How do you kill someone quickly and efficiently?

How do you kill someone quickly and efficiently?

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nuke them from orbit.

Plasma Arch Incinerator

You suck their cock

drown them, basically no evidence

Set them up. I’m the real world you have to provoke someone to attack you and get them arrested for attempted murder. You can’t just go around killing people you don’t like unless you know you can get away with it.

well, how about that you stopped copying my thread for once, you also have that thing which has a name BRAIN, ffs OP

Suck their dick

CO poisoning?
Icicle lobotomy?
Needle full of air injected into their cock or cunt (no MEs look there)

Wut?

There are so, so many ways, if you think about it people are honestly quite fragile. If you're not worried about making noise or a mess, the quickest and most efficient of course is always going to be a gun, for compact and concealable a handgun is probably the most preferable. Most vidya game nerds always go for headshots but really if you talk to anyone vaguely military related they will tell you always go for center of mass, it's basically a guaranteed kill, if you miss it's still very likely to hit a vital organ, and it's simply a bigger target. If it's a small enough caliber though head is going to be your only option, like a little .22 you actually really have to go for headshot. I recommend a compact .38 or 9mm, it has a bit more punch and will really put someone down, whereas anything smaller has very little stopping power and they might continue to struggle with you for a while

Pray for them that's the best way you can heal them

nvm, carry on, fuck you.

Fuck you, fren

call the cops

get AIDS then pos their butthole

So how do I get one? Baring in mind that I live in a gun with gun restrictions.

I know I can use the dark web but how do I get on there, how do I pay, how is it shipped?

What about homemade? Any tutorials?

>I live in a gun

Meant to say country

Mozambique Protocol

Would be useful if I knew how to get a gun kek

youtube.com/watch?v=5RtkFnkl0Ic

Honestly if you're not able to buy a gun legally, don't have any connections to the black market and don't know how to use the deep web, a knife really is probably superior to a homemade gun. Even a homemade knife. Look up fairbarn-sykes fighting knife and how to use one. What you want is to hit one of about a dozen critical points on the body to do what you want with it

Jugular/carotid (low on the meaty side of the neck, angled down towards the chest), through the ribcage to the heart, these are the fastest bleed out and kill targets. You can also go for ankles to disable someone and then have time to do whatever you want
Kidney (low on the back, right above the hipbones) is also good for putting someone into shock and bleeding out slowly

You can cut someone's throat but this is less efficient than a neck carotid/jugular shot, but make sure you give them the full red smile-cut all the way from ear to ear, otherwise they really could survive longer than you want

Also any chest shot that you twist the blade is going to give a high rate of fatality, even though it takes longer than other methods, so this is for the truly torturous and sadistic. A stab in the chest and twist the blade is very hard to stitch up in an emergency room, and they are likely to bleed out

For more pressure points and where to hit look at a vein/artery diagram or research self defense methods. A stab in the thigh for example can be lethal if you hit an artery but you really have to get lucky or know what you're doing

Fill a spray mister with cyanide.... follow mafucja...spray dat mufucka in face. Pic unrelated.

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Thanks, op.

Here in Georgia they practically give out
.22LR as prizes in kids cereal boxes.

Wish I lived in Georgia.

I'd like some guidance to get a gun online, or a home made tutorial.

Hire a pro

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Thank you

Murder isn't easy to get away with.

Assuming you want to kill said person, they must have wronged you in some way so you will easily be a suspect as you have a motive to commit murder.

Say you set up explosives at their house from stuff you bought at the deep web. All the police would do is obtain your banking history, web history, whereabouts and ask witnesses and calibrate stories with others around the area. The chances of you pulling all this off are slim, you would fuck up leave some evidence somewhere and go away for a long time.

So.. maybe reevaluate the situation? This person has wronged you right? How does killing them make you any better than them? They have succeeded in hurting you to the point you snooped down to their level. Be happy instead, bullies don't like that it drives them mad.

Go eat shit. Sometimes people need revenge.
McFuckingKillYourself.

They don't really care if I react or not, they'll just do the damage, laugh and carry on knowing they've fucked me over.

It's either this or let them drive me insane. Plus I have a mentally ill mother to look after and I don't want to fail college as I'm final year.

They'll drive me nuts if this carries on. And it isn't physical (Thank christ) but they are planning on jumping me one day. And you think I deserve this? Nope. I just thought that they were pricks and weren't mates, all they did is go out of their way to piss me off and when I stand up for myself, it's more relentless. This last fortnight, I have ignored them and they still do it. It's me or them, so I might aswell help myself.

Assuming you're not a troll, please elaborate more in a better manner.

Have you ever heard of the saying "an eye for an eye makes the whole world go blind"?

It's a human instinct to want to retain and regain that ego and dominance a basic human trait. But if we all did that, all we would have is war and pain a shitty world where everyone is out to hurt each other because they offended or hurt them.

Don't forget, people process information differently and misintrep things so you have lot of people offending people unintentionally and thus an endless revenge cycle continues.

Revenge is easy, forgiveness isn't.

But why do you care? That's the problem here.

You shouldn't give a shit what people think it's really about what you want just avoid contact if any abuse continues just report to police for harassment and sorted keep all texts and phone calls.

Can I just say that even in the US, even in the country with one of the better criminal justice systems at catching and charging criminals in the world, fewer than 10% of index 1 crimes are solved. Index 1 means aggravated assault, rape, murder, and we solve fewer than 10% of the cases that are reported

I really strongly disagree with your assertion that murder isn't easy to get away with. Assuming criminals are not the smartest segment of society, to get caught you need to be in the dumbest 10% of criminals. That's pretty dumb
Also a factor is whether or not you know the person, so it is worse to take revenge killing on someone you know rather than target a random stranger. However I still think that you are very, very likely to not be caught

I get that, but I'm not intentionally gonna go out of my way, I'm just gonna do it if they decide to jump me. In all honesty, with my current situation I don't have anything to lose.

No good friends, family will just look after my mom and I'll probably fail in college. And why let some fucking idiots ruin my life and drive me insane. I'm not a troll, and this comes off as edgy but I'm not wrong and there's no other way to put it. No one listens to me.

If you ever bought a lego set, you'd always get a few spare bricks and I'm one of them. No one cares until they need me.

This is what you deserve for being so fucking retarded if you use that horseshit phrase.

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Bump

With kindness... obviously.

With kindness

Duhhh, should have thought of that myself. kek

quickly and efficiently, 4 inch knife in the back of the neck pointing towards their skull going in at a 35-75 degree angle
complete lights out

now that's quickly and efficiently but not so much something you can perform and get away with unless you're in a brazilian favela or similar

It's getting darker more earlier, and I'm pretty sure I could run and get rid of the evidence and hide the rest.

Get someone else to order you pure caffeine. Sneak it into their beverage.

Nah, these idiots drink monster all day, so they're probably immune

35-75 degree angle? That's a lot of variation in angle user what are you talking about
Is it 35 or 75

35 to 75, anywhere in between and you're pressing the switch for their life.

it can depend on knife size, for a smaller knife you would want to be closer to the 35 degree and with a longer then being closer to 75 will get the job done.

as for knife size, im going off their hypothetical neck size against the knife.

How long should I keep it in? And should I move it around? Someone said previously that if they survive, they'll bleed out as it'll be hard to stitch up.

at the back of the neck with the right angle done, there isn't any surviving, which is why im saying it's efficient.
it is considered one of the most humane ways to kill someone because of how effective it is, if done fast there's no pain for the victim and they won't even have time to let out as gasp before dying. all twisting will do is give the impression that you're committed to the kill which isn't good in a court case.

Hammer straight to the fucking skull
If you're lucky they'll die in that first hit
If you're a bit less lucky you'll just knock em' out and make em' retarded

Pretty sure stabbing someone in the back won't be a winnable case in court. Might as well go all in.

if you're claiming that you couldn't control yourself for some insanity plea then a simple stab to the back of the neck favors you more than a stab and twists.
twisting isn't going all in, all it would do is make it bleed more which makes life harder for you. whereas a simple knife in and knife out will take a while to bleed yet do the exact same with the same survival rate of 0.

anything that doesn't kill on the first hit isn't very quick or efficient

Yeah, I guess. And in all honesty, it's a hit or miss with a blunt object. You have to hope you hit a certain spot with a certain amount of force.

But I really just want a gun, it's quick and clean but I can't get one. But it any of you frens could tell me how to buy one online or make one, it'd be much appreciated.

I'm not insane, but some dickheads are worth killing, and I'm not going out of my way to do so. I'm Just waiting for them to jump me on one of the days I'm walking home from campus or something.

have you considered reporting it or assuming you're an american that you can carry a gun?

if you're getting jumped then pull out a homemade gun is going to put you behind bars. besides, you'd fuck your entire life up if you kill them or not.

as for getting guns, every city in every country has them as well as people that can get them. expect to pay up to thousands more than the seller paid though, the people giving you the gun will be members of a gang that are putting themselves on the line for your money

Catch a couple black widows. Look under large rocks or pieces of lumber. Bottle them up, shake them up real good to get them pissed off and throw them onto the person while they sleep. Thank me later.

Holy shit OP, seems you are some 15year old that is getting bullied in school. Grow some balls, beat one of the fuckers to a pulp, poison their dog, go psycho on them. Terrorise them. Right now you're just a victim that's desperate enough to do real stupid shit that will fuck your life up.

Like I said, I, have nothing to lose. People will just take care for my mother, no friends, no one cares for me, only liked when people need something, failing college so I'll have no good future. I'm pretty sure these people need shooting. And I'll just do the pussy thing and shoot myself afterwards, as shooting 5 people will definitely be a life behind bars or the death penalty.

>start to hang out with them more often
>go on dates
>suck their dick passionately
>fall deeply in love with each other
>get married
>buy a nice house in the suburbs
>adopt a boy
>after the kid is 10 announce that the kid is trans
>he refuses
>call the police on him for being transphobic
>take the kid away
>he goes to jail
>make him pay for the transition and child support from jail
>send him pictures of your daughter() getting gangbanged by black guys every day and loving it
>send him honeymoon photos of you and your new boyfriend
>he hangs himself in jail after realizing he has aids from getting buttraped so much
it's foolproof op

>imagine believing this was true
His lungs were completely filled with water, and he had bruise marks in the shape of hand, plus a sign of a struggle
>ruled a suicide

I'm 19, other than that you're pretty much accurate

soild

I thought of the bruises as well

or you can turn your life around and do something different. work on construction sites, on a farm, join the army or navy, become a train operator or something.
get some active hobbies and make some friends that way.

killing yourself and ruining your life is retarded. take it from someone that has tried it twice, failed school and had no friends for 6 years.

you dont. seek help

if you want to suffer then deprive yourself, eat healthy and exercise

Did you ever turn it around?

Because I don't see how I can.

Kiss them on the lips

Well then. Consider my words.

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That nigga Ice man was a cold motherfucka

I'll bare it in mind, user.

Slam shotgun. 20 bucks of materials from homedepot

yes im a farm worker that makes more money than any of my old classmates make. i can afford my own house while they're suffering from debt from going to university.
my body is much healthier, more built and more toned than all my classmates including the bullies that went gym.

i have enough friends to be happy with. hobbies that i love. a lot of women that openly fantasizes about and flirts with me.

my life is nothing like it use to be at all. id have missed out on all of this if i had done it properly. ive been seconds away from dying and can say with a smile on my face that my life got better because i put the effort in.

a potato cannon but instead of a potato use a lacrosse ball
aim at the poor soul's neck

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ctrl alt del, stop process

Here's the answer that you need to read. Your goal isn't to get away with murder. Your goal is to make sure nobody can EVER prove a murder has happened. If there is dead body, no witnesses, no trace of blood anywhere connected to the victim, no weapon, and no sign of communication between you and the victim, then there is no murder investigation. You want the person to remain a missing person until the end of time. There are several ways to manage this. The best of which would be to find some hogs. In SC where I live, they're everywhere if you know where to look. You burn their shoes, crush their skull, pull all their teeth and get rid of them, and feed everything else to the hogs.

I hope things get better, and I hope I live a life like you when I finish. I just want to be happy but I can't. Honestly can't at the moment and it will get worse

You have to suck their dick until it kills em, OP.

Based and cocksucked

Alright I'm gonna go bitch mode and say

Don't kill people, scare them or beat them up but don't kill them. They could still have a chance to become a better person and if you take that away, you become the asshole and nothing good happens. Taser them if anything or maybe even a bat OR the best option don't go near them and maybe event talk it out like adults.

P.S. I'm the guy that said hammer earlier

it can get better but you need to place your energy in the right place.
instead of asking where to get a gun or how to kill someone why not find a hobby for you, go to the gym, learn a new skill/language or search for a job?

i got my farm job with no qualifications and experience, i didn't and don't need to pay for accomodation and i learnt on the job.

it took me a months to realise i was better. i remember it exactly.
after a day on the farm of joking around and laughing through the hard work, i went with my friends to shoot our bows {i do archery} and i was flirting with a woman who was watching, went to the gym afterwards. when i sat down on the bed i saw myself on the bed and almost cried when i realised i was happy. even said something cringy like `we made it` {talking to past self}.

since hammer guy said it, im also the guy that mentioned how easy it is to kill someone through the neck.

Well I've tried numerous times to talk it out, and it just ends in them making up something or doing something even worse. I've ignored them, and it was okay, a few comments now and again and now they're doing something even bigger by talking to people trying to get information about me and I've heard that when I'm on my way home, the 5 of them will just :beat me senseless"

whats the best way to kill yourself

by turning your life around completely and becoming someone happy.
the suicidal you is now dead.

Stab them when they are alone. Make sure there is no cameras or people. WEAR GLOVES AND A MASK. Throw the knife away in a river. Dont walk up to him where he can see you. You have to sneek up on him from behind. Dont stab his back instantly slit his throat. If you can lt stab his back and cover his mouth. Either than that use a gun with a homemade silencer. But seriously user dont kill this guy. Torture him first. Slash his tires and break all his windows. Btw fbi, i learned all of this by watching movies.

Surprise them, choke them unconscious then let the blood from their throat in a bathtub.

I get what you mean, I should be the adult and I am. I ignore them and it's not like I do something to them and they react. They do it for the fun of it. I'm probably a pussy and won't do it, but it takes so much for me to snap.

Example: What if my mother sadly passes away or kills herself (She's mentally ill) and the next day or the exact same day it happens, these 5 people go around telling others a lie or something which someone told them and then I have to deal with even more torment than before? It only takes so much.

take apart your microwave
take the transformer
remove the coil that doesnt have the plug
replace it with a thicc copper cable instead
put 1 lead up the victims asshole and the other one onto his penis
plug that bad boi in
enjoy the fireworks

hm wish it worked like that

Hammer guy again I got a tip for murder
Make mustard gas!
(I know I just talked about not killing them and whatnot but this stuff is fun to come up with)
Mix bleach
Mix ammonia or piss
Then you got MUSTARD GAAASSS!!!!
Sneak that shit through a window and be careful with it. That shit kills FAST
It stinks a bunch too so they'll notice it but they probably would just look for the smell.

Anyways *Ahem don't kill people
That's bad

Make it look like an accident. OD would be an option.

it sounds like you're in a toxic situation and the pressure is building up user.

unfortunately people are assholes, especially in school. it's something you'll have to live with and learn to deal with it. once you're out of school this bullying mentality is kicked out of most people because that shit doesn't swing in the working world. the only time people are bullies in work are when they're fresh out of school, even then they will go through multiple jobs until they realise that being an asshole isn't worth it.

it really does work like that.
there's a lot of mental effort you need to go through to end up killing yourself, if you redirect that effort into positivity you will open doors to happiness.

It is very toxic, I literally told one of them that they have made my anxiety bad to the point and he told me that it's my fault and that I should fuck off?

I literally fell out with all of them because they were giving me shit and spreading rumours behind my back and now because of an argument I had, they now want to kick the shit out of me.

And in this argument, I tried to sort things out and tell them they're fucking with my mental health and they even joke about the medication I am on. Nothing I can do

I'm just gonna put H.G. for hammer guy now

Dude If you're a kid in school or something beat the shit out of them. Everytime some guys (and girls) bullied me or a friend it ended with me beating the shit out of them (well not always you can't win them all) but that usually ends shit.
I would also work out before I got in a fight just so I would have a little muscle.

I have miraculously beat up 3 guys that cornered me and I'm a little scrawny depressed fuck.

Point is, if I can do it I'm sure you can do it too.
Hang in there dude I'm rooting for ya.
H.G.

Thanks, Hammer Guy. I just want to get on with my life, but these awful people won't leave me alone.

they sound immature and not worth it user.
i don't think you should tell them that they're making your anxiety worse or anything because that's a reaction that'll feed the bullying.
chances are that this will blow over, you might not be friends with them but it'll stop. throughout school just avoid any confrontation because it's not worth it. school can be good if you work with it and make it work, if you're being bullied then it's not going to work at all.

if anything does happen user and they do jump you, either stand your ground and fight back or run away. only kids will think you're a coward for running away and even then that wouldn't be for long.

This dude is EXTREMELY Right. Those guy will soon realize that nobody likes assholes
H.G. again

Twist their neck.

Holy shit.
>It's mexican Joker