Visit germany

>visit germany
>use airbnb
>host family has toilet like in pic
>shit in it
>get out of bathroom
>"did you remember your scheisse inspect?"
>no?
>GET OUT OF MEIN HAUS!!

germans....

>visit germany
>get worshipped for being brown

Aww but look at this Klo. It's smiling.

Whta does this mean???

>visit america
>use airbnb
>can't find a toilet
>ask the host family where it is
>"A toilet? What, a wallmart aisle is not good enough for you, you fucking commie?"
>no?
>GET OUT OF MAH HOUSE!!
americans..

As an Australian, this infuriates me. The point of a toilet bowl is to have the opitimal dynamics to flush everything away with 2 fifths of fuck all of a cistern's full of water

Germans shit in those kind of toilets and afterward inspect and reseach their poop for hours

The consistency of your poop tells you alot about your health and diet.
A healthy pooper is a happy human.

The best toilet.

I shit twice a week

It's also an added benefit that the water doesn't come splashing into your asshile every time you take a shit.

Hahaha it makes sense. Germans have to inspect their poo for hours every day for fear some nazi hunting jew assassins might be hiding in it

Come on you guys, my toilet isn't like that.

Oh does anybody talk about poo-poo?
Marisha's poo-poo is so easy, mister human can wipe-wipe it and make Marisha even more easy, je?

Doesnt make sense, because that implies that the jewwas inside my body, where he had all possibilities to harm my body from the inside

hey, I had one of those!

It was disgusting.

what drug are you on?
Is that a language?

>visit britain
>use airbnb
>can't decide whether to use hot or cold flush

Mister Japanese human, take it easy, je?
Don't use such lewd language, je?

ja

my german impression:
ahem,


9! 9! 9!

>he needs hours to inspect his poo

Never talk to me or my efficiency ever again

rice poo is best poo

>Come on you guys, my toilet isn't like that.
I've literally never seen a toilet in Germany not like that. Why do you want the feces to be sitting in open air? The whole point of water in the bowl prior to flushing is for the smell.

That, and the turd leaves a giant skid mark as the water shoves it across the platform.

>No shit inspection
He likes cancer, lol.

This toilet was carefully engineered for reverse straddling.

Where you only on public toilets?

my toilet isn't like that either.

Literally only public toilets, some Hotel toilets and old people have these.

you need a photo of a toilet with timestamp you autist?

i would shit facing the wall, no german will analize my shit!

> Germany visits you
> Fucking autists blocking the way and screwing up the traffic and doing ebin smoking weed and speaking German to everyone

you forgot the most important part

A literal shit thread full of shitposts

Haha

>Germany visits you
>Two weeks later Soviet Union visits you as well

...

I've seen this in Lithuania, I don't know the purpose of the shit shelf.

>mfw a poker hand with two 9's is called German virgin

Inspect your poop.
Simple as.

what is it with german and their enthusiasm about poop?

It reminds them of what they have become.

they take shit seriously

why are euro water levels so low?

These toilets are literally for people who enjoy the smell of shit.

I
do
not
understand
it

I was going to shitpost about brazilian public bathrooms. This is the lest disturbing picture i found on google...

kek

yes

Nice

here you little meme-shit

How do you even do a scheisse inspect, though.

try dutch toilets

I really don't know what's worse. Having a german poop inspection shelf or used toilet paper in open air trash cans in Latin America.

this could be any toilet

cool proxy, pal

literally never seen a toilet like this except for once on an ossie camping place

what?

Where did you get that classified information?!

>user says I should do timestamp pic of my toilet
>do it
>lol proxy

why would I even proxyfag for a picture of a toilet?

it's just a normal toilet

just having a laff dude. btw those toilets are also a thing in here, mostly in old people houses as well. I wonder why it used to be popular in general and why they came to Poland, maybe eastern Germany influence? are those more popular in eastern Germany, that would fit my theory?

Why the fuck is there so much water?

>I wonder why it used to be popular in general and why they came to Poland

reparations for that accident


Memes aside these things are common in all kinds of public restrooms in east Germany and a bit in North west.
Don't see them that often tho.
I really don't know or care what they are good for and I try to avoid them.

I dont understand the PT cans, old people don't know that TP dissolves in water and there are some that have shitty plumping.

Good, but having a carpet in front of the toilet is disgusting.

What if I'm barefoot? The floor is cold af

I'm not sure if you are referring to the massive bicycle theft or the fact that you have to wear a helmet.

I miss poop shelf toilets. 100% butt splash proof.

I understand, try wood is way better and feels great.

>not having pooping stools


just place a piece of tp over the water.

The butt splash is like a built in bidet

>just place a piece of tp over the water.
Not 100$% splash proof. Also it's a waste of TP. Poop shelf toilets for life.

those old toilets were mainly used to check for illnesses.
basically check if your poop is okay or you really need to go to a doctor.
they fell out of trend, but most older buildings still have them, because "lol why renovate if it still works"

not gonna lie I like to observe my shit every so often but what is the average person really going to tell by looking at their shit. Did people have special scalpels in their bathroom and w would they cut their turds in half?

we call it "german toilet"

you can tell a lot about your diet and intestines health alone on colour and consistency, you actually don't need a doctor for that.

Pro tip: germans use also smell and taste to investigate their poop

wtf germany

go learn swedish you smurf

In a tradishional German toilet, the hole into which shit disappears after we flush is right at the front, so that shit is first laid out for us to *sniff* and inspect for traces of illnesh. In the typical Frensh toilet, on the contrary, the hole is at the back, i.e. shit is shupposed to disappear as quickly as possible. *sniff* Finally, the American (Anglo-Shaxon) toilet preshents a syntheshish, a mediation between these opposites: the toilet bashin is full of water, so that the shit floats in it, visible, but not to be inshpected. *sniff*

It is clear that none of these vershions can be accounted for in purely utilitarian terms: each involves a certain ideological perception of how the shubject should relate to excrement. Hegel was among the first to see in the geographical triad of Germany, France and England an expreshion of three different existential attitudes: reflective thoroughness (German), revolutionary hastiness (French), utilitarian pragmatishm (English). *sniff* In political terms, this triad can be read as German conservatism, French revolutionary radicalism and English liberalism. In terms of the predominance of one shphere of soshial life, it is German metaphyshics and poetry vershus French politics and English economics. *sniff*

The point about toilets is that they enable us not only to discern this triad in the most intimate domain, but also to identify its underlying mechanism in the three different attitudes towards ekshcremental ekshess: an ambiguous contemplative fashination; a wish to get rid of it as fasht as possible; a pragmatic decishion to treat it as ordinary and dishpose of it in an appropriate way. *sniff*

...