Why did not Sauron just nuke entire middle earth?

why did not Sauron just nuke entire middle earth?

The atom tax was too high

You're a big eye.

He wasn't even able to become invisible

4 thou

the ring only makes hobbits invisible

Except Isildur

That was Melkor's shtick, Sauron wanted to rule the world not destroy it.

then why did not Sauron just nuke armies of gondor and rohan?

he wanted to rule the people too faggot

your orcs are going to need something to breed right?

My favourite meme

Gandalf could shut down the atoms with his wizard powers and render the bomb useless

He wasn't allowed to do that lol

why didn't the fellowship get the eagles to help bring them to mordor after gandalf explicitly told them to fly

the Istari weren't allowed to oppose Sauron with power and couldn't force others to oppose him either, but it apparently gets abused somewhat since Gandalf and Saruman use their powers both directly and indirectly against Sauron and his forces.

Why didn't he go back in time and warn himself about Isildur's sharp broken sword?

really fires my neurons

why didn't they just use reverse psychology and OFFER him the ring. he never would've accepted it out of suspicion. case closed

Tolkien is a fucking hack

HAAAAAAAAAAAAAACK

did nazgul die after assplosion or are they free from the ring?

Either stuck on middle earth as evil spirits or sent to wherever all men go when they die

He didn't want radiation to make his orcs uglier than they already are

Why didn't Mairon just travel forward in time and warn everyone that he would turn evil?

why are there no big guys in middle earth?

He could also manufacture viruses

Sauron was not as smart at taking over as everyone here thinks

Almost all the ainur live in Valinor.

if you kill your enemies they win

He was too sexy for that

Why didn't Sauron just poo poo in Gandalf's pee pee?

Why did sauron not just make another ring to rule all rings?

why didn't sauron just make another ring?

why didn't sauron just make another ring?

why didn't sauron just make another ring?

Why didn't Sauron just call the police and tell them his property was stolen?

why did sauron make the ring in the first place? wasn't he stronk enough in his own boddy

uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuhm because gold is fucking rare as fuck?

>why did sauron make the ring in the first place?

Mind control, retard.

It wasn't amde of gold,m retard

y did the saruon needed mind control when eh can makes his own army of mindless minions

Why didn't Galadriel just riverdance to mordor with the ring?

Why does he need to control the entire population when he can just control a minority of the population? Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm, I wonder...retard.

>A brief vision he had of swirling cloud, and in the midst of it towers and battlements, tall as hills, founded upon a mighty mountain-throne above immeasurable pits; great courts and dungeons, eyeless prisons sheer as cliffs, and gaping gates of steel and adamant: and then all passed. Towers fell and mountains slid; walls crumbled and melted, crashing down; vast spires of smoke and spouting steams went billowing up, up, until they toppled like an overwhelming wave, and its wild crest curled and came foaming down upon the land. And then at last over the miles between there came a rumble, rising to a deafening crash and roar; the earth shook, the plain heaved and cracked, and Orodruin reeled. Fire belched from its riven summit. The skies burst into thunder seared with lightning. Down like lashing whips fell a torrent of black rain. And into the heart of the storm, with a cry that pierced all other sounds, tearing the clouds asunder, the Nazgûl came, shooting like flaming bolts, as caught in the fiery ruin of hill and sky they crackled, withered, and went out.

Sauron isn't american

How does the ring on some dudes finger let him control an entire kingdom of people

I wouldn't call it mind control exactly since all he really succeeded in enslaving were the 9 human kings. Dwarves and Elfs were pretty much incorruptable. It is closer to controlling the power of the rings and corrupting the power itself.

retard

Why did Sauron even need the ring? He was strong enough to beat the good guys without it.

Because he controls the slave rings, and he gave those rings to the important people of different races, and they would in turn control the entire population.

>I wouldn't call it mind control exactly

I would, considering that's exactly what the slave rings do.

That's what I'm saying. "mind control" doesn't make any sense.

>He was strong enough to beat the good guys without it.

Considering how many times he failed, he's obviously not.

I'm starting to think "why didn't ( )?" is the wrong way to use "didn't".

Can we all agree that LotR is a fucking joke and can only be appreciated ironically? (Only books though. The films are visually pleasing as a perfect example of magic realism.)

It is, correct way is "why did he not ..."

You do realise the rings were made before the one, and the elf rings at least weren't made by Sauron at all? The aren't 'slave rings' and served their masters perfectly well. The dwarf rings amassed them fortunes, the human rings granted them strong kingdoms and so on. All the one did was subvert that power. The dwarf rings started attracting bad fortune like dragons, the human rings granted power, immortality and encouraged the pursuit of sorcery thus leading to the ringwraiths.

Yes, I realise the specific rings we're talking about were made as gifts to different races to be specifically ruled under the one ring made by Sauron - hence the term of slave rings. I know they work perfectly well on their own as magic rings.

LoTR is a work that basically created the fantasy genre, but I agree, it has long been surpassed by the more modern entries into that genre. It has to be appreciated as a historical artifact, but considering it some kind of epitome in this day and age is pretty odd. You don't worship Model T and say it's the best car ever just because it was the first car to win mainstream acclaim, do you?

>elves get to live long lives full of magic and peak physical perfection.
>men live short lives, have to work hard to be physically perfect, and none can be magic
>After elves get bored of being on middle earth, they get to set sail for the west, land of the dankest weed and just be high all day
>men don't get to go there. A hobbit got to go, but only after it was revealed that he saved the world did the bouncer let him in.

Why does Eru hate men so damn much?

does sauron like crab legs?

Mortality is seen as a gift.

Don't forget that at the same time everyone is like
>death is Eru's gift to men lmao
What do they mean by this?

Morogoth (and Sauron) were progressive. Morogoth knew elves would stagnate if they would live forever (Elves were still using swords after 10000 years of history, compare with humans on Earth, no elves, who went from developing writing to flying to the moon in 6000 years). Morogoth shortened elves' lifespans so they would have more urgency to do things with their lives. He favored industrialization (the cause of so much smog) and did what he could given the technological background.

Why? How is it a gift if literally any elf who wants to can hope on the man dick and gain mortality?

Do you know what a gift is?

Look, you have two kids. One you give a hundred dollars to. The other you tell to fuck off. But you also tell him that "not giving him money is a gift". You then tell the other kid that if they want, they can give all their money back to you and participate in the "gift" of the other kid.

How is that in any way fair?

You didn't tell the other kid to fuck off. You gave him mortality.

why didnt fredo just go invisible to mount doom

Why didn't Eru just make a Hell and put Sauron in charge of it - naturally, after explaining how important this job is for maintaining order?

Do you think the free samples outside of the mall chinese place are "gifts"?

Cosmically, that's about what we're talking about here. Except mankind is the likely abused wife of the owner handing out the free samples to everyone else for no pay, but a promise of no beatings if she brings in enough customers.

yes gumbo is his favorite dish

>Do you think the free samples outside of the mall chinese place are "gifts"?

No, because I wasn't created specifically with spiritual will to devour free samples. Man was created with a spiritual will to not be satisfied with staying in Arda forever like Elves are.

>How is it a gift if literally any elf who wants to can
No, not any elf can do so. One was granted it, cause she was the purest waifu who ever lived.

Why didn't they just take a shipping container, fill it with dick cheese, vagina cheese, cum, cum rags, cum socks, very dirty socks, vomit, hangover diarrhea, menstrual blood, shit from your teeth when you floss after few days of not flossing, homeless clothing and mattresses, pus that comes from your throat when you have tonsillitis, wash hobos collect water and evaporate it to have pure dirt, feces and urine of mentally unstable peoples, robots from r9k, gypsies and put the ring inside it?

>Fight and defeat Sauron's army with swords and bows
>Prophecy foretells his return to Middle Earth
>Invent no new weaponry to battle him for 3000 years

...

Friendly reminder that Silmarillion is racemixing propaganda and Tolkien is a human-hating cuk. Have a qt3.14 azn Luthien, you cuks.

Hol up, let me just invent a gun

Wasn't Galadriel the purest?

>>Prophecy foretells his return
Go ahead and quote that prophesy bro.

>Prophecy foretells his return to Middle Earth

Wrpmg/

No, Galadriel rebelled against the gods and was therefore impure.

But late in life Tolkien decided she needed to be pure so he made it like the mildest rebellion ever

Why didn't Sauron just wear the ring on his dicc??7?

she is like 15% noldor. she wasnt really engaged in anything and just tagged along

the ring transfers everyone to a non-mortal plane.
Only beings with trans-dimensional powers can stay visible and interact with the normal world while wearing the ring.

>2/10 bait

Thanks for a rare Pepe, senpai :3

>she wasnt really engaged in anything
Hardly, Tolkien at one point called her a leader and even said she was excluded from the pardon (though he changed his mind on that too).

how did the oruk hai know what a menu is?

from the nerdwiki:
> She was unusually tall and strong as she grew, and so Eärwen’s name for her was Nerwen, "man-maiden".
>Height 6 feet, 4 inches (193cm)
I bet she had a nice long dick

if you would read the books you would see that they know all kinds of shit

I don't remember the Eye from the movies when reading LOTR

BIG MOMMY!!!!!

Kinda like te faggot in the movie at the beginning right bud?>

The savages in this thread keep doing it RREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

why gimbli not use all his nanocoin to buy a powerfull magic axe and destroy the ring

So did Bilbo go to trippy nightmare world every time he used the ring to avoid pesky relatives too?

why wasn't middle earth destroyed by one of the infinite multiverse destroying beings in other timelines?

Yeah, like him.

For View.

Heh.

Literally yes. Read the book.

That's because Peter Jackson made it up. He said to himself, the lord of the rings is a pretty good book but it needs something. And then he made up the eye and he said, okay now it's perfect.