Well user, pitch your movie idea!

>well user, pitch your movie idea!

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>female trainee fbi agent
>incarcerated fedora tipping serial killer
>fbi trainee has to get help from the classy serial killer to catch an active serial killer.l

A sexy modern retelling of Harold and Maude

>Tfw I want to tell you my pitch but I'm afraid to because I think anons are gonna steal it and pitch it irl with huge success.
Why do I have to be so fucking autistic?

>Captain Picard and the Enterprise-E watch helplessly as the planet Romulus is destroyed
>10 years later, a new crew of a new Enterprise-F attempts to keep peace between a struggling Romulan Empire and an expansionist Klingon Empire
>the Klingons are secretly supporting a faction of the Romulan military that seeks vengeance against the Federation for its failures in protecting their home world
>the crew of the Enterprise-E must foil this plot to save both the Romulans and the Federation

Black Twitter

>Humans venture into space
>War with sneks
>Secret snek romance
The age of the monster girl is upon us you cannot stop its advance.

What's stopping you from pitching it to studios?

a movie about a green frog who is so powerful that he can decide elections, advice the president and becomes the puppet master of the shadow government

It's the first Dark Souls game but set over the course of a trilogy like LotR, with Fassbender as chosen undead.
Peter Jackson directs.

>The scariest part of a horror movie is the silent moment right before a jump scare, right?
>So lets make a movie and all it is 1 hour and 30 minutes of darkness. And at the last 10 seconds a loud scream happens that scares everyone.
>Trust me the public will eat it up!

>international Jews devise a plan to take over the worlds banks, media, and governments to impose their will on the goyim
>a blue-eyed blonde fucking white male stands up to their tyranny
>a race war ensues

A Shrek movie based on IRL Shrek Stories presented in shorts

Chosin Reservior campaign Korea 1950. 30k Marines surrounded by 150k Chinese PLA.

HERES MY MOVIE IDEA INFIDELS!!!
ALLAHU ACKBAR!!!!
>blows up explosive vest

"Europe"

Marxists and Corporations work together to import millions illiterate criminals, who begin raping and killing constantly including setting up child trafficking rings where these child slaves get raped every day while the government protects them and pays them to exist on the dime of the citizens who are told to hate themselves by the government and media.

The entertainment comes from just watching how these people can keep up this facade living in a state of delusion where they have to either ignore or justify the bad things happening to them, because the consideration that perhaps importing millions of people from the middle east is a retarded idea and paying them to live is even stupider. They even voted away their right to self-defense so they have to be killed or go to prison.

It gets really redacto absurdum when the feminists in the movie have to perform extreme mental gymnastics to pitch how the hijab and being enslaved to a man is empowering to women just because their handlers are the Marxists and Corporations that comprise every party except the nationalist party, which is rendered impotent by the pseudo-democratic system that pretends to have multiple parties that are actually just 2 parties, a massive globalist party and a tiny nationalist party.

It's really a lot like Brazil the way terror attacks happen all the time and the people have to pretend it isn't happening right in front of them while the government tries to quietly brush it under the rug.

It has a lot of 1984 elements like the government fining and imprisoning dissidents who wake up and discover the chaotic state they live in, resulting in a large underground thought network. You see this surface when a journalist comes to investigate and the people plead with him to stay away before they get intimidated into silence by the government and media, who proceed to lie about and silence his existence of ever having been there and being attacked by the migrants.

I'd be more afraid of anons making fun of it

Dr. Now biopic

Oh you don't want to hear my idea, I'm not Jewish.

KELLOGG'S
CINEMATIC
UNIVERSE

Alright... this is going to blow your socks off...

A MOVIE ABOUT THE DANGERS OF THE WATER BOTTLE INDUSTRY

swap hackson with del toro and you might have something there

>this actually might become a reality in your life time

Macbeth. But instead of scotland it's set in the future. And there's mechs.
I'll take a blank cheque thanks.

>expecting me to explain my billion-worth movie idea for you to steal
lmao

Ferris beuler but he's black and the principal hates him because he's black. Girlfriend is still a super cute white girl though, obviously. Cameron is Latino, pic related.

Let the bidding war begin!!

Honestly if you take this idea to a sony exec they would love it and it would probably make lots of money. Have it stsr Kevin Hart as a black guy trying to get social media famous, the jokes write themselves because you just steal them from black social media. Have a cameo from whatever viral black kid is popular with the kids. It's like printing money.

Think Star Wars meets Winnie the Pooh

ANIME MOVIES

So what if we take 'A Serbian Film', then turn it into a reality show?

also who tf is that bee

Chains of Love, directed by Steven Spielberg.

Leonardo Dicaprio plays ruthless slave owner, "Cornelius Adkinson" in to 1800's who loves beating his property. Cornelius, his wife, and slave "Julius"(played by Idris Elba) take a train out west to visit his dying brother Thomas, but a freak tornado tears through the train, leaving only Cornelius and Julius to survive. Cornelius and Julius must learn to survive both the wild west, and each other.
Also for the oscar they both become gay for each other in the wilderness, the film ends with both of them having the chance to be rescued by a search party organized by cornelius's wealthy family, but they turn their back on society and are presumed dead.

are you jewish?

>>a race war ensues
>white boi loses it, his race is slaved

the token female/homosexual character and probably put there to advertise some honey flavored product

Sadly this will probably sell really well. I can already hear all the people trying to convince me not to drink bottle water because of what they learned in a movie they watched.

What if we take the show Videodrome from the movie Videodrome and make it an actual, unironic show?

How do you all come up with your movie ideas?

Rednecks with guns cease a hollywood studio and all of its workers to make an anti-jewish movie.

Take cool story
Put it in a cooler setting

I want Jurassic Park meets 13 hours and/or Patriots Day

Guy dies, Grim Reaper comes to get him. Guy pleads for his life, offers to play Death for his soul (30% of the audience might get that). Death refuses, he's stressed and on the clock so is having none of it.

Suddenly, as guy is resigned, Death sees a natural disaster on the tv and is celebrating. All these sudden deaths means he's allowed to hire assistants from the ranks of the angels. He hires one too many (explaining that he;s fucking Death [swearing is necessary], so "they" aren't likely to check his employment records) and sends that one to cary on his actual duties.

So Death is now chilling at this guy's house and tells him to sit down; if he goes "in" then Death will have to collect the next soul on the list, and he hasn't had a day off since Hiroshima.

Death is annoyed guy doesn't have any beer, so gives him corporeal form to go buy some. Guy is depressed and leaves to do it, so Death throws him a bone and says "remember, DON'T go see anyone, you're dead and I only have THREE days off". Guys clicks and runs off to see his fiancee.

They have a whirlwind weekend and plot to save the guy. When they get back Death is on the couch, hungover (he conjured his own beer) and watching Keeping Up With The Kardashians [sponsorship opportunity?], which he indignantly blames the guy for having on his Teevo [sponsorship opportunity?].

They try to convince dath to spare him, Death then rants for 13 minutes (times) about how he isn't the bad guy, revealing indirectly the ancient societies that pre-date huanity and how "people" always end up the same - spoiled and fearing Death when he has been central to their society for millenia, believing they deserve special treatment.

Ends with the guy going willingly, finally understanding that Death is not his enemy, but his destined final friend.

Fade to black

Miel Pops bee.

youtube.com/watch?v=eNU9AZZEnig

A boy falls in love with a girl...

Time Travel is now an Olympic sport

>explaining that he;s fucking Death [swearing is necessary]
>>>>>/reddit/

Last Rights, Directed by Roman Polanski'

An old straight male teacher, Tim Stevens (played by Sean Penn), is seduced by a young black gay male student (Idris Elba), and when confronted by the boy's father (also Idris Elba) Tim will have to choose between his life or his right to love.

>chemist visits somalia
>sees lady making mud cookies
>muh famine
>full of resolve, chemist hits the lab
>creates terraforming device that generates hyper-arable land
>neighboring nigger tribe now wants that land
>kidnap chemist, start civil war
>after 7 years of nigger strategy, side B wins
>claim the most potent, nutrient-rich land in human history
>use the soil to make mud cookies

the sequel can revolve around them stripping the terraforming device down for copper wire

>imagine a movie about emojis
>execs get out of their seats and start clapping
>millennials will love this they say

Black and Blue, directed by Steve McQueen

Danny Glover plays Ronald Jenkins, an old black harlem shopowner who has lived through years of police oppression and corruption. Hotshot young racist cop Cody Jacobs is notorious for being acquitted of the murder of Mr.Jenkins' niece tamara, who didn't do nothing. One night Ronald Jenkins discovers an officer attempting to arrest another kid(who also dindu nuffin) outside of his shop and is assaulted by an officer, who shoots and kills the kid, before turning to Ronald. Ronald in self defense accidentally pushes the officer down a flight of stairs and kills the officer. On the run from the law, Ronald makes news headlines as many speculate his intentions. The officer happened to be the mentor of Cody Jacobs, who is now on a mission to hunt down Ronald.

Mechbeth

The point is to show Death's hypocrisy

Don't feel bad, that's the sort of thing film scholars will pick up on in 50 years, I wouldn't expect the average viewer to get it first time

Prequel to TDKR where we see CIA rise up to face Bane

It's a timeless coming of age tale about a person down on their luck when suddenly, the impossible happens. There are thrills, chills, laughter, tears, and heartbreak. And just when you think all is lost, a glimmer of hope peaks through. It's a story that's never been told, with beautifully complex characters and harrowing decisions that ultimately decide their fates. A movie like this only comes around once in a lifetime.

>The love story between Roman Polanski and Samantha Gailey. 3 hours long, everything happens in real time.

a portal linking azeroth to real life earth is opened and a secretive government organization creates a team of WoW losers and agents to deal with the situation.

Ayy lmao movie featuring Greys, Nords, Reptillains, MIB, bug people, robots etc

A superhero who has to touch pussies to get his power. But he's ugly so women dont want him to.

So he rapes them.

He saves but he rapes. He rapes but he saves.

>Will Ferrell plays a goofy dad who wants to win his kids' respect
>Sean William Scott plays a fuck-up
>Ferrell decides to become the department store Santa to be cool in the eyes of his kids
>Scott also goes for the same job because selfish reasons (revealed later to be due to some deep-seated daddy issues or some such)
>wacky hijinks ensue as they compete for the Santa job
>Scott cruises the city in a Santa sled and picks up girls
>Verne Troyer or someone plays a department store elf
>at the end they become friends, Ferrell's kids begin to look up to him and Scott has Christmas dinner with Ferrell's family
Call it The Fight Before Christmas and write me a cheque.

Selfie the Movie

youtube.com/watch?v=f8OCRlLB-DQ

kek, fund it

Trilogy adaption of the Hyperion books.

Neglect Uni studies.

>Far future
>Robotic Mining vessel
>Crew is standard rag tag team
>They scan planet for life, nothing
>Historic signs of life, nothing
>All clear to deploy mining aparatus
>Mining aparatus contains a time matrix, that allows the robots to go back in time 100 cycles and begin building all the essentials
>Takes 30 days to run the acceleration program
>technical mumbojumbo about how the device converges the timelines
>scanners indicate life inside the field
>decontamination protocols ran
>life destroyed
>live comes back with a vengeance
>whole site contaminated with lifeforms
>cleanse and repeat
>days later no life
>process near completion
>life found lots of it
>wtf wtf?
>run decontamination protocol again
>all dead
>time travel system disengaged.
>no life found
>World is now covered in a super complex series of factories that begin shipping minerals to the space ship
>WARNING LIFE DETECTED
>WTF?
>Deep subterranean species of life form
>metallic nematodes that are able to interface with the robotic systems
>spaceship becomes infested with robotic parasites
>We Tremors in space now.
>Crew dies besides captain
>He uses time travel device to travel back to before ship was infested
>Spends 100 years on planet trying to stop the mining operation
>gets cleansed in a planetary wipe like a bug

>Tremors in space

KINO

It's only a matter of time before they actually make some shit like this about racis cops

>lots of disappearances in small town
> in the main character's dreams he is contacted by an entity that warns of a monster
> all of this is implie in the first scene where the main character explains to his psychogogist the nature of this entity and how items warns of bad things such as tragedies in his town
> boy must question his sanity while dealing with his last year of middle school and his future
>friends decide to help him out and go on a hunt for a monster which kills kids and adults alike
> boy also has to deal with people who think he is crazy and all the bullying he receives
> home life is also difficult
>father abuses him
> mom is dead
>in the last scene the abusivr dad is killed by monster
>monster leaves
> po-po are called because of screams being heard
> police think boy killed dad

> a bunch of theories saying the monster is really the boy's anger which he takes out on other people
>in interview, say it really is just a monster
The end

I have an idea that involves reanimating Woody Allen's corpse (production can only start after his death) and making a pseudo-live-action sort of like Space Jam biopic.

Since he is dead we can accurately act out the film's climax at Auchwitz with real but watered down Zyklon-B

This,

Really, what's stopping him? How the fuck do you pitch your ideas to a studio?

Aliens who look like humans use a numeric plan to resurrect dead humans to take over the planet

you do a Hairspray porn parody called Her Spray. Nikki Blonsky runs a hair parlor and she has some hot pornstars working for her. One night two of the pornstars are closing the shop and they have a lesbionic scene. They both end up squirting on each other and then the next morning their hair looks a billion times more lustrous. They can't explain why it happened. It's something not even the best money can buy.

Then they realize that it's because of their squirt juices. All the employees there squirt on each other, and their hair becomes the best advertising for their business. They set up booths just for squirting, but they don't tell the customer what it is - the customer sits in a chair, lays back, and an employee masturbates and squirts on their hair.

Business is booming and Nikki Blonsky is a billionaire. But she never wanted to have someone squirt on her because she isn't comfortable with her sexuality. The ending scene is Nikki biting the bullet and all of her employees have a lesbian orgy with her, and for the moneyshot every employee squirts on Nikki. The next day Nikki comes in with her hair in a massive, silky beehive (like the attached pic but it's entirely natural hair) thanks to all the squirts.

We could get Nikki to do this. I NEED Nikki to do this.

Cut it to 1 minute 30 seconds and you might have something.

>Open up Wikipedia
>"Top movies of 1980s"
>Pick a year
>Pick a top ten film
>We're going to remake it, only with a fresh, gritty new vibe.

a spiritual sequel to "Road to Wellville" that focus's on two doctors fresh out of med school

the doctors earn their living curing women of "hysteria" by finger banging them (as was the custom of the time). MC gets despondent over not having a real medical career but his buddy who is kind of a lech loves the job.

things get crazy when a frenchmen comes on the scene with a fancy new "massager" that threatens to put them all out of business. hijinks ensue as they try to save their practice, but inevitably have to get out of the masturbation game.

James Franco as MC
Seth Rogan as buddy doctor
Leslie Jones as no nonsense assistant
Sacha Cohen as french antagonist

You're right, I'll just call up some movie studio and tell them I'm some nobody with a good movie idea and ask for an appointment

how would a person with no connections pitch a movie idea? or let's say that a person has a 10/10 script. what do they do with it? how do they sell it? why am I asking you?

Santa Claus vs Easter Bunny
Tagline: "Whoever wins, kids lose a holiday"

>Easter Bunny launches a surprise attack on Santa's workshop, killing his wife and many Elves
>Bunny wants to destroy the spirit of Christmas
>Santa stands his ground and declares war with his Elf army
>Easter Bunny has an army of chocolate golems
>Huge violent battle visually similar to the Clone Wars
>Santa Wins the war but Easter Bunny escapes...

Sequel
Santa Claus vs Easter Bunny: Rise of the Tooth Fairy

>mega wealthy family
>need to hire a new butler as the old one dies or some shit
>as part of the vetting process they stage a fake robbery and see how butler reacts
>this time its real
>butler is like ex SAS
>film just turns into a raid like movie
>butler kills all thieves
>doesnt take the job

haha this made me laugh

also the thieves are actually a band of his old army buddies and some randoms who find out what hes doing and think they can flip him to help them steal shit

and the butler is jason statham

>female hillary type president as lead
>lefties think it's going to be an anti trump flick
>bomb goes off in crowded subway
>man happens to be taking a video on his phone
>phone still on
>captures images of government agents setting bomb and re organizing scene after explosion
>kill people because no survivors
>made to look like russian terrorism
>family recovers mans phone
>race against the clock to spread the video
>too hot for any major news outlet to touch
>agents attempting to recover the phone
>pretty much the rest of the movie is like hackers
>president arrested after investigation
>directed by mel gibson

chris pratt is a weeaboo faggot living in his parents crawlspace which he converted into an anime dungeon. every square inch of the cinderblock walls is covered in wallscrolls and katana holders and dvd boxsets of anime and mangas. one evening there's a bad storm and he rushes to unplug his janky tv/dvd player combo. lightning strikes the antenna which is hooked up to Chris's tv/dvd player combo and the electrical storm creates a sentient anime villain that leaps out of the tv. Chris defends himself for a brief moment using his hanzo steel but the anime villain cuts through his sword and slices chris's face causing a cool anime scar. Chris barely escapes after tipping over his anime dvd boxset collection, causing an avalanche that buries the anime villain.

From then on Chris is being hunted by the sentient anime villain but he's also being followed by a sentient anime girl who manages to jump from newspapers to televisions to comic books. she keeps trying to warn him, and they slowly become friends and eventually lovers. In the end Chris outsmarts the sentient anime villain by causing another electrical storm which strikes Chris with lightning, sending him into the world of anime while the sentient anime villain is left behind on planet earth. Chris gets to have sex with the anime girl, he gets to live as an anime, and the anime villain hates the real world so he kills himself.

I call it "Chris Pratt vs the Sentient Anime Villain"

Ryan Gosling goes out for a motorcycle ride when he gets hit by a truck. His organs get transferred to Tom Hanks, a celebrity who has some kind of disease.
Hanks visits Gosling's wife to thank her for her husband's organs, and they end up fucking. While this is happening, it turns out Gosling can control Hanks' body for some reason, and stomps his wife's head in.
To get revenge for Hanks fucking his wife, Gosling makes him go on a crime spree and disgrace himself.

Imagine this... Land Before Time meets Lost Highway

gayniggers from the center of the earth