Most alpha fucking thing you've ever done in your life

most alpha fucking thing you've ever done in your life

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Was the fastest sperm

Scratched the shit out of some whores pussy just for fun

tfw you didn't even cum in his ass, seems pretty beta to me

sucked a guy's cock once

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Raped a 9/10 girl at a party after she rejected me earlier.

Coworker called me up & told me his neighbor was harassing him
Went to work got coworkers
All of us 6,4+
We walked into his neighbors house like we owned it, surrounded them one of us grabbed a beer from their fridge asked them if they fucking had any problems with coworker, they slumped down in their chairs and meekly said no, told them if they Ever said anything again we would be back left.

Hot got a story to share?

I fucked a buddy's wife while he watches. She came and "she doesn't come from piv".

I made waffles one day... with three different types of chocolate chips.

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I was at a party shamelessly and stupidly flirting with this chubby Russian woman. She was cute and thrilled to meet someone who was actually interested in her language.

She was there with her boyfriend, who was a friend of my older brother. My brother is a bitch though, and when this dude wrestled him, my brother didn't fight back.

I heard about their "fight" from some stranger, saying "hey dude your brother's in the kitchen in a fight." I knew what was happening immediately.

I crouched down and told the guy plainly "if you don't let my brother go I will rip you off of him."

The guy said "fuck off," and tightened his grip on my brother's reddening head.

I got behind him and snaked my arms between and around his. I jerked, and his arms just snapped back, exposing his front. My brother got out, and I rolled this idiot face first onto the kitchen tile. All our weight was on his face, and he couldn't do shit.

After that, I took his girlfriend outside and fucked her raw on the hood of the guy's car. She gave me her panties. Leopard Print.

I live in my car as a preface and frequently chill at a local TA with a BP gas station.
>having a smoke sittin in a parking space with my windows down
>up rolls a red jetta, a few spaces away from me in this empty bit of the lot
>a guy arguing with presumably his girlfriend
>they get out and continue to argue as they go inside
>come out with Popeyes, still arguing
>guy is basically screaming at her at this point
>slaps her in the face, drops the Popeyes
>yell at him out my window to quit being a prick
>just responds with fuck you and gives me the bird
>white knight homeless user engaged
>get out, start walking over to him
>”what, you gonna do something faggot?”
>just walk up and kick his ass into his trunk
>beat the back of his head into the edge of the trunk a few times
>he’s crying like a bitch, girl is freaking out
>get back in my car, pull out, back into the side of his jetta before leaving
>never saw them again, never go back to the TA

My proudest moment tbh, only cool thing I’ve ever done
Fuck woman beaters

I'm guessing milk chocolate was best?

Post story fag

Nothing for green text. I was drunk and feeling confident so I started flirting with a girl way out of my league. She laughs and flirts back a little but shoots me down anyway. I bide my tome and waited for an opportunity and pulled her into an unused spare room. It was dark but I covered her face with a t shirt for good measure. I wrestled her down and raped her on top of some rolled up carpet. Best feeling ever.

Nope. Strawberry.

strawberry chocolate chips?

They make those?!

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Pulled a knife on some guy at a party because he sexually harassed my friends girl and she came to us bawling her eyes out, then she broke up with my friend because he didn't stand up for her like I did. We became friends with benefits for a year.

Yep. Semi-sweet, white, and strawberry chocolate chips.

I played Affliction warlock in Legion. Boom bitch! Gotcha faggot.

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you

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Got a few:

>When I was 16 I was hanging out with my gf and group of friends. there was a girl in this group who was a huge slut with huge tits and she liked me, everyone knew it. She was also hotter than my gf who started getting fat at that time. We're in a hotel room party and this girl comes over and sits in my lap (she did this a lot but it never went further than that). So we're sitting there and my gf is jealous, slut girl takes note. So she takes my hands and puts them on her big tiddies - I was shocked but I like tiddies, so I felt her up pretty good right in front of my gf while she watched. GF got mad and I got up and said "What's wrong" - then we left the hotel room, she was telling me I shouldn't touch other girls tits, I told her it was no big deal and "you know how slut girl is" and I convinced her it was OK to touch slut girls tits because everyone else did too

next:

>meet 9/10 chinese girl on dating website when I'm like 18 yr old and single. we go out, shitty time. she talks about her ex bf the whole time and some guy who was drowning her in shots the night before to get into her pants, somehow she thinks this date is going really well tho. asks me to take her home, so I agree. I drive her roughly to her area (within 5 blocks.. shes in the major city) and I stop. She asks why I stopped so far away, I told her "here's your stop" and she looks at me like I'm retarded. I tell her she needs to get the fuck out of my car - she still doesn't get it, but agrees to leave. This bitch thinks the date went well still, she leans in for a kiss and I snub her, totally ignored. she just sits there like a retard waiting to kiss. While she sits there I put the car in gear and drive up to an alley way next to a bunch of homeless black guys and tell her "here's your stop" and to get out of my car. She gets out and still tells me to call and text her, I tell her she's retarded and I drive away into the night

Had a co-worker that had the hots for my GF (now ex). She and I were having an argument over the phone while I was on my lunch break and I said some kind of well deserved mean shit to her. He came around the corner like the fucking white knight he was saying “I just don’t know why she’s with you”. His point being she was very attractive, made good money good family etc. I was already heated from the conversation so I just coldly looked him in the eye and said “well it’s not my looks or my money, you do the fucking math”. He looked confused for just a moment, then I literally saw the wind fall out of his sail. Pretty much never spoke again other than the necessity of work topics.

Omg same dude

Had a female coworker who I would send home to her boyfriend, filled with my cum. At our Xmas party, I walked right up to him, introduced myself and grab his beer out of his hand, drank the whole thing and left.

This is actually the best thing here, hands down
Sounds delicious

Fucked an 11yo girl while her younger brother and sister watched

>Be me (6'2/189cm 275lbs/125kg of strongk.gif)
>Out with coworkers for a birthday
>One of the coworkers doens't want to come to the 3rd venue of the night
>slips away quietly
>She's a solid 8/10, and dumb as dog shit
>Not wanting her to be raped by some faggot and his buddies I go looking for her to make sure she gets a cab safely
>Walking alone through main street
>Group of beta bitch boy manlets walking towards me as I'm crossing the road
>One of them decides to bump me with his shoulder
>I turn and say "You fucking alright mate?"
>Him and his friends turn and he says "Yeah what do you want cunt?"
>"Well you just bumped into me, so I'll ask again, are you alright cunt?"
>He and his friends walk up gearing for a fight
>I step right up to him and grab him by his shirt and lift him clear into the air
>Holding him up in a reverse lion king
>His mates shit bricks
>I pull him in closer to my face
>"Now fuck off before I stove your fucking head in."
>His friends are already legging it before his feet touch the ground.

Australia has some major faggots who think they're tough. Most carry knives because gun laws and they're descended from convicts so genetics are not their strong suit. Scare tactics and a big show is pretty much all they are.

>Never found coworker, apparently she bullrushed her way into a cab.
>Would have loved to bullrush myself into her sweet arse

Had a threesome (2 girls) I’m going for a law degree next

ATTENTION STRAIGHT MEN AND BUDDIES WHO LIKE TO BULLY!!! - Looking for guys who would be genuinely interested... im 24 yo, 6’2, 170lbs, white, red headed gay male. My thing is, I like to be humiliated by STRAIGHT, sadistic, HETEROsexual men who would get a kick out of this and no sexual gratification. By that I mean, I’ll go on cam butt ass naked, write whatever you tell me to write on myself with sharpie. Stick random things up my ass (flashlight, end of a light bulb, sharpie... whatever I can find near) give over personal information about myself, passwords to personal accounts and you can expose me. Feel free to screenshot me, laugh at me, grab a buddy to join you in laughing at me. I’m not trolling, just looking for any straight men who would at least want a conversation about this.... please be of age (18+) and have access to a mic and cam if you’re interested! Add me on discord @ DumbassFaggot#8613

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Fuck off

Imagine if she was just genuinely an awful person lmao

fag cunt

Woah we should start a club

Go on?

Not me but a friend's story

>My friend, big guy, co-owned a bar
>Regular saturday night
>Lots of people having a great time
>Group of dickheads out for a bucks
>One of them decides to get a bit too drunk
>My mate tells him he needs to either calm it down or it's time to leave
>He and the group decide it's time to leave
>ButWaitTheresMore.avi
>Shitlord gets to the front door decides to pull his pants down and flash his unwashed arsehole to everyone in the bar
>My mate saw this coming from a mile away and was already en route to get him out of the bar quicker
>He grabs this kid (19ish) by his throat and lifts him in the air as he runs him out the front door
>Shot put throws this kid down the stairs of the bar
>Cut to the guy checking IDs at the bottom of the stairs
>His face when a half naked kid flies through the air next to his head gasping for air (pic related)

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>"Now fuck off before I stove your fucking head in."
Thats the best shit ive ever heard

ok beta

mad lad

literally a female

Sounds like a larp

>Be me 22
>Invite random girl I knew through mutual friends to hang out and drink
>She's a 19 6/10 short, skinny, okay face.
>She agrees and we get to drinking because I just wanted company to get drunk like usual.
>She's only had 2 drinks, I'm like 10 in and barely drunk
>I lean over and say "hey, can I kiss you?" We pretty much immediately make out
>Making out she undresses herself as I strip while she's stroking me.
>I eat her out, then she rides me for like an hour because I can't finish because of alcohol.
>I get up put pants on, because landlord is home.
>She asks me "so when should we announce were dating?"
>I say "we're not"
>she replies with "but I cheated on my boyfriend with you"
>I reply "yeah... i'm going to go shower, I smell like sex"
>Shower
>Return and she's still naked, tell her to "go get dressed"
>Drop her off at her home

I was a complete drunk douchebag
But she kept hitting me up for drunk sex even with her having a boyfriend after that, never once used a condom.

Fucked three girls in a night ... separately. Had a drink with the bf of one right after I did his girl.

Fucked two girls with the same name on the same day.

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At one point she invited me to go get some food, turns out it was her sisters birthday party, she announced me as her boyfriend even though Facebook said she had a boyfriend. I made an excuse and left. Her boyfriend was out of state for a family death and we fucked for like 2 weeks straight while I was completely wasted. A few months later she tells me she's pregnant and her results literally place it to where I'm the only one who could be the father. She tells her boyfriend it's his and he posts all over Facebook how proud he is he's going to be a father. She miscarriages a few weeks later and he's devastated and posts about how upset he is about how his child died and he's so upset. They are still together 5 years later

Why didn’t y’all become a couple?

Made out with two girls who were BFFs and spent every day together but had never kissed or anything until the three of us started in. The sexual tension between them was like Nagasaki but they were too anxious to try until I unlocked it for them. The next night I traded oral with one of them in a hallway I thought was unused and a friend walked in on us.

...they also had the same first name.

Technically the fastest sperms are the cucks because they do all the work of weakening the egg membranes before a Chad late straggler comes in to fertilize it. So for once in your life, you were a Chad.

Congratulations you and she are cunts of the highest magnitude.

She was just a side thing. I met my wife at work and after I got engaged we went our separate ways.

At one point in college, I fucked 6 girls in a 7 day stretch. I could have gone 7 for 7, but on the last day, I had a chick in my room and got too drunk to convince her to cheat on her boyfriend. I think she danced for me in her panties while I jerked off.

GF told me I wasn't all that and I couldn't have any girl I wanted so I slept with her, her 3 cousins, her best friend, and every female friend I had and sent her the proof.... then I married her we have a beautiful baby boy.

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>Be me in 2007
>15 years old at the time
>Go up state with my friend for another friend's birthday party
>Cue underage drinking
>Birthday girl is cute, emo chick with a total beta boyfriend
>my friend and I both crush on this girl but we're both too beta to do anything about it
>Her friend takes a liking to me and my friend
>she starts doing her best to flirt with us
>Birthday girl cracks the shits
>Party goes on and people leave/go to bed
>Me and my friend are on a fold out couch in the lounge room
>Birthday girl between us
>Her brother is sitting on a chair next to the bed
>We swap stories of dickheadism and fun days gone by
>Brother goes to bed
>3 of us on bed talking about life and the universe and some such
>Birthday girl guides my hand under blankets to her monsoon wet pussy
>Start doing my best attempt at finger blasting her
>Takes a while but she starts moaning and enjoying
>Friends face is full of shock, delight, fear, everything his poor 15 year old mind could come up with in the situation
>He rips the blanket back
>i start power fingerfucking her in front of him
>She cums like a freight train
>Immediate ragrets
>She goes back to bed with her boyfriend
>"Did you fuck him?"
>"No he just fingered me"
>WHYTELLHIM.exe
>Me and friend go to sleep

>Cut to next morning
>everyone walking around the house a bit sore from all the drinking
>Brother is blasting music
>Fallout boy - Where is your boy tonight?
>AreYouFuckingKiddingMe.gif
>Breakfast time and we all sit at the table
>Me and my friend on one side
>Opposite us is birthday girl and her boyfriend
>On the ends of the table are birthday girl's brother and mother
>Boyfriend is literally staring right through me
>Smile at him while I munch on my weet-bix
>He cucks and starts sobbing over his rice bubbles

I just fucked my husband Gary while his boyfriend sucked my cock. I feel pretty fucking alpha rn.

Same.. I had a Friday and Saturday off work. Had the girl from the story stay the night fucked her all night and morning and dropped her off in the morning, I pull up to my house head in and shower. Get out of the shower and my phone rings. It is my ex-girlfriend and she says she's at my front door, immediately she begins blowing me till I cum while I finger her ass(she told me a few days before she likes anal play), she swallows my cum even says "wow, not much cum this time" I say "ehh I'm just a little dehydrated" and I eat her ass and fuck her till she has to leave to go to work.
Perfect timing because i have a date to see wreck it Ralph with some random.
She was a dud and couldn't hold a conversation so I got up a girl I had lined up to see a movie... Wreck it Ralph xD we had some hot chocolate and fucked at my house nearby, I dropped her off because she had plans with family. I hit up another girl from some dating app and she wants to meet up.. fuck it, ask if she wants to see wreck it Ralph and she says "yeah" take her to the movies and my buddy who works the ticket booth is literally laughing his fucking ass off because he's sold me the tickets all 3 times. It's the 10pm showing so by the time the movie is out we went to the Nestle cafe hung out and around 1am she decided to head over to my house for some fun and spent the night watching movies and fucked a couple of times.. 4 girls in 2 days but realistically 3 in one

She didn't match my image... She had too much baggage as well, too attached to her chaotic family

This thread is full of beta losers. Actual alphas don't need to prove shit. They just are

Yeah, but she deserved it tho.

Why do you live in a car user?

Hopefully those homeless niggers raped and killed her.

Learn how to green text properly.

Would’ve been awesome if the guy grabbed an AR-15 and rightfully murdered all of you for home invasion with zero legal consequences.. That would’ve been way more alpha than your story.

>be me
>be at a bar
>some old shithead puts the extended, live version of hotel california on the jukebox
>I loudly announce that the eagles fucking suck
>he gets pissed and in my face
>i tell him the eagles fucking suck again
>he swings at me
>we fight for like 2 seconds before the bouncer and bartender tackle us
>throw us out and tell us to never come back
>he's still cussing at me
>gets in his car to drive away
>I grab a rock and chuck it at his car (some old shitty buick)
>huge crack in the back window
>he drives off, probably listening to the fucking eagles
>I walk home and shit my pants halfway there because alcohol gives me bad diarrhea

But that isn't the way the story went faggot...

>"Alpha"

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cool, sounds like y'all just committed a felony

good thing the neighbor didn't call the cops the second you left

My girlfriend and I consistently have sex with other girls together. Just had a 3 girl orgy the other day. We spent the summer in Korea. We took home 6 girls home during the trip. First time we took home 3 korean girls and 1 belgiumchick. The rest was three somes. Pic related. A black girl, a white girl and an asian plus me with my faggot ass bun (im a NYC hispanic and braid my hair, don't judge)

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>she didn’t match my image.
That’s the 5th gayest thing I’ve read today.

>Update

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I said the eagles suck, I threw a rock at his car as he drove off and I shit my pants

that's three alpha deeds in one story

>not white
>alpha

pick one faggot

Just because it isnt alpha doesn't mean it isn't the closest thing to alpha he has ever done, making it the most alpha thing he's ever done

Here's how you should have handled it
>Headbutt him for a start
>Yell at the dukebox that the eagles suck
>Go shit on the hood of his car
>Write "The Eagles suck" on his windscreen with your shit
>Dog drag your arse across his car to give him the best racing stripe ever
>Walk home naked from the waste down.

>shitting your pants
>alpha

Dude maternity wards must be intimidating af for you huh?

best thing is he's replying to a post asking me a question, which is even fucking gayer.

I said hi to my crush today

Pretty sure I'd beat your caucasian ass in a fist fight in front of your wife tho. I hate white people, yall suck, that's why I fuck your women just like my bbc counterparts

That's actually a good point. I retract my earlier statement and commend you on your level of alpha user

I never go to maternity wards

as soon as I knock a girl up, I'm packing up and moving out of state

please ignore the dipshits, you've already had more sex than they will ever have in their lifetimes and post more photos of your nekked antics

I'm so scared I'm literally shitty my pants and rubbing it on the hood of your car

White = cuck

For real, not one to brag but at 23, I've lost count of how many women I've seduced around the 100 mark lmaoo here this for u two japs bent over

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The most surprising thing about this thread is the lack of consensus on whether shitting one's own pants constitutes alpha behavior.

I live in NY so I don't have a car but I do ride a nice kawasaki tho
Double blowjob

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I was going to make fun of them, but that actually sounds fucking delicious

Oh it's you, the chaser who was messaging me a few weeks ago! Hi Oscar ;)

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Fucked GF’s, older brothers GF

I think it depends on the context of the situation.

>6'2/189cm 275lbs/125kg of strongk.gif
manlet detected

Sorry buddy

Not really a chaser, I enjoy all women! Wassup

Alpha thread
>I live in my car

Are you seriously being horny AND racist right now?

Did she fight the whole time or did she give in? How long did it last? Did anyone find out?

>I do ride a nice kawasaki

ahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha

hahahahahaaaahahahahahahahahahaha

alpha as fuck right there

>Green text
>Writes a fucking novel

He's living that Ricketty Cricket life.

Sorry I have a motorcycle and you live in your car user