Roast my country

roast my country

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snarkynomad.com/10-fun-facts-about-croatia-youd-never-have-guessed/
youtube.com/watch?v=LWmt4GfdQDc
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I know nothing about your country. It is as relevant to the world as Papau New Guinea

Slavonia had the richest farmlands in europe and you fucked it up with communism

Uncivilized Catholic Serbs who hate their Orthodox counterparts so much they perpetrated the worst atrocities of WW2 to such an extent Germany told them to calm their shit down. Pic related, the remover of Hrvat Ustaşe

Your country's name sounds like the sound I make when I choke on dick.

You guys should be under Austrian/Magyar control still because you fucks failed to remove all the kebab, very disappoint


Americans have got to be the dumbest fucks by far on this board. You're ignorance doesn't make his country shit amerifat

nobody hates serbs anyomore tbqh with you

Your country has crossed my mind maybe twice throughout my entire existence.

how many kebabs are there

Vjera Ljubav I Domovina XDD

wat

Cheat sheet:

snarkynomad.com/10-fun-facts-about-croatia-youd-never-have-guessed/

sick roast

Oh cmon everybody knows Serbs are really Orthodox Croats.Well not anymore since you got raped by Turks which makes you genetically sand nigger.

modric is one of my fav players

a fucking racing flag to walk all over when shit hits the fan

...

that racing flag is older than your country

you have a checkered fingernail in the middle of your flag

I can't

>must be so irrelevant and small
that I have no idea what or where it is.

im surprised so many americans dont know about croatia, i mean i know we are pretty irrelevant but damn

>"right leg hospital, left leg cemetary"

My grandpa is Croatian and that whole side of the family acts like lunatics. They try to fight everyone and scream until their lungs give out. Are the rest of you guys like that? (They aren't nogs either)

no not really depends on the region desu is he dalmatian?

Croatia you say...
ok I have heard of you.

Supper Soccer on Nintendo, that's where I know you from

Probably Dalmatian. They are white niggers basically.

Yes, actually. Is that a sign?

Grandma's oven mitt lookin as flag

>OP starts thread hoping for a roasting of his country
>american instead prove their stupidity by not having a basic grasp of European geography
>by virtue of american stupidity the thread turns into a USA roast inadvertently

Croats were shit at the whole holocaust thing. Basically just had a bunch of dumb slavs hitting people in the head with hammers

well do you know the 50 American states?

>each larger, and larger GDP than your Europe...

Africa has 54, not counting south Sudan...
do (YOU) know those? probly not. irrelevant

kinda, they tend to be a lil more aggresive than the rest

>tfw Dalmatian

Most men in my family are loud, smoke ciggies, drink and are overly aggressive in a fucked joking around way.
Australians and Dalmatians are very similar.

Well more specifically he claims that he comes from the island Vis. Does that mean anything to you?

just an island in dalmatia not specific from the rest of dalmatia

Lies. I should have inherited a house in Croatia but the Croat side of my family stole it and hate us because my father fought for Serbia during the war.

>Croats were shit at the whole holocaust thing.

Jews Pre WW2:
>Croatia: ~20,000
>Serbia: ~33,000
>Bosnia: ~22,000
Today:
>Croatia: 495
>Serbia: ~700
>Bosnia: ~1200

That's a removal rate of 96.9%. We're the only ones who did it right.

>Basically just had a bunch of dumb slavs hitting people in the head with hammers
Pic related

meh i dont give a fuck to be honest most of the people i know dont hate serbs

>implying knowing all the states of an individual country equates to knowing the countries of the world
>implying anyone gives a shit about Africa

> Srbosjek
Predobra, presmijesna rijec.
Croatia is a shit country desu. It was ruined by greedy politicians. Bring Tito back.

Alright, thanks for the information. I know this was supposed to be a roast, but I had to ask.

>A
>FUCKING
>PINEAPPLE

haha no problem

Fucking turk mongrels stole more than half ouf our sea and now you filthy fuckers want even more and cut us out of international waters. You are just cristian TURKS. PURGERU JEDAN. Only good croat is a dead croat

>A
>FUCKING
>LEAAAAAAAAAAF
REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

umad?
>stole half of our sea
i will assume you are talking about istria which is maybe 0.1% slovenian

>srbosjek
Nigga that's cold as hell. Shame the partizani didn't remove ustase in the same way they removed cetnici after the war.

Croatia: Lovely countryside. Could make a killing out of its tourist industry. Sold it's economy to Germany in exchange for weapons with which to BTFO the eebil serbs.

t. diaspora filth.

>It was ruined by greedy politicians
Agreed, but I don't want communism either. Democracy could potentially work here, but all the commies have to die first. As long as they're in charge, we're not going anywhere.

Alternatively, we could give absolute power to based Hasanbegović.

Is there a lot of diaspora in emuland? My dad's family moved there in the 90s it seems like there's a lot of ex-yugos there

>Pineapple Netherlands

Literally who?

A lot over here, usually post-WWII migrants and from the 90s. To a lesser extent you get some that moved in the late 19th century and earlier 20th century.

Australia and Yugoslavia used to have a strong skilled labour trade back in the 60's and 70's. Largest influxes came around then.

Larger than wartime refugees/migrants?

This.
It wasn't just Australia - there was mass emigration from Yugoslavia due to unemployment.

Your flags thumbnail looks like a fucking strawberry

The Ragusan Republic was super comfy. A mini Venice on dry land.

I would've loved to visit Dubrovnik before GoT filled the place with normie tourists.

I have no idea whos goverment is bigger cuck, yours or mine?

I just got back from my vacation in Croatia. Dubrovnik is one big tourist trap. It's so commercialized and expensive that it made me sick. It's a shame because the city's absolutely beautiful.

tell me about the gypsies, i want to know if you killed the gypsies

Thats called "Balkans syndrome" we dont see a tourist only a big bag of money, you will get that treatment from Croatia to Greece, did you check Serbias tourist destinations? Go to Koponik or Zlatibor, these are mountain resorts, i think its cheaper to stay on the Alps and have all inclusive...

seeit's been that way for years, even before GoT

>I just got back from my vacation in Croatia. Dubrovnik is one big tourist trap. It's so commercialized and expensive that it made me sick.

Is it still worth visiting? I imagine it's over crowded with tourists because of muh GoT

Its run by the second most corupt political party in Europe. The first one is the ruling party in my country obviously.People from Split are the most inbred rednecks in history. Its filled with people from Hercegovina.Otherwise is pretty solid.

Hasenbegović is okay. Communism didn't ruin Croatia. Tuđman did. When he set up the system of giving away 99% Croatian soil to Hercegovci and making 100 thousand fake war veterans that receive a pretty nice pension for "PTSP" without actually ever firing a gun.

ITs still nice, tho we remodeled a bit during the war.

youtube.com/watch?v=LWmt4GfdQDc

>what is the ukraine

I can't really think of any Croatia maymays for you. Seems like a cool cunt to me tbqhwy. I'd like to visit.

Tons m80. Three main waves: Cetniks and Ustase running after WW2, skilled worker migrants in the 70s and war refugees from the 90s.

Kek commands us to roast nation of Crows.

you fucking Croat niggers look like racing flags always wearing checkered shit at Football games.

Some 20,000 was killed, but unfortunately parts of Bosnia were not properly sanitized.

>Communism didn't ruin Croatia.
Yugoslavia days were fine (while Tito was alive).
Unfortunately, after the collapse all the commies rebranded themselves into various democratic parties, and they've been running this country into the ground ever since. Even Tuđman was in SKH

Most popular destinations were USA, Emuland, Canada, Germany Austria and Sweden. Dunno about the rest but every other Serb has a cousin in theres countries... Money they send is basically keeping us alive.

you have the weirdest country shape even more retarded than ethiopia

I love the fact that HDZ is calling other people "commies" when 90% of the foundation members were "commies" that ditched the sinking ship. God I wish we would line them up, and burn them on Markov Trg.

hrvat je tat :')

Because traitors gave away our rightful clay

>each larger, and larger GDP than your Europe...

holy shit newfags

All I know about this region is those Yugoslave war songs.
Feels bad man.
>VHS music video power level.
Serbian>Bosnia>Croatian

What are you talking about bro? We talked about Croatia for like 3 months in American school. Way too important not to include on the curriculum.

>God I wish we would line them up, and burn them on Markov Trg.
HDZ to Jasenovac, SDP to Goli Otok.

Croatia is a faggot country that sold half of its citizens to filthy Bosnia.

You animals deserve to burn in hell.

Especially the Dalmatian Partizans and Northern Zagorac Italo-Croats.

You are not white.

>went to a place near split last summer
>local asshat wants to fight mé on the beach, stating that he hates fucking tourists

Lewl. You'd literally all die of startvation in a year without us. No proper industry or anything in the country.

>had a few other unpleasant experiences with locals there

For the first time in a few years I didn't even consider taking my money there for a vacation. I can go to spain or wherever for the same amount of money.

...

>Lewl. You'd literally all die of startvation in a year without us. No proper industry or anything in the country.
There is industry but it's all foreign owned, as are like ~85% of the hotels in Dalmacija, so the vast majority of the tourism money doesn't stay here anyway.

I've already abandoned any hope I had in this country. We all laugh at how Sweden is killing itself, but it's not any better here. The country and the people will not exist by the end of the century.

You don't deserve to exist after you sold your people from Bosnia-Hercegovina into Islamic slavery.

I hope your country burns to hell.

> end of the century
Tbqh it would be a miracle if it exists in 20 years.
It's funny how we are climbing out of the economic slump now that we have no government to spend money on stupid shit, coupled with the tourist season. We had an increase in BDP, along with a decrease in our deficit with no government at all.

>after you sold your people
I had no say in the matter.

>It's funny
I get your point but calling it funny pisses me off pretty hard.
We have communists in charge of a capitalistic system, who don't understand what capitalism is or how it works. It's obvious they don't because they're still pushing this communist mentality that the state should be controlling the economy, and as a result have created a bureaucratic nightmare that completely destroyed our private sector causing an unemployment rate of 17%, and some 45% among youth which resulted in mass emigration, which combined with an unsustainable birthrate and aging population means we will soon have no other choice but to import shitskins under the lie of "cheap labour" to maintain a functioning society.

I've been watching this happen for 20 years now and I can't even begin to describe how angry and hopeless I feel. Politics and protests obviously don't work. I want to start killing these people. I've genuinely considered it.

>Democracy could potentially work here,
hahaha
no

>scream until their lungs give out.

That's normal Croatian conversation, if you have to say something you don't wait until the other guy finishes, you just yell louder than him. This usually escalates over time.

You bet.

>Croats
>Falling for the democracy meme

You people are as inept a people as God could imagine. Your country is a shithole and I hope you burn in hell.

If you had any brain you would tear down the democracy and free your people in Islamo-Bosnia.

You fake pathetic cowards.

so wat draguslav

>THE ukraine

why is this allowed?

But user your country is beautiful, the people are cunts though

Rightful Slovenian clay.

can confirm that this goes for the entire istrian coast too

We have no "brothers" in Bosnia you cunt. Most of the so called Croats in Bosnia are Hercegovci which are pretty much balkanian jews. Parasitic, big noosed, greedy. Only thing Hercegovci aren't intelligent, but they make it up in cunning and slyness.

> A FUCKING CHESSBOARD

Your cousin broke my heart. Tell her to apologize