DUDE I'M DRUNK AND WITTY LMAO

DUDE I'M DRUNK AND WITTY LMAO

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Dude lets visit some starving peasants in a third word shit hole and eat their food

>It's another Sup Forums hates the cool kids episode
Good stuff.

He stopped being a cool kid a very long time ago

He doesn't drink because he is an addict. He is literally brain damaged. He just shits on normal people and eats at 3 star restaurants us plebians can only dream about then talks down to us.

I hate him but Sup Forums thinks he is kino.

>earring
wow we get it le edgy grandpa

>cool kid
more like an old jew

Talks down to who? You're a vegitarian cuck aren't you?

he makes food interesting, that's an achievement by itself

...

This.

wait a sec i saw him drink a beer on his show you liar

>He doesn't drink
umm....

>instagram.com/p/BP81yUhFe-b/

this guy is an asshole

he is a literal cuck

returnofkings.com/96740/return-of-kings-correctly-predicts-the-demise-of-anthony-bourdains-marriage

>returnofkings.com
lol. nice try.

>being blue pilled

>honestly believing in facile simplifications of reality using terminology derived from the fucking Matrix
lmaoing @ ur life rn

get a load of this whiteknight

*visits an upscale 3 star restaurant in the heart of a vienna*
>doesn't have a single good thing to say about it, complains about the crowd
*visits some shanty high up in the mountains to eat some peasant's braised goat rectum*
>oh wow this is divine, so succulent, this is otherwordly

get a load of this [insert memeword here]

spot on textual impersonation user, totally read that in his voice LMAO DESU m8 :DDD

i really did though, good job man seriously

DUDE I'M SOBER AND SHITPOSTING LMAO

I really hate Anthony Bourdain, he's a narcissistic shit that is obsessed with that "everything about america is bad" meme.

They should have gotten this kino master to host parts unknown. Alton Brown would have been acceptable too.

/thread

>triggered Americuck too patriotic to think for themselves
wew

>Bourdain
>cool
Sure thing Gramps.

>visits the congo
>old guy says that when belgium was in charge things were great
>everything has gotten worse since they left
>uhh wow, what do you say to someone who thinks colonialism was good

Japanese guy: You know, we like rock music in Japan too
Bourdain: Of course *drinks from tiny glass of beer*

Bourdain is based you fucking redditor.

burnout that got lucky, he will inspire a brand new generation of burnouts that won't though, X^D~

t. hasn't watched any of his shows in the last 5 years

He's fucking insufferable now and that's putting it lightly

DUDE I WOULD TOTALLY HAVE A BEER AND HANG OUT WITH HIM HAHA

> No Reservations tv show
> Visit Haiti
> Eat lots of food in front of hungry children
> Do the right thing and buy out the rest of the food for the kids
> Kids fight for the food
> Regrets for intervening

whoops didn't mean to quote

dude I'm a chef so let's make my travel show about me bitching about white people and shit instead of food lmao

what else could you possible want in life other than those two things

happiness.

a Buzz Lightyear toy that one christmas when I was like 3

He's only been insufferable since his Italian wife left him. You can see the "just" in his eyes in Parts Unknown episodes as soon as the divorce proceedings started, he alludes to being depressed and that life has no meaning like 20 times and Evey time he meets a beautiful woman (like in the Georgia episode or the Rome episode ) you can see him open up more than usual.

pretty sure he's happy right now since he's banging based Asia Argento

Dude FOIS GRAS
Dude GENTRIFICATION SUCKS, FUCKING HIPSTERS LMAO (damn this fois gras hotdog in the outskirts of NYC is great)

DUDE PEASANT FOOD IS LE SOPHISTICATED NOW YOU POOR PLEBS. NO REASON TO REVOLT.

Not this.

Is that the girl he met in Rome ?? I knew it ! I fucking knew it ! I knew they must have banged during filming that. In fact I didn't know he had divorced Octavia I just felt the sexual tension between the two especially when she took him to her "hidden restaurant"

It's beautiful but

>An ex heroin addict who constantly drinks and smokes tobacco
>Existing in any realm of true happiness

It's like you don't know what it takes to be happy

why did I laugh?

i only eat at 5 star restaurants

>WITTY
no
>cool
no
>interesting
no

>>An ex heroin addict who constantly drinks and smokes tobacco
>>Existing in any realm of true happiness
>It's like you don't know what it takes to be happy
do you armchair heroin addicts believe this or what?

america is objectively and unarguable the best country in the world in every single way. even our politicians are the most corrupted of the entire world, and our country runs better than every single other one of them.

You either love anthony bourdain or you hate everything that is good about life

>Reddit
>Reading comprehension

Pick one

I was literally describing the opposite of what you understood but k

>>WITTY
>no
It was sarcasm Timmy.

He thinks he's the fucking Hunter S Thompson of food and that's enough to make me hate him

>trusting someone who smokes to know what flavor is

Cmon now

You cunts keep talking about based Tony when you obviously never watched a single episode of no reservations. He is the most self aware, self loathing ""celebrity" there is, which is why everyone opens up to him. He is genuine and has real charisma. He won't bullshit anything, when the Muslim rape attacks happened in Germany he was there and interviewed a refugee and put them on the spot.

When he's in a good mood he'll tell you (Croatia, Emilia Romanga..) when he's in a shit mood he doesn't hide it (Evey single episode after his divorce, Evey single Russia episode, Iceland..)

PS he never ever calls himself good at cooking. In fact he always alludes to the fact that any chef he meets is better than him and drops spaghetti in front of the cameras in the rare occasions he's had to cook (like in Provence episode)

Oh man I watched all of No Reservations and I probably read Kitchen Confidential five times.

The problem is that I watched The Layover and Parts Unknown too.

I've seen only a few episodes but he seemed pretty chill
Is he really condescending? That's the quality I hate most in people

Don't listen to that fucking fag. Im going full ABDF here but seriously don't deny yourself the pure comfy pleasure of watching no reservations for the first time. Especially European episodes. It's the best thing ever made for television (after m*a*s*h)

Burnouts that kind of put their shit together are the coolest guys.
Craig Ferguson too

Nothing worst then people on television being witty and interesting. That's just awful.

>ABDF
Adult baby diaper fetish?

>DIVERSITY IS THE ONLY WAY

Fake wit and actual wit are two very different things.

Everyone on television is fake though. They're entertainers, they get paid to make jokes.

>>Reading comprehension
>Pick one
>I was literally describing the opposite of what you understood but k
I was just repeating what you said, what? how fucking dense are you?

>and our country runs better than every single other one of them.
don't make me die from laughter here, you delusional retard