/balt/ + /ausnz/

We aren't really gay edition.

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vocaroo.com/i/s0UOz0cfSFBE
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en.wikipedia.org/wiki/High_rising_terminal
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No gays allowed edition

I'm ready to bully some nerds, have you seen any?

>pig skins

I have memorized the entire dialogue to Modern Major General, and most of Tom Leher's Periodic Table song. B-but I'm not a nerd though, so fug yerself, Chad.

If you wanted to see stuff.

I know I just copied the picture from the show but it’s still mine I swear desu.

I DIDN'T MEAN TO SHOW MY FOOT GOD DAMN IT

I'm right here sweaty. x

you on the left
wow looks good, also nice feet

Me in the photo

Congratulations, you are one step up from tracing.
Nigga that ain't a sketch

Too late kiddo
it's a really nice foot though, post more close up

Nope no nerds here, this is strictly a cool kids general.

haha nerd

you on the left
*breaks your glasses*
Are you gonna cry little nerd?

Th-thanks.
I-I don't wanna. Already feel bad about my foot.
S-sorry. I'm new to this I'm trying to find hobbies.

p-please don't
I need those to see
I'll do anything

Wait, it's not a dialogue, it's a monologue.
vocaroo.com/i/s1NRLU7u1oWR
I am not nigger I am pajeet
show bobs
B-but I'm not a nerd, I'm a tuff guy who fucks women and doesn't take no shit from homos

Yes it is. :(

Lads one question,
Does sexually harassing boys for pictures of themselves on an anonymous anime image-board count as a hobby?

pig skins are very popular in bulgaria. you have a nice voice and accent, are you really a pajeet?

You have a nice voice.

Yes. Not that fun for me. I already gave you my feet and my arm hairs what else do you want you monster?

>You planning on going for a swim at the beach this summer?
Not -that- big a masochist
I always preferred walking round the south coast anyway

Sure.
Is it a helpful and healthy hobby that will improve certain skills and nurture a creative mindset?
That's debatable.

you want to see my dick?

b-boipussi...

Oh, I thought it was swimmable in summer.
Come with me to the bay of plenty desu, Waihi beach is bretty gud.

Finding creative ways to trick him into revealing his body? Sounds like a plan

Really? it seems like there are a lot of nerds here, I can smell their fear
Anything you say... hmmmmm
>B-but I'm not a nerd, I'm a tuff guy who fucks women and doesn't take no shit from homos
you're not fooling anyone nerd
Don't worry I'm pretty sure that applies to most people here

Gonna take my dog for a walk brb ladies :3

Oh you actually have a dog, I thought "walking the dog" was code for having a wank

>ywn be a plaything
Why live?

>it seems like there are a lot of nerds here
They must've gotten lost.
Bully them into submission.

Cute dog!

yorkies are pretty annoying and yappy

They are? I have a friend from Bulgaria.
Th-thanks, anons
vocaroo.com/i/s0WmKxeqhIjY
Man I can't do an Aussie accent at all, but here ya go
B-but I fug women and stuff I swear.

I can't answer that
>Bully them into submission.
I think most of the nerds here are already pretty submissive

>Oh, I thought it was swimmable in summer.
Probably, I just don't have much padding
I was going to say Mt Maunganui is one of the few beaches I've enjoyed swimming at, but Waihi sounds good
Right by the site of the famous strike

yeah, in bulgarian they're called пpъжки or джyмepки in my dialect
prajki. the a is pronounced like the u in but and the j is pronounced like like the s in casual

Well Waihi is a good 15 minutes drive from Waihi beach, they still mine gold in the quarry though it's pretty crap in there.
Plenty of old school mining memorabilia around.

how big is new Zealand(Nya Zeeand in Swedish)?

:3

So prooski?
vocaroo.com/i/s1aUgDd7oiMh

Nerds need to learn their place. They're got no game, they don't enjoy dominating women, so naturally their place is under men who do like being in control. It's just the yin and the yang, my mang.

btw pig skins are pork rinds, right?

Big enough for you
trust me

no, in "but" the u isn't elongated and in casual the s sounds like the j in jean (the french name).

it's a tough word for foreigners, don't worry about it. i was giving it to you just so you can remind your friend about them.

Bigger than it looks, just narrow

Uhm, pork rinds are more like fried pig fat. Chewy but also hard and crunchy. Where as skins are more puffier and saltier.
The nigger food you're thinking of is Chitlins, or Chitterlings. It's literally just pig bowels, and they smell like raw sewage.
He's just Bulgarian descent. He's visited Bulgaria, but was raised in America, sorry, should have been more clear about that.

>Big enough for you
>trust me

... :3
i always thought it was very small, like an island but lately i learnt that its as big as my country owo

Want to find out how big we really are?
I can give you some firsthand experience

is pic related pig skins? how do you make them like that?
in bulgaria we also eat bowels, but you're supposed to wash them thoroughly to get rid of the smell of literal shit. and we also eat lamb and veal bowels, not pig bowels as far as i know.

y..yes OwO

Yeah those are skins. Pretty good tasting, especially when they're cooked just right. Not so soft they stick to your teeth, or too crunchy they're hard to eat.
I've heard stories from blacks that claim to have found corn in the chitterlings. Good grief.
I've had lambschops, but not lamb bowels.
There's a joke about nigs, that mainly only older people say in private:
>Niggers will eat everything but the squeal off a pig.

BIG SWEDISH COCK
split new zealand dick

>fat aussie chode

>firsthand experience
wew

and don't think you're getting out this either mister!

that's a good joke. for lamb bowels, you can try to find a greek restaurant, they eat them too. they're pretty fucking good.

Back from my dog walk
Nice accent user :3
M-My boipussy is off guards. Besides we discussed this week how there is no one around to help me shave it to look cute d-desu

Don't keep me in suspense

That's a Labradoodle desu.

is it yappy?

You're supposed to shave it yourself; don't be lazy user. Being cute takes some effort!

She's very quiet and doesn't shed at all.
Why can't you come over and help me desu?

You want to see it that badly eh?
You really are a pervert aren't you

Can't say we have any Greek restaurants. Raleigh might have them. Here's it's mostly just banks and steakhouses. A few Chinese restaurants.
Thanks, Aus-kun...
vocaroo.com/i/s0UOz0cfSFBE

>tried not to specify state
>mention state capital
I'm just retarded, damn.

I want all the senses to be involved

beeeeecause, user...I don't have teleportation powers :(

but I am an expert on hair removal!

why would you not want to mention your state?

btw i hate bbq sauce but last week i heard about a mustard based bbq sauce and that honestly sounds good. have you tried it?

Sure,
You'll see it, then touch it, then smell it and finally taste it.
I'm not sure how you'll hear it.

This is my voice. M-my voice isn't this bad in real life I swear I'm using a turtle beach mic which is awful d-desu.
vocaroo.com/i/s16hzdyYTvJ8
>but I am an expert on hair removal!

I'll pay for your ticket if I have to! Please help desu :3

Cute voice, I want to hear you scream in pleasure.
>6' 70kg
cute, CUTE
Bit tall tho

The sound of it slapping my face, hopefully

Hmm I see
I'll blind fold you so you'll never see it coming and you'll get a mouthful when you least expect it.
I do expect you to swallow

wow, I didn't expect you to be a fat lanklet

I'm a slim guy. I'm trying to work out my muscles though which can make me a little sweaty.
F-fat lanklet? user STOP I'M SLIM AAAH

biggest tip is shave in hot water because it opens your pores, then rinse in cold water as it closes the pores. That reduces nasty red bumps and gives you silky smoothness :o

Also, moisturize with lotion or aloe vera

Or try "magic shave powder" as it works well.

THEN post cute pics!

If that's the case, I actually have a question.
I used nair on my legs, the first time it worked , though it left the roots of the hair, and the second time it gave me all these red bumps. But when ever I shave my legs, I get razor burn, not quite like the nair bump, but sort of similar. What do you do?
Let me find this google docs I saw on hair removal and post it.
You mean honey bbq sauce? It's good on chicken tenders.
T-that's tall. You sounded cute, user! I like Aussia accents. They sound like something cool is about to happen.
vocaroo.com/i/s1YU7bwYzqHZ

We can't all be 5'4, 40kg like you

I want you to take photos of you flexing your sweaty body next time you work out.

Oh, I recently bought some moisturizer like you said. I got some shower moisturizer, and some exfoliatator scrub, which I use on my face specifically, and the rest of my body in the shower. Along with some lip balm that's really glossy.
>tfw you want to wear lip tint to make your lips a little brighter but the only people who flirt with you are fags in their 60's or nigs

>I do expect you to swallow
I wouldn't dream of doing anything else

But I'll expect a deep kiss afterwards, to check you've taken it all in.

>We can't all be 5'4, 40kg like you
no bully, I'm not that small

Don't lie to me, I had trouble finding you at first because I didn't think to look down at the ground.

Thanks for the tip user. W-wait what is "magic shave powder". This sounds like something either lewd or dangerous.
Th-thank you. You might be talking about this desu en.wikipedia.org/wiki/High_rising_terminal
vocaroo.com/i/s0qqJp11Owrh
O-ok. Do you want my wrists or my upper arm?

can you stop being gay for a second

I've never used nair, although I have used the magic shave powder (amazon), and it worked well.

Definitely do the hot water and try to shave it all in the shower, and rinse with cold water, even though it's unpleasant in the winter.

Use a sharp razor blade, pref with numerous blades. Try to shave each area only once, this reduces irritation which leads to red bumps. I just use sensitive skin shaving cream to do it. trim beforehand if you're lazy about being cute >.>

and moisturize the heck out of it right after!

see i'm not lying!

>Do you want my wrists or my upper arm?
Both

ps if you figure out how to remove the roots do tell

This pic made me diamonds

Stop! it's not nice to bully people you dumb lanklet
c-cute...

W-why was the pic deleted?

I want a diamond and a wedding dress...well mostly the dress hah

Oh, upspeak, yeah.
vocaroo.com/i/s0vGuDVqGQKR
Are you the aussie who was a banker?
Aus accents just make me think of riding around on a jeep and hearing top notch banter being screamed to me from the passenger seat. Really want to visit Australia one day, but, much like my ancestral home, Scotland, I feel like they'd just make fun of me.
This.

The glorious China

...why do you want a wedding dress?
I just want cute boi thighs

cause imma go to bed and I didn't want to derail too much

and probably get banned!

Where would you like them?

funnily enough, this accent makes you sound more like a pajeet

naw naw naw.
Bulge posting probably wont get you band, qtpie.

if this was carmageddon he'd get so many points

cause it's cute~ I love white and lace heh

it has in the past, but who knows mods may be more lazy these days