a month later

>in an alternative timeline where FIFA wasn't a bunch of retards Peru won Bronze on the 2018 WC in Russia
We won't even get group phase now, bravo.

You had no chance to begin with, m8.

pls

swear u were lucky to even qualify wasnt there somin to do with illegible players?

yes let's not mention that

Tomato and Tortellini is why

if peru got kicked out then chile would have to face new zealand for the spot

Come on now, mate, don't be silly.

im made up for you guys desu tho
and i just looked at the group you should qualify/have a good chance aussies are average at best

>beat Denmark
>tie with France
>beat Iceland
>penulty with Spain
Not saying we are that good, just good enough to make it to the semifinals

I think this is unironically a good thing for us, without guerrero they won't be able to abuse hoofballs when they can't score so they'll be forced to stick to passing the ball around to open the other team up

Well done PERU for qualify in the world cup after 500 years well done....
HOWEVER

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>Paolo could have got away with it by just saying that his gf was a junkie
If I recall that excuse have actually worked all the time, why Paolo, why not.

has*

cocaine is a meme drug

cheezburger?

J U S T
U
S
T

ZARPALE LA LATA

>sends his mum to speak with the press instead
HOLY SHIT IS THIS LEGIT?

its possible, but iirc the press followed her since he wasnt even here. Press is like piranhas, the mom liked the fame for a while too

What are the odds that his real actually lowers his ban?

what is english

Paolo, pls

>pls put my team in instead of peru!
new zealand and chile are the only two countries that would eventually deserve that spot

Yeah, because that worked so well against Nueva Peelandia.

Fuck off CHI
>losing to TripAdvisor and Trivago

SALTO LA FICHA EN EL BARRIO

Didn't they have the obligation of reporting everything they consume? I remember reading if you take some aspirin pills, you have to report it.
Even if what you say it's true (thing that I doubt it), it was his obligation to say it.

any pills/drugs they take that they feel could cause trouble during the test, they dont literally keep a log of everything that happens. Just imagine how annoying that would be:

>08.00am snorted 10g of coke, 99% pure, 1% salt
>08.30am drank 178.52ml of water, from the faucet, sent a sample to the lab for testing of actual components
>09.00am paloma caca in my mouth, sample sent but I believe it was mostly ants and trash
>09.30am hope no one notices I took some PEDs
>10.00am some fucker splashed some liquid on my face, hope it was not contaminated, broke his nose
>10.30am the locker room had a mist that smelled of body powder, I feel invincible
>11.00am messi is such a nice guy, gave me some energy candy, although I couldnt see where he took it from, will need an hep c test later
>11.30am took my 312134688751246348th breath, sample sent to check for contaminants.
>12.00pm guerreiro caca, toilet paper could be contaminated, sample sent
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>04.00am mosquito buzz woke me up, smashed the fucker, sample sent because it could be contaminated (hell, hotel air could be compromised while you sleep, what can you do about it?)

cant bother to make the meme longer but /x/-wise if I wanted to fuck you up I could, although shooting you is easier probably

>snorted 10g of cocaine
You defo sound like you did
P-paolo?

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ves, dice que en el mismo hotel lo drogaron
youtube.com/watch?v=ZwTSGpmb-eg

any genuine peruvians in here what are ur oppinions on him/this?

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I unironically think he didn't do coke, still a dumb careless cunt

You subhuman baboon. You literal nigger.

How dare you speak, you swarthy jungle monkey. How dare you open your big lipped, rim encrusted, menthol cigarette smelling mouth

You are human trash, Diego Tyrone LeShawn de Maradona. Universally despised, derided and mocked. Your nationality and skin tone offers no hope to the world that South America can ever prosper. Crawl back in to the Brazilian jungle you came out of, you literal orangutan.

I hope you decide to sail your grandfathers skip to the Falklands and rape some sheep, as is in the negroes nature. It would still be the whitest pussy you ever had. Give Nigel and Robert a chance for some target practice, your sole use to the world. Argentinians obsession with a few windswept islands in the Atlantic is hilarious but sad. Coincidentally its the only worthwhile contribution Argentina has made to the medical field. The MUH LAS MALVINAS sentiment in the average negro Argentinian is both an early warning sign of autism in children, and early on set Alzheimer's in adults.

Take your black hairy fingers off your keyboard, and never talk about the human species again, you mockery of our supposed shared ancestor.. No amount of olive oil and wheat flour slabbed on your face every morning will make you white. It's about as delusional of an idea as your daydreams of European heritage.

You nigger.

You make Bolivia look like a beacon of civilisation.

You are the Baltimore of South America.

Go fertilise the pampas with you and your families corpses, its the best you can hope for in life. For the first time in your life, nigger, you have a job making food for beings vastly superior to yourself. Uruguayan cattle. Coincidentally, it would be the first time an Argentinian "man" provided for a family.

Die, Diego. No one would miss you. Except for Australian Aboriginals, who now would have no one to make them look good.

*kneels*

Aye perubros where yall niggas from i miss mi peru burgerland is shit

Yea i think its the ol lickaroo of coca tea and he was unprofessional so im quite rustled at the moment pls no bully rn