>get really stoned at a house party >See a box of donuts that's definitely not for the party. (It was on a shelf in the pantry) >30 minutes later the people in charge stop the party and gather everyone to the backyard (where I already was). >One of the dudes is PISSED, demanding to know who "ate an entire fuckin' box of Krispy Kremes!" >say nobody was leaving until he found out. >There are about 60 people and everyone was stunned and shocked. >I'm stoned and just freeze thinking I am busted, and scared shitless >They actually skip me ("you're clear") along with several others who were outside. >I guess they figured the person left and said we could resume partying, but it kills the vibe of the party and tons of people are leaving. >overhear a girl saying "it couldn't have been user, he'd been out here the whole time" to her friends when they were discussing it. >party dies pretty quickly and mostly everyone goes to party at the house across the street (whose house belonged to one of the dudes who was at party #1)
For a good while everyone always wondered who the Krispy Kreme bandit was, and eventually pinned it on some dude who didn't do it who I actually don't know. Not sure what happened.
dude was a dickwheel for not serving those donuts at the party. he deserved to lose those donuts. fuck him.
Nathan Baker
A kindred spirit. Same experience, same setting, three quarters of an entire coffee cake kek
Kevin Carter
What a mundane thing for me to have lost my shit to. Bravo
Nicholas Green
Fatass.
Jeremiah Foster
Lmfao I was at a party once and this one guy ripped open a bag of Franzia and utterly WRECKED the carpet with red wine (apartment). Me and several others saw him do it and made that VERY clear, but the majority of the party STILL blamed it on some dude who passed out 3 hours before it happened.
Never admit guilt at a party, it's always going to get blamed on some sad fucker who's known for drinking too much. The best part is, the person they blame it on usually blacks out a lot so they just own up to it and move on lmfao
Austin Williams
I mean, I never set out to become The Krispy Kreme Bandit, but yeah, there have been a few incidents that just happen to involve donuts, since. Like, I was walking down the street, and there's this guy delivering donuts to a church. But it's night. I ask him what's up. He says it's a suicide survivor's group. They meet every Wednesday and discuss their lost loved ones. So next Wednesday I invent an aunt who killed herself, put on some crocodile tears, and help myself. I figure it's a victimless crime, the donuts are free, and the people in group feel good to have someone to listen to and someone they can be compassionate to.
Jackson Green
They were his donuts, he gets to decide what to do with them. Granted that if you have donuts out at a party that you're hosting it's polite to offer them, if he wanted them to himself he should have hidden them.
Ayden Howard
They were somewhat hidden, in that they were in a shelf in the pantry rather than out on display, where everyone would assume they were fair game. The pantry was closed, but I've always been a curious cat with a nose for donuts. The snacks were fairly banal, so I went rooting around in the pantry, and volia, the answer to my prayers. They were fresh donuts, he clearly had gotten today, probably right before the party. Krispy Kreme have a limited shelf life, so I figure I was doing him a favor.
Alexander Murphy
A long time ago out a house party a sniffed the used panties of a c list celebrity
Robert Sanders
I would watch this Simpsons episode
Nicholas Wright
>I figure I was doing him a favor. he should be thanking you.
thanks for not letting good food go to waste.
Lucas Carter
Your mom isn’t a c-list celebrity.
Jacob Hernandez
Post penis through donut with timestamp or gtfo
Christopher Anderson
Damn haven't seen one of these memes in a while
Benjamin Evans
*Sigh* Do we have to guess? Was it that chick who played Two-Face's henchwoman in Batman Forever? Not Drew Barrymore, the other one, the goth?
Sebastian Hughes
I would have left his bitchass party too
You need to destroy this dude socially but I know you won't deliver
Carter Cox
One time my room mate who is a health nut bought a whole box of unglazed krispy kreme donuts. My other room mate decide to jizz on them over the next few months and hide them in the pantry. They had a thick layers of dried cum and we were about to give them to our roomate. Then we had a party and someone ate them before we could play our prank.
He's crying over stolen donuts like a little bitch. He shows how fucking poor trash he is to all the pussy.
Far more expensive than a round of donuts and he's going to Walmart receipt that shit until the cops come what the fuck?
That's called being a punkass faggot
You either show hospitality at the very or your party ain't shit and neither are you
Carson Sullivan
>hold house party for 60 >go full psycho over donuts in front of all 60 His days as a host had better be over, for the safety of the whole community.
William Sanchez
It was Kay Panabaker
Lucas Reyes
If it could destroy him socially I'd buy him a round of donuts and steal his party guests. It was me bitch party over at my house let's ditch this loser.
There's your fucking donuts apply to become a cop
Connor Johnson
Next time trash his house brother keep it real
Charles Rogers
Too many far too many people enable faggots
You need to put these people in check
Robert Ortiz
>shows how fucking poor trash he is to all the pussy.
I saw him a couple days later and he actually complained that he couldn't get laid that night because the Krispy Kreme Bandit through off his game.
Jose Thomas
Hmm...Did she play that cute scientist on The Flash? Caitlin Snow or something? I stopped watching a couple of seasons ago, but I think she became an ice villain?
No that's Danielle Panabaker. Kay is her younger sister who was an actress briefly.
Jason Moore
Lmao you’re a douchebag but that’s fucking hilarious
Aaron Green
Punk him daily. It's like that scene in back to the future except instead of biff you're biff and you need to seriously bounce a gaynigger and go back Syria from society
Oliver Torres
Details? Did you go upstairs during the house party and actively seek out her laundry hamper? Did you return the panties?
Levi Jones
>keeping donuts for a few months nigga theyd start getting hard and moldy within a week. shut up faggot. ill never understand why some losers lie anonymously on the internet
Aiden Cruz
>a few months Donuts like every other bread/cake product goes stale after a few days and start to mold within a week. Stop your bullshitting.
Colton Phillips
>early 2000's >Friday night >go to small house party with friend >i drink 2 colt 45 >drunk as duck >leave party to crash at friends house >smoke weed on way home in park >shit faced+zooted now >get to friends house >vidya&more weed >try to leave >friends laughing cause I'm too drunk to get up stairs >turn around & sleep on couch >BOOM wake up still drunk 6am >wtf...weird wet feeling in pants >I've shit myself >check couch >it's fine >sneaking up stairs >wtf....huge wet pudding pile of shit halfway up stairs..like dinosaur size >omg was that me?! >assume it is the math adds up >continue sneaking >get out unoticed >walk home with shitty inside pants >friend calls me later that day >"dude my dog must have shit on the floor!!" >"that's wild...."
To this day no ever realized I was The Shitting Stair Bandit and that dog took the blame. Wink from the matrix; the dogs name was Hershey
Connor Price
Pussy is expensive and he's throwing a fucking party as a homeowner.
Honestly? If I don't fuck up your house and steal some shit I expect at the very least to go through your fridge for drinks and food.
Nevermind his party is lame with no sex and no comedy like justice being served for example like faggots and the wrong kind of people being bounced for this VIP shit. The fuck outta here.
Jaxson Perry
It was a house party with about 15 people in the apartment. I was high and went to use the bathroom. When I went down the hall I noticed Kay's door open. I took a peek and no one was inside. I looked back and no one was looking down the hall. My heart was racing but I walked into the room and saw a pair of white panties on the floor next to a pair of jeans. I picked up the panties and quickly sniffed the gusset. I was was afraid someone would look down the hall at any moment so I put them back and got back out.
Landon Morris
It's doughnuts who the fuck cares?
John Price
lol
Christopher Green
Yours would be. If she wasn't already a complete whore
Lol found the nigger who's never been to a party as t someone else's house. Guests will eat you dry man they don't give a fuck what shit you're offering, they'll eat that shit.
Nathan Bennett
And I'm not even fat, honestly. I just get really hungry when I'm high, and I thought the suicide scam was too good an opportunity to pass up.
>be me, fresh out of highschool and taking an extra year to finish up courses >friends invite me to university parties >this one party was particularly lame engineers being losers while trying to be cool >playing beer pong and other shit while trying to entertain ourselves >after a few drinks decide to do a little exploration >find myself on the 3rd floor in the hostess' room with 3 other people >she enters room, tells us we should not be in there >as she ushers us out of her room i spot a fire extinguisher >ohyes.jpg >grab fire extinguisher >everything starts to move in slow motion >friend who brought me tells me no as i make eyecontact >pull pin and fire off nozzle >everyone scatters, girl screams and slams door, friends scramble down the stairs >foam and residue all over the place, made it really hard to breathe, apparently that shits pretty toxic >we did not get invited back
Hunter King
Nice
Gavin Howard
I mean, I get it. He didn't want his precious donut stash raided. But he flipped out, turned off the music, actually unplugged the Xbox in the middle of a game, and started yelling at everyone. I may have crossed the line, but I think he overreacted and sort of blew his cool and the party.
Henry Evans
In real life, fire extinguishers smell really bad.
Zachary Sullivan
No dude I'm a Mexican 30 years old and I'm telling you he crossed the line. It's perfectly normal and reasonable to eat other people's refrigerators
He flipped shit like a faggot like he's gonna shoot you or sick the cops on you. Not cool at all.
Adrian Roberts
It doesn't have to be a Roman orgy but that shit sounded lame and with at least one gay nigger shoved down your throats
Zachary Williams
How much are Krispy Kremes? He can fucking buy some for his harem of bitches maybe then he'd have done enough to get his dick sucked.
Turned off the xbox and started yelling like a faggot? Kill yourselves
Gavin James
are you fucking brain damaged? or did you reply to me by accident. so guests at my party will eat literal dried moldy donuts if i set them out and offer them? retard
Xavier Adams
I would have been like "I'm the Krispy Kreme bandit" in hopes that everyone else would have said the same like me... just to keep the party raging.
Great story OP, I've literally been in your position. Stole hot pockets from a mini fridge before while baked.
Bentley White
FUCK. YOU. FATFAG. You don't go rooting around in a guy's pantry, what the fuck is wrong with you? This happened to me at a party I threw on Labor Day. I had a generous assortment of drinks out ON THE TABLE IN THE COMMON ROOM. Those were fair game, those were for the party. I had my private stash of Southern Comfort in refrigerator. IN THE FRIDGE. Nobody's supposed to go in there. That's off-limits to the party guests, but at the end of the night, where the fuck is my bottle? Some asshole like you raided it. I was too chill a host to cut the music, but I was very cautious about inviting some of those people back. Maybe you're not the type who should go to parties, autist.
Jeremiah Gutierrez
Really fridge is "off limits" at a party? Are you fucked in the head?
The fridge is were everyone puts the BYOB and someone assumed another party guest probably brought it.. and seriously southern comfort? Ur complaining about a mid-ranged priced whiskey?
Logan Nguyen
This could be your thing. Eat shit out of peoples pantries at parties so the party gets ruined
Jackson Gomez
Um. No. Maybe at other parties that's correct, but I had a table with a number of bottles set out where people could put the drinks they brought, and there were coolers filled with ice and beer. I actually had to direct one guy to the cooler when he tried to put a bottle of vodka in the freezer for some reason. There's a space for everything. A refrigerator is personal territory, for the homeowner's own food. I had clearly designated spot for the party food and drinks. You'd have to be thick or a pig to not realize that or to violate it anyway.
Ryan Morales
>Get 60 people stoned
DUDE SOMEONE ATE FOOD WHO WAS IT?!
fucking serious? No way that kind of person convinced 60 people with lives to party.
Asher Clark
Happens all the time.
I want to know how the other half lives.
Dylan Jenkins
I can't understand if you're agreeing or disagreeing. Don't invite people you don't know to a party and if you're mid thirties or younger have the income and security to know shit is getting trashed. At that age you PARTY. Not sip wine and play trivial pursuit.
Andrew Jones
Say that I steal your brand of booze and it tastes better. Not just stolen, there's glory in that.
Your memory is forever blessed over the bacardí
Except you're fucking lame and a loser.
Notice it wasn't me, the thief that looked bad or got offended but all of your guests. What was that you say? That guy's cool? Fuck you loser.
Of course you don't understand. Just kill yourself loser. You're a faggot nigger to me. Don't you have a nigger to attend to?
Luis Bailey
Is English your first language because I am sober as a jaybird and I cannot understand shit you're saying?
How many popped collars do you have?
Liam Robinson
Underrated joke
Carter Barnes
Over like rwo months this thread will be in a shitty yt video
Asher Barnes
Shut the fuck up. You learn English you little beaner.
Adrian Barnes
Okay fight club.
Noah Jackson
Nigga if youre that worried about your precious drinks, throw them under your bed for the night. Its not that big a deal. Fridges get used for BYOB. And occasionally get raided for snacks, juice, etc. If youre the type to cry, youre either poor as fuck or lack common sense.
Lincoln Martin
>don't you dare doubt I am cool,!
OH really swan? This also
Isaac Watson
It must suck to be such a broke fag, that a $17 bottle of shit ass sugar water liquor sets you off. It's a party. If you were that worried about your garbage drink, maybe you should've hidden it, instead of displaying in the one spot that literally everyone, (except you apparently), immediately looks for drinks in.
>personal territory
Let me guess. You made your guests shit in the bushes, and use their socks to wipe because the bathroom is personal territory, and you kept the toilet paper in there because you wanted it for later? Kys
Andrew Rodriguez
Right? Damn
Henry Hernandez
Bro I'm talking about the Glory of Achilles and you're a little bitch that's going to give it to the nigger that cucks you
Jose Perry
This story has many holes in it. Pun intended.
Seriously though I call bullshittery.
Thomas Long
Now this is epic XDDD
>I ate donuts > ...
The end. What a fuggen badddasss
Colton Stewart
You're mentally ill you read it that way
Like an African but a fat white cartoon
Ethan Long
Time to post this on r/greentext for mad karma. So long suckers.
Benjamin Roberts
Nobody would do that at a house party. Stop being a faggot.
Nathaniel Wood
“Personal Territory” I’m crying, you can’t be serious.
Ethan Lee
>30 year old mexican >it's perfectly normal to eat other peoples refrigerators
when you get older you will realize that only dumb asses invite tons of random strangers into their home and expect people to act legit. I know of people that would go to parties and steal toilet seats for fun. life lesson: don’t host parties
