New Jumanji movie gets title and plot details

>Dwayne Johnson brought something big to close out Sony's CinemaCon panel Monday night: the first look at Jumanji: Welcome to the Jungle.

Here's a breakdown of the footage to the newly retitled film:

>The footage begins with four high schoolers in detention. Their teacher orders them to clean out the basement of the school, and they find an old video game console, which features the game Jumanji. You pick a character, and as the teens learn you are that person in the game ... which transports you to a jungle.

>One rather nerdy boy is surprised (and rather pleased) to see he's got the muscles of The Rock. The popular girl in school is horrified to learn she's got the body of Jack Black.

>Earlier during the panel, Johnson spoke of meeting Robin Williams, who starred in the original 1995 hit, backstage at CinemaCon years ago, and said the new film would be a "big" and "global" homage to the first Jumanji.

>Jumanji is from director Jake Kasdan and opens Dec. 22.

This is a disgrace to the original but who cares, look at that tummy

>Jumanji is a video game

GET FUCKED. Why not just create an original title if you're just gonna shit over the main concept of the original.

muh dick

if it follows convention, are we going to see a romance between jack black and the rock?

Get ready for retro jokes

Honestly how do you fuck this up by making it a video game

This casting has made me cautiously optimistic about this movie since I love everyone involved.
It isn't like the original was some big masterpiece.

does that mean Karen Gillan is actually a teenage boy?

what fucking convention might you be referring to, you cave dwelling pond scum?

>oh shit, I'm a girl! a hot one!
>and I'm a guy! and a fat one!
>woah guys, check out my muscles!
>I'm still black, fuck...

>It isn't like the original was some big masterpiece.

It wasn't shit either, at the end of the day it's a really well made family movie that balanced humor and drama better than most of the shlock these days with great performances all around.

>my face when they pulled a Peter Pan with Van Pelt

this is why you shouldn't pierce your navel

navel piercings are cute I'd be more upset about a tattoo fucking Larkin Love

meh I woud so hard

>videogame

DROPPED
R
O
P
P
E
D

>Refers to "shlock" as if it's a bad thing
>Defends the original Jumanji
Literally contradicting yourself. You're right that it wasn't a bad movie, but it's the epitome of shlock

>>Refers to "shlock" as if it's a bad thing

Look it up sometime, you might learn something

>but it's the epitome of shlock

No one will ever agree with you on this.

>Doesn't know what a connotation is
>Tries to sound smart
When you refer to a movie as shlock, you're refering to something which you know is a silly film, but it's enjoying anyway. Such as Jumanji

the neo-Disney Beauty and the Beast convention, I assume

>When you refer to a movie as shlock, you're refering to something which you know is a silly film, but it's enjoying anyway.

For you.

>it's another shitty dwayne johnson family movie
please not again

Are they doing a D&D movie better than D&D movies?

>they get sucked INTO THE VIDEO GAME
>nerdy guy gets muscles
>pretty girl gets man tits
>Jumanji: WELCOME THE THE JUNGLE
Jesus.

>mind of little girl
>body of Jack Black
If only it had been the other way around she would have been perfection

WELCOME TO THE JUNGLE

WE GOT FUN AND GAMES

pond scum doesn't dwell in caves, dude

>Jack Black's character is a girl

Hmmmmmmm

I'm a simple man; I see Dwayne Johnson cast in a film, so I forget that film exists.

Tl;Dr, OP.

Synthwave soundtrack or gtfo

>jumanji
>video game

He is insufferable

So it's TRON

I want all people involved with this movie to die of asscancer.

>creepypasta b& gaming pastas years ago
Hollyweed literally read fanfic creepypasta as inspiration

Fuck you faggot, the original is the perfect children's film.

>produced by Columbia (Sony) Pictures
>written by Scott (((Rosenberg)))

fuckin WEW lad

This really makes me sad. Jumanji was one of my favorite films as a kid and this is looking like absolute shit so far. i fucking hate (((Hollywood))).

>yfw the popular girl in Jack Black's body starts masturbating to Karen Gillan

I'm seeing triple!
Nine Karens!

JUMANJI: WELCOME TO THE JUNGLE

WHY?

I WANT KAREN GILLAN TO SUCK MY COCK

>implying I give a shit
i just came here to laugh.

I cant wait for the ROCK to show his masterful acting techniques.
From grunts to "get to the choppa" he has it all,true artisan of his craft that will be measured by millions of dollars if not more.

Absolute quads of truth

Makes me hope this shit is going to flop hard.

>Jumanji
>video game
ffs
Just the other day I found my old Jumanji book on tape read by Williams.
Fuck this movie. Fuck the Rock's kissing studio ass.

I can't tell if he's hot or not

>Sony pictures presents a rehash of a movie that no fan of the original would want to see
>starring all your favorite B-list actors that you've most definitely heard of

Going to be a hard pass on this one

man i'm so disappointed this show got cancelled.

america just isn't ready for an alpha male asian man domineering over his slutty ginger subordinate.

>John Cho's character in "Selfie"
>Alpha

r/AsianMasculinity, please go.

it was a joke but i still get disappointed thinking of how good the show could have been. his character was the autistic kind of funny