/heem/: Splob bless edition

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Who is your 2017 fighter of the year? Mine is Rose Namajunas.

Now this is a thread I can get behind, nice work Chileno!

Gaby smash.

this is the thread

ALRIGHT ENOUG PH I FUCKING WAITIE D TIN 500pisr LIKE YPU FGGTS ASKED NOW GET THE FUCK I; MU THREAD BEFORE I LOSE MH SJIT

What's this guy's name again?

That tripfag is spamming Modafferi on the other thread, he's all but assuring our success due to sheer cringe.

Brendleberry schnaps

Why do you guys idolize Shaub? He doesn't even know you exist.

just skip to the money team spam

Schaub loves his tfatk army, fool!

Trust me on this my guy the jab will land in the rematch

How do I make my own Splob? Do I need to cut back on fiber?

why is this thread so important to you

this question also applies to all the other thread warriors

if you convince me I'll join

Why is black star talking to himself in spammer thread?

I didnt realize were thread warring so early in the week

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c*lendar is kill, the division is wide open. Who is your favorite unranked welterweight?

Max Holloway

Cyborg is such a roidmonster. Disgusting what she's allowed to do.

michael venom page

what happened to calendar OPs? these OPs have been shit the past week

Black star is Thaddeus

Do you think this guy has any chance against that dude Cris Cyborg at 145 pounds?

what should tecia torres' game plan be for jessica andrade?

She should go for the double leg and bite her clit

What's your favorite anime?

Who are the top prospects to watch in MMA at the minute?
What other promotions are worth watching other than UFC?

did he get banned?

just watch fights
rizin and smellator

hook n' shoot, yamma pit fighting

what if tecia knocks him out

youtube.com/watch?v=-7Ov-yatA6k

i feel like i'd really get along with Andrade. She seems like a real bro. We already know she's a fight fan and she trains plus she has a decent wife and a kid so she has morals

mackenzie dern is going to get her face caved in, she's way too short and heavy

Andrade would have to be deleted worse than Diego Sanchez to get put away by the tiny decision tornado

>other promotions
Bellator
PFL
Rizin
One
ROAD
Titan
M1 Global
ACB
Legacy

>being heavy is bad
>being 5'3 in strawweight is bad

she will struggle to make flyweight she's getting older, fatter, and fighting under USADA lol

>PFL

>she will struggle to make flyweight
she made flyweight easy as fuck last fight now that she is solely focused on mma and left jiu jitsu behind and got a proper dietitian
>she's getting older
24 years old lmao
>fatter
beta males will never know what thicc is
>USADA
lmao if you think Thickenzie is on PEDs you need to just shut the fuck up forever

It's good they're giving Joanna an automatic rematch. Rose is the only one who has proven she can beat Joanna. I haven't noticed /heem/ being spammed with Joanna pics by Polish flags lol.

the weight cutting guidelines are different in the ufc lol as are the rehydrating rules, she is going to get smashed she is an f level striker

>she is an f level strik....

Has there ever been a more hype KO?

Anyone have the webm of Schaub fingering his co-host?

>mfw people think stipe is going to lose

>heavyweights just slanging their punches and everythings a knockout because theyre xbox huge
nothanks. Ngannou is the only heavyweight that mattress

She made strawweight again, it might not last but flyweight should be a breeze

God damn JDS is a shell of the man in that webm now. After the two cain losses and getting USADA'd, his career sure took a nose dive

Shlaub is such a flabby fat sack of shit. There's no way he's truly on keto.

...

Ever since I started listening to Schaub, I've started to act more like him, from his mannerisms to his genius ability to analyze situations, and let me tell you something amazing. Chickslove me now, there's somehing about telling them that you'll "gadoosh their tight pussy for sure 100%" that just drives them wild. I've also recently made thousands of dollars through business deals and investments that I've been able to negotiate flawlessly thanks to Schaub teaching me his knowledge. I owe all my success to Brendan Schaub

Schaub bless brothers

What if Luke had pulled guard instead of jumping back up with his fucking chin in the air? Do you think he would've been able to recover?

Heavyweight is so bad that he'll still remain a top ranked guy after he's done with his ban and fully USADA'd

It's not the OP itself that matters, but to live fully and trutfully through the OP - nobody can deny that THAT matters. It is the greatest rush. To be one with the universe. The director, lead actor, and producer of this play we call “Heem”. To be the OP is to replicate truth and that is the highest virtue. Of course the Op doesn't matter! Only a fool would dispute that! It is only BEING the OP that matters.

What if Branch beats Yoel?

based spammer

>What if Luke had pulled guard instead of jumping back up with his fucking chin in the air?
This is what Anderson did and he was able to recover. It was bad enough that he got caught with the first punch but him getting finished was 100% his fault cause of his pride.

>This card marked the UFC's debut on the Fox Network. Zuffa CEO Lorenzo Fertitta confirmed that the debut show would be a one-hour special with only the main event airing live on television, but a full preliminary card taking place beforehand.

>The UFC on Fox main event broadcast marked the most-watched live hour ever for MMA in the United States and averaged 5.7 million viewers. The ratings peaked in the United States at 8.8 million viewers for the main event.
BTFO

BASED NATTY GOAT

...

literally why does he even do it? does he think the janny has to spend hours cleaning his mess up rather than push a couple buttons?

what a fucking weirdo

HW truly is the worst division.

mental illness, just report and ignore

...

Well. That'd be terrible for Yoel and fucking great for Branch. Really overly risky for Yoel considering he's #1 and Branch is #10. If Branch wins it'd be pretty pointless too since he just lost to Rockhold. Then again Yoel has a recent loss to Whittaker but if Rockhold beats Whittaker, I'd love to see Yoel fight him for the belt.

b-b-but andy landed that 1 knee

honestly though I thought that fight was a draw

Is Jorgy Messydoll a good fighter?

beg

>hurr lets give rockhold another title shot
Terrible idea, he will get crushed. Should just keep giving him gatekeepers until he either loses or learns to strike worth a damn

Heem threads are the only ones I visit on this board. Does this guy spam on other generals too or is it exclusive to heem?

Weidman gets next titleshot if Rockhold wins and Yoel loses
>Rockhold sucks xD

It's been at it for over a year now. We are past the point of, "Okay it's time to stop now"

just use these filters along with country filters and you will never see spam ever again

>Le lost 3 in a row and barely beat Gastelum man
>next in line

Rockhold dominated everybody after his Vitor loss (which btw, he would obviously win if they rematched). His loss to Bisping is probably top 5 biggest flukes of all time. Besides, nobody else at MW deserves a title shot right now. Yoel & Jacare just lost to Robert, Chris & Kelvin haven't done enough to deserve it yet, Brunson has a recent loss to Robert... who's do you propose should get it instead of Luke?

>my fighter lost
>F-FLUKE!

Even if the round ended, Bisping was winning

>Holly Holm didn't just get a titleshot
You're saying they're gonna give it to Jacare? LOL

Biggest fluke in UFC history

>so scared of being filtered he makes his posts 1 line long
they're hardly even spam or obtrusive any more bro. thanks

Eh, believe me I'm not crazy about it either but if Luke wins, rematch w/ Chris fits the narrative too well for UFC to pass it up.

>Even if the round ended, Bisping was winning
Oh yeah, I forgot, it was scheduled as a special one round fight, not a 5 rounder.

Mfw filters come through to save the day, thanks guys!

>missing the point

Luke couldn't get passed the first round because he was getting schooled in the first one. There was no fluke. Explain how it was a fluke

>the schaub meme is still going
my god. have you guys realized it will be 4yrs in like 3 months for this meme?

and it only really took off because that britfag kept replying to my bait schaubposting. truly he was the real mvp

That's my fave part lol he's so desperate he'll abandon his usual format so at least even one post seeps through and even then it doesn't count as spam.

was this a fluke?

as if one of you assholes reported my post about american mma fans loving cherry stuff

actual real mental illness bud

When is that UK card Bisp'n is supposed to get heem'd on?

Very important poll coming through guys

strawpoll.me/14803731
strawpoll.me/14803731
strawpoll.me/14803731

surely hendo won that second fight my man

>missing the point
No i wasn't, you don't seem to know what your point is. You said if the round ended, bisping was winning anyway. I responded with well, there would've still been 4 rounds to go. Now you're saying hurrr but he didn't make it past the first round. Get your shit together user.

And no, I'm not explaining how it was a fluke because you know how it was a fluke and it's been talked over and over again ad nauseam

He's not going to retire, he needs to keep fighting till he can pay off that $400k he owes.

When is that card?

>can't explain why it was a fluke

Bisping has enough cash to pay him off. He's already said London will be his last fight.
Not for a while.

H8ers triggered

>Bisping has enough cash to pay him off
No he doesn't. That's why he jumped on the chance to fight Gastelum when he didn't need to.
> He's already said London will be his last fight.
He also said he'd fight Romero but that looks like it's never going to happen.

Holy shit you're retarded if you actually believe that list

Dude i'm about to heem you if you don't watch out, I swear to god